Yet So Far

Call me 'The Video Producer'! I made 5 videos of total duration of 9 mins 30 sec in 14 hours on Thursday. Sounds little but it's actually very time consuming. 2 reasons, the raw videos has to be converted and the completed videos has to be exported; and my laptop is f***ing slow. Anyway, the "customers" seemed pleased with the product. Well, creativity is the key, though more can be put in.

Alas, I was promoted to Corporal (CPL) on Friday. Which means, slightly more money next month onwards. It's not exactly very significant in terms of authority difference, but it is definitely the indicator of me closer to my ORD day. WooHoo! Now, Imma look forward to Corporal First-Class (CFC) possibility.

She made my day no matter what. I'm always been thinking of her every now and then. And look forward to her tweets everyday. Though she doesn't know me, and we are few thousand miles apart.

I use miles instead of kilometres because miles is more presentable in literature. I use inch instead of centimetres because it is shorter to type. But, in math and/or science context stuff, I will use the SI units.

I'm looking forward to studying, though I reckon I will face a lot of difficulties in Uni.

From now onwards, Imma say 'World Wide Web' instead of 'WWW'. Did you even realise that it's 3 times more syllabus of the latter to the first?

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The hunger of power made the whole world blind

As the rich are wasting what the poor cannot find

Their difference in hunger had left them far behind

But it was their love to the world made them kind

Till my heart decides to put me to my eternal rest

Imma keep sounding out my plead or my request

Catch me kill me assassinate me and be my guest

I will still continue with my unprejudiced conquest

I put on the mask and hide away the burning scar

With it I can barely gaze the beautiful shining star

Those dead people had hung faces of real bizarre

As unquestionably the end of the war is yet so far

Kingdom Fell

SAFTI Soccer Cup was an event I won't forget. Why? Not because my wing won, as we didn't, but because it was one day (and night) that consisted tiredness and stress. Due to the fact that we are the admin/conducting wing, all the sh!t we have to do. And I kena arrows too. Print the photos and laminate them. Then burn the DVDs for Happy Hour, end up of no use.

Anyways, Golf/Sierra got fourth placing. Though we are a strong team to start up with. By the time we're in the semis, GK got injured, the "Manager"-cum-star-player wasn't around and all was screwed up. Ended in a tie AET, and subsequently lost the penalty shootout. At the Third-Placing match, 2 star players weren't around and we got trashed. Ah well, sh!t happens.

Then it was the Happy Hour, do nothing than being the driver for a few trips in and out of the Officer Mess. Then, saw the ugly sight of the pervy uncles. Shan't name them, it'll get ugly. The Carlsberg girls are like f***, yet the uncles go and flirt with them. Yeez. Had good food though, didn't eat much either. Nice all the same, especially the Kebab look-alike and Pulot Hitam.

By the time I was done helping in clearing up the mess (both meanings), move the things back to wingline and reach home, it was already 2330. And the washing of my jersey, was a headache as well. Since I was so tired and shagged, I didn't wash it thoroughly, and left the rest to my mom. And ended my day, with twists of tiredness and sore on the legs.

So was the following Saturday. I didn't recover my strength after such a long day, so my form damn 'chui'. Hence I didn't step on the muddy field. Partly also because I got too muddied the day before (referring to the soccer tournament).

End

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How much senses to put into your seduction

To cover your thoughts with some protection

Moving a few steps closer to your perfection

That's the way of how I'd spelled satisfaction

Investigating on all the things the thieves took

Combs the area and even give a second look

Like the way of how I'd had played the rook

Differ from the moves explained in the books

Singing those war songs I knew of all so well

Bringing the enemies from heaven now to hell

No novels had more things that you could tell

Than stories of how that inferior kingdom fell

*Untitled* (for this first time)

The viewers' rates are low. Which means, I'm writing more a diary than a blog. That's what I WAS hoping for in the first place actually. I like the way it is, restricted openness. I open out my opinions, at the same time, I don't expect people to read it. LOL.

