GIVE TO OTHERS. GOD WILL GIVE YOU MORE

It's quite easy to turn your back to the misery of others. But not so when misery hits you. Then you wish that friends wouldn't turn their backs on you. 

-"Love one another as much as i love you." - God

 Love will turn the tide. Believe this because it's been done for ages, by many, in different circumstances, with the smallest or greatest of hearts and hands. Love breaks down all barriers -- real, perceived, or  imagined. 

Be that person you were designed to be. Maybe it will be tough for some as they hurt from life's pricks and thorns. But, truth is, there's no ifs and but's there;  the Divine plan is to be kind. (And just a bit of info  - Let God deal with that 'unpleasant' part of your life. He's better at it than we could ever be on our own.)

You see, I have learned that in the early stages of our lives as we grow or mature and develop... we would be engrossed in the I-Me-My-Mine of its living. Then it comes to this point when we are charged with a new direction:  to turn to others. In unselfish care, compassion, understanding, empathy, sympathy, and service. That includes all of creation. Give to others,  God will give you more.

How do we know? The Divine plan takes its course. In bits and pieces or sometimes in grander scale. You're part of it, like it or not.

But if course the free will is still there;  the choice is still up to you. But you still have to conquer it. 

God is a respecter of men and women. He always is. But He expects you to know the Divine plan, too.

Lifted from a Tagalog song:

Pananagutan 

Lyrics by Fr. E. P. Hontiveros

"Walang sinuman ang nabubuhay

Para sa sarili lamang

Walang sinuman and namamatay

Para sa sarili lamang

Tayong lahat ay may pananagutan sa isa't isa

Tayong lahat ay tinipon ng Diyos

Na kapiling nya

....."

Translation:

Nobody lives just for himself 

Nobody dies just for himself 

All of us are responsible for one another 

God has gathered everyone to be with Him 

.....

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YOU BRING ALL OF YOU TO THE WORD 'EMPATHY'

Two young girls, apparently students with their books and laptops open on the table, were arguing about the words empathy and sympathy. Apparently working on a lesson. Fortunately, the coffee shop was half empty as it was quite early for the usual coffee habitue's preferred hour. I was sitting at a table next to them with my usual favorite drink waiting for my daughter to finish with her errands inside the mall. So their voices riding on a pitch higher was no bother at all.
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Girl 1: "Use the word sympathy cos it's more personal'"
Girl 2: "Can't empathy mean the same thing?"

Well, I didn't wait to listen to how they resolved their problem in the end because I chose to turn off my radar at that particular point and focused on my green tea frappe. But those girls made me think.....
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Empathy. Sympathy. Easily one can get their meaning from a good dictionary. No big deal. Mr. Webster can help clear you through a hump down the grammar road.
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Let's not talk about grammar here though. "English is not our first language. But we do have a fair understanding of the language..... thanks to our exposure to it via the printed word, the movies, the media, and the Western world." So says a good friend. So there!
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If you would ask me, I like the word empathy. Why? It seems to me to have a much deeper connection and conviction. It's like all that you are is contained in that word. When you empathize you bring with it your own experiences, your own deep sentiments, your real understanding into that particular situation which another person is going through.
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You know what it is like; you've 'been there-done that'. So then you can understand better. As your own stack of wisdom and ability to connect expands and grows, is heightened, by another person's own set of dire experiences, you learn to respond with genuine care and concern. You see more, listen more, feel more, understand more, connect more, and act better. Or pray better.
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Then it even grows bigger to embrace all of nature, all living creatures, the vast universe, all of humanity, and the world.
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This quote (on empathy) sums it beautifully.....
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"She did not talk to people as if they were strange hard shells she had to crack open to get inside. She talked as if she were already in the shell. In their very shell." ----- Marita Bonner, "Nothing New" (1926), Frye Street and Environs (1987)
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You bring all of you, who-you-are and what-you-are, into the word empathy. So whenever you say "I understand." It's real because you truly do!
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Enjoy your Sunday, folks! God put in there blessings just for you.

EVEN THE SMALLEST ACT OF CARING CAN TURN A LIFE AROUND

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Somebody said this....  'The opposite of love is not hate;  it's indifference.'

