And Then I Became Really Angry

Remember when I wrote this post about how upset I was with the hospital the day of my mom's surgery?  

I have come to the conclusion that there are some people in the health care profession that shouldn't be there.   In the good old days, when dinosaurs roamed the earth, and I was a wee elementary school aged child, there was a thing called COMPASSION.  I remember our doctor would make house calls.  They cared about you.  Even better, the nursing staff was wonderful. 

Now don't get me wrong, there are a lot of nurses that will go over and above the call of duty.  Like Kimberly at All Work And No Play Makes Mommy Go Something Something.  Here is a health care professional that was trying to help save someones life and got hurt in the process.  Only to have the hospital where she worked make her life a living hell, and now is in constant pain from the back injury.  

We need more people like her.  

My mom was supposed to be FINALLY getting her hip ball and socket put back in today.  It was cancelled.  They have been giving her blood thinners since her last surgery and, oh my goodness, her blood is too thin to do the surgery.  What?  Really?  Then why didn't you take her off the freaking cumin or cuminden or whatever the hell it is called a couple of days ago?  Now my mom has to wait 5 more days.

Why is this a big deal you ask?  Because, there are people in the health care field that shouldn't be.  I don't even know why there are nurses anymore.  From what I can see, the only thing they have to do is give out the pills and change dressings.

The rest of the care is now done by the CNA's.  As in all things, there are good and there are bad.   My mom has had her share of the bad, and it makes it a little bit worse because SHE HAS NO FREAKING HIP!!!!!  What part of that do these health care providers not understand.  It's like her leg is just hanging there.  It hurts when she moves it.  Why?  Because it is pulling on all the muscles and tendons and such.


Another thing that is really truly bothering me.  Health care providers are used to urine and poop.  To them it is no big deal.  Human anatomy and all that.  

Most people have dignity and find this to be something they don't want to have people help them do.  Especially their children.   When you have to go, you have to go.  When you don't answer the "call button" people will try to get there.  This one CNA has been a totally rotten person when treating my mom.  I wasn't there the last time, but my brother was.  They pushed the call button and no one came.  Finally mom sent him out to find someone.  He came back and said, she said she couldn't come right now she was doing something else.  My mom said, I have to go.  We are not talking peeing people.  She has come to the point that she will just do that in the depends if she has to.  My brother had to help her in to the wheelchair, get her into the bathroom, help her get out of the depends and get on the toilet.  FINALLY Miss Don't Bother Me With Your Bathroom Problems, came in and starting getting mad at my mom.  "I can't just drop everything whenever you need something".

My mom has finally had enough.  To her, it is one thing to have her daughters help her, but for her son to have to take part in something like this, totally upset her.  She started screaming at the girl to get the hell out of the bathroom and never come back to her room.  I'm sure the rest of the wing heard it.   I am so upset right now.  I feel it is my fault she is there.  We picked this rehab place because it was close to me, and would make it easier for me to get there everyday.  She told me she was glad I wasn't there because she knew that I would have been arrested, I would have blown a gasket.  She is also pleading with me to not yell at people today when I go over.

I won't scream, I won't yell, I can't guarantee that I won't swear.  I will talk to every administrator there today if that is what it takes.

It scares me to think that there are people there that don't have family members coming to help them.  I'm not just going to be fighting for my mom's rights today, but every patient there.

I am very grateful for the staff that has been nothing but good to my mom and the other patients.   They will get my respect, and my praises to the administrators.

The others, well, watch out.  Dazee is on the warpath!

Because I Like To Keep You Informed

In my continuing quest to help you with things that are very important for you to know, I happened upon the following.

What the Insurance Companies Really Don't Want Us To Know.

I know, right.  I always thought your car was either towed away or you just kept driving it while waiting to get enough money for your deductible to get it fixed.  Apparently we have been misled.  All we have to do is wash the darn thing.  Who wudda known.
Sunday night, in the movie theater that is called Dazee's Brain, I had this dream.  Mr. Dazee and I were at a preseason game for the Utah Jazz.  Sidebar:  You all know how I feel about the poor, pitiful, underpaid NBA players.  The big cry baby sissy faces.Anyweirdnesslater, we are sitting there when the President of the Utah Jazz, Randy Rigby, announces over the jumbotron."It is my extreme pleasure to announce, that the new Head Couch for the Utah Jazz is"
DAZEE DREAMER
And the crowd goes wild.  I look at Mr. Dazee in amazement.  It reminded me of a movie that I like, Eddie, with Whoopi Goldberg.  If you watch this clip, that is totally how I would be.  No really, I would.  Ask my family. of course, this clip is before she is made the head coach.  But you see what I mean.
Now, quit your laughing, it could happen.  Or not. :)

It's A Fracking Public Service Announcement!