It's rather rare to see Sergeants in my camp, and countless of LTA and above. There's a 1-star as Comdt too! I seriously don't know how to address the Sergeants. My friend even addressed them as "Ehh" or "Oi". LOL...

The last day of the week was hell of a busy day. I didn't even have time to go cut my hair. And tomorrow is the comms parade. I'd be dead if the RSM sees my hair on the left side of my beret. *Rifle points up, and cock!*

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Here I was acting in a one-man show

Putting all their nonsenses on the tow

Hold up a beat and keep the bass low

And have all the best music on the go

Your orders are call to my command

I could not defy any of your demand

Your law had put me in your remand

My errors are not up to me to amend

The life's pace is now at full throttled

With the best move that I had castled

I push hard against the foe I'd battled

For this first time the story is untitled

This Terminal

This is the time when there's simply nothing much to do on the internet. I was simply staring at the screen for most of the time when I turn on the computer. Even blogging can be such a chore when you can't think of anything to write.

Social night was a bore, nothing to SEE. Yah, the dates that were there look so normal. They did try to dress up, but blueh, looked like shit. Somehow, the officers' dates aren't that bad, or rather good.

Just how the word trust work? It seems to me that it's like thin ice, shatters when you are walking on it for too long. Seen too much of 'I trusted you before, now I don't" in the true world. Manipulated by speech costed the value of mutual trust. How much are you willing to pay for the so-called trust of others?

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Living in a world where you'll feel cold
When secret will choose to stay untold
As the history of ours will start to fold
Your own fantasies are for you to hold

How much souls are you willing to pay
Even if the love of hers starts to decay
The cost of your love is already at bay
Yet all were tested on this regular day

When you realise trust is international
You knew your plan wasn't as rational
So stop calling yourself being a natural
You'll end the journey at this terminal

Hold 'Em Poker

Went back to do things on my so-called Annual Leave. All the officers who knew were like, "I thought you AL today?" Haiz, got to settle things that were uncompleted and was urgent.

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Had a very lousy hand on the previous second

It's like my good luck had now been orphaned

And soon I will see my wallet getting tightened

As I lose this round with this Jack of Diamond

I'd try to compose music in the air like Mozart

Soon it'll look more a trend than a piece of art

But you will think I'm not clever nor I'm smart

Neglect the fact that I held the Queen of Heart

I tried to cover my poker face under the shade

So the audience wouldn't give me a good grade

Though all the luck that is on wasn't handmade

You will lose even if you had the King of Spade

More Than Just Skin Deep

Let's look at how under-paid all Wing Clerks are:

Firstly, according to the job scopes, the establishment is a sergeant. Next, on the organisation chart, they are on the 3rd level from the top of the hierarchy. Lastly, whatever the job scope was, it's definitely not going to be 8-5 only.

Dreadful days lie ahead, but there's no other dreadfulness other than the a%$holes who gives trouble to us.

Almost scored a goal for Golf Wing on Monday, actually was two. The first was when the cross was just right above my head, but I headed with the wrong part of the head, and it went too high. The later one was when the defender missed the ball, passed me and I gave it a chase but was whistled off-side by the referee who was the opponents' people. Stupid sia, all the officers said it was definitely an on-side pass. But ah well, follow the whistle, follow the whistle.

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Even the toughest time I'd followed the whistle

Didn't matter who was there to await to wrestle

What might ended up in a war than just a battle

The ending tells us that the story isn't as subtle

For what happen to be the year's finest vintage

Juiced from the shot of the highest percentage

It seemed to be a movie with a missing footage

What caused this war is just one simple ravage

With all the lies hidden inside this bloody keep

I remained wide awake even if I'd needed sleep

The cost of the reason is not going to be cheap

Truth is it's definitely more than just skin deep

Play Bastard

Whenever you are in a tough and losing situation, and you are rapidly losing your men. Whenever you are in this sort of situation, the last resort you can use, is to play bastard.

