If You Are Happy And You Know It, Clap Your Hands!

credits to strangerstohappiness.com

How many unhappy people do you know? Take a moment and think about it. I betcha there are loads of peeps, right?

Now, how many happy people do you know? Take a moment... is it harder to come up with names of happy people that you know? For most people it is. Why is it easier to come up with a list of unhappy people that we know of? Mainly because unhappy people tend to express their unhappiness more loudly, whether that expression of unhappiness is through verbal or physical means. An article in The Star recently about a young couple who outwardly write on their relationship tiffs in facebook attests to this notion. We see and hear what seems to be a lot of unhappy people in the course of a week. They complain, they tell you the sad story of their life, perpetually rant and rave via every possible means of communication or media, they go around offending people with rudeness and expect others to understand their unhapiness, they walk and hold themselves in an unhappy way. They often frame their face with unhappiness to let the whole world know, I am not happy! Unhappy people seem to want to spread their contagious virus of unhappiness.

Now, this is not true of all unhappy people. There are also many unhappy people who withdraw from the world, they don't complain or tell you sad stories of their life, matter of fact, they have little personal interaction with others, if at all. We may not recoginize these people as outwardly unhappy, however we would not classify them as happy either.

Interesting enough, people who are happy don't often express their happiness out loud. Some happy people may even feel guilty for being happy in what seems to be a sea of unhappy people.

Happy people when they do express their happiness outwardly often are criticized by other people with things like, "This person is nuts, nobody can be that happy", "Are you really that happy or too dumb to know better", "What are YOU so darned happy about?". These types of onslaughts may cause a person to keep their happiness to themselves. They may become quietly happy and keep their happiness to themselves.

Happiness, like unhappiness is contagious. To be outwardly happy is too give off positive vibes, which effect those around us and cause a cascade of happiness throughout the world. Gautama Buddha never intended to harp on suffering when he expounded the 4 Noble Truths, but rather, was trying to provide the antidote to eliminating suffering and its causes which ultimately leads to happiness. My late-Dad's wish for a movie producer to for once, give a surprise ending whereby heroes as well as villians perish altogether...... never quite came through, since even the producers always seemed to follow the path of eventual happy endings, probably with the hero and damsel locking in a passionate embrace. Happiness sells!

When you are happy, let the world know it, let the world see it in your face, your walk, your style. As Danny put it, "be in vogue!". If some grumpy person questions your happiness, understand where they are coming from and reaffirm your happiness, be happy to be happy! And if their bad vibes persists, we could choose to offer helping advise or just walk away from them when the efforts are in vain.

Please note, I am not suggesting that you live with rose colored glasses on or that everything will always be as you want it to be. Happiness is a state of being that trancends the daily problems that may befall us. You can choose to be happy instead of wallowing in self-pity, and you can choose to allow your happiness to shine through and light up the world!

As the song says, “If you are happy and you know it, clap your hands”.

Go on, pamper yourself a bit more from now onwards. Put on a flashy smile and allow yourself to dwell in a lil' happiness. I'm sure you deserve it! ^_^










"Walk on a trail of loving kindness
Walk on a path of compassion
And all else around you will be beautiful."
Every Blessing

We are all on a journey

credits to beanoriginal.net


Dear Cheryl,

I believe that we are all on a journey which takes many different paths and the path that we are on may differ with that of someone else. These is no right or wrong whichever path we pursue, they are just plain and simply differing paths which suit us and thus, we choose. We choose these paths consciously or unconsciously, however we do choose the path which we are on and we choose to change paths at times. It is important to remember that as we may be on different paths, we also may be at different points of awareness in our journey.

I point this out because as we are on our journey and we read and listen to different teachers, it is important to recognize that depending on where we are at in our journey will often dictate how we interpret what we read and hear.

There are often times when I read something or listen to someone speak and I don't get what they are saying or I find that what they are saying does not speak to me at that moment. This is not a bad thing, this simply may mean that either the person really made no sense at all, or we are not yet ready for the lesson which is being taught. For the former, it is still a lesson in itself as our awareness is heightened that people come in different shapes and sizes, and certainly with differing minds, sane or whacky. We may pick up the same reading material a week from now, or years from now and find that the lesson now speaks to you. The light bulb goes on and you say, “Wow! That is so simple, I get it, and it makes so much sense". This simply indicates that we are now at a place in our journey where we are ready to learn that lesson.

Life is about choices; filled often to the brim with decision-making processes and fraught with both pleasures and obstacles. The choices we make determine the course/ direction of our journey. I shared this little comment with a dear friend during a most recent conversation. Further thoughts on the matter has made me aware too that people tend to get all worked up, losing sleep and beating themselves up as they become aware of their journey and they get frustrated because the journey is not going the way they desire or as fast as they desire, or that the changes in the paths they are taking are not as seamless and as smooth as they would like them to be.

We learn when we teach.

Remember, every pebble along the journey is a lesson. Embrace the lessons, enjoy the journey.

The journey is the lesson, not the destination. Enjoy the scenery along the way, be aware of all that is there to see as we move along our journey. Appreciate the different paths. Enjoy the textures of each path, some are rough, some are moss-covered smooth, some are hard, while some are cushioned, like sand beneath our feet. Some paths may even feel like mud, where we could get stuck at times. Embrace the paths, meander with positive gusto and enjoy them for what they are and realize that we have many paths to choose from.

As we come across other students and teachers in our journey, recognize and understand that they may be at different points in their journey as compared to what we are. We ought to take the time to learn from each other, for each of us are full of lessons to teach and hunger for the lessons that others have to teach us!

To my dear kind friend, the learning process continues for each and every one of us, regardless of our ages and length of time in life's experience. I truly believe that with patience, those we teach and ferry would eventually see the guiding light, albeit with many obstacles along the harsh arduous journey; the same of what we experience when we go though the learning journey.

May your journey be full of love!







"Walk on a trail of loving kindness
Walk on a path of compassion
And all else around you will be beautiful."
Every Blessing

If you could turn back time, would you have lived life differently?

An elderly house-builder was ready to retire. He told his employer of his plans to leave the house building business and live a more leisurely life with his wife enjoying his extended family. He would miss the paycheck, but he needed to retire. He would get-by.

