Dalawampu't Limang Ako (2K9 Remix)

Ang tag na ito ay galing sa kasamahan nating blogger na si Aris. Bilang isa sa kanyang mga tagahanga, isang karangalan ang mapabilang sa mga taong nais niyang makilala ng lubusan. Ang mga sumusunod ay dalawampu't limang mga bagay tungkol sa akin.

1. Tatlong beses sa isang linggo ako kung magbuhat. Sa Eclipse iyon sa Shaw Boulevard. Maraming cute at magaganda ang katawan sa gym namin, pero higit na palakaibigan ako doon sa mga bagong dating na tabain ang katawan. Lagi ko kasing naalala kung paano ako nagsimula sa gym na iyon.

2. Sa kabila ng kakayahan kong makipaglandian kung kani-kanino, higit na tumino ako nang magkaroon ng korte ang katawan ko. Kung papasok man ako sa isang relasyon, asahan mong monogamous ako sa kabila ng mga temptation na maaring magtulak sa akin upang ilabas ang kalibugan sa iba.

3. Natutulog ko ng nakahubad at laging bukas ang TV.

4. Sa sobrang babaw ng kaligayahan ko, ang makasaksi ng paglubog ng araw sa hapon ay sapat na upang makapagpaligaya sa akin. Gayun din ang makakita ng bituin sa langit tuwing hatinggabi.

5. Mga paborito kong gulay: Malunggay, Okra, Baby Corn, Mushroom at Cauliflower.

6. Comfort food ko lately ang Binalot.

7. Kinikilala ako ng mga tropa bilang isang pakawalang lalaki. Ibig sabihin, kapag gusto kong umalis sa isang pagtitipon, walang makakapigil sa akin saan ko man gusto pumunta. Pahirapan rin sa akin ang magpatali. Subalit kapag gusto ko ang isang tao, literal na nahahawakan niya ako sa leeg.

8. Halata mo na ako'y umiibig kapag nagsimulang maging alternative ang playlist ng mp3 ko. Kapag hindi sumasablay ang pagkanta ko ng mga alternative songs sa videokehan, ibig sabihin, nasa paligid lang ang aking mahal.

9. Pasayawin mo na ako kesa pakantahin. Kailangan ko muna tumumba sa kalasingan bago mapakanta ng maayos.

10. I often write in Filipino when I'm suffering from a writer's block.

11. Sobrang gusto ko magroad trip. Minsan nakikicar-pool ako sa mga kaibigan para lang maka-ikot ng buong Manila sa kanilang sasakyan.

12. Pwede naman gamitin ang sasakyan namin sa bahay para dito, subalit hindi ako marunong mag-drive.

13. Size 12 ang sapatos ko. Kapag nababanggit ko ito sa mga prospects, madalas ay lumiliwanag ang kanilang mga mukha.

14. Hindi ako naniniwala sa langit at impyerno. Mas pipiliin ko pa ang konsepto ng reincarnation.

15. Sa kabila nito, makikita mo akong taimtim na nagrorosaryo sa Santa Clara sa Katipunan tuwing day off.

16. Antukin akong tao. Kahit saan kaya ko matulog. Huwag lang sa mabahong lugar.

17. Marami ang nagsasabi na magaling akong humalik. Ayoko man magbuhat ng bangko pero dalangin ko na ito'y hindi bola.

18. Hindi ako nakakatagal sa ibang bahay ng higit sa dalawang araw. Kung magoovernight man, dapat dala ko ang kumot galing sa kama kung hindi ay mamamahay ako.

19. Favorite Shampoo: Clear. Favorite Soap: Dial Favorite Facial Care Product: Nivea For Men (Yung Green) Favorite Deodorant: Axe Gravity

20. Ayaw na ayaw kong mag-malling. Kung may bibilhin man ako, diretso kaagad sa pupuntahan sabay sibat kapag nabili ko na ang kailangan.

21. Pero pangarap ko mag-grocery kasama ang aking future lover. Tapos yung lahat ng pinamili namin ay ilalagay sa trunk ng kanyang sasakyan. Tapos yung mga grocery ay para sa bahay. Tapos papakilala ko siya sa nanay ko na kasama kong namili sa Puregold.

22. Gusto kong makarating ng Ilocos, Batanes, Cebu, at Tawi-Tawi.

23. Mahilig lang ako magsulat pero tamad akong magbasa. Natatakot kasi ako na kapag nahilig akong magbasa ay tamarin na rin ako magsulat.

24. Out ako sa kaisa-isa kong barkadang straight. Puro sila lalaki at sa kabila ng aking preference, mukhang tinanggap na nila ako.