Watched a "super-blurred-and-confirm-pirated" movie - G.I. Joe. Was really cool to see the super-human body suit. Super-human flexibility and strength. But the part I really liked, was Snake Eyes vs. Storm Shadow. I liked the style of Snake Eyes, in resemblance of Naruto's ANBU. Only that he didn't have a cloak. Would like to look for HQ ones next time, and watch it again.

Today was on leave but still there's phone calls looking for me. Sighs, why are they so dependent on a clerk/someone-at-wingline. For I'm a jolly evil fellow. For I'm a jolly evil fellow. For I'm a jolly evil felloooooooow. 'Cuz nobody can deny.

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I'm one that no one can rely

A fact that nobody can deny

I need no concern nor reply

For they are all but just a lie

Sorry for all the long delays

Sorry for it as a normal day

You'll have the right of way

In game that you won't play

No war has norm standards

Nor was one had chartered

So don't be so self-centered

Enemy always play bastard

The Cold Wind Blow

One of my fave marching song:
"In the early morning march,
With my fieldpack on my bag.
I'm a long long way from home,
And I miss my mama so.
In the early morning march,
When the cold wind blow.

When the cold wind blow,
When the cold wind blow.
When the cold wind blow,
When the cold wind blow.

I know, I know.
You have to go.
So hurry back home
When the cold wind blow.

When the cold wind blow,
When the cold wind blow.
When the cold wind blow,
When the cold wind blow."

I don't really understand the rationale behind singing while marching, perhaps it was rendered as a good way to team build, and kill time during route marches, but I do like the songs the route-marching soldiers sang. Especially the above-mentioned. Another would be the OCS song. I don't get to do route marches, which is a big part of military happenings, and enjoy singing the songs. If I get a chance to, of course not possible, I will definitely sing. Though may look dumb.

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In the autumn when no bird sings
Not even one sight of a living thing
As the seasons are an endless ring
The God is their one and only king

Which side you're on for humanity
Would you be swallowed by vanity
Would you side with your insanity
Or would you be waken by reality

I know the time is getting too slow
But don't let our life system follow
Yet as our blood can carry on flow
In the spite of the cold wind blow

Subtitles

Think all you want, whether to you I'm a freak, a%$hole or bastard, doesn't really matter. What really mattered is how "noble" you really are. Your claim is insignificant, but your conscious is significant. Most of the time, you always think highly of yourselves and lowly of others. Haven't you find the chance to think back, rewind to reflect of your very thoughts that were evil? I did, and I admit, I am EVIL.

Today's book out is more like a longer version of a night's out. Tomorrow's Off-In-Lieu is busted, thanks to the people kena charged for Negligence Discharge and lost items. So, I'll be Wing Comd's runner, running back and fro the printer and his office. Blueh.

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Let's dance to the cry of war with no rhythm

Spraying the arrow heads with some venom

Enemies cannot kill us as we played possum

They're the ones dead as we had killed them

I was thrown to a jungle thick as a thick kelp

That was when I was still a newly born whelp

My war cry was still weak and was like a yelp

Thus there is no way I'm able to ask for help

Fighting this battle is no fight that was subtle

To win all I have to be is simply being brutal

I can still kill with ease despite all this hurtle

Just as my killer's intent needed no subtitles

Engage

This fucked up mother of a cadet, called and blare at me saying how dumb we were. What the fuck?! She said that the letter only reached her today, which I sent it last Friday, and was complaining about how was it possible for that return mail to reach her son and mentioning that we weren't thinking it through. Made me listen to her "I'm so cleverer than you, dumb soldiers" speech. Felt like telling her, "Sorry for the delay, and it'll be your misfortune that you received the letter late and your son couldn't read your return mail. So let your son cry when watching others reading their mails." I bet she's the last one on the list to receive the letter, others would had gotten it yesterday.

