Hmmmmm......

My computer is a little bitch and doesn't turn on most of the time. I beat her profusely and still she refuses to obey. Because of her disobedience my life has been hard to chronicle and share with you. As you may know by now, I have little to no memory and forget what I did just an hour ago. That might be an exaggeration but it certainly is hard to keep track of things when you don't have much order to your life. So let's see what you might have missed.... hmmm.....

Last weekend I went camping in the Poconos with some friends. We spent one day White Water Rafting in the freezing rain. It was awesome and miserable. It rained that whole night at the campsite which made our raging campfire smoke even more. I invented the SMOKEBAG to protect my precious eyes. Basically I wore my hooded plastic poncho backwards. Yes, it is hard to breath with plastic covering your face. I was sharing a tent with a really gorgeous chick and her wet dog. As hot as that might sound I can assure you it wasn't. We did giggle like schoolgirls at the sound of our friends getting it on a few tents away. It was like Girl Scouts all over again. Hmmmm....

Last week Sky surprised me by telling me to be at a certain location by 5:30 and when I arrived they informed me he got me an aromatherapy manicure and pedicure. He isn't really the type to do this sort of thing so it really shocked me. How sweet right? Now I must wonder what he did wrong. Hmmmm....

I think I did lots of other things this week but they must have been comparatively insignificant. So what do we have to look forward to in the week to come? Let's check the calendar. Selling more collagen and the annual Pap Smear. Hmmmm...

Bad Dreams

The other night I had a very vivid dream and when I awoke I couldn't seem to shake it. It started out being my normal confusion of a dream where who I am with keeps changing at random as does our location. I was North of San Francisco for some reason and I needed to find a zip car (rental car) because I had a performance later that night. I was in a huge rush and was very anxious in my dream. While I'm running out to find a car I am in New York. Somehow in my dream this makes complete sense to me. We (I have no idea who I was with.) were running up to a building that we thought might be the correct location to find the car when suddenly I hear a horrible loud boom in the distance. I look up and the skyline is suddenly mushrooming up in an explosion of smoke and fire. It was enormous. I stood there looking at it in shock. Then it was like a wave of heat from the fire hit me and I realized the whole island would soon be ablaze. The person I had been running with pulled me into the building we were headed towards in an effort to find safety. Inside we found an empty area of cement floor and walls with stairs to more of the same. There was nowhere to go and I came to the realization that we were going to die there. This is when I forced myself awake. I don't die in my dreams. I often wake up and force my dreams to go another way but for some reason I could find no solution and in this story in my head that is the only ending I have. Sure now that I'm completely awake I can think of any number of things that could suddenly happen. I should go running for the river and swim to Jersey. It's too late though. I needed to dream it. Does anyone else have this problem? Do you have dreams that are so troubling you can't get past it?

Once my mother called me at an odd time and said she just needed to know I was okay because she had a dream I killed a man and boiled his head to hide the evidence. Yes, I said my mother had this dream. I had a nightmare as a child that an alligator ate my brother. I woke up crying and wrote a story for school about it. Why are the good dreams so hard to remember comparatively?

WWC- Set My Blog On Fire!

I missed several weeks of the WWC because I am a procrastinator. Every week Tuesday sneaks up on me and I'm supposed to have pictures up but I always find that I forgot to take them. This time I remembered to take my camera with me on the way out of the apartment. Our WWC host Tink gave us the words THREE and FIRE last week. This is the crap I came up with:

This is Brian's daily dilemma. He comes into the office and has to decide which of the THREE chairs in his cubicle will be his bum rest for the day.

These are our THREE office plants. I used to take care of the one on the left but it kept growing towards my co-worker so I gave him custody. I still say hello on occasion. No hard feelings.

FIRE Hydrant

I set the toilet on fire. I'm still not quite sure why I did that.

Oh yeah, that's right. I'm a bit of a pyro.