Summer Camp Alternative: How About Learning Other Fundamentals?

No wonder camps have a virtual monopoly on summer! Over at imamother, a mother who is not sending her 8 and 10 year old boys to summer camp is wondering what she can do in terms of learning because her boys are learning mishnayot/gemara in school and she isn't schooled in such subject manner and thus isn't sure what to do (hire a tutor? Send to camp half day?).

It is possible that my own children's Jewish education is severely lacking and that they are so severely behind schedule in terms of Torah learning that this post should be completely disregarded and relegated to the virtual trash bin.

However, if this is not the case and you agree that 8 and 10 years olds should be spending less time (perhaps no time) with their head in a gemara, and more time absorbing some of the fundamentals of Jewish life, mostly through Tanach, then the answer as to what to do is not only a simple answer, but the presentation of a great opportunity to teach (good old fashion) Torah.

Summer is a great time to expand your children's Torah knowledge through a presentation of various subject matter they may never cover in school. Perhaps you can tackle some of the megillot. Perhaps you can learn some of the great books or stories in Nach. Perhaps you can expand upon already learned parshiyot or areas of Torah. Perhaps you can examine some of the tefillah and how it relates to the fundamentals of Torah. If you are insistent on learning an area of Torah that you don't feel competent in, go ahead and grab a sefer with translations and English commentary.

Just because an 8 or 10 year old is learning mishnayot doesn't mean you have nothing to offer said child. In fact, I'd bet that you have plenty to offer the child that is not being offered in school and you put your own stamp on their learning in the meantime.

Cash, Cash Equivalent: Is it really ever appropriate?

Every Chanuakah imamother has threads about "Chanukah Gelt" or gifts given directly from parents to teachers, morot, rebbes, and I promise I'm going to write about it. And then I don't. Next rolls along the next giving season, Pesach, and once again I never get around to the subject.

Well, I was surprised to see the cash gift thread arrive a bit prematurely in regards to Purim and I figured, hey, this doesn't need to be a lengthy post, but it is deserving of a discussion. So in the spirit of not procrastinating (or, perhaps in the spirit of procrastination), I'm going to ask my readership not whether cash or a cash equivalents is the better gift for teachers but to ask:

Is is ever appropriate for parents to give cash gifts directly to teachers who are not your own employees/contractors, but employees of the school that you contract with?

Personally, while I respect the institution of "Chanukah Gelt" (instituted when parents paid the Rebbe directly), "Pesach money," and "I'd like to help out the teacher who probably isn't getting paid much," I don't think it is appropriate to give anything more than a de minimus gift (excuse my tax terminology, 'tis the season). And I'm not really sure what the definition of de minimis is, but from what I understand from friends of mine (who live in a community where the custom is common and who appreciate this custom), certain parents will give well into the 100's, sometimes into the 1000's in gelt.

I have a hard time seeing the custom in its current manifestation as a positive. I believe in paying an appropriate market rate, on time, every time. I pitch in for the class gift, although there are years where I'm tempted to pinch my pennies. But, I see this type of giving as an ethical pitfall. (I will ignore any possible financial pitfalls here).

I do believe some (public) school districts issue guidelines on what type of gifts, if any, may be given. I believe one nearby school district prohibits cash and cash equivalents. If the district sees a personal gift as interfering with proper relationships between the school, parents, and teachers, how much more so in a financially private school market where "cash is king"? I don't want to put out accusations, but many do believe that certain behaviors are ignored because of a parent's stature, do we want our teachers to have to function in an environment where they feel their hands are tied more than they already are? Giving tips in a profession where it isn't normative can be interpreted as bribery of sorts. And, there is the issue of insensitivity to those with less when a gift becomes expected.

So, readers, is cash (or cash equivalents) beyond a "de minimis" amount (which would be hard enough to define) ever appropriate?

The Rest of the Homeschooling Responses

Hate to start asubject line and never finish it up, so below are the other Yated Chinuch Roundtable responses. The most revealing, often insensitive and jaw-dropping responses (e.g. "I can't ever see a reason to homeschool a child") are in my first post: An Epidemic? Do I Detect Some Fear?

Below are the rest of the responses with some comments in [brackets].

Menahel, The Toronto Cheder

The decision to home-school your daughter is a huge, possibly life-changing decision. [As is choosing a school in many cases]. Often, searching parents end up soliciting information from other home-schooling parents, but they may not receive an impartial view from the home-schooling parents, who tend to defend their choices instead of giving accurate pros and cons to home-schooling. [Funny, because in this entire series of responses there hasn't been much reflection --except an insinuation that the parents might want to avoid tuition--as to why homeschooling is a word that is rolling off tongues of yeshiva parents. Might there be some real issues in yeshiva schools that parents are responding too? Social issues? Emotional issues? Family issues? Learning issues? Academic issues? Hashkafic issues? Pedagogic issues? As for homeschooling parents, I've spoken with the Jewish and non-Jewish homeschoolers and the responses regarding their reasons to homeschool and the planned duration are very diverse, ranging from "some time off" to tackle an issue to "we're going for the finish line"]. If you decide to go ahead with the home-schooling and you feel that your daughter is succeeding, it is most likely that you will continue this throughout her elementary years. You shouldn't only consider her situation at this juncture of her young life. It's important to look ahead at the big picture of her life now. [See above. There are no set rules].

There are serveral enticing reasons to home-school a child:
safety
no bullying issues
curriculum is tailor-made according to the child's strengths and challenges
anxiety and stress of homework are non-factors
child's self-esteem remains intact throughout
emotional bond between parent and child is greatly reinforced
can generate stability if a family is going through a transition or ordeal
children are generally well-rested
the obvious fact that a home-schooled child can accomplish more in one day than their peers do in a week at school

[Ahhhhhhh, some reasons, from emotional to academic].