Let's not fool ourselves with the thought that we know much about that word... indifference. Well, maybe or maybe not. Because in truth we don't or else we won't be doing these freaking habits of uncaring. Somewhere there in our day to day lives we do teeny weeny habits of having our noses up in the air or looking the other way or telling ourselves to simply just 'ignore'.

You know what, that isn't achieving anything at all except perhaps keep us safe or more entrenched in our perceived respective comfort zones. A friend asked me.... 'why bother with other stuff, it's our lives we should be worrying about..'  Why bother?  Oh my, that's the stuff wars, misunderstandings, cruelty, misery, division, isolation are made of.... and that too is a very good reason why civilizations stagnate or may disintegrate one day soon.

You know what else, life is such that we work at it yes BUT it doesn't stop there. Life also includes that obnoxious human being standing next to you, or an old man walking out on the streets in tattered clothes, or emaciated children looking up to your eyes with outstretched hands, or that woman on TV sobbing as she heartrendingly pleads for justice for her child raped and murdered, or recurring holdups - bag snatchings - senseless killings, or the death of a poor puppy in the hands of bad bad VERY bad humans, and even so much more. Include too our Mother Nature who cries every time we irresponsibly cut down her trees, dirty her rivers and streams with garbage, kill her animals for profit, or bulldoze down her majestic mountains to build buildings in the name of progress. We see them all and then look the other way. That's a lot of indifference going around, don't you think?

What can we do? Somebody said that evil thrives in a society when, to quote -- 'good people do nothing about it.'  Unquote. We're good people, right? So whoever wrote those lines must be referring to us.

So what can we do?? Simple. BEGIN TO CARE. Act on saving people, the community, the children and the elderly, the poor, the four-legged creatures in our midst. Act against injustice, thieves and murderers, crooked men and women in government and even those in our small day-to-day lives, act against the senseless destruction of our dear Mother Earth, act to protect our environment, and more. Act to save our world and its people ........  and in the process we are saving ourselves too.

Another friend asked ... 'I'd like to do something but WHAT?'  Here's a few I know.....  concertedly and vigorously talk about it, write about it, sing about it, work on it, network with it ...... be seen, be heard, be read. Be passionate about caring for all of creation, living and non-living.

If I may boldly say, I believe that God didn't create us just to stay in our respective comfortable tiny corners of the world separate from the rest. I think His intent was to create a humanity of men and women with big hearts of gold reaching out to one another with the power and love of God. We are created in His image, right?  Sadly, it got derailed somewhere there, not His fault but mainly ours. BUT we can get ourselves back on track again. And how? If we once again learn to put back CARING into our lives.

Indifference is an ugly word. Don't you think that it's time to cut it down to pieces, strike it off our vocabulary, end its rule over our lives??  That sure is going to put a tremendous smile on our Heavenly Father's face! We are His children.... therefore, like Father - like children.

Blessings, everyone.

LOOK FOR THE HELPERS

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I like this very much when I first saw it long ago.. and I'm bringing it here...... To quote:

Fred Rogers said:  

 “When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me,   "Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.”                                        

(Unquote)

It is easy to be angry, terrified, devastated, horrified by all that is terribly happening in our country and in other parts of the world. Catastrophes, killings, disasters, extreme poverty and hunger, greed and lies, graft, corruption, civil and political unrest, and a whole load more of bad things, to put it mildly.

But Fred Rogers is right.... 'look for the helpers..'  They come in different shapes, form, color, creed, sizes, gender, education or the lack of it, rich or poor, but you will see them out there getting their hands dirty helping..... or disregarding threat to their lives to bring out the truth...... or using their profession to help the least of our brothers....... or generously lending their time, energies, and resources to help build, preserve, save, heal, educate, protect, or whatever else is required for the greater number and better good.

Look for the helpers --- you will see them.
So what can we do where we are with who we are and what we have? 

Simple.

Talk about them... praise them... encourage them... catch them in action with your camera... write or blog about them... tell others about them... and if you have the chance then tell them straight how you appreciate what they do... and importantly, pray for them that they persevere in their noble kind and generous deeds. And if you are able to, join them.

Look for the helpers. Seek them out. Tell the world about them..... that good is still very much alive in our midst  Blessings!

