What if I attended Mass tomorrow and.....

...wore a hat?

As a male, I mean. Could I enter the church and take my place in a pew wearing, let us say, a pretty natty fedora?

OK in the Synagogue but not in a Catholic church
that's the custom you see?

Would anyone notice? I think that they would...a man wearing a hat in church would stick out like, well, a man wearing a hat in church!

Would people be scandalised? I would hope so. It is our culture, unlike that of the Jew, Muslim, Sikh or Hindu, for men to go bareheaded at Mass; in church, at all times.

It would be grossly wrong and offensive to do such a thing. As a boy at home I was not allowed to even enter the home wearing my school cap.

"Is thy father a Jew?" was the usual challenge from my Pa and, of course, I would remove the offending article pretty damn quick.

I believe that few men would enter a home with their hat still on. It is not just in church that this rule applies, our culture extends into the home situation as well.

And when men who are wearing a hat meet a priest or a  woman, what should they do? Well they should take it off as a mark of respect, they should doff it to use a quaint old word.

Now, when a woman enters a church, how should she be dressed as regards to headwear?

What does our culture say in this situation?

A scenario for Friday abstinence

It's Friday night and you go to friends for dinner having told them, some days beforehand, that you don't eat meat on Fridays.

Now the stuff of nightmares for Catholics
on a Friday night

As the main course arrives on the table you see that it is Beef Wellington (or Boeuf Wellington if you have executive friends).

What do you do?

A) Politely leave the meat and eat the carrots and potatoes making "umm,
     delicious" type noises

B) Wait until no one is looking and slide the offending piece of beef into your
      pocket or handbag

C) Slip the beef secretly to the family dog/cat/goldfish and hope for the best

D) Pretend you have a black eye and slap the beef over the 'bruise'

ANSWER: You do none of the above - you eat the meat without complaint.

No sin has been committed but a sin might be committed if you gave rise to offence and possible scandal by rejecting the meat. Your intentions were pure, no problem.

HOWEVER.......If halfway through the meal your hostess suddenly screams and says: "Swipe me but I've just remembered you are a card carrying Papist and you don't eat animals of the mammalian persuasion on Fridays"
You then have to go to some lengths to prove that your silence was born out of courtesy and not out of weakness on your part. Over to you.