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Maybe it's the alcohol within the beer
All you guys started looking like queer
Like what were predicted by the seer
What you would hear is only their jeer

With essays I had written in the mail
To make sure our plans will never fail
So the rest of the subjects will all hail
Behold my fellows of the greatest sail

Those waves crashed like a rampage
When we endured the thunder's rage
Blocking our communication package
Making phone calls unable to engage

Sample

I decided to blog in the middle of the night (time check: 0130), because something is really bothering me and I couldn't sleep just like that. A Major called me to tell me that I'm now PES A and need to report to BMTC next week. He sounded serious but I suspected it to be a flop. I was thinking/analysing the possibilities of it being factual. I even called back home to ask if there's letter from Mindef sending to me. But when all facts sum up, it's still 50-50. Not that I like being a clerk and stay this way, but I'm sure I'm no PES A calibre. Simply because I can't complete 2.4 klick within 10 mins, best I got was 15mins 50sec. Then I was actually thinking of if I manage to pass out from the training, I might get a chance to fulfil my goal as an officer. But on the flip side of the token, things aren't that simple, calculating the facts again, it's most likely a flop than a fact. So I just hope 0800 comes, the Major calls up and tell me he got it wrong. So that, I can at least have a ease of mind regarding this matter. But when worst situation surfaces, I need to "da-bao" all my things and say "bye-bye" to OCS, and "hello" to Tekong.

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When the sight of me can be deceiving

That my words were not so believing

Hope ended so dream started leaving

Left without doing any form of paving

How much I'd wished I can live longer

So that I could get better and stronger

Facts and flops mixed into a thick blur

I cannot tell you dying is bad for sure

Pretend that my life is just as simple

Mix in the crowd of thousand people

At least you'll die after teaching pupil

Before I'd became immortal's sample

Holy Knight

So there is actually people who wanna drop from OCC? If he would to ask for my advice, I'll tell him this, "All you need to do here is to endure, endure the toughness, endure the pains, endure the sorrows and endure the time spent. After nine months, if BMTC didn't turn you into a man yet, you are now a full-grown man. (By the way, that guy that wanted to drop, he didn't even go through initiation yet.)

Freaky 2 hours of sleep on saturday was killing. All you need to do is to work all your energy on staring at the screen and a long list of particulars of people. But for all the things happened, and a cup of coffee then later tea as well, I was freaking energetic that I couldn't sleep for the next 12 hours. So ended up waking late today, blueh.

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The mental dope that you tried to sell

Thing that would ring your golden bell
Higher you went mean harder you fell

Falling into the deepest pit of our hell

It'll not be cold so forget your blanket

Around your neck will have a bracket

Throwing you into a hard steel basket

After you'd got your hell gate's ticket

Tell me tonight will be a pretty night

Get the beautiful ones out of my sight

She can be my light and on my right

And I transform into her holy knight

Death Had End

There we go again, another soccer game. But this time is the tiredness that made me run slower than usual. Furthermore, I was waiting for a call, wasn't paying much of attention. [Edit: I forgot about this, when I said I was worse than the female cadets since I wasn't combat fit, one of my sir enlightened me by saying I'm just unfit for a different reason. With that said, I have had this thought even strengthened, I would had fought to enter OCS as a cadet if I'm combat fit. And lastly, I was the only guy less-officer/spec there playing soccer. Nuff said.]

I wonder, how much sorrow has to go into your fucking useless brain in order to let you understand, the happiness you're getting now, it's temporary. Once the dream is over, it's time for you to wake up. You have a fucking long future ahead, unless you drink-and-drive or you had too much casual sex and get AIDS, then good luck. For all sorts of nonsense I'd seen, you're the most ridiculous one ever. No sense of logic, NOT ONE BIT.

I realise there's quite a number of people (including friends) that were born in the month of September. Is it that their parents had gotten a little tipsy at Christmas night and a little horny, that eventually, the father-to-be forgot all about the thing, condom? Haha, well, no offense, I believe most people's birth were planned in the first place, I hope. I would like to stay in my dream now, so, wake me up when September ends.

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When the season became my past
When your innocence still can last
Find your crew, director and cast
Before the time flies pass too fast

On the surface I may look as fine
Maybe it will be one warning sign
Remind you to keep off that line
Death will be yours and not mine

Sometimes lies weren't to offend
Just that one is trying to defend
Whose life that will take a bend
Waking me when death had end

Ending

I don't understand their attitude, they're like shit. 'Nuff said.

