i have no idea whats my recent obsession with bloggin again. but anyway, i have taken so many pictures but just have no time to upload them onto my blog!

The reason why i upload them is so that i can delete these pics n free up space in my computer as well as in my hp and camera.

LOTS OF PHOTOS ..

So here goes again. Meet up with YMCA.. a week or 2 ago. haha



Above: YC, me, Ai ting



Above: Ting ting...looking pretty as ever



Above: Cecilia..



Above: Cecilia again.. always so photogenic



Above: YC.. with a funny face



Above: Dinner at Kenny Rogers after much indecisiveness.



Above: Aiting me n yc in the dressing room of Marina Square's Bebe. Why are we there? haha.. because our dear cecilia was trying on clothes and we , the rest of the poor people.. cannot afford to buy anything from that shop. one top can cost around 80 plus bucks. can u imagine how expensive? normally my dresses cost only at most $30. one stupid top can already buy like 2 to 3 dresses or clothes for me.

So, we decided to just sit in their nice dressing room (of course.. no one was looking) and hide there til cecilia finished changing n stuff. haha



Above: Me, yc, cecilia, aiting at some cafe in Raffles City eating crepe and cakes. haha..

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Last sunday, i went to do my hair again. yes, finally. after all the exams and what no, i finally managed to go to the salon to do my hair. for those who know me better, you would know that i always go to Jean Yip Bugis to look for Jeffrey to do my hair. Thats because i trust his skills and i have never regretted any experience there at all. But the thing is you see.. i have been going there since secondary school and also, its very expensive. This is especially so because i was looking to cut, perm and dye my hair.

The other time i did a cut, perm, dye and highlight, it cost me $300.

So for once.. i decided to change and be more thrifty.

There is this Snip Avenue salon that just opened near my place. The place looks quite trendy and hip, some what like Supercuts. The people there look quite young and happening too. haha.. Ok. heres one thing i wanna say first. It doesnt mean that going to a salon where the hairstylist are young and happening is good.in my humble opinion,the best type of hair stylist to go for is one who is mature and experienced and cant really be bothered to do much with his hair anymore. Thats because they do other people's hair until sian already and so when they see their own hair, they sian 1/2. haha..

So anyway, i contradicted my own opinion and decided to go ahead and try out this salon. I have never thought of doing anything there EXCEPT TO DYE MY HAIR. Thats because dyeing does not require so much skill and any newb can do it. IT turned out.. i think the most experienced hairstylist there approached me and asked me about the services i required. I initially insisted on merely dyeing and guess what? Just like what all experienced hair stylists would do, he persuaded me to cut my hair and blah blah blah. the list goes on.

Then i told him about my intention to perm my hair. So he said... "you know.. if you dye first then perm, the colour will wear off". So, you can guess my reaction.

at that time, i was already sitted on the chair. how could i stop and say.. " er.. den nvm. i dun wan to do already"

Obviously not right? so end of the day, i decided to do everything there.

perm = $78
Dye + treatment + Cut = $68
Total= $146

The price is so much freaking cheaper la!
So heres how i look..



Above: With wires all hanging around me. this is how cock i look when i m perming my hair. like some science experiment like tt.

New hair!






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Went out with Shermaine, my roomie from hall 3 on thursday!

Spent money AGAIN. arghh.. BUT! i did put in effort to try not to spend money k?

I did it by going to the dressing room, fitting an outfit for myself and taking a photo! n i did not buy whatever i tried! good rite? good way to save money. but now.. i keep looking at the photo everyday.. and all my mind can think of is buying it. haha.. so.. i guess my plan to save money this way backfired on me.



Above: Casual wear at Forever 21.

Shermaine and me have similar taste. Once, we bought the same clothes but different colour online.

Now, again, we bought the same BUT different coloured shoes.





Above: Close up of shoes

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on a totally random note, i met long lost friend , hawa, from secondary school at Marina Square while shopping !



Above: Hawa and me. she's still as hot as ever!

oh yes. just like to announce.

will be passwording my blog sometime soon. perhaps with the start of the new year. For privacy purposes of course. For those who wanna view it, ask and you shall receive! =)

Thanks for your readership so far! haha. i know many misc ppl are viewing it. haha.. there has been nice people and there has been nasty people.

However, would like to highlight a case of a nice person who came across my blog when she was surfing. realised i wasnt in a very good mood and decided to send me a msg despite not knowing me. such small little actions are actually very heart warming. and i wanna tell everyone.. spread the love around peeps! =)

ok. shall be passwording the blog. who wanna view it? i repeat.