The employer was sorry to see his good worker go and asked if he could build just one more house as a personal favour. The builder said yes, but in time it was easy to see that his heart was not in his work. He resorted to shoddy workmanship and used inferior materials. It was an unfortunate way to end a dedicated career.

When the builder finished his work, the employer came to inspect the house. He handed the front door key to the builder. "This is your house," he said, "my gift to you." The builder was shocked! What a shame! If he had only known he was building his own house, he would have done it all so differently.

So it is with us. We build our lives a day at a time, often putting less than our best into the building. Then, with a shock, we realize we have to live in the house we have built. If we could do it over, we'd do it much differently. But we cannot go back.

You are the builder. Each day you hammer a nail, place a board, erect a wall. "Life is a do-it-yourself project," someone had said. Your attitude and the choices you make today build the "house" you live in tomorrow.


Build wisely!
Author unknown





"Walk on a trail of loving kindness
Walk on a path of compassion
And all else around you will be beautiful."
Every Blessing

Be Careful Of What You Wish For

credits to honeysmompetbeds.com

"More tears are shed over answered prayers than unanswered ones"
~ Mother Teresa

For those who have followed my blog from the very beginning, they may have noticed me having mentioned this wonderful holy sage almost as many times as His Holiness The Dalai Lama.I have read and re-read the above quote a few times over the course of the last few days. What I hear in this quote is the old adage

"Be careful what you wish for, because you might just get it"!

What exactly is the link between the two? Without fussing around with words, I gather that it is exactly what it says, to be careful what we wish for, fully comprehend what we are asking for, before we post our self-fated wish unto the universe. This means that we need to probe further and understand all of the possibilities of our wish(es). We all make wishes, it is very common to hear someone say "I wish ______! When we do this, the wish is usually very general in nature, like, "I wish I would finish the assignment that I need to accomplish", "I wish I had lot's of money, striking Sports Toto's RM40million jackpot!", the desperates' "I wish I could find a gorgeous partner", "I wish that I didn't have to go to work at every early dawn or on blue Mondays”, "I wish I had the Midas touch”, etc. Oops, how did that last one get in there, we all remember what happened to King Midas, right? (we should be ashamed of ourselves for not having learnt his lesson, isn't it?)

The point that Mother Teresa was making in her quote was truly simple, be careful and have full awareness of what we pray for, wish for, think about, because it may happen and because we really were not specific and we didn't think it through enough, we may be more often than not, end up being unhappy with what we get.

"As you think, so shall it be!"

Indeed, the power is all via the mind.We have the power to manifest whatever we focus on. Our thoughts will become our reality. It is my belief that this is a universal law, this is not a concept or a "New Age" philosophy. This is how it works! Mother Teresa understood this, as have many of the great thinkers throughout time.

Here is a key point about the law of attraction, the power of our thoughts, the universe does not distinguish between what will be good for us or bad for us, it simply fulfills what we are praying for in its own special ways, though not realized nor understood by us; asking for, wishing for, or focusing on. This is a critical point that we need to understand because, we may get what we pray for, and find out that it is not what we wanted or that it is not what we meant, or there were other things, people that were affected by this outcome that we did not consider! The combination of possibilities is even too many for us to comprehend; but the awareness narrows the risk of failure and brings us better odds. Once we understand the power that we have within, the power of our thoughts, not only will we be careful what we wish for, we will also be very aware of what we think about, what we focus on. How perfect it is then that we on automatic mode to mind transformation and in the process, increase the percentage of what our wonderful brains could be tapped; especially since scientists have concluded that we use less than 5 percent of our brains' potential. The Buddha realized this potential and harnessed the power of the mind to which we now have come to understand as gaining Enlightenment.

Thus, we should just go forth and wish for what we want, and we will receive it! Before we do, be very sure that we have an understanding of what our wish being granted means!






"Walk on a trail of loving kindness
Walk on a path of compassion
And all else around you will be beautiful."
Every Blessing

Proverb Worth A Thought

“Treat the earth well: it was not given to you by your parents, it was loaned to you by your children. We do not inherit the Earth from our Ancestors; we borrow it from our Children.”

~ Ancient Indian Proverb

"Walk on a trail of loving kindness
Walk on a path of compassion
And all else around you will be beautiful."
Every Blessing

To Err Is Human

It was late. In the light of the oil lamp John was mixing ingredients to form a medicine. Than he made a mistake. John accidentally added carbonated water instead of plain water to his recipe. John took a sip. Mmmm this tastes delicious and refreshing, he thought. It was 1886. The man was John Pemberton He just invented Coca-Cola.

Especially when trying something new we tend to make mistakes. Only heaven knows how many I 've made in 2008, my most turbulent year on record.Through trial and error we learn. There are not that many people though who turn mistakes into opportunities or learn from their mistakes. We cover up mistakes or we tell people off when they make a mistake. Did you ever hear somebody say "oh come here I'll do it from now on. This is already the second time that you make a mistake."? Some hear it often when they are young. A door is closed for them. They don't get the opportunity to learn anymore. The more risks we take in our lives the more chance we make a mistake. I think the reason that people are afraid to make mistakes is that they are too often penalised for it. That's why they invented brainstorming to come up new ideas. The rule is that no idea is strange or gets ridiculed. Every idea is valid. People then feel less threatened and are not so afraid to make mistakes. Brainstroming happens a lot at my workplace. Coupled with good food breaks, courtesy of Domino's pizza or the occasional "tong sui" desserts (I'm afraid I do tend to spoil them at times), creatives juices flow freely, at times, even rambunctiously.

