November - A Month of Monumental Moments for Marci

On my drive home from work last night, I found myself contemplating all of the huge moments that have taken place, in my life, in the month of November.

A few of them, in chronological order:

1) November 28, 1976: My parents' wedding date! I certainly wouldn't be here without this celebration :)

2) November 4, 1984: The date upon which I "skipped" first grade. I had been in first grade up until that point, but, following months and months of testing and being removed from my classroom, I finally officially entered the second grade. I acclimated easily, both socially and academically, but the true ramifications took years to appreciate. The classmates I "left behind" never really forgave me, and our friendships were strained from then on. I was always younger, and always had to explain why, which became a source of shame (the usual response from the other person was, "Oh, so you're smart or something?"). I wasn't able to feel comfortable with the skipping, on a deep level, until rabbinical school, when I was no longer the youngest person in my class. However, even now, as a rabbi, I am still dealing with being perceived as a "baby rabbi." I am in no rush to be older, at least now, but for years I felt like I had to rush everything.

3) November 11, 1995: The night of the "Screw Your Roommate" Dance at Brandeis, during my freshman year of college. Met my college boyfriend/fiance that night, fell in love, and dated him for the next five years. Learned so much about myself throughout. We split up during my second year of rabbinical school (and never married). Realized that I was most comfortable "mothering" someone, but that this wasn't fair to myself or to the other person. Began to search for a relationship that would allow me to be an equal, and to be cared for by the other person as much as I want to care for my partner.

4) Thanksgiving, 2001: The time during which I traveled out to Arizona to visit one of my best friends, Todd, who later passed away in 2002. The days were idyllic, surrounded by the Southwest US in autumn. Visited the Grand Canyon, Sedona, Flagstaff (Route 66!!), and celebrated Thanksgiving with my family in Phoenix. It was a helpful way to heal from the horrors of 9/11. I will always treasure those precious days.

5) November 7, 2004: As I mentioned a few posts ago, this was the date of my car accident, an ordeal that finally culminated in my successful spinal surgery in December, 2007.

6) November 21, 2009: The date upon which I will fly out to California to visit an old OSRUI friend of mine, Mike. Totally excited to see him, catch up, and enjoy some California sunshine. My first official vacation starting work at my new synagogue. By the way, Mike is a HILARIOUS, TALENTED film critic (in addition to his many other skills - directing, editing, composing, acting, singing, etc.), and you can watch his entertaining reviews on each week's biggest films.

Guess November is, in general, a pretty good month for me :)

Girls on Pop: Everyone Loves a Rabbi

One of my bestest friends, Brooke Tarnoff, is a writer of PopEater, a really fun AOL pop culture website. (Brooke and I were partners-in-crime in college, and we wrote some of the best sketch comedy in the history of the world. Really.) She makes these fabulous podcasts with a group of cool gals who talk all things pop. In the latest episode, Brooke name-drops me throughout! The title, "Everyone loves a rabbi," refers partly to me! Apparently, I need to be giving out "Rabbi Relationship Advice." Crazy!! Check out the video below (I get mentioned around the 15:00 mark).

Blogosphere Extravaganza, Part II

While I was in Chicago, I had a chance to spend time with another wonderful friend, both in the blogosphere and out, Rabbi Phyllis Sommer at Ima on (and off) the Bima: Real-life Jewish Parenting. Though we weren't at the same campus for rabbinical school (our seminary has three US locations - New York, Cincinnati, and Los Angeles), we first met as students at a national conference on conversion (held in beautiful Denver, Colorado).

When she was ordained in 2003, she wound up at a synagogue in the Chicago area. I was ordained in 2004 and stayed in New York City for my first pulpit. Through the joys of the world wide web, we have been able to stay in touch. Plus, my brothers have both worked as songleaders at her synagogue over the past few years, so most of my mishpachah (Hebrew for "family") knows her and her family.

So good to see you, Phyllis! Hope to see you again soon!!!

Chanukah in Chicago 2008 - A Blogosphere Extravaganza, Part I

Hi, all!

I have lots to tell you, and some more fun pictures to share. I had such a wonderful time in Chicago, visiting friends and family, and I had a chance to visit with some good friends from the blogosphere!

