I didn’t forget

 Just no inspiration yet 😂

Mid-November

In the final week of October, I had the most fulfilling but longest work week in my life. Planning for the conference was long, but the execution was longer. It’s already mid-November, I felt that I have not recovered since. I was burnt out within the week, physically and mentally. I just feel that, my body is not well. Beginning of the week I woke up with the worst pounding headache. The next day my stomach was churning and I threw up the food I ate. I never throw up, besides hangovers. Today, I felt heart pains, aches around my heart/chest area. Some sort of anxiety. Not good. 

Nonetheless, it was extremely rewarding. I just didn’t realized how much it took a toll on my body. I drown myself in work, that’s the only satisfaction I get these days. Nothing outside of my work is fulfilling. Sadly. 

The 15th

I promised I’ll write today. We promised we will write today. 

My life is a mess. A little bit of good mess and plenty of bad mess. A few weeks ago, for once someone asked me how I am, and I could genuinely answer. Not the fake “Yeah I’m good!” because of the nature of my job. But right at the same time, I could not answer. I’m not good, but not bad. 

My career’s been progressing very well, although I had a shitty day today, but it’s something I could control and truly passionate about. I enjoy my work, I get satisfaction out of it. I make swift decisions, I know exactly which direction I want to go, and I drive along with my team. We produce results, and I give them shit when they don’t. 

Current personal life, not so much. So indecisive. I’m living in huge unhappiness but I don’t have the courage to let go. I really don’t know why, I put myself in this state. 

That aside, I hope you’re well. My alter ego. My imaginary life partner. You somehow fill in some gaps I have in my life. Have always been. Hope I see you write more often. 

I’m here. I’m breathing. I’m good, this 15th. 

xoxo

Revisit

I always remember that every January passes really fast. Once you crossed the NY's day, everything zoom by especially for this month. Mid month already! I told myself to get my driving license by end of Jan... is it still gonna happen? And I need to get the safety inspection done for my car by end of this month too.  This is a must otherwise I will by pulled over by the cops. Lol. Today's day off came by a surprise. My boss called me before 7am to tell me to take a day off today & tomorrow. Didn't have anything planned for today and I did nothing but shopped around Kihei (and bought a new top again) keep shopping OMG! I just need to bring my entire wardrobe from Singapore so I can stop buying new clothes.

Is Singapore trip in March gonna happen???!!!! Hate to wait on stuff like that and I don't even know if I should go on this trip, feels too soon to go home to be honest. But yeah I miss my friends & family plenty! It's weird how I don't really feel like going back for CNY. lol.

Employee party tonight btw. Limited clothes to choose from but that makes it easier! Hahaha.

Still in disbelieve that the year is ending! I still have vivid memories when we first stepped into 2014. Somehow, time just fly by really really quickly last couple of years. I am not sure if it is the technology we have which made me feel that way or it's true when people say time flies when you're in your 20s. Another year with lots of things happened in my life. I remember how I spent my crossover to 2014 in the Serengeti. Right now I am in a completely different country/city/island at the other end of the world, waiting for 2015 to come by.

This year I made two trips home. I was very home deprived after the first year in Serengeti and kind of got sick of travelling elsewhere. Glad I took a trip during CNY and the chance to spend it with my family. Also rather surreal that Almas did make it to Singapore and spent some time on the island I grew up in. Had him utilize his comp nights for the first time was super cool and we got the chance to stay in FS Singapore & Regent.

Second trip home in August was fantastic as well spending more time with my friends & family, and reconnecting with my best friend is the greatest deal of the trip. Having my family fly out to Serengeti in May was another moment worth remembering. I always dreamed of sharing the beauty of the Serengeti with my family since day 1 I arrived and glad they also managed to spend some time in Arusha. It was a long long travel for them which I can totally imagine but I am sure the trip was worthwhile.

The other FS trips includes my second time in BKK and back to the Maldives - this time to both Kuda Huraa & Landaa Giravaaru. Great time spent in Bangkok eating & shopping. Plus staying at the Four Seasons (which will soon be gone!) Maldives trip was much anticipated since the first day I confirmed my flight tickets. Back in KH with so much memories so seeing some of my friends from 5 years ago was just amazing. Landaa is so beautiful and I was so grateful for the chance to visit this time! Thank you to Poh Suan for being my travel buddy these trips during my time back in Asia in August.

Eldest brother flew out in September for the last chance to visit me in the bush. Really glad he made it otherwise I would imagine no other chance he will fly into Africa.

Then comes the big move! Never imagine I would have the chance to apply for a position in Maui, and getting it! My 3rd promotion in 6 years, 4th property in 6 years. I was ecstatic when I found out I was chosen. I bet it was a tough decision to make but I am thankful for my boss's faith in me, to move me from Serengeti to Maui, one of the busiest resort within the company, with a promotion. Packed my bags and was ready to leave in September. Hard to say goodbye to the beautiful mother nature and my daily dose of wildlife. Spent a week in Dar es Salaam getting my visa worked out before I flew out to US. Also hopped over to Zanzibar (FINALLY!), another gorgeous island in the Indian ocean. Finally met Alisia for the first time, which also felt like the last. She is the cutest I swear. Love her so much. At last bid goodbye to Almas at Dar airport not knowing when is the next time I would see him again. Tough, tough to say goodbye.

Longest trip I ever taken, traveled from Dar to Maui via Amsterdam & LA. First time I lost track of date and time. The moment I arrived in Kahului international airport with 2 suitcase was weird. I didn't know which day it was. The moment to be picked up was nerve wrecking. I didn't know who was coming, I didn't know what my new life in Maui would bring.

It has been almost 3 months now, a quarter of a year and I still feel super new on this island. Getting a hang of the new resort, new job, new position, new friends. Miss being loved and wish my friends were here to share this beautiful island with me. I have to say, life has been good so far. I made a couple of friends from work, I found a new place to stay and a cute car to drive around. Haven't much explored the island but I hope over time I would do more of that. Getting more settled about work though I have tonnes of new stuff to learn.

Honestly my life right now is never I have imagined I would be at 26. I feel like a completely different person from 10 years ago. Everything right now is really surreal, my travels, my accomplishments, my friends, my habits, my life. But one thing I will always bear in mind, my home will always be Singapore. My family and my heart will always be at home.

FYI - I have no plans made for the NY. hahaha.

And also no travel plans made for 2015. hahaha.

every day I still feel surreal to be here. I know I have felt surreal many times in my life - first in Serengeti, now here in Maui. especially those times when I'm cruising on streets in my own car. unbelievable how much I have grown over these years. moving overseas is the greatest decision I have made in my life. and I was so lucky to first move to Serengeti whereby I do not need to worry anything about my livelihood, basically only learning about living apart from my family. now at 26, I moved out to the US on my own. getting my own place and a car. this might be something so normal for many people around the world, but for Singaporeans this is definitely a big deal, right? yes I miss my family & friends at home so much. but each day every moment I feel I'm growing up. still lots of things to learn and have to know for sure. today I was just looking at a sticker on my windscreen with a date & mileage not knowing what was it. hahaha. 

can't believe I am here, Hawaii. 

I know I am very lucky, and I am very grateful.

I wish I was a little more lucky though, I really wish that Almas could be here. 

Miss my family too, plenty! & my friends, of course. I wish I could bring my life in Singapore to Maui.