There are also compelling reasons not to home-school a child:

they miss out on all the "extra" and memories that schools provide, including outings with a teacher, extracurricular activities, and healthy competition. Most adults don't remember the actual Gemara or Chumash that they were taught, but they do remember the way it was taught or the time that a rebbi or morah went out of their way for them. [Once again the argument that yeshiva schooling isn't really for the academics. For me, that is what school should be about: laying an academic foundation. And the rest can be supplemented outside the classroom.]

the parents may fancy themselves as great teachers, but in reality they're not. This will impede the child's progress [There are no less than adequate teachers that might be going the same, hence an interest in homeschooling?]

the lack of socialization learning to get along with peers, and understanding a teacher's social cues. Being in school also teaches a child how to succeed even when others are creating adversity, as well as how to interact, discuss and disagree with peers. [Sorry, but I'm stepping onto a soap box. . . I happen to think well facilitated discussion groups are an advantage of school, although that too could be taken into a different venue, but as the person who had to pick up the slack in nearly every, single group that I was assigned to from late elementary school through high school, I don't believe that all of the group work that many teachers love and is so fashionable is at all healthy, Rather than teaching "succeeding even when others are creating adversity." my experience is that the majority of kids learn that they can push off their responsibilities onto others, without penalty, because someone will do the work. Personally I think a lot more character development happens on the sporting field/gym than in the classroom because no one can hit the ball for you, run your leg of the 4*100, or, moving over to another venue, play your trumpet solo or recite your lines in the musical]. In addition, some children will exceed expectations that parents and teachers have of them due to healthy peer pressure. [What of negative peer pressure?]

loss of emotional support other than parents. Many adults credit a particular rebbi or morah with changing their lives. Often, a child needs to have a mentor or confidant other that their parents. Rabbeim/moros can open up topics in ruchniyus or topics within topics, that appeal to the child, which maybe the parent hasn't even heard about [many homeschoolers go work with tutors and Rebbis. And, and issue many schooling parents express is the lack of time (and money) to seek out opportunities that would help their children grow).

Chazal say in Pirkei Avos: "Kol sheruach chachomim nocheh heimenu ruach habriyos nocheh heimenu." Since Yehoshue ben Gamla's time, chadorim have been set up for talmidim. Adults who are most matzliach in life are the ones who are me'urov im habriyos.

A friend related that in his elementary school years, there was an illui in his class who was two years younger than the rest of his classmates. While this boy excelled in learning, he never learned how to communicate properly and it unfortunately affected him as an adult and as a husband and father. [Uh, marriages and parents have issues! Nonsensical argument, besides the boy was in school]. Home-schooling your daughter will cause her to be different and may create issues with her choice of high schools and seminaries later on. [Finally, the crux of the issue: being different]. Since you are blessed with a choice of several schools in you kehillah, choose the one that best suits your daughter's needs. Allow the capable menaheles and moros/teachers to succeed with your daughter along with your encouragement and close contact with the school. [How different are these schools really, as the responses aren't much different].

Hatzlacha.

Dean, Beth Jacob Seminary, Montreal

Your reason for wanting a one year respite from school for your daughter so that she can "benefit from a year away from the social pressures and stress." To me, this implies that you are running away from a problem and hoping that it will go away. Not only will it not go away, but it will fester and, like any other problem not dealth with, it will only grow in reality and in her imagination and will probably multiply itself twofold or more. [What a strange response. Yes, we need to deal with problems, but sometimes getting away from an issue is a starting point, even for adults]

If she is having stress, you must find the reason for that stress and try, to the best of your ability, to alleviate the underlying causes that brought it about. I also do not understand how removing your daughter from her society will remove her social pressures. She can only overcome such social pressures by learning how to deal with others. I also do not agree with you when you say that she will benefit from being removed from the social scene. She must try to understand what is causing the problem and try to minimize it. She may not be able to do it on her own and may need expert held. [If the environment of the school is hefker and the staff is on a different page, it will be near impossible to deal with the issue. I've heard such sad stories (public school stories too) and sometimes a fresh start is the best course. Reading in between the lines I hear the "deal with it" hashkafa which can be vastly inappropriate depending on what you are dealing with).

If one moves one's child from one school to another because the school is more difficult academically than what the child can handle, then I would agree fully with such a move, as one should always try to place one's children in school where they fit academically and where they can grow.

However, social situations are something else. Our children should be taught to get along with all types of people no matter the school. I therefore do not think that taking her out of school for a social reason will solve any of her stressful problems or any of the social pressures.

The only time that I would recommend home-schooling is when there is absolutely no other alternative to any conventional type of schooling. Examples would include living in a community which does not provide the type of hashkafah and education necessary. One of my nieces, who is from a chareidi Yerushalayim background, married a young man from London with a similiar background. They went into the field of kiruv and are living in Capetown, South Africa. Since the schools there do not provide the type of education they need for their children, their only option is home-schooling.

You say that there are several possible schools that your daughter could attend. If that is so, then you should turn over heaven and earth to find a solution to her problem and create a situation where she will be more socially adept. In the long run, the social aspects of conventional schooling are what will be ingrained into her personality. (Oh YES they will!).

More in Part 3, my final post on the subject. I have a lot of saved articles of interest. IF anyone has the letters to the editor section and if any of them address this round table, shoot me an email.

But They Aren't Funding EVERYTHING!

There is a new tuition blog, Yeshiva Sanity, that I'm keeping an eye on. One early post that caught my eye asks "Are WE the Problem?" Well, of course we are the problem and have been since the days of Mitzrayim, but the implied solution, a more centralized funding solution, isn't the real reason why the Catholic Church or the Church of Latter Day Saints can and do provide a low cost education.

As referenced in the article, the Mormon Church subsidizes the cost of attendance at Brigham Young University (BYU) which is practically "free" all things considered at $2,280 for church members and $4,560 for non-members. Yep, a private university with public university pricing even for non-church members. Likewise, the average tuition of Catholic diocese schools averages approximately $3,400 annually, with the actual cost averaging nearly $5,400, a nearly $2,000 subsidy for school attendees.