What a wonderful day.  Friday, the last day of my work week, and the day I let the fracks rip.  Thanks again to Christy and Boobies for hosting FUF for me to get my weekly frustrations out.

Today, is a very special frack day.  I have done a vlog.  Yes, I know, scary, but lucky for you, my face isn't in it much.  

Please enjoy

I think that says it all for the week.  
Have a good one.

What Were They Thinking......?

This is your car.........

This is your car on crack...........

Any Questions?

This public service message brought to you today by

Dude, what are all these cutout's in the road, and why are there orange and white things around them?

Photo taken by my very own camera Friday June 17, 2011 during lunch.  

Dazee's Public Service - Weird Laws From Around The Globe

In my continuing saga of trying to make us all a bit smarter, today we will be learning some more laws.  Our first chapter was all about the different State laws in America.

Today, I went to my best friend Google and found this article.  It seems to be picking on the UK, but other countries are getting hit too.

It is illegal for a cab in the City of London to carry rabid dogs or corpses.

And with good reason.  Can you imagine the smell in those cabs.  Yikes.

It is illegal to die in the Houses of Parliament.

What if it is just dying of boredom.  Or dying from laughing at those silly white wigs.  Wait, do they still wear them?  Sorry, don't be freaking dying in the Houses of Parliament, it's illegal!!!

It is an act of treason to place a postage stamp bearing the British monarch upside down.

Oh my.  I can see it now.  Mrs Dazee, you must come with us.  You put your postage stamp on upside down.  But Mr Popo, I was delirious with fever, I knew not what I did.  Maybe you just should never put a return address on the  envelope for that very reason.

In France, it is forbidden to call a pig Napoleon.

Unless you are super pissed off, then I say, go for it. *evil laugh*

Under the UK’s Tax Avoidance Schemes Regulations 2006, it is illegal not to tell the taxman anything you don’t want him to know, though you don’t have to tell him anything you don’t mind him knowing.

I don't know about you, but I just heard Charlie Browns teacher on this law, blah-blah-blah-blah.  No comprenday.

In Alabama, it is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while driving a vehicle.

 You know, I'm getting a little bit tired of Alabama taking away all the fun of driving. 

In Ohio, it is against state law to get a fish drunk.

Now that is just unfair.  Maybe the fish had a bad day.  Maybe, he got laid off from his job.  Maybe he just needed to have a few to relax.  That does it, not moving to Ohio.

In the UK, a pregnant woman can legally relieve herself anywhere she wants – even, if she so requests, in a policeman’s helmet.

All pregnant ladies of the UK unite!!!  On Friday, June 10, 2011, go find the nearest policeman and request that you just have to pee in his helmet. :)  PS:  please post pictures.

In Miami, Florida, it is illegal to skateboard in a police station.

Damn, that was on my list of things to do this summer.

In Indonesia, the penalty for masturbation is decapitation.

Ok, just wow. 

In England, all men over the age of 14 must carry out two hours of longbow practice a day.

Yeah, what they said.

In San Salvador, drunk drivers can be punished by death before a firing squad.

Ummm, but, alrighty then.

In the UK, a man who feels compelled to urinate in public can do so only if he aims for his rear wheel and keeps his right hand on his vehicle.

 Because, do men usually use 2 hands while urinating?

In Florida, unmarried women who parachute on Sundays can be jailed.

My question is, is there some kind of hook-up thing going on 30000 feet above the earth.  If so, I'm in.

In Kentucky, it is illegal to carry a concealed weapon more than six-feet long.

Let's put this in perspective shall we.  Kristen Johnson, the blond amazon woman on the show 3rd Rock from the Sun, is 6 feet tall.  Try concealing her.

In Boulder, Colorado, it is illegal to kill a bird within the city limits and also to “own” a pet – the town’s citizens, legally speaking, are merely “pet minders”.

Okey Dokey, all you "pet minders" out there.  Don't be killing a bird in the city limits.  Got it?

In Vermont, women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth.

Not even going to go there.

In London, it is illegal to flag down a taxi if you have the plague.

Phew, glad to know that.

In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman’s genitals but is forbidden from looking directly at them during the examination; he may only see their reflection in a mirror.

I'm surprised in Bahrain they even allow women to go to a male doctor.  What?

 

I must go now and wash my eyes out.  Reading some of these have made me want to forget I ever saw them.