ASk and u shall receive! you can email me. hahaha..

*as if i m very famous like tt. =.="""""

Just came back from Pulau Ubin. i m really going damn fat. we were determined to eat seafood at Pulau Ubin before going back to mainland because it would have been such a waste to travel all the way there and not indulge in some of their island seafood.

So.. we ordered.. black pepper crab. $24 bucks. is it cheap? or normal price?

Today is a bad day.

It started off with midnight when i received my results.
Then in the morning when mum scolded me.
Then in the afternoon when A BIRD SHAT (PAST TENSE FOR SHIT HAHAHA) ON MY HAND!

can you believe it? of all places, it had to shit on my hand! yucks! And because i felt it instantaneously, the shit.. if you would like to know, was white with transparent fluid. there was also a line of black shit together with the package. It was warm.

yucks. the thought of it totally turns me off! how unlucky can i get!

I hope tomorrow will be a better day!

Sweetie and i are getting fat! this week would be eat good food week!

Thursday just ate with his parents at Teo Chew Garden at Concourse, where there was crayfish, yam paste, money bag, sharks fin, yam paste.

Friday (which is today) we ate black pepper crab, potato leaves and hotplate tofu.

Tomorrow (saturday), we shall once again indulge. This time in Buffet.

You tell me la...! like that... HOW NOT TO GET FAT!?!?!?!?!?!?!

I m so fat i cannot stand properly anymore!


Shall post pictures taken another time.

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Now, i shall blog about the CS gathering we had last week. Met up with Grace, Jing Ting, Wai Mun and Justin.

They were so sweet! they bought me a scarf from Pull and Bear. It is purple! my favourite colour. and it has burberry inspired designs! Cool! =)

We then bought Wai mun a bouquet of flowers for her bday.
We also bought Justin a shirt for him to wear. coz he always wear the same few pieces. wahaha.. =x opps..



Above: Wai mun, me, jing ting and grace.
We were supposed to pose with a ballerina (statue) behind. but... the person who took the picture for us apparently did not really take much of her.




Above: There! Here she is..


We went to bugis street to shop shop. and guess who we found?!?!?



Above: a cutesy little doggie dog! It looks so..... soft toy like. its just beautiful!





If you were wondering where the hell was Justin... haha.. he forgot about our meeting !!!!! and was only arriving at 4 la!!

We were meeting at 130 you see...


haha..



Above: Jingting and me. i m wearing someone's shades. cant rmb whose.



Above: finally.. with the arrival of justin. At the dessert place near liang seah street. i think thats what its called.







above: dun they love me??? hehehehe.. n wth is justin doing there? standing like cock.

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Xmas lightings at Orchard road... Before the battery on the camera went FLAT.

haish. i wake up early this morning only to be scolded by mum.

For my carelessness of an email.

You can see how bad the day was already by the previous email. I thought it would be effective if i slept over my bad results. Turns out, it isnt because i m yet again woken up by bad luck.

Going cycling today. I wonder if the day will ever ever ever turn out fine. Hopefully i can take a few photos.

I have gotten over the bad results. i have dropped from a second upper to a second lower. it sucks. because of my stupid 255 grades, it has pulled my gpa to 3.6. can you believe it? i stil cant.

I have my previous 2 semesters to thank for though.. because my cumulative is ard 3.9. so i have only this to console myself. I need to do very well in my next next semester in order to get a second upper. To think i was still wishing for a first class honours when i was in my first year. Hopes of first class honours are definitely dashed, especially when i m taking business minor. i just aint good at numbers. i have to accept that. but for greater diversity, and to exploit my 4 years, i cannot just do a simple degree and a single major. i need to maximise my time and i need to improve.

I thought about it and i think maybe i should already consider myself lucky for getting those average grades. This is because...

I took one night to study 255.
I took one weekend to study business finance.

So, at least for these 2 subs, i should really count myself lucky not to get a fail.

I m also beginning to wonder if i would have did better if i SUed 255 instead of french.

So, instead of continuing to wallow in self pity (which is what i told myself to do yesterday nite ) , i shall emerge a new and stronger me. and try to convince myself that i m smart. because, i took one day to study some subjects and i got a B or B+. its good enough. So, if i had more time, i would have gotten an A+. (yeah rite... )

But what i feel sad about is my 257 which i study for so hard. I ended up getting just a b+ which is totally pathetic. i tink i deserve an A.

But nonetheless, i think the lesson learnt here is the same as what i've learnt in PSLE, Sec 3 and JC1.