One might think, wow, if we were only unified, we could provide a more affordable product too: "If only we had the sense of community that the Mormons and Catholics had we would less of a tuition crisis. People whose kids have grown up and have the most means and least expenses would be subsidizing the younger parents who are mostly at the beginnings of their careers and can least afford to pay." [sic]

I fully believe that with greater coordination, savings could be realized, but those who compare us to them with the belief that if we only cooperated that we could come closer to the BYU result are missing something very fundamental: both groups have put their eggs in limited baskets.

I hope I have my information correct, but here is what I have gathered from various sources, including people I've spoken with:

The Church of LDS is highly centralized. Young Mormon students attend Sunday school and there are numerous social activities within the wards (local churches for which membership is assigned based on residence) and temples (regional). Education becomes more formalized in high school as youngsters attend "seminary" which takes place before public schooling. In areas with religious release time, there are paid teachers. In areas with smaller populations, schooling is provided by (unpaid) lay leaders before public schooling hours or through home study groups. While there are some day schools in the Pacific Islands and in Mexico, in America there is no day schooling movement to speak of. Mormon children predominantly attend public schools. Nor is there a subsidized Mormon Camping Movement with its own fundraising, infrastructure, and costs.

Following high school, post-secondary formal Mormon education generally includes a 1-2 year mission for young men and women (and they pay for the privilege, although the church subsidizes the umbrella structure and going on a mission is more popular among the male set). BYU is a popular choice for young Mormon students, but there are also "institutes of religion" serving the single, Mormon ages 18-30. Many of the institutes are located adjacent to college campuses and there are public universities that are highly popular among young Mormons that do not attend BYU or one of the other BYU branches.

From what I can gather, the Mormon Church has put their eggs in a few baskets. The wards and temples provide the K-12 set with Sunday education, Seminary education, and social activities that promote social identification and attachment. The umbrella structure for missions provides young men and women with an opportunity to develop their lay leadership skills. The institutes serve the educational needs and social needs of the young adults. And BYU is the flagship institution, a desirable place for students to attend college for complete immersion and meeting their match (about half the student body is married).

To briefly touch on the Catholic Church, their educational eggs are concentrated on the K-12 through diocese schools. Non-diocese schools can be quite expensive and Catholic Universities cost a fortune, just as other private universities.

Within the Orthodox Jewish world, we have an educational basket for every age bracket from 2 years old on up, and each bracket is subsidized in some way, shape, or form through fundraising, community infrastructure, etc, to say nothing about the expectation that one participate in the non-unified system from the age of 3 on up. We have preschool. We have preschool day camp. We have day school/cheder/yeshiva/bais yaakov. We have day camp. We have sleepaway camp. We have adventure and travel camps. We have boarding high schools for boys and girls. We have the year or two in Israel. We have beis medrash programs. We have social-educational youth group programs. We have outreach programs of every flavor and outreach yeshivot/seminaries. We have Jewish Universities (YU, Touro). We have college seminaries with relationships for degrees within the daled amot. We have Kollels galore. We have community Kollels too. We have shul and yeshiva sponsored avot u'banim and other learning programs. We have kollel dirshu with a stipend. We have learning within shuls with its own infrastructure and adult education institutes with their own corporate structure. (Did I miss any educational program that is supported directly or indirectly with donor money?)

In other words, even if we were to centralize/coordinate our K-12 efforts, we are funding just about everything under the sun and we have a lot of eggs in a ton of baskets. Therefore I don't think we can expect the BYU result at YU.

Shabbat Shalom.

New Low Cost Option: Yeshiva High School in Los Angeles

Wish I had found out about this new school before the open house. But, better late than never, right?

Los Angeles is now hosting a second low cost yeshiva high school option called Yeshiva High School with a tuition of $8000 (the first was Yeshivas Ohev Shalom which had a PSA on this blog in 2010). The mission statement is a big different than other mission statements I've read. It reads: "The Yeshiva High School is intended to serve the greater Los Angeles community and to provide each student with a diverse self-directed, independent education in a safe, supportive and nurturing environment that promotes self-discipline, integrity, motivation, and excellence in learning. We are dedicated to Halacha, Torah Hashkafa, a love of Eretz Yisrael, outstanding academic achievement, and moral conduct. The Yeshiva High School joins parents, community members and businesses to assist student to become self-sufficient, respectful, ethical adults who are successful life-long learners committed to contributing responsibility both in the Jewish and global communities."

You can see the course offering, philosophy, etc on the website. I pulled the tuition from a article in the Jewish Journal that came through my feed.

Blaming Bad Finances on the Girls

I found this comment on imamother which underscores my feeling that the attack against seminary for girls is not actually financial in nature, but is really an attack against Torah education for women.

That said, my DH is acquainted with someone in our community who offers free credit counseling and debt consolidation through a local gemach. He spends up to 20 hours per week helping families figure a way out of credit card debt. Now, I imagined all this credit card debt was a result of everyone running amok at the mall, but DH's friend related something surprising (to me, anyway!). He said that the majority of unmanageable consumer debt owed by families with whom he worked was based on two areas of expenditure: (1) Seminary in Israel for post-high school girls; and (2) Chassunah expenses.

I don't appreciate intellectual dishonesty and this is a prime example.

Never mind that the Orthodox parents have been financing 12 + year of private schooling for both boys and girls. Never mind that a good percentage of young people, especially men (!), don't enter the workplace until their mid-20s with a kid or two behind them. Never mind that long term savings, esp. retirement, is discouraged in favor of and it's-not-a-luxury-any-longer camp. Never mind that many enjoy plenty of luxuries on a regular basis from matching boutique children's clothing to new jewelry in honor of every occasion under the sun to designer strollers. Never mind that a cleaning lady is a regular feature in a a good half of frum households. Never mind over inflated household expenses from store bought prepared food products to flowers. Never mind school pizza lunches.