 

Be prepared, test on Thursday

One Adam Twelve.....See The Man

Yesterday I made a little trip to beautiful, downtown Salt Lake.  While speeding traveling at the posted speed limit, I looked over to sidewalk and saw that Salt Lake's Finest were out in force. 

Of course, being that I have the Dazee brain, I got thinking, what happens when they are called to the scene of a crime. 

"One Adam Twelve, see the man in the alley"

"10-4"

They turn their little sirens on, which I'm sure are very, very loud, kind of sounding like a bike bell.  Or, maybe not.

*Peddling their little hearts out*

ding-ding

*peddle, peddle*

ding-ding

Pedestrians pulling over to the side of the sidewalk. 

A young punk thinking he can outrun the bikes. 

A wild chase ensues.  More and more cop bikes join in. 

*ding-ding*

The news helicopters buzz overhead

"We interrupt our regularly scheduled programming for Breaking News"

People are glued to their televisions.

A viewer recognizes the runner.

"Please, please, don't hurt him, he's a good boy"

He is tackled to the ground.

A reporter shoves a microphone in his face

"why were you running?"

With a huge smile on his face he says

"Because................,"

Frack, What A Week!

Oh, My, Goodness.  This has been a week.  Where do I begin, to tell the story of what.....oops, wrong song.  Hooking up with Christy and Boobies, because, well, you see, I have a few things to get off my chest.

Speak of a freaking wet week.  Frack you mother nature.  I recorded this video yesterday because we were on our 3rd straight day of rain.  No end in sight.  Don't worry, Mr. Dazee already knows I'm a wack job.  I did warn him I was going to do it.  Just don't watch it honey.   

 I'm a smidge weird.  But hey, it's the rains fault.  Or mother nature's.  Whomever you feel like blaming. :) But hey, check out this even wackier dude.  Yesterday morning, with the rain POURING down, look what zoomed by me.

Notice how well you can see the road and the other drivers.  What?  You can't.  Yeah, say it with me, Dumb A motorcycle dude.  What the frack was he thinking?

Now for the non weather related news of the week. 

I need to give myself a big ole frack you for opening mouth, inserting foot award.

My mouth DOES NOT listen to my brain.  Or better yet, my brain is super mad at my mouth, because it doesn't tell it to not say EVERY, FREAKING, THING that is on my mind.  I want to give a big ole apology to my kids, their spouses, and my grandkids for talking about my funeral.  I will just put it all on a word document so they can find it at the appropriate time.  And ouch, my teeth are digging a big ole hole in my tongue now.  They are trying to help the brain/mouth fight.

I got this new chair at work. 

Yes, it's one of those cool, mesh, make my back feel good kind of chairs.  One thing you need to know.  Think of it as a Dazee Public Service Announcement. 

Do not, I repeat, DO NOT, fart while sitting in this chair. 

It does not hide any "signs" of what you just did.  If you do let one rip, by all means, pray with all your might that someone does not come into your office before the room clears out.  You're welcome.

Lastly, but certainly not leastly (its a word, I consulted Dazee Dictionary), I am hereby going to prove to all of you that thought I was a devil woman, that you  thought right.

Horns and all.  :)

Dazee's Public Service - State Laws You Should Be Aware Of

I decided that since the summer vacation season is soon upon us, I would help you out with a few little laws you should know about if you are planning on traveling to another State other than your own. 

You're welcome.  :)

ALABAMA

Boogers may not be flicked into the wind.
but it's ok to just drop them on the ground

ALASKA, Juneau

Owners of flamingos may not let their pet into barber shops
call me crazy, but I don't think of flamingos when thinking of Alaska

ARIZONA, Prescott

No one is permitted to ride their horse up the stairs of the county court house
damn, and I was all set to go to Arizona by horseback

ARKANSAS, Little Rock

Dogs may not bark after 6 PM
wow, those are some well trained dogs

CALIFORNIA, Blythe

You are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows
I guess they are taking cow-boy literal here

COLORADO, Sterling

Cats may not run loose without having been fit with a taillight
have you ever tried fitting a cat with a taillight?  good luck with that

CONNECTICUT, Hartford

You aren’t allowed to cross a street while walking on your hands
there goes that great idea I had

DELAWARE, Rehoboth Beach

Alcohol may not be served in nightclubs if dancing is occurring on the premises at the same time
alrighty then

FLORIDA

You may not fart in a public place after 6 PM
save it for you car, like I did while dating Mr. Dreamer.  what?