Do not slack. or you will do terribly in your exams. it is very true. God can see the amount of effort you put in when you study. IT is only when you study until you wanna die, cry, etc, then God will give you good grades.

haha. ok. childish remark above. just heck it. but i stil believe in it. n no.. i m not any advocate or anything. dont get me wrong. When i say God, i meant... heaven, fairies, all the good things that are immortal and extraterrestrial. ok. i'm blabbering again.

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Heres some photos from the SuperStar Virgo Trip in Dec ! with janice n her bf!



Above: Sweetie n me posing by ourselves.







Its only on the last day janice n i realised we din take much photos. so... heres it!




Above: JAnice n i hugging some weird statue's head. ok. i look super fat here. but i loveeeee the dress k... its so cool la.


Sweetie dew n me



Janice n bf

i really hate you, M. Y. i really hate you!

you gave me my first B- in my life! you caused me to drop from second upper to second lower. i really so damn fucking hate you!!!

why must you screw up other ppl's life! why!
why! why why why why!!!!!

you know, by doing this, you have made me lost hope? i seriously hate you! now i have lousy exam results! i cannot have a good future. i cant find a good job. i will live a terrible life! i SO DAMN FUCKING HATE YOU!


i scrwed up this semester. i did damn badly. i m so screwed. i dunnu how to face myself and how to explain.

okay. i'm fine already. really. and yes, i say so everytime. haha.

but i really am trying to take things easy nw. people say, if we are willing to just let loose a little and not pick on too many things, things will go happy. So, the best way about all troubles is to let them be and see how things go. Things happen for a reason. and i guess, i'm trying to take things easy so that too much conflict will not happen. I also realised the best way is not to keep talking and thinking about things that bug you. the best way is to just keep it aside and forget. in that way, no conflict will occur. haha..

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lots of things happened over the few weeks. now i m left with a few days left before i leave singapore. and of course, for privacy purposes, i would not say when i m leaving.

Sweetie Dew accompanied me to Msia last weekend with my parents. it was so sweet of him. =)
Glad that Dad is getting along well with sweetie=) i really think its very important for family to accept him and i m glad everythings going rather smoothly. first time see dad talk non stop so passionately. hahaha..

Then... we went to Mount Faber to celebrate Xmas. haha.. so many interesting things happen there. will blog about them soon when i have uploaded the photos..

Haish.... new year is coming soon.. which means.. time together is coming to an end!!! arghhh!! =(

Merry xmas everyone!

Xmas is supposedly the time of the year where everyone is happy and rejoicing. true enough, if you guys have read Straits times few days ago, it says that it is not true that everyone is happy during xmas. Now, i totally believe its true because not everyone is happy on xmas.

Whats there to be happy about anyway?

IT is just a season where people waste money and allow gift companies to make money. ok. not just gift companies, but perhaps also flower shops, restaurants, places of interest, hotels, etc. the list goes on.

I'm trying to recall a time in my life where my xmas was really happy and fruitful. but i cant. partly because i guess i m not a Christian and thus i do not enjoy any parties of sort. also, i do not celebrate them.

So i guess for once where i tried to get into the festive mood, things didn't turn out well. instead they took a turn for the worse. Efforts to celebrate an occasion that i do not really bother about instead made me feel more terrible than even on a mundane day. This day also made me realise what a failure i was and made me confused about what m i actually doing with my life. perhaps the day was not meant to be a celebratory one for me in my life, for i have never really celebrated xmas and for once i m trying to celebrate it, things turn out worse than ever.

So i guess the lesson learnt is.. if the occasion is not meant for you to celebrate, dont celebrate it. dont push it. dont push things because all things bad will keep coming to you.

in the meantime, for those happy people out there, do enjoy yourself. because you are one of the lucky ones that are truly happy. do cherish the happiness that you feel because you should always keep in mind that not everyone is celebrating and you should not take those feelings for granted.

merry xmas everyone!

i m such a pathetic fool.

what a bad xmas it has been.

no one noes n understands how i feel. its always me who screws up everything.

how i wish all these didnt happen. i m so fucked up. i just wanna run away and hide. i just want a hug and i just want someone to listen to me when i cry out loud.

but all i;ve got is this blog with me. to listen to my sorrows and for me to cry alone in this lonely xmas night.

i m fucked up. i m such a loser. when can i stop being one?

i have to learn to be less of a loser. can you tell a loser how to stop being a loser when she;s just born the way she is?

i need someone to cry to. why isnt there anyone around?

i hate crying to myself. i hate it. i m so tired. so so tired. but i cant do anything about it.

the pain just keeps coming. the stabs just keep going. hopelessness. im just so hopeless.

can you teach me how? can you teach me how
can you teach me how i can cope with all these?

i know everything is my fault. i know. i m really trying but somehow nothing seems to work out. everything just comes to a lousy end. i suck. i really suck.

yes yes. i have not blogged for so so so long.