Nope, the reason for the credit card debt isn't years upon years of over-spending. The reason for the unmanageable debt is those pesky girls going to seminary!

When it is time to get serious about a communal debt problem that menfolk will be addressed and blamed together with the womenfolk.

Lakewood Sensibilities or just plain Sensible?

Chaim of Divrei Chaim writes about a chessed dinner put on through the school (which is is generally pleased with) in which the young teenage girls enjoy a banquet a bid on prizes including things like a manicure, shopping trip to Woodbury Commons, or Shabbos in New Square which starts at $100 per person (take from the comments). Such an event brought him to the passuk "love kindness and walk modestly with your G-d" as being not two values, but a relationship of values. The way of chessed is through modesty (and by that the Navi isn't speaking of clothing measurements alone).

Every once in a while a Orthodox leader or Rabbi decries America materialism, mostly in relationship to the tuition crisis (subject of an upcoming post), yet few seem to blink an eye when schools put on this type of event or go on day trips that many families wouldn't even consider going on themselves. The idea of putting teenagers into a group setting to bid for prizes, prizes that introduce greater luxuries or require more cash outlay, are particularly distasteful to me.

Perhaps adults "need" carrots to guide their giving and make it "palatable" or to attract more attention in the marketplace, but do we need this for children? If we really want to tackle rampant materialism and entitlement (and such come up as regular subjects), the place to start is with some basic sensible chinuch. My 13 year old has no business taking her ma'aser money and bidding on a manicure in order to make a simple donation. . . . and for that matter, I don't need to so either!

A commentator b writes "In December of '05, the BMG Ladies Auxiliary sent out a Chinese Auction booklet that offered prizes that were, by Lakewood standards, extravagant. Rabbi Kotler soon retracted the booklet and issued an apology. Chaim, you have the sensibilities of a Lakewood Yeshiva person. For the rest of us, the reality is that this is a good and efficient way to raise money."

Well, label me a "Lakewood Yeshiva person" if you may, but one need not live in Lakewood or even have a yeshiva education to say, "what in the world is going on here?". I'd label the questioning/opposition as just plain sensible! And I think that "we" are making a major mistake in chinuch with the notion that there need to be a prize for everything.

(On a related note, Jewish schools have a very broad socio-economic spectrum and relatively small numbers of students. I think it important to keep that in mind when planning school related events. A mother-daughter tea at $36+ babysitting if necessary, ski trips, graduation trips, etc all add up and parents of teenagers tell me they can spend upwards of $1000 on the extras in a year.)

Of course, a yashar koach to Chaim B's daughter who was able to ask questions when seeing the event.

Guest Post: The Smart Reader's Kids

In honor of Back to School I present an informative guest post for parents of budding readers from The Smart Reader Blog. Much thanks on your guidance and contribution to my blog! Check out The Smart Reader Blog please (see sidebar for the link also).

I often get requests for book recommendations for children; nowadays it's so difficult to find books for kids that have literary merit. Another issue is the fact that one doesn't want one's children picking up, say, bad language from the books he/she is reading. It's also hard to pinpoint which books reflect the values one is trying to inculcate in one's family.

Although this may sound like a pain in the neck, I pre-read nearly every book my children take out from the library. This isn't really as hard as it sounds, because I spent most of my childhood reading every book in existence; it only remains for me to read the newer ones. Also, I read faster than the average person (practice makes perfect! Read Malcolm Gladwell's if you don't believe me.

In this post, I offer a short list of recommended reading for emerging readers and onward. If you are looking for good books in a particular genre for your child, you can request those in the comments and I'll do another post later this month.

Emerging readers: These are the children who are just beginning to read on their own and are moving beyond read-aloud; there is usually a special section in the library for these readers. Unfortunately, each publisher has its own leveling system, so it takes some time to figure out what is what, but you can't go wrong with:

• Dr. Seuss; Cat in the Hat and Green Eggs and Ham are perfect for young independent readers.
• Arnold Lobel's Frog and Toad
• David Adler's Young Cam Jansen, and when they are ready they can move on to the regular Cam Jansen series.
• I was very fond of Amelia Bedelia when I was very young; I've noticed, however, that today's children often don't grasp the double meanings of the words the way we used to. A lot of those words are not in common use today, and it just doesn't seem as funny. Take them out anyway; it's worth a little bit of explanation.

Intermediate readers: These are children who read well on their own, and can deal with real chapter books that have lots of words. The subject matter is usually straightforward and the plot is generally uncomplicated. Vocabulary is on or slightly above level.

• I don't really like series books, but this one is actually not bad (although it's a tad commercial for my taste). The American Girl books, with each series focusing on a child growing up during a particular era in American history, are nicely done, well-written, and comfortingly predictable. The values are quite nice, and each book features an appendix that tells the reader more about the period in history. If you can restrain yourself from purchasing any of the merchandise, you should be fine. The authors vary. These are usually most suitable for ages 7-10.
• A good author for children ages 8-11 is Eleanor Estes; her Moffat family series is charming and funny. Other good authors for these ages are Elizabeth Enright, whose '50's era books are all now being reprinted, and Edward Eager. Eager is an E.Nesbit wannabe, and for those of you who have never heard of Nesbit, she was an English children's author who was very well known and is still widely read. I would recommend her books to older children, though, because the language is quite British, if you get my meaning.
• Laura Ingalls Wilder's books are a good place to start for a girl who is ready for a book that is a bit longer. The series officially begins with Little House in the Big Woods, and moves onward. The last two might not be appropriate to children younger than 11 or 12; the last book is actually a bit tragic.
• Andrew Clements skyrocketed to fame with his bestseller, Frindle, and seems to have been consistently churning out entertaining novels since then. I particularly enjoyed A Week in the Woods, as well as Room One. Parents should be aware, however, that Clements also published several Young Adult books that are not targeted to this age level.
• One thing (out of many) that is appealing about her books is how they are so suited both to boys and girls. Ramona is a character girls love and boys find hilarious. Ralph S. Mouse has universal appeal.
• Noel Streatfeild was a great favorite of mine growing up. Her "Shoe" books (Ballet Shoes, Dancing Shoes, Theater Shoes) are endearing and beautifully written.

