I havent been bloggin much these days and i dun feel the itch to blog. Could it be a possible symptom of adulthood?

Frankly, despite the trouble i face at work , i still prefer working to studying. Yes, you might argue that its only end of feb (which effectively means ive worked 2 months !) and so its too early to tell. But no, ive worked in other jobs as well and frankly, the thought of getting money into your account for the effort you have put in feels great. I'm sure many of my friends would agree with me. Money draws us in.

However, i also come to realise more about myself throughout this process. I learnt that i can only find out more about myself by pushing my limits, by thinking as hard as i can (yes, for lack of better words) and for trying my best.
I learnt that i was able stand up for myself and face adversity. But right now, even though ive learnt so much, i still realised theres more about me that needs to be changed.

For one, i can probably work on my speed and flexibility. I need to process information much faster. and for that, i need to be more knowledgeable. And to be more knowledgeable , i need to read up more, analyse issues myself and hear what others have to say. I admire my colleagues for being able to think so quickly on their feet and being able to talk about any current issue. I admire them for their opinions and i believe, such opinions are not formed through just reading, but by experience. I wish i could be like that too.

Right now, im still very much under-nourished when it comes to current affairs, mathematical figures and analysis. i need to work on that. and i need to do well.

damn it

i wish there was someone nice to talk to me right now. im already so tired and i just wish to talk to someone comfortable n nice. not someone who just shuts me n talks rudely.

damn.

i feel so alone.

Thanks for keeping me sane

It has been a terrible day for me today. For privacy purposes, i shall not state down what happened today here as you know, a blog is such a public platform.

Nonetheless, i still hold on to that feeling that im always second to the best. never first. never the best.

I feel terribly lousy and pathetic today. I broke down once. after trying to keep it controlled inside. It certainly did not feel good to let it out because letting it out was very much suppressed as well.

But im really glad i met friends over lunch and dinner today.

I met grace and justin for lunch and despite the little time we all had, it was still great catching up. And it was certainly a break from everything happening around me.

Then i met jessamyn and yee chien over dinner. Ok. More like over my dinner. I was an hour and a half late and they had their dinner while waiting for me. It was so sweet of them to not get angry with me despite my being late. and it was also sweet of them to lend me their listening ears as i vented out my frustration.

Thanks all of u guys. Thanking to all of you really made me feel so much better despite the bad day i had. It really meant a lot to me today. i went ard feeling like a piece of shit but after talking to my friends, i realised it really made a lot of difference and made my day better.

And not to forget, my dearest sweetie dew, who is ever supportive of me. Who was so worried about me that you called me several times while at work.

And right now, i feel so much better than at the start of the day.

It has been such a long time, my friends...

For anyone who still reads, it has been such a long time since i updated my blog. I have been so busy, *though, not such doing what in particular* with everything.

Day in day out i only seem to be able to spend less than half an hour in front of the computer to do the usual email checks.

Working is fun and im really enjoying it. I'm enjoying every single moment in my internship and i wish to learn from my colleagues all the possible skills, soft skills, hard skills, technical knowledge, etc to enrich myself and prepare for my future. i want to climb that corporate ladder. i really want to.

However this year, Rabbits will meet "xiao ren" and i think i have identified mine already. According to many zodiac predictions, the "xiao ren" will scheme to destruct your career path. Not only that, they might appear very nice externally but they mean something else. I have to be very careful of such "xiao ren" this year and this time, i'm very afraid that i would fight a losing battle. I m afraid but all i can do is to be more meticulous and careful in any of my dealings. I really need to work hard. I need to do well. i really want to do well in my future and i cannot let anyone ruin it. i have been through so much hardship to reach this stage. please dun let my dreams dash just at this moment. God please help me.


On the other hand, rabbits will also meet their "gui ren", who could be a pig or a rooster. My sweetie dew's a piggy. and im sure he will remain my gui ren for the rest of my life. But as for work, i wonder who my gui ren is.

It is also very important not to offend a potential gui ren this year as they might turn their backs on you. This is what im very afraid of.

I think i really am superstitious, but no harm what! haha. Anyway, i think i really need to buy some feng shui thing and put in the office to better my career luck. i really need it this time. i really like this job.


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Ok, enough taLK abt all that. Heres some out-dated pictures sweetie dew and i took while out at the Marina Barrage.








I think we look really cute together.












Muack!



Muack!




Look at the above and what he is pointing!




Look at mine now! spot the difference?


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On a totally separate note, despite the economic crisis, people are becoming much more generous this year with their ang paos!! I received a total of a lucky no! so happy! i send my well-wishes to everyone who gives me an ang pao!! may all of you fa da cai! and may all of u be happy forever!!!!!!!!