The Caulking Wizard

It's not every day that I can be convinced to buy something "As Seen On TV". But for quite a while I've wanted this nifty little caulking kit I once saw advertised. I'm sure you know the one-it comes with a little blue thingee (the technical term) that allows you to flawlessly finish any edge. They make it look so easy! I asked the Army Man to buy it for me for our 5th wedding anniversary back in 2008, and he never did, so when I saw it today at Walgreen's, I snatched it right up!

I knew exactly what I wanted to use it on, too. The caulk that connects our kitchen counter to our back splash has looked pathetic since we bought the house. It's only gotten worse and worse, and just a few days ago I decided I just couldn't take it anymore. So how fortuitous to see my little kit! It was like a sign that it was time to fix the caulk. I felt a little embarrassed bringing it up to the register, and of course the cashier had to remark skeptically, "I wonder if this actually works".

I started right when I got home from the store, and immediately hit a snag. Trying to remove the existing caulk was like chipping stone. It took forever and made a huge mess. And for whatever reason, chunks of caulk laying around really gross me out. I was so grossed out, in fact, that I dragged our giant shop vac all the way inside to clean up the debris rather than have to touch it myself. Applying the caulk was a disaster too. I practically giving myself carpal tunnel syndrome in the process. Probably not a good idea to use caulk that has been sitting in our freezing garage on the coldest weekend all season! It was so hard to squeeze that stuff out and I now have sore wrists and blisters on both thumbs.

After all that work, the caulking wizard thingee wasn't that impressive. I think I'll lay part of the blame on the weird angle of our kitchen counter-none of the edges on the thingee matched up, so either I would scrape off too much caulk, or too little. The edge I eventually settled on made it look really nice, but also smeared a lot of caulk on the back splash. Once it was all on, I spent close to a half hour and a ton of paper towels trying to make it look good, and I'm not totally sure if I succeeded. I guess I really don't care right now. It looks nice enough, and I sure feel great having accomplished a minor household fix all by myself!

The Revenge Of The Fly

This California girl is well-versed in the agony and frustration of ants. Those obnoxious little buggers that seem to find whatever food you leave out and descend upon it. Those little devils that have no issue breaking into your garage, your pantry, even your bedroom-just ask my brother Kurt about the time he went to put on his pajamas as a kid only to discover them COVERED with ants (we were puzzled as to why the pajamas appeared to be moving). They are everywhere. They are unstoppable. They are….nothing, NOTHING, compared to flies.

A simple line of ants, so simple to spray with some ant spray and kill. What I wouldn’t give for that pest problem! Here, not only do we have horrible fire ants outside, but the inside of our houses are constantly being overrun by flies. I’m starting to suspect there is a tiny little fly door in one of my windows (I imagine it like a tiny doggie door, only made out of netting that can easily been flown through). It is ridiculous how many flies I have to deal with on a daily basis! Days that involve outside playtime are the worst. I might as well stand at the door and just usher them in and get it over with:

"Please, come in! I can offer you some leftover crackers that Laura left in a bowl by the couch, and I’m sure there are plenty of crumbs on the carpet. Don’t forget to stop by Moxie’s bowl for a quick drink and browse the kitchen counter for tasty morsels that I may have overlooked! It’s also a delightful day for buzzing around my head as I cook, so be sure not to miss that opportunity."

Sometimes they appear out of nowhere, when the door hasn’t been opened for hours. They always seem to locate the nearest human and incessantly buzz them. When they’re invading, eating inside my house is like eating at outside at a picnic. You can’t leave anything edible out, because you know the fly is landing on it and doing a little dance just to spite you, just to show you the power it holds over you. Ants thinking of attacking your food? No big deal, just move the food to another spot. Flies bent on sampling your pot roast? Well, you better shovel it down because the flies will land on it, even as you eat it. The rest of the dinner, still hot in the pan on the stove? Transfer it straight to the fridge, food safety be damned! That’s the only way to keep it safe, unless one gets into the fridge (yes, that has happened to me).

It’s amazing how much your life can start to revolve around flies. It’s not uncommon for the Army Man and I to stand in the kitchen chatting while one of us holds the fly swatter. We've started complimenting each other on particularly gory or spectacular kills. The best is the mid-air swat. Yep, we've both managed to snatch a fly’s life during flight. It’s awesome. Laura’s method is to trap the fly between the window and the blinds, and smush. There is usually sound involved, followed by the victory shouts of my bloodthirsty daughter. I always discourage this, but I won’t deny having resorted to it myself. Moxie tries to help, chasing them and snapping at them. That form of entertainment is the one redeeming fly trait.

I’ve had flies rise from the dead and fly out of the trash can once I open it to deposit another of their deceased brethren. I’ve had a few fly relationships last days or more…a few days after a madly buzzing fly zips around the kitchen, I’ve found it limping along in my bedroom or laying pathetically on the stairs. I feel no sympathy as I kill it-only disgust wondering where it was all those days and if it was walking on me as I slept.

Today’s tally stands at nine killed, an undetermined number still at large. I can't wait for the winter.