First up - a Chanukah party! I was home for such a relatively short time, and I wanted to see so many lovely people, so why not throw a party?!? I invited a bunch of friends from high school and from my days at Olin Sang Ruby Union Institute camp (the best Jewish overnight camp in the world, if I do say so myself). Unfortunately, my school friends weren't able to come, so it turned into a mini-camp reunion, with a sing-a-long, grab bag present exchange, and lots of yummy food. AND, one of my camp friends happens to be a blogger, too - your friend and mine, Bradley Egel from The Egel Nest.

Here's Bradley, with his sister, Susan. They are both SO GREAT - I feel like our families are cut from the same cloth. I wish we could all hang out more often - darn that 700 miles between Chicago and New York!

My brother, Ricky, and me - we had such a fun time preparing for the party, and he was in charge of the "artistic vision" of the shindig :)

My adorable parents - they were so thrilled to be with everyone, and they sang along with every song. Thanks for being so wonderful, Mom and Dad!!


A shot of the song session - we sang camp songs, Indigo Girls ("Galileo" and "Closer to Fine," of course!). Bradley's son, Sammy, was shaking a tail feather in the middle.

A marvelous time was had by all - hooray!!

New Kids Concert Recap!

I attended the NKOTB concert at the IZOD Center in East Rutherford, NJ, with three friends. We were all fans 20 years ago, and couldn't believe that we were going to see Danny, Donnie, Joe, Jon, and Jordan in concert again! With me was Hope, Eve, and Lori. We made our own shirts...
...And, as you can see, we put our names on the back of each one!! It was so hard finding a place that still did "iron-on" lettering, but I found the one place in Manhattan that does it. I had a great time with the owner at Gifted, the only place that does lettering!!

Here, I had to take a private moment with a huge picture of Jordan Knight, my favorite. Excuse me while I make a kissy-face at him. Oy, he is still so sexy......
The five guys, in concert. They were so fabulous - still great performers, dancers, and singers. And, they were total mensches about the whole thing - they were so appreciative of us fans!

What a fun time!!!!

The Gays of our Lives

(Lindsay, Justin, Michael, Me)

"Like sands through the hourglass...."

Two of my dearest friends, Justin and Michael, came to town to visit last weekend. Michael is a friend from college - we did tons of theatre together over the years at Brandeis. During my senior year, he met Justin, and the two have been a couple ever since. They celebrated nine years together recently, and they are getting married in two weeks!! Though neither of them are Jewish, they have asked me to bless them during the wedding (though I am not officiating at the actual ceremony). I am so honored, and I am still working on what I am going to say. I just hope that I can get through it without crying!! No matter what, I will be sure to report on the wedding shortly thereafter.

In this picture, one of their friends, Luciano, joins Justin in making art. We call this one, "How do I love thee? Let me count the gays...."

In this shot, I was getting ready to complete my grandest aria yet! They inspire me, I tell you.

Hope all is well with you guys!!

My visit to the Egel Nest

(Pictured: Back Row - Bradley Egel, his brother-in-law, Tom;

Middle Row: Bradley's Beautiful Wife, his Sister Sue, ME!;

Front Row: Sammy Egel, and Bradley's nephew, Zach)

Those of you who have visited Bradley Egel's blog, "The Egel Nest," have gotten to know him, the Beautiful Wife, and their WONDERFUL son, Sammy. (And if you haven't visited yet, please be sure to drop by - it's one of the most entertaining blogs out there!).

Well, it turns out that Bradley is an old OSRUI camp friend of mine, and I was able to visit him and his family while I was in Chicago. Bradley's sister, Sue, is also an old camp friend, and she wound up marrying a high school friend of mine (such a small world!!). They have a baby, Zach, and the seven of us had a blast.

You can visit his post about our visit (titled "Marci...Boku," isn't that great?!?!) and also take some time to tour his blog.

(As a P.S., I really wanted to visit another friend, in the real world and blog world, Phyllis, but she was out of town at a camp retreat at OSRUI, with my brother. Next time, Phyllis!)

Man plans, God laughs...

Well, my friends, so much for planning ahead - we never made it to the Mermaid Parade. Actually, to be more precise, we made it to where the parade was being held, but never found parking. After about 45 minutes of circling throughout the joy that is Coney Island, NY, we gave up.

During the drive, and the circling, we laughed SO HARD! We were all in "good form," coming up with hilarious comments, movie quotes, funny voices, and perfectly timed reactions. I had a good mix on my iPod, so the music was just right. Despite our disappointment at not making it to the parade, we were still having a great time.