Older and advanced readers: Children aged 11 and over are often looking for books with more complex plots, abstract themes, that don't unfold predictably. However, this age and level is difficult because much of the fiction marketed to this group depicts values and behaviors parents don't want their children immersed in. Here I offer a short list of some suitable reading material, but it is very important here to know what your child can handle, and what you do/do not want him/her exposed to.

• Zilpha Keatley Snyder: One of my favorite books, even now, is Snyder's Velvet Room. One of her several books set against the backdrop of the Great Depression, Snyder's story carries a lesson but does it so gently that the reader delights in learning it. I didn't love all her books, but she's definitely an author to acquaint yourself with.
• L.M. Montgomery was the creator of Anne of Green Gables and published oodles of similar books. There's no real middle ground with Montgomery -- either you love her or she sickens you.
• Newbery Medal books: Click on this link to get a full listing of all the Newbery winners I have read and reviewed.

If you post your requests in the comments section for this post, I will take up this thread in my next post as well. For example, if you have a child who likes fantasy, or mysteries, I would be happy to publish a separate post for that genre.

Be sure to check out my quasi-kid post on this page.

Simply Don't Understand the Response

Earlier this year I posted a PSA for the West Orange Cooperative Yeshiva (WOCY) which was slated to open this coming September. The WOCY had rented a facility, hired staff, and enrolled students.

Recently, the Cooperative announced that some enrolled students flew the coop and the school would no longer open. Clearly, such is a risk in any small school.

What I can't understand is after renting a facility, hiring staff, and enrolling students, only to see the project collapse, how this can be the press release:

The West Orange Cooperative Yeshiva achieved an incredible goal of enticing the local yeshivot to match and even beat our tuition rates for many West Orange students this year. This is a wonderful accomplishment and really why we began this endeavor.

Based on this information which came from some of our student body as well as other prospective families, it became clear that there was minimal need for us to continue. More and more families that were interested in our school started signing at wonderfully reduced tuition rates that they were not offered in the past. In lieu of this, we will not be opening this year and fully expect the tuition assistance to continue in the future.

We are very thankful to our local yeshivot for recognizing the tuition crisis and reacting in a way that helps the community at large

.

While is is quite nice for the parents who wanted to only pay $XXXX, that they are now able to pay $XXXX (for school year 2011-2012) in the school of their choice, such cannot be why a school is organized. And what of minimal need? These are kindergarten students; students with 12 more years of schooling ahead of them. Are the established schools going to continue to offer reduced tuition for many years to come when there is no competition, and no real threat of competition because they can now call the parents' bluff?

And, where is the yashrut? There were staff that committed themselves to the school. And surely not every parent flew the coop. What of those parents who didn't intend to be looking for another arrangement in the 11th hour? What of sincere parents down the road who might like to form a co-op but will not be taken seriously should they try?

I simply don't see the silver lining here. But, perhaps someone will explain it to me.

Why Does it Cost So Much to Educate a Jewish Child?

Hat Tip goes to the first read who pointed this out in the comments of the previous post. Thank you R. Mordechai Scher. There were many more who emailed me privately. Thank you to all. Clearly this article is making the rounds.

So, "Why Does it Cost So Much to Educate a Jewish Child?" Rabbi Teitz offers an eye-opening analysis, and an analysis that leaves me to conclude that cost cutting simply isn't going to come from above.

First, the "kitzur" of the article about what costs drive school budgets, and then some of my own thoughts (and your comments):

Staffing and Salaries are the majority of the budget. Educators make a school. Salaries are set by the market and schools compete with each other for top staff, staff driving costs upwards. Cost cutting in this area will drive great educators from the field. Talented educators will choose other fields. If key staff is not maintained, parents to take their dollars elsewhere. Even where population fluctuates, staffing needs maintained for the most part to offer a consistent product. Cutting class size will impact instruction. How significant the impact would be depends on the teacher and students. Cut class size and parents might leave. Where genders are separated, the population might not be big enough to increase class size anyways. Very few school run at capacity as it is. There is a point where annual increases aren't reasonable. Limudei kodesh teachers are reaching that level. There are some unrealistic expectations of remuneration when it comes to administrative salaries.

Special Education Special education basically didn't exist 40 years ago. Now we educate children with special needs and it costs a lot of money. JEC spends nearly $1.5 million, 12% of the budget, on "resource room" alone.

Social Workers Forty years ago there were no social workers, today the author's school has 3 plus other guidance staff. Can this be cut? No. There are too many culture influences kids are being bombarded with. ("And this is why public school simply can not be an option.")

Extras The challenge every school has it determining what is a need and what is nice to have. The philosophy is that we want each student to feel good about coming to school. We could save money on sports, music, and art. But the budget wouldn't be cut significantly and it would make a lot of students miserable. Perhaps these students will act out. Excursions could be dropped, but students look back at those fondly.

Technology Listed as needs are computers in every classroom. They don't need to be the latest, but they do need to be up-to-date. Parents see the increased technology as a need at this point, and parental expectation drives costs.

Competition Schools need to offer what other schools do or they will lose students. Reducing student population means increased tuition for the remaining families. You can't win this one. Some might argue that creating a nurturing environment should be the purview of shuls, not schools. This would only transfer costs.

Administration The author won't say that some layers of administration aren't necessary, but argues there is more need than people will admit. His argument is that if a principal of a 400 student school were to give each student 5 minutes of time a week, this would consist of 33 hrs and 20 min, or nearly a full time job, hence the greater need for administration.