The most successful people I think are the ones who persevere. If we are able to deal with the feeling of frustration and rejection we move forward. A great thing is that we still can build self esteem in our workers or peers by allowing them to make mistakes and not making a big deal out of it. Without the constant pressure and fear arising they will deal with mistakes a lot better. Of course we have to take calculated risks or we let a person do things we can think he/she can handle. Working my way up from being a Junior Accountant, I've certainly experienced the hardships of worklife and the rewarding lessons I've learnt from making all those mistakes. I do emphatize with the new employees especially the fresh grads. We have to try new things that are safe. Just as a pilot can't take a risk a young child can't take too many risks either.If we do make a mistake, stop and think. What did I do wrong? How can I do it better next time? I make this mistake many times. Every time I diet I am too strict for myself I can't keep it up and stop but....I make the same mistake next time. In many things I have to learn to think first and find new ways of behaving. I have to learn from my mistakes. By the time I learned from them all I will probably be old but a lot wiser. Therefore we can learn a lot from the Elders. Don't make the mistake to ignore them. They carry a lot of wisdom.

If At First You Don't Succeed ...........................

Author Unknown

Failure doesn't mean - "You are a failure,"It means - You have not succeeded.

Failure doesn't mean - "You accomplished nothing,"It means - You have learned something.

Failure doesn't mean - "You have been a fool,"It means - You had a lot of faith.

Failure doesn't mean - "You don't have it,"It means - You were willing to try.

Failure doesn't mean - "You are inferior,"It means - You are not perfect.

Failure doesn't mean - "You've wasted your life,"It means - You have a reason to start afresh.

Failure doesn't mean - "You should give up,"It means - You must try again.

Failure doesn't mean - "You'll never make it,"It means - It will take a little longer.

Wish you a lot of mistakes today, Anthony .......... and all the people whom you care for.

"Walk on a trail of loving kindness
Walk on a path of compassion
And all else around you will be beautiful."
Every Blessing

I set you free!

If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it was, and always will be yours. If it never returns, it never was. We do not possess anything in this world, least of all other people. We only imagine that we do. Our friends, our lovers, our spouses, even our children are not ours; they belong only to themselves. Possessive and controlling friendships and relationships can be as harmful as neglect.

~ Alison Willcocks

THE ORIGINAL VERSION : If you love something, set it free... If it comes back, it's yours.. If it doesn't, it was never yours....
THE PESSIMIST VERSION : If you love somebody, set her free... If she ever comes back, she's yours. If she doesn't, well, as expected, she never was....
THE OPTIMIST VERSION : If you love somebody, set her free... Don't worry, she will come back.
THE SUSPICIOUS VERSION : If you love somebody, set her free... If she ever comes back, ask her why. If she doesn't, also ask her why.

THE IMPATIENT VERSION : If you love somebody, set her free... If she doesn't come back within some time limit, forget her.

THE PATIENT VERSION : If you love somebody, set her free... If she doesn't come back, continue to wait until she does ....

THE PLAYFUL VERSION : If you love somebody, set her free... If she comes back, and you love her still, set her free again, repeat ....

THE LAWYER'S VERSION : If you love somebody, set her free... Clause 1a of Paragraph 13a-1 in the 2nd act of the Matrimonial Freedom Act clearly states that ....

THE ANANDA KRISHNAN  (ASTRO) VERSION : If you love somebody, set her free... If she comes back, I think we can charge her for re-installation fees and also tell her that she's supposed to leave her decoder on at night to enable an upgrade.

THE COUNT DRACULA VERSION : If you love her, set her free... If she comes back, get a refill. If she doesn't come back, go find her when stock is low.

THE STATISTICIAN'S VERSION : If you love somebody, set her free... If she loves you, the probability of her coming back is high. If she doesn't, your relationship was improbable anyway.

THE POSSESSIVE VERSION : If you love somebody, don't ever set her free.

THE MBA VERSION : If you love somebody, set her free... instantaneously... and look for others simultaneously.

THE PSYCHOLOGIST'S VERSION : If you love somebody, set her free... If she comes back, her super ego is dominant. If she doesn't come back, her id is supreme. If she doesn't go, she must be crazy.
THE SURGEON'S VERSION : If you love somebody, set her free...but not before she signs on the indemnity.

THE FINANCE EXPERT VERSION : If you love somebody, set her free... If she comes back, it's time to look for fresh loans. If she doesn't, write her off as an asset gone bad.

THE MARKETING VERSION : If you love somebody, set her free... If she comes back, she has brand loyalty. If she doesn't, reposition the brand in new markets.

and finally,

THE GORDON RAMSAY (HELL'S KITCHEN) VERSION : If you love somebody, set her free... If she comes back, tell her to %&$# off. If she doesn't, make sure she gets the message to %&$# off.

Ah, truly loved these many versions! Made a few additions and did a lil' tweak on some though. Please do humour us with your versions, if any.

On a more serious note, fully agreed with Alison that we do not possess anyone in this world. We are naturally inclined to control other peeps lives. I suppose those with kids are allowed to because the lil' ones need to be guided. The same applies to my staff as well. It's either order or total chaos at the workplace; I obviously chose the former. But I do try to allow them some freedom tho' as each has his/her own unique capability and should be given the chance to blossom and enhance their special skills.

On another note, after having dealt with some negatively-charged people in recent-times, I 've finally been able set myself free from their hostility which certainly did not augur well at all towards my wellbeing.

OM to that!

<

"Walk on a trail of loving kindness
Walk on a path of compassion
And all else around you will be beautiful."
Every Blessing

Cease doing battles

credits to www.techiteasy.org

A blogger friend recently asked me why I seemed to unusually remain rather emotionally subdued during the blog-war I was dragged into earlier this year. That question actually drifted in and out of my mind during the weekend, bearing in mind my fiestiness that would have cause the whole affair to have overblown into a torrid hate-war should the situation have happened during my earlier years.

Does it hold true that our temper is more subdued as we grow older, or because experience has taught us to care less and avoid hurtful extremities that so many people choose to engage in their lives, more so these days?

Battle is conflict. We incur stress, and we incur physical, emotional and spiritual injury. Wishy-washy emotions take over and create mindless chaos. We have moments when we feel have won a battle which are often followed by long periods of times where we feel we have lost or giving up and succumbing to that which we feel is the enemy. When we do give in or give up we then go through bouts of anger, frustration, and guilt. We may even label ourselves as weak and unworthy or as a loser. We may feel as though we become a prisoner of war in our self-created mindprison that we cannot find a way to escape the side of duality which we believe is the enemy.

