Lost

I don't know how to feel anymore.

I feel alone. I am alone in all these. And i believe he is feeling as lonely as i am. 

It's funny how words don't come out from my mouth now. No tears is coming out. Keeping everything inside actually felt better. I wonder, who, that is around me, would understand all these. My answer is always, no one. Or maybe there is. I don't know. I'll never know.

I don't know how to feel, i don't know what to do, i don't know what is right. I don't even know what i am typing. Everything is so foreign.

Love. Hope. Family. Illness. Tumor. Cancer. 

I dont even feel like talking to anyone about this tbh.