STAY AND LISTEN

It's early evening and just got back from a lovely lunch and day with my daughter Christine and son-in-law Daniel who celebrated their 2nd anniversary. Imagine what lovely time it was with two families (from Las Pinas and Antipolo) sharing a sumptuous meal at Vikings!  Such wonderful blessings and a memorable day from a loving Father above. Thanks, Dad!

Then of course I'd check the blog; don't want to miss comments from my readers-friends -- replying to them promptly as I can make it. Next checked the inbox for emails. Hmmm... the usual things except for this one... one lovely person, a friend for quite a long time now, from the blog pouring out her heart so burdened by troubles. I don't think she wanted to find solutions from me but rather it was more just wanting a listening ear to her woes. I replied and sent off an earnest prayer in her direction. God will take care of her. I am sure. Positively!

You know what, we go through something similar to that at some point or other in our lives. And in those moments we sometimes long for or need someone who would be there for us, perhaps guide us walk through misery, lend us strength where ours has gone, or simply listen.

And if one day you find yourself being that person or being called for such Divine work..... stay and listen. But also remember this as you stay there and listen ......... it's not you but GOD who works in you or through you WHO is blessing your friend's soul.

Hope you're all having a wonderful weekend. Blessings!!

(Thanks to my friend, Mr. Quote Man, for the wonderful picture above.)

BOTHER TO CARE

'Why bother?' I heard a friend say that only recently. And couldn't get my mind off those words. When he said that he was not in a friendly mood... to himself, that is. Apparently something was bothering him. So maybe in frustration or irritation he uttered those words out of despair or surrender. I didn't try to find out those reasons because I thought it best that he sort it out himself. Besides he didn't seem inclined to reveal or consult or as the usual get it off his chest... as most people would.

But I thought again.

I think those words are so mean and unkind and unfeeling. Insensitive. 'Why bother' is like putting up a huge wall - a barrier - to keep out the 'unwanted' into your own 'hallowed' ground. Oh it's true that people have problems and that we are to mind our own business, or so we're told, if we are to keep our turf sane and safe. But that's just the big problem. We've been doing that for so long that we now have lost touch with feelings, emotions that go through the heart and mind of another person... who happens to be a human being too.

But why should we not connect with that anymore. Isn't it that whatever pain the other person goes through is so much the same as ours.. maybe only packaged differently? When he hurts, we feel that hurt - are familiar with it too because we've been through the same things before or are going through something like it in the present.

You know what, not everybody is very good at hiding his or her pain or difficulty... although they would certainly try. But it shows on faces, in the eyes, in the drooping mouth, in the silence of unspoken words that speak loudly. You can easily see through it all. Doesn't need a brilliant mind to do that.

But you know something else more? It takes a human heart to bother to care and offer his helping hand to the other. It takes the best of a person to bother to take time to lift up a person when he's down in the dump. It takes a human being to care over another human being. So, bother... cos you'll never know when one day a person at the receiving end of your giving could be your own.


(Photo sent by a friend)

WE DON'T HAVE TO BE SOMEBODY ELSE'S CROSS

When your bones ache, or your head does, or your insides rock and your limbs feel like crumbling... when nothing comes close to easing your pains, you feel like screaming your lungs out -- and you do! Well, maybe not literally but it finds its way in fury which is often meaninglessly and unnecessarily heaped upon the person or people near you or who by chance happen to be in its way. That's sad, because you have not only added to your misery but made others miserable too by yours.

Suffering in whatever form and of any kind is difficult. It is hard to imagine what goes on in that person's mind or what is being felt in the heart. Physical or emotional pain is a burden that runs deep and intense that it upsets everything else within and without. The strong are reduced to putty and the weak are made even weaker. The world seems to crumble down with that person along with it... or so he would think.

I will not venture to give advise on this matter because the lesson here is better understood when one has already mellowed in years and gained much in wisdom. But there are some though young are so blessed and filled with the spirit who would understand -- as the saints have shown us.

So what am I driving at here?

I am simply sharing an observation --- that people who suffer pain tend to vent their frustration and helplessness in serious expressions of anger. And this often leads to hurting others more than we imagine. But there is no point in bringing in other people into your suffering. They, just like the rest of humankind, have their own crosses to bear too. We all have and all do. Thus it would be best to remember what Maya Angelou once said.....

'I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one..'

HOW DO YOU SPELL -- GIVE

How do you spell the word 'give'?