Many people get caught up in duality and the belief that life is a battle between ego and spirit, light and dark, good and bad. What if I were to say to you that the battles of duality are simply something that we conjure up and that it is not necessary to be in a war between dualities? If we were to cease battling against our ego, cease battling for the power position in a relationship, how would that change our lives? How much less stress would be removed if we did not view ourselves being in some sort of cosmic battle always?

I believe I did the proper thing to have not succumbed to the dastardly actions of thoe warmongers. It's also very mind-draining to engage with people who perpetually wallow in hate. I was amazed at the peace that I found when I realized and accepted that the battles that we fight are a creation of our making. Consider the battles that we engage in presently, may we be battling our weight, or battling depression, cancer, our significant other or maybe we feel that we are a pawn in the battle between heaven and hell.

Remembering my spiritual Guru's advise that it is better that we should retreat in times of conflict and to just defend our fort that is our mind. To push forward is to hurt all parties involved which doesn't augur well in our spiritual path.

Even when we feel that we have won a battle we don’t feel satisfied for very long. Like a mercenary we often become addicted to the stress and stench of war and we crave to engage in yet another war, even though we intrinsically know that to war is to cause harm to ourselves in the long run..

It is difficult when we are in the midst of that which we deem a negative experience; to accept that it is happening for a reason not yet visible to us, yet it almost always is. Matter of fact we may never know the reason in this life time, the reason may not be revealed until the next leg of our journey that lies beyond this physical form. I've always termed this feeble body of mine; the temporary capsule that retains my soul to serve a higher purpose before my next spiritual journey.

Life does not have to be all war. When we accept that all things happen for a reason we then do not engage in a battle of what is.

We accept, we listen, we watch and we learn.

We cannot be living a life of unconditional love and at the same time be in battle. It is when we try to do both that we find ourselves on a self destructive path. The path is lined with misery, guilt, depression, etc.

We can choose today to lay down the weapons of the battles that we are engaging in and approach everything instead with love and trust that the love that is our authentic being will rise to surface. It is not an easy task, but with constant practise, I believe we would only dwell more on the positive side.

Quoting His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama, "It is better to engage in having concern for others. If you practice sincerely and with persistence, little by little, step by step you will gradually reorder your habits and attitudes so as to think less about your own narrow concerns and more about others' – and thereby find peace and happiness yourself."

May we find a way to dismiss our battles and allow the light which is to radiate and provide warmth of love to our loved-ones and for when we do, I truly believe we will attract more light onto our lives thus creating a powerful effect which has less room for battles.





"Walk on a trail of loving kindness
Walk on a path of compassion
And all else around you will be beautiful."
Every Blessing

At peace

At peace, my hands mudra-clasped await,

No care for storms or the deepest sea;

I rant no more against hurt nor fate,

For lo! myself shall return to me.

I ponder my haste, I hasten delays,

For nothing avails this life a maze;

I strive amid the eternal ways,

Aware that mine shall know my face.

Asleep, awake, in future or today,

The loves I seek are seeking me;

No storm can drive my soul astray,

No tide to change my destiny.

What matter if I'm all alone?

I wait with serenity the coming years;

Me, myself shall reap where hath sown,

Whilst filling its essence of tears.

The birds come to the trees of high,

The flowing waters unto the sea;

No hurt, nor grief, nor pain, nor sigh,

Can refuse my own away from me.

"Walk on a trail of loving kindness
Walk on a path of compassion
And all else around you will be beautiful."
Every Blessing

We All Want To Be Loved

While waiting to assist a friend who was moving to a new place closer to his office last weekend, I noticed the most adorable, chubby, brown & white bulldog that belonged to a neighbouring family.

Completely taken by this magnificent creature, I leaned over, reached out my hand and attempted to call it over to me. Instead of rushing over, he just cocked his head and looked at me as if I were speaking gibberish.

Then it dawned on me that I was probably asking too much, being a stranger as he seemed to give me a lil' growl which probably was a  "do not come near me" indication. Wanting to connect to this little bundle of joy, I dug deep into my memory for the few doggy tricks I learned years ago and asked it to come, but still nothing.

Still failing miserably, I asked my friend's ex-housemate whether she had seen this dog being friendly to strangers and received a reply to the negative. I then asked myself “Would this cute mutt respond simply to my love?”

To test my hypothesis, I closed my eyes and focused on the most loving thing I could think of. As I held that thought, I began to feel my love grow. When I felt I could no longer contain my own love, I imagined sending all that love to him.

When I opened my eyes, I no longer felt the need for him to come to me. I felt only love. Ironically, it was at that very moment he walked right over to me. With only the gate seperating us, I reached down, extended my hands in between the steel bars and he began licking my hand like we were the best of friends.

Witnessing this, my friend's ex-housemate exclaimed, “Wow! How did you do that?”
I smiled ...................

I didn't reply to her query as I felt it would have sounded corny. But at that moment prior to the connection, I remembered having imagined something I love with all my heart and when my heart was full, I imagined emitting all of that love to him.

That was probably the most reliable and workable animal trick that I learnt which was to treat animals with respect, love and kindness. That is why animals would naturally and even sometimes carelessly respond to animal-lovers when they received positive signals, as some of you may have witnessed before too.

They respond best to love.
As I imagine we all do.






"Walk on a trail of loving kindness
Walk on a path of compassion
And all else around you will be beautiful."
Every Blessing

An Emo blog post (who says I'm all positive always?!)

Most nites, there is a fuzzy black mutt lying on my sternum

he sings things and paws me but it doesn’t help really
it's that time of year again
your antics that i am missing so much

i wish we never stopped loving each other

those midautumn kisses are all but a diminishing memory

the loving times were the most hopeful

i lost something when i tried to gain something

All of life seems so difficult sometimes

like clipping my toe nails was an accomplishment today

raising that oblong will be an accomplishment tomorrow

even though i have done it almost every day now

it still feels like forever

this turmoil

is good for blogging though, right?

except i lied

my nails are unkept, still

i implore you to love me regardless

"Walk on a trail of loving kindness
Walk on a path of compassion
And all else around you will be beautiful."
Every Blessing

Abundance defined

Lil' Junior. Isn't he simply adorable?!

credits to medielicious

Abundance isn't only something we manufacture. It is something we tune into. And if our imaginations are allowed to be limitless .... ?