Now, at work, I'm more into playing sports than any other things. But the other things are the important ones. Especially booking of rooms for the new intakes. Damn, I got a problem in booking already, partially my fault since I'm unfamiliar with the system and didn't work on the booking quick enough.

Anyway, I'll be more proactive in the wing's sporting teams since they closed-one-eye on me for doing physical activities, like basketball and soccer. This is better in a sense, I won't have tummy popping out any time soon. (:

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Going into all the extreme measures

In order to get the possible pleasure

The sympathy I got from my leisure

Was much of my part of the treasure

Tried to look for my emotion's exit

And gotten the passport and permit

To reach for answers that I'll admit

Truths that I had tried hard to omit

Who says impossibility is nothing

So who came with that something

That made everybody wondering

Is it that it doesn't have an ending

Fear

Soccer today, shiok. Scored 3 goals in total, though the last one was not exactly a goal by me. It's more like an own goal by LTA Razali. The goal got diverted to the goal after touching his foot. Totally laughable. But there was a lot of shots off target by me, mainly because I lacked aiming and the kicks were uncontrolled. I either sped or kicked the ball too fast, and missed the angle to score epically. But was fun.

I got fed up by her, I spent 210 bucks on a sight that I thought will value it's price, but there's cracks showing up on the carbon bar already. What the hell. Then, I wanted to change, she kept saying need to assess the situation. I'll fucking ask for refund if she insist saying it's okay.

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You lacked the capability to react

You don't seem to accept the fact

If you want yourself to stay intact

Stay away from any body contact

Would plea for a life or a tragedy

Soon your mess will turn bloody

You'll cry for help to your daddy

Taking vengeance on the nobody

Your cry is the music to my ears

Too soft and short for all to hear

But your death is getting so near

It's my conquest that you'll fear

Envy

[Supposedly to be posted on Sunday night but I was too shagged]

AHM this morning, fucking woke up at 0245 to catch the last bus of NR3 to get to Clarke Quay. Did reach there at 0445 and met with the instructors. FYI, I didn't run, not even walked, I was there to take care of all the instructors' belongings while they run their 21-klick half marathon. 

Then rushed to SDC for SMRT Family Day that my dad registered for. Wanted to watch/play the XD Theatre, but was fully redeemed. So, we headed off to the shooting gallery and shot 15 rounds each with a SAR 21 simulators. It felt like arcade with a little recoil. The simulator for M16 that I tried during Sec 1 in NCC, the recoil was real enough, but still not as real as live firing. Then took a walk at the friendship museum, nothing much, or should say, too much to see. We were on tight schedule so I didn't spend time slowing down my pace and read the texts on the walls. 

Also, the Army Museum, the best museum I had ever, ever, visited. No only I learnt the past of national service some 40 years ago, I also get a close-to real life experience in a war zone environment, in a full-of-effects theatre. Watched 2 movie clips there, the first was not bad. The second was the best. Looking at how war will be conducted, with the effects so real, you'll really think the helicopter that dropped the Commandos was just above your head. 

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As the night storm started to get wroth

Disrupt the dreams of  the child's broth

Remove the blanket of the wetted cloth

Spoil his night and dropped into a sloth

The movement speed slowed like a rust

Time is running you better make it fast

Statements of yours putting into unjust

By all reasons due of my flirty filthy lust

Greed of yours weigh and getting heavy

The line of my pride starts to get wavy

Your gluttony of love now gets groovy

But it was not something I would Envy

Killing Joke

There were these two guys in a lunatic asylum. Then one night, they decided that they don't like living in an asylum anymore. They decided that they were going to escape. So, they got up onto the roof, and just across a narrow gap, they saw rooftops of the town, stretching away in the moon light, stretching away to freedom.