GEORGIA

No one may carry an ice cream cone in their back pocket if it is Sunday
rest of the week is just fine

HAWAII

Coins are not allowed to be placed in one’s ears
other body parts are just fine

IDAHO, Boise

Residents may not fish from a giraffe’s back
wow, must be a huge giraffe population in Boise

ILLINOIS, Chicago

The Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire
gosh, they take all the fun out of dining out

INDIANA

Baths may not be taken between the months of October and March
ummm, well that just stinks!!

IOWA, Marshalltown

Horses are forbidden to eat fire hydrants
well, you've heard the saying, you can lead a horse to water, but you can't let it eat the hydrant :)

KANSAS, Derby

Hitting a vending machine that stole your money is illegal
they must have way bad overcrowding in their jails.  just sayin

KENTUCKY, Fort Thomas

Dogs may not molest cars
not...even...going...there

LOUISIANA

It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol
this is a holdup, squirt-squirt

MAINE, Freeport

It is illegal to expectorate from any second-story window
and because they used such a big word, I had to look it up

to eject or expel matter, as phlegm, from the throat or lungs by coughing or hawking and spitting; spit
I'd like to see an "it is illegal to expectorate anywhere" law

MARYLAND, Rockville

Persons may not swear while on the highway
that's it, Maryland is off my vacation schedule!!

MASSACHUSETTS

Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked
so, not, fair

MICHIGAN, Detroit

It is illegal to let your pig run free in Detroit unless it has a ring in its nose
well that's just unjust discrimination by darn

MINNESOTA, Cottage Grove

 Airplanes may not be landed in city parks
but crashing is totally ok

MISSISSIPPI, Tylertown

It is unlawful to shave in the center of main street
totally going to try getting away with that one

MISSOURI, Columbia

You can not have a antenna exposed outside of your house yet you can have a 25′ satellite dish
it's called priorities people

MONTANA

It is illegal to have a sheep in the cab of your truck without a chaperone
because what happens with the sheep in Montana, stays in Montana :)

NEBRASKA

If a child burps during church, his parent may be arrested
they take their religion serious in that thar state

NEVADA, Elko

Everyone walking the streets is required to wear a mask
that is just scary

NEW HAMPSHIRE

Any cattle that crosses state roads must be fitted with a device to gather its feces
or have little clowns following behind them, like the horses do in the parades

NEW JERSEY

It is against the law for a man to knit during the fishing season
because nothing is more relaxing than knittin and fishin at the same time

NEW MEXICO, Deming

Hunting is prohibited in Mountain View Cemetery
all other cemetery's are open season

NEW YORK

Citizens may not greet each other by “putting one’s thumb to the nose and wiggling the fingers”
well, I never!!!

NORTH CAROLINA

Elephants may not be used to plow cotton fields
ummm, is there zoo animals on the loose in these states or what

NORTH DAKOTA

It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep with your shoes on
but what if they have narcolepsy?

OHIO, Paulding

A policeman may bite a dog to quiet him
must have some mighty burly policemen

OKLAHOMA, Tulsa

You may not open a soda bottle without the supervision of a licensed engineer
sounds like a "licensed engineer" was on the city council

OREGON

Dishes must drip dry
hey, was my mom from Oregon?

PENNSYLVANIA

A person is not eligible to become Governor if he/she has participated in a duel
I guess it is the whole murder is a felony thing

RHODE ISLAND

Ropes may not be strung across a highway
but how else are they going to stop traffic

SOUTH CAROLINA

It is perfectly legal to beat your wife on the court house steps on Sundays
ok, I just kind of want to try this one out for fun.  try arresting me fella's, I'll win the case

SOUTH DAKOTA, Fountain Inn

Horses are to wear pants at all times
anyone looking to make some good money in Fountain Inn, here's a great business venture 

TENNESSEE, Memphis

It is illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians
that is just mean

TEXAS, Port Arthur

Obnoxious odors may not be emitted while in an elevator
just don't get stuck in one, as evidenced in my post on wednesday

UTAH

It is illegal NOT to drink milk
oh I know some people that are so breaking this law

VERMONT

Women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth
but????

VIRGINIA

There is a state law prohibiting “corrupt practices of bribery by any person other than candidates
and this is surprising because.......?

WASHINGTON, Wilbur

You may not ride an ugly horse
but whomever came up with this law should be kicked by an ugly horse

WEST VIRGINIA, Alderson

One may not walk a lion, tiger or leopard, even on a leash
what the hell people?

WISCONSIN, Racine

Missiles may not be shot at parade participants
that just took all the fun out of the parade

WYOMING

You may not take a picture of a rabbit from January to April without an official permit
I don't even know what to say

There you have it.  You will thank me when you don't get arrested because you were warned.