This morning the sunrise was so brilliant, it was blinding! My lil' pet, Junior was out in the garden looking towards the sun in a sphinx-like pose. The light had caught his black shiny coat which glistened nearly as bright as the sunrise. He looked so strong and full of himself .... regal like. so unlike his owner lol!!! :P Though he is usually focused on many happenings around him, but this morning, he seemed solely entranced by the light and colour and oblivious to his role of protecting his human family's home. the bark, that is, not the bite!

As he basked alone, he seemed to be absorbing as much of the sun's awakening energy as we humans try to do. I think it allowed him to feel abundantly whole, as well as part of a bigger universe.

Actually, he was scanning the yard looking for other moving lifeforms and that odd wilted orchid in an attempt to satisfy his predatory cravings. But, there was a moment when I believe he was reflecting on his dogginess.

One within himself....One with nature.

Abundance defined. Thank you my precious Junior, yet again, for being my teacher this morning.

"Walk on a trail of loving kindness
Walk on a path of compassion
And all else around you will be beautiful."
Every Blessing

Mondays Can Be Wonderful

from erstories.net

My Mondays are usually eventful, and this morning was no exception. I rode the elevator with a lady who works in the upper floors of the same building. As this lady got off the elevator to go to work, I flashed my most radiant smile and wished her a great day, she turned to me and said “I seriously don’t know what to wish for more, for this lousy today to be over or for this week to end quickly” At first, I was taken aback by such a remark before thinking to myself that this lady's thoughts reeked of negativity. What a shame it is to wish your days away! I find that I often gladly do just the opposite, I am often wishing that the day was longer, that I had more time in the day, 30 hours if possible, not just because there is so much to do, so much to live for, but also because I had been given a 2nd lease of life not too long ago plus my days are so interesting now even on those days when there's not much to do that I hate to see them end. Going to sleep early seems to me as such a waste. I know, I've been nagged on for being a night creature for far too many times.

If we could only realize that there is no tomorrow (somehow the  number "2012" always crops up in my mind nowadays), that today is precious and that to wish it away is to live in a type of self-induced limbo. That is, if we are wishing today away, then we are not being present in the moment and since tomorrow which is guaranteed to no one, has not happened, we are in a state of mental-limbo.

We human beings are a weird lot, right?

The really sad part is that most people who are wishing their day away are not doing anything that will make tomorrow, next week or the next 10 years any better, hence they end up in a vicious cycle of wishing their days away for various illogical reasons, which in the end becomes a series of days which cumulates to a life time and before they realise it (or never!) they find out in they have wished their lives away.

We ought to cherish each and every day and moment. There are so many wonderful possibilities in each day, there is so much joy to be experienced, especially in the presence of loving family and friends. Even on our worst of days when nothing seems to be going right, there are still lessons to be learnt, joy and wonder to found in each day. Flowers grow out of dark moments. I know it's truly hard sometimes, especially when a barrage of problems crop up from nowehere, but we simply must be aware that the only time we have is NOW and that the only place is here and that we must learn to be open to all that is happening within and around us. It's only human to dwell in negativity but allow only for a short moment. Know your beauty and the beauty of this world will unfold in front of you.

May your worst day, at a minimum be a “manageable” day.

P.S. I had a short chat with another negatively-charged sentient being early this afternoon . He sighed before telling me that he was going to have a “SHITacular” day! Zoiks! if not positive, he is certainly creative in his negative approach to his life, lolz! Little did he know that through his negative view on "his world" that he inspired me to appreciate my day that much more.

May you find peace and joy in your day, may you live in the only time you have which is “now” and know the sanctity and glory of each moment.

Have a charming new week, my dear friends!




"Walk on a trail of loving kindness
Walk on a path of compassion
And all else around you will be beautiful."
Every Blessing

Voice

Listening to language, spoken melodiously, is real treat.

Reading writing, written well, is even better.

The rhythm of language, keenly plucked, like a seasoned old bass in a jazz quartet, deliver's the writer's message.

We call such fusion of tone, idea, rhythm and words - voice. Like our signature, our writer's voice is individualistic.

Many of us are curiously drawn to read certain authors because of their unique voices. Columnists, poets, novelists, and historians, to name just a few, draw us in, as we hope for another dose of their special and individualistic brand of thought. Getting our message across, our voices heard, presents a special challenge.
The best way to present our voice, is to show it.

It is certainly not easy for the most of us, I believe. Sometimes, our earnest attempts to find our voices become lessons by themselves. The use of exaggerated melodramatic vocabulary, scenarios overlaid with selected adjectives and adverbs, plus the indiscriminate profanity and sexuality ..... so applicable to the monkey world nowadays about which the writer is writing, creates individual voices.

I will always remember the kind words of advice from a teacher of mine back in secondary school, La Sallian Brother Andrew, who graciously advised us to use our writing voices to reveal our innermost thoughts in an expressive manner that tells of our true nature, whilst at the same time, sternly forbade us from misrepresenting our voices and to show off in a very bad way.

I must admit that after so many years, I do still falter along the way.

Voice is like a fingerprint, a signature, unique to each writer.

Finding a writer's voice sometimes takes years; sometimes an endless pursuit. Life experiences impacts voice and tone. The words we choose, the tone we take, the stories we tell, the rhythm we snap - all help to establish voice.


Thus, I'll end this first post of 2010 with a word of gratitude to all my dear fellow bloggers who have helped me find the path to my voice, or at least closest to it.

And to the cherished bloggers who feel they are still fumbling with their words, fret not, continue finding your voice! ^_^




"Walk on a trail of loving kindness
 Walk on a path of compassion
 And all else around you will be beautiful."
 Every Blessing

Learning From Our Mistakes

It was late. In the light of the oil lamp John was mixing ingredients to form a medicine. Than he made a mistake. John accidentally added carbonated water instead of plain water to his recipe. John took a sip. Mmmm this tastes delicious and refreshing, he thought. It was 1886. The man was John Pemberton He just invented Coca-Cola

~ from the Coca Cola historical archives

We make mistakes, we all do!