SOOOOOOOOO, Lindsay (my sister), her boyfriend (Dan) my friend (Brooke) and I decided to drive to Williamsburg (also in Brooklyn), and go to a great seafood restaurant that Dan recommended.

Okay, right? That sounds like a good "Plan B." Let's go to some hip restaurant in some hip neighborhood and feel as if the day is still going well.

So, we find our way there, by car, using a subway map. This was definitely a demonstration of our fine skill at navigating (I can't believe it actually worked) - we made it there within a half hour.

Only to find? It was closed until dinner time.

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!

So, at this point, I hadn't eaten since 9am, and it was after 4pm. We found a little cafe right where we had parked, figured out that they were still serving food until 4:30 pm, so we ran to our table, sat down, picked out food, and took a NICE, DEEP BREATH! Phew!!!

What an adventure!!!!!!

I promise to post some picks from the day in my next post :)

Like a Phoenix, She Rises Again

Well, that's an overly dramatic title :) Tomorrow morning, I am taking advantage of my (much-needed) vacation from work, and I am flying to Arizona (get it? She rises.... in an airplane....).

Oy vey.

Now, some of you may ask, why in the world would you fly to Arizona in the god-forsaken month of August? Marci, do you want to melt in that dry desert destination?

Well, trust me, I have a very good reason. My best friend, Jessica, lives there with her husband, and they had a baby in January. I've blogged about long term friends before, and Jessica is the longest - we've been friends since we were about 8 years old. She is like a sister to me, and thus, her son is like a nephew. I can't wait to cuddle him and give him a big hug and kiss! Occasionally, I plan on jumping in the pool a few times!

I really love the Phoenix area, and Arizona in general. I have a dream of opening up some kind of spiritual center there - a Jewish wellness center of some sort. I think it could really be something incredible, and a much needed institution. We would offer retreats, spa treatments, worship and meditation experiences, all through a Jewish lens... Cool, eh? Just check in with me in about five years, and let's see if I've made the dream a reality!! But, shhhhh, don't tell anybody :)

Well, I hope to write an update from the Southwest while I am gone, but, if not, talk to you soon!!

The Delicate Balance between Relationships and Friendships

Why is it so hard to create a healthy balance between relationships and friendships? And am I the only one with this problem? Upon reflection, I realize that I have always had difficulty balancing the time spent, and priorites given, to whomever my current boyfriend was at the time, and my other friends or family members. I really wish I knew how to do this better, and I hope that I am finally learning so that I will do better in my next relationship.

I am now seeing how much my last relationship tore me away from my closest friends. He was so painfully introverted, and socially anxious, that we turned down many invitations to parties, dinners, and other gatherings. Therefore, over time, I lost many contacts, didn't take advantage of others, and consequently, missed out on many wonderful times with my friends. I'm really quite sad about this.

On the other hand, thank goodness that I am out of the relationship now, and thus given the opportunity to rebuild the lost friendships and even build new ones. I am rediscovering my extroverted, silly, and social parts of myself - which I guess I really missed over the last four years!

*****
On a lighter note, I am in complete movie heaven right now. Dirty Dancing was on, and as soon as it was over, Grease started on another channel! Life is good :)

Friendship, Friendship, such a perfect blendship...

Shalom, all!

Just got back from a really yummy dinner with my friend, Sarene, and her fiance, Andy. It was my first chance to meet him (and I totally approve). I am glad that she found such a sweet guy who will definitely take good care of her (and she of him!). Coincidentally, I just took an online survey, and one of the questions was, "How many of your current friends have you known longer than ten years?"

What a question. Considering that parts of me still feel 12 years old, it is a profoundly paralyzing question to ponder (ah, an alliteration addiction attacks again). I can't believe that I have people (family members naturally excluded) in my life who have been precious to me for over a decade. Jessica is, of course, my longest friendship - we are probably over 20 years at this point. Lauren is also a long-term friendship, and, thanks to MySpace, Friendster, Facebook and the like, I am rekindling friendships from the whole spectrum of my life.

And, lest I be tempted to think of Sarene as one of my "newer" friends, I must remember that I met her in 1995 (we were both Angels in a Hillel production of Anything Goes). She has been a friend for - can it be true? - twelve years!!

Well, here's to long friendships, and many more to come.