Kodesh For schools that only teach limudei kodesh in the morning, the challenge becomes how to offer a full-time job if the teacher cannot cross the divide into chol, and most cannot. The same challenge is not shared on the limudei chol side as public school teachers and administrators (!) look to supplement their income. To attract quality teachers for a half-day work, "full-time jobs must be created for them. And from that necessity was born the coordinator. Not an administrator, but something beyond just the classroom instructor; more pay, but not at an admiration's level. And hiring one person to do the myriad of tasks of the coordinators won't really be that much less expensive, plus it would not address the attraction and retention issue." The Rabbi does leave open a possibility of cost cutting here, as he states that when budgets are tight, mid-level jobs have to be redistributed and positions eliminated.

My thoughts (excuse me as I reminisce out loud while offering some thoughts):

The Rabbi's article was not a brainstorm about how to cut costs, but rather what schools are spending on ("why it costs so much"), and how competition plays a large part in determining what money is spent on. Reading in between the lines, the brainstorm is depressing. A demanding parent body in an out-of-pocket education system transforms us into our own worst enemies. Rationality, as Rabbi Scher point out in the article's comments, is not at play here. (With all the ills of a bloated public education system, it seems there is more promise there to control costs). Add that to the admission that jobs were "created" and I'm not sure we can actually lower costs much. We all know that it is far easier to hire than fire, and that once an expense is deemed necessary, cutting back is near impossible.

What the article really is, to me, is a study in how education has changed. I'm not convinced the product is better for all the changes.

I wish I knew what Jewish education looked like before social workers and resource rooms. I'm guessing it looked a lot like my elementary school. There we had 1 principal, a gentle, but firm man named Mr. G. . . . . As I recall, there was a secretary in the administrative area (maybe 2), as well as the school nurse. Come to think about it, in the 3 years I was at that school, I probably only visited the administrative area 5-6 times, mostly to see the school nurse. My recollection of education back in the day was that administration pushed papers and reviewed staff. I recall the principal spending a morning in my classroom each year. I don't believe that principals were expected to interact with each students, certainly not 5 minutes a week, nor were they expected to be hooked up to their blackberries texting with parents! On the contrary, being called into the principals office was scary, and you simply didn't see the principal much.

I recall being called into the principal's office in the 1st grade. Boy, was I scared. The call followed a lunchroom altercation. I was shaking in my fake Keds when I arrived. The visit was short and sweet. Mr. G said to me, "You aren't in trouble. So don't be scared." He then let me know that R was sent home for the day, this wouldn't happen again, and that the nurse would help me wash and dry my shirt so I could wear clean clothing. Thank G-d for fast drying polyester blends. I was back in my panda bear sweatshirt with purple sleeves in no time.

We didn't have social workers in every school to deal with R's problems. There were school psychologists, shared across the district, but none dedicated to any one school. What we did have was p'ed off parents (excuse my language), i.e. parents whose schedules were disruptive to deal with their unruly child, or take a child home midday. I don't want to glorify what was, because there was plenty of bad behavior to go around. But I do think there is a break down in authority and I also believe few kids today get knots in their stomach thinking of what will happen if Dad finds out.

I wonder if administrator duties have changed in public schools today. Today (private Jewish), I see the principal meeting and greeting parents and students in carpool line. And I do believe the students have quite a bit of interaction with the principal (I can't quite recall ever meeting with the principal in the other elementary school I attended). In Yeshiva high schools, I know administrators also teach classes and students spend quite a bit of time with them as there is a more "open door" policy.

Other things we didn't have in elementary school: regular phys ed, art, or music (except for 5th grade band which was totally optional and I'd say about half the class didn't participate. . . I was a non-participant as my parents thought I was better off concentrating on the extracurricular I had already committed too and didn't want me pulled out of class. When band was an elective class, I was allowed to join). I recall a shared P.E. teacher visiting a few times in upper elementary. It wasn't particularly enjoyable. Instead of hitting the soccer field or jumping rope, we had to play organized volleyball. I was about 3 feet too short for that and my serve hit the net if I was lucky. We didn't get much exercise just standing there. There was a shared choir teacher who came around the holidays (I asked to be excused). There was a shared art teacher who came around from time to time. I have no particular recollection pleasant or unpleasant. For the most part, teachers enriched according to their interests. I could have done without one interest. On the other hand, one teacher taught us double-dutch during recess.

One comment (highlighted above, and quoted here in full) really stands out to me. Not for what it says, but for what it doesn't say: "And even those families who are firmly committed to Jewish education still need their children in a nurturing Jewish environment, inside and outside of school. One could argue that this should be the purview of the shuls and not the schools. True enough, but it would only transfer the cost." [Warning: about to step into seriously politically incorrect territory] The expectation is that children must be fully nurtured by the community. Hence the growing demand for social workers, programming, etc. What about transferring some of the responsibility to parents? I guess that boat has sailed. After all, when tuition bills reach into the five, and even six, figures, parents have to outsource these things and schools need to compete. And after paying tuition, there isn't much energy, time, or money left for outside enrichment.

As for the increase in special education services, this is a very touchy area. Over the years, I've read letters from parents that are accusatory in nature. I've never touched the subject here because it is like a hot potato. I feel for parents who are have children that with greater needs, but I simply don't see how private school can accommodate all needs out there with their current resources. It is quite possible too much has been bitten off as it is (see the note about 12% of the budget on resource room alone). There is something unpleasant about being told "we" aren't doing enough, when things are what they are.

In the comments, Rabbi Berger makes a very provoking comment on special education: "Next, speaking as a father who spent years paying for Bridge Classes for a number of children, as well as a child who has Downs…. There is Special Ed and Special Ed. It’s one thing to provide yeshiva education for children who are labeled things like ADD, ADHD, dyslexic… these are critical members of society who the next generation cannot function without. There is also Special Ed like my son with Downs requires. Is his daily yeshiva a communal need or a want? From a straight and admittedly brutal triage perspective, will we pay for one special child to get a basic Jewish education or take that money to pay for over a dozen mainstream or several learning-disabled children? An adult with Downs is not likely to head off the derekh just because his Jewish education is in Sunday School or an after-school program. Real cost cutting will require making those hard decisions, and our unwillingness to face them makes it impossible to make ends meet.."