I sent my lap top for servicing and i just got it back yesterday. So finally, i can start up all over again and get my lappie prepared for Aussie.

After coming back online finally properly, i looked at many blogs and all and realised i really missed out a lot.

I m also beginning to miss out on everything.

First, i realised my group of friends are becoming smaller and smaller. I have less and less friends and i find myself very pathetic. but who am i to blame? no one but myself. I moved away slowly from some activities and hence, am in less contact with those friends. For example, MJ. I m unable to attend many practices, many stuff and i stopped ****ing. as a result, i have come into less contact with those friends with whom i engage with commonly in those activities. And so, we all drift apart and friendships are lost.

But when i come to think of it, why is it that such friendships are so easily lost just by lack of contact while some of my friendships can last so long even though i meet some of my friends less than 5 times a year?

Is it true that those friends in which friendships are easily lost are just merely activity partners? the moment you are gone, they dont care a damn about your presence? Actually, when i come to think of it, maybe its that way.

I also wonder, if i dont bother to contact certain friends, will they ever contact me? that really shows how little i mean to people. . =(

Perhaps i m just meant to be one of those who are meant to have few friends in their life. Few people that they can call their "zhi ji" .

And because of that, i feel very sad for myself.

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Ok. enough of those stuff. Just met up with the CS peeps this afternoon and had a great time catching up. Everyone's looking for xmas pressies except me. Coz.. i dont have any xmas parties or dinners to attend. boo hoo.. so.. no gift exchanges for me.

To think on the bright side, i dont have to spend money on any pressies. to think on the sad side.. i m so unwanted no one wants to invite me. hahaha..

Anyway, we took quite a few pics.. will upload them when my computer is fully set up.

in the meantime, enjoy holidays while slacking.

just caught Enchanted yesterday. it was superb. the costumes are so nice too. for a moment, it really made me believe that there was indeed magical fantasies that could come true in this world. For a moment, all i felt was insane happiness and that unexplainable high. For that moment, all you wanted to do was smile. because it was simply such a good and feel good movie. the singing, the people, the smiles, and not to forget, the happy ending.

Now, comes my cliche again.... however, we do know that such movies just serve to live out the child in us again. the child that once craved from prince charming to rescue us from the evil around us. the child that wishes for a happily ever after.
Disney's missions in making us believe that there is indeed a fairytale for each of us out there has really succeeded. at least, for me.
I've always been idealistic and wished for my prince charming to come to me, thus setting my expectations of others very high. but now i realised, disney is just a money making organisation and all the fantasies it creates in us is just so that we could part with the money just to live out a bit of our fantasies for that few moments. now i've even read somewhere that designers are designing disney princess gowns.

Such an example is as below. a Belle (from beauty and the beast) inspired wedding dress.





But well, all i know is that when i came back into reality, i know that such dreams are always just.. dreams. My want for an ideal wedding, a happily ever after ... will never come true. how can such be possible when there are just so many things around us? so many mediating factors that prevent us? And.. that prince charming of ours in our imagination.. the only possible way to have an ideal prince charming is to self-construct one. Your significant other... or some others call.. the one for u.. will never be oh-so-perfect. Despite whatever they do, whatever sweet things they say, at the end of the day, wouldnt we just keep comparing them with our ideal Mr Prince Charming? And you know what? i shall play the blame game and push all the responsibilities for causing all these unhappiness to Disney. They created these childhood fantasies in us and because of that, we use them to compare it to those that we love. and then we question... why are these people not like our ideal characters? Then we start to have conflict, and you know.. what happens next.


So right now, all i wanna say is.. we need to look at each other and accept each other's flaws. and we cannot just keep asking for change. as we know, its impossible for someone to change so much because when they really do.. is that really what u like about them anymore? We should stop comparing our loved ones with our ideals and learn to live with reality. In fact, we should learn to see the magic and appreciate the small little possible mAGic in our lives. Little miracles do pop by time and again. we should be taking note of all these instead of zooming in on all the craziness the reality could bring.

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Going on cruise this evening lo! =) can spend the next 3days and 2 nights with my beloved beloved sweetie dew! =) happy happy!