It's spelled as ... c-o-m-p-a-s-s-i-o-n.

When you give, it simply means that you ---

--- clearly see, can understand, can relate, do sympathize, do care, do love -- the other

.....who may not be as bright, as well-positioned, as educated, as rich, as healthy, as well-dressed, or as beautiful as you are.

You give because you see the other person's need to receive.

And you respond as God responds.

Giving straight from the heart..... is the blueprint of GIVE... and of giving.

ANYWAY

I woke up to a fine morning, got up leisurely from my bed and sauntered over to the bedroom window ... looked out to the day-- it looked like it was going to be a good day despite the clearly overcast skies. Why? I don’t know. Maybe it’s a feeling one gets when everything within is peaceful, serene, and quite content. Not that nothing is bothersome or ‘kicking butt’ mine or somebody else’s, it’s just that some mornings do give us that ‘feel good’ feeling. Well, this is that particular morning.

Apparently the neighborhood has had a good head start getting on with the day’s routine of chores. I hear a neighbor’s washing machine spinning away with their usual laundry. Coming down the street are young children in their blue crisp uniforms on their way to school. Following not far behind are two housewives perhaps on their way to the market, too. (‘Wonder what they’re going to cook up for lunch today.) A car passing them slows briefly down to a halt; Mr. Perez, behind the wheel on his way to work, takes time to greet the ladies. Right across my window stands a proud mango tree with its trimmed branches (done ‘bout 2-3 months ago by Mr. Noble, my favorite neighbor) now growing new leaves in places where it used to be bare. And seen below at the foot of the tree is a small low-lying bush happily holding up its new blossoms for everyone to see. (‘Wonder though if people passing by do notice.)

Quite an ordinary scene repeated in many places everywhere. In fact, I think it’s down pat to routine, for the human part that is. As for nature, it does what it does best always --- live. So it really is this – that no matter the threat of terrorist bomb scares, a heavy downpour, or whether somebody is gravely sick or has died today – they’ll do it anyhow. People get on with their lives. Nature does the same. Even if war explodes this very minute, it won’t stop the roses from blooming. They’ll do it anyway.

In just the same manner, do the good that you want to do. Teach your students well, close that major contract for your company, minister to your sick patients, police your area, speak up for the underprivileged, serve in a civic program for the handicapped, or continue loving your unlovable friend. No matter how you may feel - or despite the risk of being misunderstood - or if friends tell you that you’re overextending yourself this time, do it anyway. It’s not meant to please anyone; it’s something you must do because you believe in it. And by the way, has it ever crossed your mind that God despite our unworthiness loves us anyway? Lovely, isn’t it?!

Read this poem late last night.....

ANYWAY
by Mother Theresa of Calcutta

People are often unconscious, illogical and self-centered
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish and ulterior motives
Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and true enemies
Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people will cheat you
Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight
Build anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow
Be good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough
Give the world the best you've got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God
It was never between you and them anyway.

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I HAVE LEARNED THAT.... Part 8

Looking back through the years much had happened in my life which certainly could be called as the ‘School of Hard Knocks’. Have you even seen a cartoon in which the leading character just unwittingly got him into a bunch of adventure and misadventure? That wherever he would turn he’d either come up against a thick wall or a steep mountain or perilous sea or some weird unexpected disaster? – Quite insurmountable in every way. That would be me.

But it wasn’t really that terrifying nor was it hopeless because every tale had a quite lovely ending. Credit goes to Someone up there.

What I’m driving at is in those times in-between or when the world seems to suddenly stop turning and you find yourself alone, lonely, isolated from the rest of humankind or so it seems... And something kicks so badly in your gut - That’s when you wish so hard that someone would stop awhile and hold your hand and tell you that everything will be alright - Even if you very well know that it’s farther from the truth. But no matter because all that you ever need and want in that moment is just to have someone to hold your hand and understand.

But of course we don’t say it out loud, do we? We would rather hope and wish in the silence of our hearts that someone would read our minds and see what we see or look deep into our hearts and feel what we feel. How we wish that they won’t be afraid to be there when needed or share that one precious moment of vulnerability of the soul. Is that too much to ask for?

I have learned that sometimes all that a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.

(P.S. The picture there is courtesy of Malen's cam-phone.)