Especially when trying something new we tend to make mistakes. Only tushita heaven knows how many I 've made in 2009, one of my most turbulent years on record.Through trial and error we learn. There are not that many people though who turn mistakes into opportunities or learn from their mistakes. We could certainly blame our narcissistic egos on that! We cover up mistakes or we tell people off when they make a mistake. Did you ever hear somebody say "oh come here I'll do it from now on. This is already the second time that you make a mistake."? Some hear it often when they are young. A door is closed for them. They don't get the opportunity to learn anymore. The more risks we take in our lives the more chance we make a mistake.

I think the reason that people are afraid to make mistakes is that they are too often penalised for it. That's why they invented brainstorming to come up new ideas. The rule is that no idea is strange or gets ridiculed. Every idea is valid. People then feel less threatened and are not so afraid to make mistakes, ask KeenYee! Brainstroming happens a lot at my workplace. Coupled with good foodie breaks, courtesy of Domino's pizza or the occasional "tong sui" desserts (I'm afraid I do tend to spoil them at times), creative juices flow freely, at times, even rambunctiously.


The most successful people I think are the ones who persevere. If we are able to deal with the feeling of frustration and rejection we move forward. A great thing is that we still can build self esteem in our workers or peers by allowing them to make mistakes and not making a big deal out of it. Without the constant pressure and fear arising, they will deal with mistakes a lot better. Of course we have to take calculated risks or we let a person do things we can think he/she can handle. Working my way up from being a Junior Accountant, I've certainly experienced the hardships of worklife and the rewarding lessons I've learnt from making all those mistakes. I do emphatize with the new employees especially the fresh grads. We have to try new things that are safe. Just as a pilot can't take a risk a young child can't take too many risks either. If we do make a mistake, stop and think. What did I do wrong? How can I do it better next time? I make this mistake many times.

Every time I diet I am too strict for myself I can't keep it up and stop but....I make the same mistake next time. In many things I have to learn to think first and find new ways of behaving. Hell-in- damnation, I've even had to tone down my writing from this post onwards to extinguish Manglish's fiery complaint of having to read my posts as often as a few times each post before he could fully comprehend my rantings :P  I have to learn from my mistakes. By the time I learned from them all I will probably be old but a lot wiser. Therefore we can learn a lot from the older generation eg Granma Twilight.  Don't make the mistake to ignore them. They carry a lot of wisdom.


If At First You Don't Succeed ...........................
~ Author Unknown


Failure doesn't mean - "You are a failure," It means - You have not succeeded.


Failure doesn't mean - "You accomplished nothing,"  It means - You have learned something.


Failure doesn't mean - "You have been a fool,"  It means - You had a lot of faith.


Failure doesn't mean - "You don't have it,"  It means - You were willing to try.


Failure doesn't mean - "You are inferior,"  It means - You are not perfect.


Failure doesn't mean - "You've wasted your life,"  It means - You have a reason to start afresh.


Failure doesn't mean - "You should give up,"  It means - You must try again.


Failure doesn't mean - "You'll never make it,"  It means - It will take a little longer.


Wish you a lot of mistakes today, Anton .......... and all the people whom you care for.



"Walk on a trail of loving kindness
Walk on a path of compassion
And all else around you will be beautiful."
Every Blessing

Attachment: The biggest problem on earth

You are so fortunate being fortunate to put much effort of body, speech and mind into seeking inner reality, your true nature. When you check how you have spent most of your precious life, you can see how fortunate you are having the chance to make this speech even once. So fortunate!

I'm not just making it up, "Oh, you're so good!," trying to make you feel proud. It's true. However, to really discover that all human problems, physical and mental, come from attachment, is not an easy job. It takes much time.

For example, if you are at a meditation course, you might start thinking about home; your warm house, your comfortable bed, chocolate cake. You remember all these nice things. Then your ego and attachment get to work., "Oh, I don't know about this course. I'd be better off home.At least there I could enjoy myself."
But we know what's going to happen when you get there. Still, attachment follows your ego's view, "My bed is so good, I'll be so comfortable back home; my family is there, I can relax and do whatever I feel like, I'll be free. Here I'm not free and I have to try to be serious. Anyway, my serious mind doesn't seem to be functioning, so I might as well leave."

Your dualistic attachment kicks in, telling you so much stuff, convincing you until you say "Yes, yes, yes"and leave.

So then you get home, and you're sitting in your room, and you do a self-check. How silly! nothing's new. There's no place on earth where you're guaranteed to find satisfactory enjoyment.Don't think Tibet must be a fantastic place, a paradise where everything is pleasure. Never! Never! Since dissatisfaction and attachment inevitably come with this body and mind, your samsaric mandala of dissatisfaction accompanies you wherever you go. Even if you leave your country and go to a cave in the mountains, attachment comes along. You can't leave it back home.

Trying to face your problems is far more worthwhile than trying to run away from them without understanding their root. You've been that way before; it's not a new trip. It's the same old trip. You go, you change, you go, you change, on and on like that. In this life alone, you've taken so many attachment tops.

With effort, everything is possible. In order to attain the realization of indestructible, everlasting peace, you have to have an indestructible mind for training. Realizations dont' come without your training your mind the right way.  First you have to make the determination., "For a long time I've been a servant to the 2 mental departments of attachment and ego, trying to please them. But in fact they are my greatest enemy, the root of all my problems, the destroyers of all my peace and enjoyment."

You have to understand how these two minds occupy and control your internal world.

As long as you don't realize the enemy within you, you will never recognize that the mind of attachment is the root of all the problems your body and mind experience. All your worries, your depression, everything comes from that. Until you recognize that, even though you may occasionally have an hour's good concentration, it never lasts. If, however you do see the psychological origin of your problems and understand the nature of attachment and how it works to cause aggression, desire and hatred, your mind becomes very powerful.