I will leave my thoughts at that. Personally I'm not convinced smaller classes, more competitive pay, and more everything has created a more enviable product. But, so long as others think it has, the cycle will continue.

This is far too lengthy and I need to get to work to pay tuition :)

Two More School Closings

There is something terribly sad about schools closing so close to the upcoming school year. My heart goes out to the parents and student who must now regroup so unexpectedly.

Bat Torah Girls High School of New Jersey announced they will not be reopening their doors this fall. As per the article, the scales were tipped when a few students moved schools.

The Twin Cities Chabad boys high school that reported financial troubles, one issue being that not one student paid full tuition. The school just announced that they will not be reopening in September, but they are planning a campaign with hopes to reopen in 2012. This past school year, there was only one student paying the full fare of $19K, which includes room and board.

There isn't much economic commentary to offer that hasn't already been offered. Smaller schools are particularly vulnerable to even the loss of a few students. The institution(s) in smaller communities are particularly vulnerable as a whole to losing even a few students.

It is the Way of Men to Pursue Women!

Rabbi Pruzansky of the Rabbi Pruzansky blog has written a column has simply blown me out of my seat: Dating Self-Help. While I do see many merits of 'shidduchim', I have long felt that the manifestations of such has simply emasculated the male population. And, I don't think it's done much for the fairer half either. The rejection of the natural, i.e. men pursuing women in hopes of marriage and building a family, along with any other practices designed to save children and adults from rejection, potential embarrassment, feelings of being different, what have you, have left us weakened when it comes to simply dealing with life and everything life hands to us.

The article is a must read, so head on over to the Rabbi's blog. Following are a few key quotes. I like that the Rabbi doesn't beat around bush and I like that in the concluding paragraph he connects the idea of molding more assertive men to more confident women. Such a cultural change would make forums like this obsolete!

The Gemara (Kiddushin 2b) cites the pasuk “When a man takes a woman [in marriage]” and explains “darko shel ish l’chazer al ha-isha,” it is the way of men to pursue women [in marriage]. It is not the way of men, or shouldn’t be, to enlist a band of agents, intermediaries, and attorneys to do the work for them. By infantilizing and emasculating our males, we have complicated a process that should be simpler and made a joyous time into one of relentless anguish and hardship for many women.

In the realm of dating and marriage, we are breeding Ohn [Korach's original co-conspirator whom was saved by his wife] by the thousands by freeing men from their obligation to pursue their potential spouses, and thereby relegating women to the dependent role of passively waiting to be the chosen one. Why do we do that, and is there a better option ?

Some will argue that the shidduch system spares our children the pain of rejection – but part of life, and a huge part of parenting, is preparing our children for a world in which they will experience rejection at some point. That is called maturity.

Something is not normal, and against human nature as Chazal perceived it, for men to be so diffident, so timid, so Ohn-like, and sit back comfortably relying on others to procure them dates. Young men who would not allow others to choose for them a lulav and etrog do not hesitate to delegate others to find them a spouse.

As well-meaning as the system intends, it must be demeaning and deflating – worse than even the rejection that happens after casual encounters.

As a community we have other options than the false choice of isolationism or promiscuity, and we need to strengthen our young men with the inner confidence to guide their own lives. There are too many people walking around with Y chromosomes who are not men

May Hashem bless with success the work of all shadchanim. But we need to shift the culture away from the passive indifference of the well-connected to the active pursuit of spouses by all, and thereby mold more assertive men and more confident women. That is because more is expected of us – as a nation that is called by G-d for greatness not mediocrity, to be active not passive, to be followers of G-d and leaders of mankind.

Readers, besides shidduchim, what other practices of modern day parenting and modern day chinuch do you see as emasculating men and creating wall flower women?

Boys Will Be Boys

It is nice to see that this yeshiva is working on the issue of boys from the school jumping fences, going onto the rooftop, and breaking the neighbor's windows. And perhaps the surveillance cameras will do the job (so the boys can be expelled) . . . . .

But, pardon me for having an opinion, but this entire approach to raising boys of "boys will be boys"---therefore we shouldn't give them a proverbial kick in the tuchus from the get go, lay down the law, and follow through with consequences when the behavior pattern has yet to be ingrained into the psyche--is completely flawed approach, and one I continually run into. I've heard this excuse too many times from neighborhood parents and educators. And I protest!

Bad behavior (especially behavior that violates the basic foundation of Torah--i.e. do not destroy other people's stuff) should never get a free pass. Many of our boys* need more exercise, more space to run around in, an educations better suited for their energy. But when you get to the point of vandalism and even having to install surveillance video, a generation of young men has been failed. Expulsion is a band-aid after parents and educators haven't done their jobs. What a pity.

We demean boys (read: future husbands and fathers) when we write off their behavior to their gender and give them a free pass--only to let that behavior hurt them later--rather than embracing their characteristics and channeling them appropriately.

*and girls too for the record

Guest Post: Accreditation, Track Records, and the Degree for Which You Don't Need to Step Foot

Thank you to my Guest Poster for helping me keep this blog active. I have a lot of thoughts I want to share that are not of the usual Orthonomic material, but then again the events are usual Orthodox events. More to come.

Guest Post by

A. Former Bochur

A couple of years ago, an entrepreneurial individual published The Bochur’s Guide to College (For Women Too) www.bochursguide.com. Ostensibly, it is a in informational resource which according to one review on Amazon offers “a very informative and helpful overview of the options available for those seeking to obtain a degree in a non-conventional way…. outlines different ways to obtain credit ranging from exams (CLEP, AP, and others) to online and distance learning. A fun read too!”.

