I wanted to write something but yet I don’t know what I should write or rather how I should write… It’s been the 5th day since 18th July when I said that to you… I don’t even know if you will even be coming here to read on my thoughts.


It’s ok if you did not come here as I know it will only hurt you more.
Sorry alone is not enough for the damage I have hurt you. I really don’t know what to say… how did things actually turn out this way?


Those days we had are really enjoyable and memorable to me; you are one really nice and sweet guy for me. Even though I was the one who initiated the part but just like you I’m also hurting myself… I can’t continue to keep quiet about my thoughts and feelings for you any longer, I don’t want to further deceive you nor hurt you more.


But what I’ve said to you before are all truly meant from my heart, its not lies and I really hope that you’ll believe me on this… just don’t doubt me anymore.
I know that you are crying alone… and it does affect me at the thought of it… I just want you to be happy and being well. It’s a pity that we can’t walk further anymore but I seriously treat you as a really special and close friend for now… it really ached me to know that you are suffering alone in the sadness that I have brought upon you.


You are a really nice guy but we are not fated to continue this journey… I wouldn’t mind if you were to hate me or anything… its just my fault. Whenever I see you online… I don’t know what to do… I want to be a friend to show concern and shower care for you, I want to comfort you yet I am in no position to do so. I wanna message you to know that you are ok… but I don’t know what should I message… and I’m afraid that it will only hurt you more if I send you a message… I really don’t want to continue hurting you le…


對不起, 一切都是我的錯... 真的只要你快樂, 告訴我你會好好的過...
Thank you for all the sweet and good memories you brought for me…
You’re forever my first love.

Labels: Feelings, Love