When you're in a peaceful environment, you think, "Oh, I'm so peaceful, my meditation is so good, I have such good realizations." But when you're out shopping in the streets or in a supermarket and people bump into you, you freak out; because you're not sitting in meditation but walking around, your mind is completely uncontrolled. If, however, if you understand the nature of attachment, and how it lies at the root of your various reactions, you will not freak out easily and will really be able to control your mind, no matter where you go or who you are with.

This is not some philosophical theory, either. It is really true, based on living experience. In fact, all religions recognize the shortcomings of attachment. Even worldly people talk about its drawbacks. But, you know, even though we say the words, "Attachment this , attachment that, " we don't really recognize it as the biggest problem on earth.

Therefore, what I'm saying is, it would be wonderful if you could recognize that your own attachment is the cause of every single problem that you experience. Problems with your husband, wife, children, society, authorities, everybody; having a bad reputation; your friends not liking you; people talking badly about you; your hating your teacher; your lama or your priest; all this truly comes from your own attachment. You really need to check up.

We always have to blame something external when things go wrong. "I'm not happy, so I'd better change this." We are always trying to change the world around us instead of recognizing that it's our own attachment that we have to change.

Just take a simple example. When someone hurts you by telling you that you're greedy, although you blame the person for how you feel, the hurt actually comes from your own attachment. First of all, people, perhaps even your parents or your spouse, don't like your attachment-driven behavior, so they complain., "Oh, you're so greedy," hurting your ego. And then, instead of accepting their pointing out your selfish behavior, your attachment to always being right, perfect, causes you to angrily reject what they say. the fact that your ego, your wrong-conception mind, cannot accept criticism itself is a big problem; your ego wants you to be right all the time, and your attachment creates its own philosophy of never listening to advise, no matter who gives it, closing off your mind. It is very important that you learn to deal with these problems in the best possible way.

~ LAMA THUBTEN YESHE, 1971

"Walk on a trail of loving kindness

Walk on a path of compassion

And all else around you will be beautiful."

Every Blessing

The Race

Twilight, the whale sperm?

If you sometimes feel a lil' useless, offended or depressed.....

always remember that perhaps,

YOU were once the fastest and most victorious lil' sperm out of the millions.

Feel better?

"Walk on a trail of loving kindness

Walk on a path of compassion

And all else around you will be beautiful."

Every Blessing

Silent Beauty That Is Around Us

As I sat in the crowded entrance area of a coffee place today, I found a silent beauty within the incessant noise.

I saw the silent beauty in the two lovers who sat across from where I sat, oblivious to the world with their Vaio lappies, nuzzling with each other, exchanging the occasional deep gazes into each other's eyes. I heard silent beauty in the coos of a baby as her mother tried to keep her entertained in this strange, noisy place. I saw silent beauty in the thoughtful faces of strangers as they contemplated their own journey of life with a cup of fresh brew in their hands. I saw silent beauty in the senior indian gentleman who was seated next to me who offered his seat to a young pregnant chinese woman with Jusco shopping bags in both hands, as she attempted to wave off the offer, without hesitation, he said with a huge grin “I've enjoyed my daily dose of coffee anyway, so now it's your turn!” and proceeded to get up and move about, leaving the seat for her. I saw silent beauty as two mothers exchange smiley Sunday greetings and listen to each others stories of their childrens naughty rants, forming a common bond with each other even though they may not recognize their innate connectivity.

Amidst the daily scene of the mall, where the noise echoed-off the concrete ceilings and reverberated throughout the concourse filled with anxious shoppers, I was overwhelmed by an amazing silent beauty,compounded by the sweet-smelling whiff of brewed java. There was so much beauty in what many perceived as the mundane.

We are surrounded by so much beauty everyday, if only we allow ourselves to see them! To see this beauty we must simply remove negative thoughts and the blinding veil from our eyes. We must transform our minds to all goodness. Open our eyes of positive awareness and wipe away the remnants of our daily-grind slumber that gathers in the corner of our eyes and awake to this world of silent beauty!

Did you see the beauty of today, even if some parts of your thoughts were negatively focused on tomorrow's another possibly blurry Monday?

Are your eyes open or are you still caught within your own self-imposed slumber, blind to the silent beauty which surrounds you?

Be aware now! Be alive! Just BE!

Have a charming week ahead, my dear readers! ^_^

"Walk on a trail of loving kindness

Walk on a path of compassion

And all else around you will be beautiful."

Every Blessing

A Tribute To My Dowager

Another milestone crossed ! Today's a day where the peeps closest and dearest to me celebrate my life. Thank you so very much for all your kind wishes, with some of you guys even making the effort to have wished me twice since TZ omitted to mention that last Friday's dinner was an early surprise. Being woken up from slumber countless times since midnight was for once, pleasant and forgiven. After all, not-so-little-Ant wants to feel loved too, right? ^_^

Today is supposedly a day whereby I spend more than usual; some quality time to myself, whether it involved a lil' pampering, or being away from the office to just simply sit in a quiet corner of a cafe to relax and perhaps contemplate a lil' more on life which would usually involve planning for another milestone.

I chose to be different this year.

Instead, today would be a day of prayers of a very special blessing of peace, love and appreciation to my own Mother, for my very own existance came via the fruits of labour and unconditional love of this truly amazing giver.

One of the toughest jobs in the world, is one which is done 24 hours a day, seven days a week, no vacations, no time-off and you never retire. This job is full of challenges, joy, tears and every possible emotion that a person can feel. It offers the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. This job involves sleepless nights and long days. The skills and tasks for this job change daily. This job requires you to be able to adapt to many situation's at a moment's notice. Each day is a new adventure. You will do much and be thanked little. You will have moments where you receive great appreciation. Oh, by the way, you receive no wages for doing this job, matter of fact, doing this job will involve you spending much of your income. Now, some may ask, who in the world would want this job! There is only one who would, and that is a Mother.

Mother's are a special breed, who often receive little appreciation for what they do day in and day out. A mothers reward is in the hug around the neck, it's a special picture drawn that she can proudly hang on her fridge, it's an orchid plucked from her very own garden which is given in an act of love. It is a smile in the morning and a kiss at night. It is the soft sound of their baby breathing as they drift-off to sleep. It is the pride they feel as they watch their children grow up and do all of the right things. It is their unconditional love to forgive and support when their children falter along the growing up years. This is a short list of the many trials and tribulations and as well as rewards of being a Mother.

