Celebrate

Coming into the holiday season, everyone is so busy. We rush to and fro, picking up this and that and rarely take a moment for ourselves.

But let's make this holiday season a little different. I hope everyone will realize, it is the little moments that those we love will treasure. It's not the presents; it's YOUR presence.

But I'm hoping to be present, aware and relishing the moment not only for those I love, but for those little quiet stolen moments for me.

I promise, I'm going to curl up by my fire and make toasted marshmallows for my pup and I'm NOT going to worry about all I have to do.

I'm going to linger in my creek and feel the joy that wells in my soul when I am there. I'm going to stop  for just a minute and celebrate the end of another day.

I vow to spend this holiday season finding joy along my path, celebrating my loves as well as my passions-

 I will seek out laughter and joy. I will celebrate life. I will celebrate me.

Renewal

There comes a time in everyone's life when you feel you need to start again...renew your faith in yourself, your art, your direction in life...your friends.

I hate starting over. Whether making a bead or a career choice...I just hate it. I fight. I struggle with the inevitable. Maybe I just hate to admit defeat.

So I guess it feels rather strange to admit, I need to start over at a time in my life when, creatively, things are on such a high note. But, in reality, as much as I love being an artist, I NEED to find a job that values (i.e. pays for) my time and expertise.

And while I know in my heart that this is true, I still fight it. I've worked from home for 10 years. It's been exhilarating knowing my days are my own. That whatever new career I land in will probably demand far more structure than I would like.

There are days when I'm dumbfounded by the possibilities.

I've finally trained myself on the torch to know what to do when this happens artistically. 

I return to the familiar. I make the thing I could make in my sleep. There are times I've done this for days on end...hoping for something, anything new and exciting to slap my muse upside the head. And eventually, something does. The act of doing is powerful. New things are born of the old.

And so it will be with this next big step in my life. I will concentrate on what I'm good at... on what I love. I will do and do and do and do until my path emerges.

Commitment to Art or Ready for the Looney Bin?

Whenever I'm asked to write on a theme - as I was for this month's Art Bead Scene Blog Carnival - I always like to look up that word and be sure I understand the theme and how that applies to the topic at hand. For the Blog Carnival, the topic is always the use of artisan made beads and the theme is commitment.

While pondering this word, I thought it would be the commitment that is dedication to one's art that I would write about, but that's not the true meaning of the word. A commitment is a pledge to do something in the future; a financial, physical or emotional obligation. That doesn't really seem fitting, does it?

But the first meaning of the word is even more interesting: The act of committing, as to a mental institution! Somehow, this definition seems far more fitting to my relationship with art glass beads!

How better to describe something that you are driven to do despite lack of sales or even positive feedback ? Isn't it somewhat crazy to keep doing something that costs so much time in research, education and promotion? Isn't it insane to keep throwing good money after bad all in name of your art?

So WHY keep doing it??? For me, it's the time at the torch that all the voices in my head just shut up and go... who cares where! (What's that? YOU don't have voices in your head??? You're probably NOT an artist. Every artist I know does. They are loud and critical!)

It's that moment when I accomplish something I was unable to before - a really cool bit of stringer design; a better understanding of some glass; an amazing sculpture. It's the knowledge that I am better for the practice.

So if you see the men in white jackets looking for me, tell them they can find me at the torch!

It's about MEEEEeeee!*

My left arm is completely numb... I've been on the computer too much and I've decided... I do weird things to my left arm. More on that on Creekhiker later.

But that means today's post (and the two others I have yet to write) have to be brief!

So I thought I'd send you blog hopping for more scintillating content than I can provide here, today!

I've been writing for the new, Timothy Adam handmade site called Handmade Spark. LOTS of good info about selling there! My articles are HERE.

Some of you know I also write for the Art Bead Scene's Blog Carnival. The third round of posts are officially up - all about Anticipation. Check them out... all inspiring!

My fellow Fire Diva Lea of LAJewelryDesign wrote an article about me for her blog.

And finally, there is a tax day sale on HollysFolly and my Artfire. 10.40% off and Fan page members get free shipping!

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*When my BFF was the hottest karaoke act in Los Angeles, she once had a customer sign up and then repeatedly come to the sound board, whining, "When's it gonna be MEEEEeeee?" She was dead serious! Whenever we get a bit full of ourselves or self centered, the BFF and I look at each other and whine, "It's about MEEEeee!!!" Forgive me!

Anticipation - It's Making Me Wait

I'm giggling as I write this because I actually looked up the definition of anticipation - the theme of my second Art Bead Scene Blog Carnival post.Webster's defines anticipation as " the act of looking forward; especially : pleasurable expectation."

I don't know that I've EVER associated the word "pleasurable" with anticipation. There's NOTHING pleasurable about it. I would call it "tortuous expectation."

Sometimes, beads look better than you even dreamed they could!

First of all, wait has never been my favorite word. I want it right NOW ...or yesterday would be better. So that I choose to work in a medium (glass) that requires some cooling down time is perplexing. It's so NOT me.

It kills me to know that I made a bead that I cannot touch, feel, marvel at right NOW. I have gone to bed and been unable to sleep and found myself bundled up in a housecoat and winter coat to traipse across my yard to the shop...just to see... knowing full well the kiln had not had enough time to ramp down. Sometimes I sit there staring at it, making sure it is ramping down...willing it to ramp faster.

And...sometimes they look worse! This bead idea came from one of my best selling fused pieces. It doesn't work as well as a torched bead...

The painful expectation continues when I finally do get to open that door...will the beads look as good as I thought they might going in??? (Glass changes colors when it's hot and the length of the time in the kiln can affect color too.) Will I be happy or sad when I open that door? Will I love it? Or will it be a disaster??? Will the beads work as I intended??? Or will all my hard work fall apart in my hands?

The Eggster Bunny

Some days, the anticipation leads to elation. Other days, I swear I need to sell my torch! No matter what, I always seem to find a new avenue I want to explore, a color I want to try, a scale I want to play with. And I find myself, staring at the kiln one more time, wrapped in the throes of tortuous expectation yet again.

It's a Carnival!!!

Some of you may have thought this post was a little unusual for me. It's true'; it was. That's because it was part of the Art Bead Scene's Blog Carnival!

A while back fellow lampworker, Cindy Gimbrone, asked if any of the regular readers of the Art Bead Scene were interested in blogging on a theme. Many of us were...so many that we only have to blog every other month.

I found myself part of a group of extremely talented art bead makers from variety of mediums! And I'm thrilled that a fellow Fire Diva, Janel Dudley will be blogging with us. Janel is a really talented lady, creative and contemplative. She, like me, maintains multiple blogs! Janel will be writing on the months that I'm off and I'm really looking forward to her contributions.

This month's theme is on beginnings. There are so many talented writers and bead artists in this group and I hope you will take the time to read what they have to say. Go for a fun carnival ride!