The first guy, he jumped right across the gap with no problem. But his friend didn't dare to make the leap. He was afraid of falling. So then, the first guy said, "Hey! I have my flashlight with me! I'll shine it across the gap between the buildings. You can walk along the beam and join me!" But the second guy just shook his head and said, "What do you think I am? Crazy? You'd turn off the light when I was half way across!"

-The Killing Joke, by The Joker-

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There will be a half marathon for the officers this coming Sunday, so I got to go there and take care of their stuff. Fuck. It's gonna be boring. Will be taking bus there early in the morning, 4am. Looking at things are now, I'm tired. Looking at things the way it proceed, I'm frustrated. Looking at things how will they end, I'm impatient. Why must he always give us things to do, and now, whole lot of them. I wonder, if he don't give us things to do, will he feel a pain in the ass?

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I'm an itch you cannot scratch

I'm the thief you cannot catch

I'm a ghost you cannot detach

I'm the rival you cannot match

Stating facts in the paragraph

When time had split into half

Originality marked by paraph

Note that I got the last laugh

Flames had given me a choke

I'd got blinded by the smoke

My clumsiness made it broke

Starting off by a Killing Joke

Civilized

On Wednesday, I was helping the outgoing WSM clearing up his stuff. And there was one desk glass, apparently a tempered one, that I need to move to another room for keeping before he moves them to his new unit at the next door camp. Guess what, the 1.2m x 1.0m x 0.01m glass, it broke in my very bare hands while I'm holding onto it. I swear there's nothing else touching it except my fingers and palms. And I swear the sight of it was shocking and, at the same time, funny. I couldn't stop laughing even when I found out I cut myself in the pinkie and while some personnel in-charge of the scholars told me that I got cut.

Referring to my FB post regarding the social experiment. Putting assholes in a test to see how pathetic they are, how selfish they can be, how cowardice they will become and how 'civilised' they had gotten. I'll describe more here. The game is simple, have them in a warehouse (big enough to house all of them in), include a few broken up stakes and daggers. Maybe even some petroleum, dynamite and gunpowder. And given one simple rule: only one person can leave this place alive, and they have to fight in order to do so. If by 3 hours' time, more than one person are still alive, I will blow the whole warehouse up and they all die. They will have no time to hesitant, as the ones beside them are not as "civilised" as they thought they were. (I'd agree it's something taken from the joker, but I put it in a way, more cruel and simply no way out.)

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When you thought things are systematic

They turned out to be extremely pathetic

And so you realised they are problematic

Pushing you to the path of psychopathic

I was waiting for you to pull that trigger

When I thought you did cry like a beggar

You'd walked towards me with a stagger

Your cowardice begged me like a bugger

Even though I would be totally outsized

And truthfully I got you much despised

Like how I got your own kind comprised

To test how much were you all Civilized

Divided

How come my page on blogger is so fucked up? Fucking stupid, can't even adjust the alignment of the bloody thing. Damn.

[Edit] Found the solution to it. Lucky....

Life is getting more and more boring. I need to get a life, literally.

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I had waited for her to respond

I thought I'm going to despond

I would't last living on my fond

We'll go to infinity and beyond

 Can my energy had conserved

Like fruits that got preserved

So my path can't be swerved

And I'll get what I'd deserved

Much of burden that I added

Because of you I was blinded

Just as the merger had ended

The heart of mine got Divided

Rewind

Bored! No physical activities mean I'm confined within my pathetic little office. Ironic, a physical-activity-confined NSF who has a build of a sportsman.

Long day ahead, I better start doing what WISM told me to do.

The stupid I-Net in my office suck to the core! 100 mbps is like 0.54 mbps. Fucking slow, can't even load facebook. It's a dumb ass.

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Even if I have to get on a bumpy ride

I will let the starlight to be my guide

Bringing forth the spirits to my side

Unleashing my darkness off the hide

In the ball where I was sitting alone

Like a song that is dull or monotone

And you are like a music out of tone

People like you hate me to the bone

I was told to leave no soldier behind

They think that I'm sick in the mind

Things we passed we can never find

It was the time that we can't Rewind