The website features links to Amazon to purchase book as well as links to various online degrees from for-profit institutions which are apparently generating advertising revenue.

It is beyond the scope of this post to discuss the merits or demerits of the compatibility of a Torah observant lifestyle and the contemporary college campus. The fact is that secular college campus is in part reason of how we have gotten to this point.

The topic at hand is the value of having a college degree and how to obtain it. Most (although not all) frum Jews will stipulate the value of having a degree towards some sort of vocational endeavor. The question is how to get there.

In the past, the American Yeshiva world has been replete with success stories, either in business or professional life. While some have been able to excel in business without a degree, many Yeshiva graduates attended night school at commuter colleges that were the springboard towards a professional employment in a variety of professional fields. For the most part, all believed that obtaining a college education was a necessary component. This was achieved through an arrangement with the college to accept some number of Yeshiva credits, but ultimately the undergraduate degree was a diploma from the college of record. Some took this diploma to graduate school, and others were able to enter the workplace with the undergraduate degree and lead fine religious lives infused with Torah values and learning, and the ability to make an honest living.

Phase II of this Yeshiva world phenomenon occurred when it was discovered that for fields like Law, there was no specific major that was a prerequisite for entry. As a result, the “Yeshiva degree” was invented. Ostensibly, this was to turn years of Torah study into some sort of diploma which would be subsequently accepted by the law school. For Law, there has been a strong track record of success for this path. A variant within Phase II included other professional fields such as Accounting for which prerequisites and passing the CPA became more important than the undergraduate degree. As a result, the Yeshiva degree plus the coursework in Accounting could be leveraged to obtain the professional credential.

Enter Phase III, which is really a mish-mosh of Yeshiva (or Seminary) degrees, online degrees, “CLEPing“at both the undergraduate and graduate levels. Young people and their parents have be told that some of these degrees are “accredited” and therefore worth the investment. There are a variety of different drivers of this phenomenon, which are also too complex for this post.

A perusal of the website above will list the various programs from which one can obtain a degree, there is little accountability for what is being advised. And the types of degrees being promoted here are very much the same approach that some Yeshivas are publicizing as channels in which one can get a college degree with minimal time and coursework and maximum time learning in the Yeshiva.

Without getting into the ins-and-outs of what is “accreditation”, let’s just compare it to some sort of Kosher symbol. OK, someone claims that it is kosher, and perhaps it technically is under certain circumstances. But is it a reliable hashgacha that most would recognize? In the same way, OK the degree is accredited, but is it recognized by employers? Another question that people should be asking is what is the value of the diploma alone without any relevant job experience, and in many cases writing and social skills within the corporate workplace.

It should be pointed out that many of these modern day diploma mills are in reality for-profit entities which are often more expensive than the local college. So, in the end, is this a worthwhile investment? Sure, the claims are that one can complete the degree in half of the time as other recognized schools. But so what? Most established universities track employment rates of graduates (one can quibble with how accurate the numbers are, but there is some tracking going on?). But are the Yeshivas doing that for the programs which they are directing people to?

The most recent one is the following (but there are others which have been marketed over the years).

*MEMO: To All Yeshiva Rabbinic Degree holders (First Talmudic Law or First Rabbinic Degree etc...)*

The Jewish Community announces the fourth cohort in the most successful M.B.A. Degree program starts again on *June 14th, 2011*. *(Participants meet twice a week for only 6 weeks, the rest of the pro**gram is completed via correspondence and can be done from any location)*

*

*The Introduction Seminar is Tuesday, June 14th *

***Students must register at least two weeks before then*

This Masters in Business (M.B.A.) program has *an additional **$2,000reduction OFF

**the discounted tuition of $8,100*. *(Total M.B.A. tuition would be $6,100

....paying class by class as you go and financial aid is also available.).*

- There are only 12 physical sessions on Tuesday and Thursday evenings that take place in Brooklyn or Queens *(students meet twice a week for 6 weeks), *

- *The rest of the program is completed **entirely online*.

- M.B.A. Graduate Degree Specifics:

https://sites.google.com/site/teameducationinc/ellis-university-mba/course-specifics>

- Schedule and Calendar:

*LINK*

- *Read what current students are saying about the program:*

- Past student comments:

* LINK

*

- *6 different concentrations are available:*

- *M.B.A. - **General*, * *

- *M.B.A. - **Finance*, *

*

- *M.B.A. - **Information Management*,

- *M.B.A. - **Pharmaceutical Marketing and Management*, * *

- *M.B.A. - **Project Management*,

- *M.B.A. - **Entrepreneurship*

- *Financial Aid is also available*

** You can use your *Traditional *or *Yeshiva** Degree* for entry. Students have the option of earning your M.B.A. in 13-15 months if you desire.

Please call with any questions.

Sincerely,

Aaron Braunstein

*Program Director*

*(516) 528 - 8871

(347) 560 - TEAM*

*Teacher Education Assessment & Management*

Program Director

www.GoTeamEd.com

Office: (888) 418-GRAD

I would encourage all readers of the post to write or call the fellow asking him some of the following. Can he produce some statistics as to the value of this program at “Aspen University” or “Ellis University” for employment in the Tri-State area for example? How many graduates have obtained jobs in the past 3-5 years? Without any relevant work experience, what is the value of the diploma in the marketplace? What is the average salary of a newly minted MBA from these programs? How do corporate recruiters react to these schools on a resume and how do they stack up with local brick-and-mortar MBA degrees? How many graduates have obtained employment without any relevant job experience? Does this person stand to gain a commission for each referral to sign up? All good questions, each begging for a compelling answer.

We have a concept of “lifnei iver” which can loosely be translated as dispensing irresponsible advice to those who might be uninformed, naïve, or vulnerable. Those out there should probe as to how credible those making any referrals to these programs really are, whether made by the person above or the head of your local Yeshiva that endorses such a program. Can the value of these short-cuts be corroberated by hard (or even soft) evidence?