A Simple Decoration

Just a quick post to share a little decorating project that I completed today. My friend Kim gave me this idea a looong time ago, but I never acted on it until a few days ago. I use our dining room as my craft room, and the paint job the previous owners did is a bit...unusual. It's textured (kind of like sandpaper) and it's a greyish color with flecks of gold. When we first moved in the Army Man and I vowed it would be the first change we made. In the end, the first change I made was painting over the black paint in Laura's room. Then I painted several other rooms and stopped working. That was almost 2 years ago, and I guess you could say we've gotten used to the sandpaper paint. The only problem is it doesn't give off a very "crafty" vibe, and was kind of bringing me down when I would sew.

So I chose some of my favorite fabrics, put them in the hoops, glued the fabric down in the back, and added a little sawtooth hanger. Super easy! The thing that took a while was obsessing over the placement of the hoops, but I finally got annoyed with myself and just did it. I wish it took up more of the wall, but it will do for now. I'm tempted to do this throughout the house, since this is now officially my second decoration in my entire home. I'm a bit impaired when it comes to decorating.

And now you all know what my crafting area looks like. If you want to know why I never send you any presents, it's because I spent all of my money on those piles of fabric.

Claire's Tiny Corner Of Bliss

I really had no idea what I wanted to write about today, but I didn't want to disappoint by not posting something! I was so desperate I actually started roaming around my house looking for ideas or inspiration. Other than moaning about how much I want new flooring downstairs, I really didn't come up with anything. So I went and stood by the back door, next to my favorite piece of furniture. I don't usually have a lot of time to just stand around, but when I do, I like to stand here.I wish all of my furniture looked like this. If you've never been to my house, you might be inclined to think that my entire home looks this nice. Please don't be deceived. I have one piece of white furniture in my entire house. This is it. I have one piece of furniture on which I put my treasured books that belonged to my grandparents. This is it. I have one place that is safe enough to put breakable pitchers. Yep, that's right here. So you see what I'm saying. I have one tiny little corner in my entire home that usually looks immaculate and is the exact style I wish the rest of my house was. And usually the Army Man has put some of his junk right on top of that cute little penny rug I made, so even this little sanctuary isn't safe.

What's that you say? You want to SEE the cute little penny rug I made? I'd be delighted to show you! It's one of my favorite crafts, which is why I put it here, on my favorite piece of furniture.

So that concludes today's tour of the only section of my house I will likely ever post about. I think you all would probably stop reading if I shared pictures of the rest of my home. Not that it's messy (I would never want you to think that!) but because there is NOTHING to show. I've been married over 5 years, yet I have nothing more than minimal furniture, nor do I own anything that could be construed as a decoration. A lack of clutter is great, but I'm starting to think there is such a thing as "too little stuff". Last time my Mom visited I had to bring in a lamp from another room so that she could read her book while sitting on the couch. I don't even have a sufficient number of lamps. What is wrong with me?

My Non-Curtains

Most of you have probably already seen the pictures of my kitchen window makeover, but I figured I would share them again. Back in July I was inspired by The Nester to "mistreat" my windows. This doesn't involve abuse, or even harsh words. You can read all about it here. She has a wonderful website which is constantly trying to convince me that things don't have to be perfect to be beautiful. With that in mind, I took some beautiful Amy Butler fabric I had recently purchased and cut it, hemmed it a tiny amount, and tacked it above my kitchen window with decorative tacks. Yes, it really was that easy. I'm not going to claim that it looks professional, but it adds a nice touch to the room, and it makes me happy when I look at my window.

I'd say these don't really even qualify as curtains. But whatever they are, they are super cute. And to prove that things don't have to be perfect, you can see in this picture they aren't even straight. Although me being me, I couldn't live with that and did end up fixing them. But no matter! I happily provide these pictures as proof that anyone can do something easy and quick to pretty up their home.

Can Something Break From Underuse?

It wouldn't really be fair to say that I hate my oven. It's very nice looking and has a smooth top range which is actually pretty cool. I just don't like using it since using it means that I am cooking something. And we all know how I feel about cooking. So apparently my oven had had enough of me ignoring it and used Sunday afternoon as a chance to get my attention.

I was actually planning on cooking something for lunch, and was preheating the oven when I heard a noise that sounded like water boiling over. I'm good enough at cooking to know that there shouldn't be any noises at all when an oven is only preheating, but at the same time it didn't really concern me. About 15 seconds later, the Army Man who was diligently playing video games with Laura, called to me that he thought he saw a "flash" in the oven. I went to check it out and saw that the inside of the oven was aglow! It was the heating element on the bottom that was glowing, but only in one spot, and it almost looked like it was melting. I discerned all this while the oven was closed and I figured sooner or later I would have to open the door and check it out. I wasn't too concerned, since I am my father's daughter and have had my fire extinguisher waiting under my kitchen sink since the day we moved in.

Opening the oven door was rather anticlimactic. A little bit of smoke came out, but that was it. The Army Man and I were standing there trying to figure out what had happened when the heating element sizzled a bit more and then snapped! So that's what I get for not using my oven: a broken oven.

Please don't be concerned, my oven is not actually this dirty. The heating element spit a lot of stuff around while it was melting. So now not only does my oven need fixed, but I have to clean it too. Great. I wonder how quickly I need to get it repaired before people start complaining.