heres a poem for all of u. i keep forgetting to type. haha.. ITS JANICE'S FAVOURITE POEM!!! SHE RECITES IT ALL THE TIME!!
here goes..:

fast faster fest
never let it rest
until the fast is faster
and the faster's fest

wahaha... janice your secret is leaked out!! opps!!!!!!!!!

elo... tml is stupid road run!! i dun wanna run...
anyway, someone just told me i'm fat. =( wanna cry. but must ACT. so smile smile. den my moods got the better of me. so i became silently angry.
i know. all of u are saying, mei qin. pls. for goodness sake. take a look at yourself. accept your fate tt you're fat n stop getting pissed at it. i know. i accept my fate. but i just dun like hearing ugly things like this. cannot is it? haha.
i really try very very very hard to lose weight already. i go swimming as regualrly as i can. look at my tan and u'll know how much effort i have put in. why am i still nt losing weight? i dun understand. i have replaced breaks of burgers with fruits. i will conmtinue this/. i have been doing it for the past yr. but why m i still so fat? is there sumting wrong with me? how i wish i am like those ppl who eat a lot still nv fat. its better to be skinny than fat. i hate fats. arghh.
i think i m ok with ppl telling me that i m ugly. because i know for sure, thats a fact. but although my being fat is also a fact. but i dun like it./ i just dun like. anyway, ya. just continue calloing me fat. i try to tolerate n smile more often den the pain will go away. this can also allow me to train up on my virtues such as patience, tolerance and perseverance. i'm afriad i might " wan bu qi " and end up hating ppl. so far, it hasnt happened.
i m a weird person. i like praises though i know most of those praises are just fake ones to console me. i dun like lying about this sorta things to ppl.i m wierd.
the end.

hello. today i would like to type an angry entry. i m very pissed with someoe. that someone is my cousin. she is a big fat sucker. i hate her. i dun even want to regard her as my cousin. she is from singapore from my mum's side. she is a big fat sickening sucker of a bitch!
u noe wat? today after tuition i had to go to my grandma's house to bai nian. so when i reach there, she was lying on a sofa. treating us like invisible. n u noe wat? my poor grandmother who had terrible walking difficulties were like struggling to walk from the kitchen to the door to oopen the door for us. n wat is the big fat pig doing on the sofa? lying down looking at her lap top.
HELLO! EVEN IF U DUN LIKE US, U DUN HAF TO TORTURE YOUR OWN GRANDMOTHER. n u still sometimes act as if u love your grandmother so much. u noe wat? u r a failure. U R SUCH A FAILURE IN LIFE. i pity your parents. they did not bring u up well. they had such a FAILURE for a daughter.
basic respect! u dun even have a basic respect for your aunts and uncles. what the hell is wrong with u? after going through university, u still become like that! no wonder u r only a tuition teacher. " so called self-employed" eh? hahah.. more likie.. no one wants to accept u!
no wonder u dropped out of law schoold half way. its not because u r stupid well, dumb or watsoever., u noe why? becaquse U HAVE SHIT IN YOUR HEAD. YOUR WHOLE BRAIN IS MADE OF NOTHING BUT SHIT. OR MAYBE NOT EVEN SHIT. ITS HOLLOW!
u sucker! i hope u will fail in every single thing u do! no wonder so many ppl dun like u.
when i c u lying there. i noe u werre peeping . i noe. u think i m stupid? haha.. i'm so sorry to say i m not AS DUMB N FUCKED UP AS U!
u were looking at me. i dunnu with wat kinda expression.i cant be bothered with u! i looked back at u and "gin" u. i know u know. i purposely want u to know.
U R SUPER CHILDISH SO I MUST BE SUPER CHILDISH BACK TO U TOO..
SUCKER SUCKER SUCKER SCUKER. ASSHOLE!
u idiot.
i know it is very bad to scold ppl during chinese new yr. but i cannot take it liao! hmphx!
idiot!

hello bloggie.
i hope this is the last time i laspe into depression before the lunar new yr.i m very sad. i suddenly feel very inferior. i know. i m very ugly. i think i m extremely ugly and fat. i need to go on a diet. i did not exactly go on a diet but i have tried eating very little and exercising a lot already. is it fated that i have to stay with such an ugly physique? i m so ugly. i have such a big nose n big mouth. to add on to that i have ugly teeth. i hate myself. i really hate everything related to myself. i m sickeningly ugly. y is it like tt? i just want to be a bit pretty. i dunnu what the hell i m talking abgout here. i m just venting my frustrations and stress thaqt have been bottled up in me since feb. i dunnu wats coming onto me again.
i hope that this depression will go away. no one can take it away from me.
not many people know about this.its is not fang bian to talk about this on my blog so i cant really talk about it. i keep being reminded of sumting else.(u'll nv guess. so dun bother guessing or even asking!) the moment it tries to go away, it comes back again. n again. n again. n the problem is. i want it to come back . wth n wtf is wrong with me?
i feel left out everywhere i go n everything i do these days. is it just psychological? i dun even feel like talking much to ppl these days. wats wrong with me? where's me?
icant stand silence. so y m i not talking? have i become mute? no way.
i m a very complex person. its hard to really understand me. i keep lying, dun i? i cant stop. i m so so so addicted to lying that i;m startinbg to believe my lies. wat the fuck is wrong with me? i cant fuck care about them. ok. enough of vulgarities used for one entry.
i m so ugly. i m so jealous of all of u pretty babes out there. i m so jealous n envious that i'm becoming suicidal. i want to be like all of u with all thos oppotunities that all of u can get. while i just cant. i want.
stop te;ling me i need to gain confidence. i m confident enoiugh already. i just dont c the results. i m just an ugl;y duckling hoping to be the one that turns into a really pretty swan.
i m rather shallow about myself.i ave high expectations for myself. i must fulfil them if not i will feel depressed. i m simply not contentecd with mediocricy. i need to be the top . i cant stand myself anymore.i feel really depressed. everyone can forget about talking me out of it.
gd night. happy chinese lunar new yr.

heyox..
long time nv blog liao. i've got nting much to say actually. oh ya.. today tj got cny carnival. before tt, went with hui qi they all to watch elektra. i think she is damn sei. the little gal is damn pretty too!! den at the cny.. there were stalls(duh~!) n an auction. aqil wear til really look like those auction kinda guy . haha.. so neway, there were so many "nian nian you yu" stalls.. haha.. the funnest one is where i used the plastic spoon to scoup up the guppies.. so cute u noe? haha.. but i got this feeling they'll die in like 2-3 days time. ahaha.. i m not a v pro fish owner. hahaha...
yc says the auction got ppl auction til a lot(forgot the amt) for the mr tong's soccer jersey when he was a star player. heard tt they say he used to b damn fit. but i really cant imagine. he look more like last time nerd nerd de.
haha.. but mr tong quite nice to me.. hahah.. so i wun say much. not say nice la. but nv catch me .
hahaha.. okok.. i dunnu wat to say liao bye bye.