I would like to take this opportunity to send peace and love to all of the Mothers of the world. I would also like to take a moment to thank all of the Mother's who are foster Mom's, who open their homes and their hearts to so many children, like those wonderful ladies highlighted in a recent Raya documentary who are selflessly tending to kids in the orphanages.

A special mention to all the wonderful single-parents especially the Fathers who have taken to the motherly role of single-handedly providing for their children, tirelessly donning the apron of love towards the welfare with much toil.

A special blessing of love and peace to all of the women of this world who strongly desire to be a Mother, however are not able to, for I am sure that this celebration of Mothers day can be an emotional day.

For those who are currently in an unfortunate relationship with their Mothers, please do spare a little time to pray for a chance to mend/heal broken hearts and blessings for a brighter future.

Last but not least, I will never be able to give enough thanks to this wonderful, warm, funnily feisty but most of all, most loving woman who blessed me with so much!

I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH MOMMY DEAREST. May the rest of your days be of peace and surrounded with much love.

A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world.

It knows no law, no pity, it dares all things and crushes down

remorselessly all that stands in its path.

~ Agatha Christie

"Walk on a trail of loving kindness
Walk on a path of compassion
And all else around you will be beautiful."
XOXO

The Act of Giving

This post was derived from a recent conversation on "giving" via the meeting of bloggers last Friday (thanks Twilight for bringing up the topic for discussion) plus my recent read of an article in the newspaper that some people who beg for money on the street will often bypass a person who is alone and instead ask for money from a selected "kind-faced" person who is with one or more people. The rationale for this is that the beggar had the belief that a person who is with someone else or is with a group of acquaintances, is more likely to give because they want to be perceived as charitable in front of who they are with by giving rather than look cheap or selfish for not giving. Now, I don't know to what extent this act is believable, however there is something about this that rings true and that is many people give not simply as a self-motivated kind act, not simply to share their abundance however they give because they get something out of it.

There are many times each day in which we have an opportunity to be charitable. We can give of our material wealth, such as to someone in need on the street, to a charity, etc. We give of our time to people who need our time, be that family, colleagues, charities or the person standing in line with us at Starbie.

We can give of our energy and our love.

In any given day, people are frequently giving of themselves. The real question is when you give, are you giving with or without conditions? When you give, is there a price tag attached to your gift, that is, do you expect something in return, or a real practise of loving kindness? Or when you give are you giving because of ulterior motives? Many people give with expectations, often the expectations are manipulative and self-serving.

Many people give because they want something, they may want someone to notice them, to like them more, and they may give to seduce someone into sex or into making some type of deal. A politican gives to attract votes, a businessman gives to advertise and thus enhance marketability of his products.

Some people give because they have come to believe that by giving they will pave their way to heaven, that they will somehow win favors with and be more loved by God and therefore gain entrée into what they perceive to be heaven in the afterlife. Some others give as they believe they will reap huge good karmic values banked-into their "soul/conciousness bank accounts". As you can see, this motivation of giving is still giving with expectations. There is still and expectation associated with the gift that we give, even though that expectation is an expectation of God or the law of karma.

Often times we become frustrated because we feel that our gift was not appreciated or because the gift was not reciprocated. It's to be noticed, to seek and divert attention to oneself "This is my birthday, so you must pay attention to me!". It's all about "ME, ME and more ME!" We have grown into a culture that expects reciprocation for the gifts we give. There are many people who when giving a gift of money, time, energy or love are tuned into their favorite radio station WIIFM (What's In It For Me). These WIIFM fans are often focusing on what they are going to reap out of giving a gift before they even give it.

When we give from our core being, when we give from love there are no expectations tied to the gift. Compassion and loving kindness don't require an audience to acknowledge that we gave of our self. Compassion and love does not expect returns. Love does not give of itself because we believe that it will gain us good karmic returns and favours with God. Love does not keep score of what it is giving or how much it is giving. Love does not give to be manipulative. Love does not give with conditions attached to the gift.

Giving is a natural trait of love and compassion that is the bottom line. When we truly give from the wonderful acts, it is as natural as breathing that is it becomes an unconscious part of how we live. Some may argue that it is not natural if the person is born with a mean-streak. But I sincerely believe we are all born of the same universal essence to love and wanting to be loved. To this sense, I truly believe cultivation of loving kindness and compassion can be cultivated, just as how a cucumbervine can be guided by sticks and fences.

Think today of the many gifts that you give, are they given freely without conditions and without underlying motives or are there price tags on your gifts, are there conditions on your gifts, are your gifts given to manipulate another's behavior? A good way to measure your attachment to the expectations that you have on giving of your gifts is to note the frustration that you feel when your gift is not appreciated or your gift is not reciprocated.

Another good measure of our motivation towards the act of giving could also be derived from the intensity of our action to being charitable. The mere momentary motivation or thought to end the persons suffering without the thought of monetary values attached to it; is by far the most humane act of charity. I always remembered the tale of the lil' boy at Christmas who offered his only penny to charity despite facing the risk of starvation as the most charitable act as opposed to a richman's dropping of a handful of notes into the charity box, which is only a mere drop in the ocean of his material wealth. Many of my friends have deterred me from giving with the reason being "this beggar is part of a syndicate that reaps huge amounts of monies by taking advantage of peoples' compassion". My reply to my friends would just be a simple "charity knows no boundries". Logically, wouldn't we wish that the beggar would collect enough for the day to receive better treatment by whoever is manipulating them?

To sum up, giving of our gifts is one of the most beautiful things we can do. Quoting my idol Mother Teresa "If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one." I encourage each and everyone of us to give. Please do inculcate the joy of being charitable. Charity with conditions is still acceptable, if done with the correct motivation of not being hurt or hurting others. I encourage that you give from love and compassion, and as of today you become more aware of why you are giving for it is never about the gift as much as it is about the intention behind the gift. May you find that the only intention behind your gifts is love.



"Walk on a trail of loving kindness
Walk on a path of compassion
And all else around you will be beautiful."
Every Blessing XOXO