25. Lima ang grupo ko na mga PLU: Outsiders (PEx) Hanap Barkada (PEx), Alliance (Blog) Encantadia (G4M) at Tripper's Clan (PEx) . Wala ni isa man sa mga grupong ito ang regular na nakakasama ko sa clubbing.

I am tagging Dabo, Lukayo, Blakrabit, Maxwell, Darwin at ang sweet pea ko na si Mel Beckham

Stripperella Redux

What is with these muscular men who strip down, aim their digital cameras on their toned and ripped bodies, take shots of it in different lights and angles and then upload it on the internet to serve as their avatars? Have we become so attached to aesthetics that it precedes sensibilities as our emissary in cyberspace?

Some would explain that they are just trying to preserve their anonymity. Good point. After all, most of these guys live a double-life. Deep-down, their human instinct emerges and it yearns for a unique identity that will reinforce their presence online. But is this all the reason they could come up with? Addressing the issue of anonymity is easy. One can remain anonymous by wearing his favorite shirt or blurring his face and then putting it as his avatar.

But no. These guys would still get tempted to expose their well-sculpted physique in order to convey a subliminal message to others.

And as a non-straight masculine guy for seven years, I know exactly what they are trying to say.

I remember my first year in guys4men.

Back then, I was on the plus side. Not knowing the culture of the hook-up site I found myself in, I placed a face-picture as my main profile. I tried to befriend the guys I found interesting. Obviously, most of these guys are the ones whose main profile appear above so sex was never my intention. In those days, I already understood the unspoken hierarchy among gays which I tried to disprove. I sent them cordial private messages expressing my desire to communicate. These short letters would include the phrases "ang ganda ng katawan mo," or "hingi naman ng tips paano maachieve ang physique mo" or base my opening statements according to what they have written in their profiles. Unfortunately very few would reply. One even blocked me after telling this guy how I found him astig. Those who would answer back would just thank you for the compliment and then ignore you when attempting to engage them in a conversation. It's a harsh world I tell you. No wonder, some members would create threads about why guys would ignore them when they are physically unappealing. I tried consoling these poor souls by telling them my personal exprience.

I learned from the Arclight experiment how things turn around when you have the looks, body built and sensible appeal to sway over other guys to your hemisphere. As some of you have read in my earlier entries, Arclight was a faux-profile created by stealing a photo from another guy I found on Friendster. I made his character so impressive, that it was the guys who have the body-to-die-for who send him face-pictures just to win his favor. The experiment was so effective that it inspired me to become the profile I used to stalk on others.

In two years, I was able to catch up with Arclight. I may not have the appeal to win over his worshippers but my last reincarnation was able to engage the ones who would ignore me when it was my plus-sized avatar who sent them private messages. The formula was simple really: to get their attention, you must become one of them.

So I stripped down exposing my skin. It wasn't as toned as theirs. I don't have big biceps to use for intimidation nor a pumped up chest or six-pack abs to impress my physique on others. My avatar was enough to give an impression of a masculine guy trying to communicate with another masculine guy.

Somehow they understood my message.

One thing about PLUs of these types is that they are more defensive than their average counterparts. With their inboxes often flooded with senseless invitations of hook-ups or messages with prematurely romantic overtones, they tend to put up higher barriers and walls to separate those who just desire them sexually from those who would really take them seriously. If it is a carnal or romantic engagement, they would choose an equal or someone who is better. If it is a friendly banter, they would at least pick someone who could see them eye to eye:

Someone who crops their head, exposes their fit bodies and write short and conscise blurbs in their profiles.

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This is how things are being done between two physically imposing guys trying to recognize each other's dominance.

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And so the habit went on, spreading from one online forum to another. A guy out-guying another guy showing his naked body in an attempt to subtly catch the person he seeks the attention. It is a subliminal expression of teritoriality over a space he considers his own; an ancient behavior of dominance that others would acknowledge and respect. It is a display of strength and manhood so that others will never see him as a pushoever, especially in potentially hostile places like hook-up sites or online forums about fitness and health.

It is a tool of attraction; a recognition of his highly sexual nature.

I don't know if others think the same way.

But the moment I strip down - whether in the dance floor or in the profiles - it is the dominant I, who emerges.

Proximus

How do you keep a memory from being forgotten? The answer may be as myriad as the dry leaves falling from a tree. They scatter on the ground, with each leaf representing a moment in one's life. We are the tree, whose memory is as old as time itself. Choosing what to remember is like swaying our branches for the wind to pass over. Old leaves might be blown away, but it is the tree rings inside our trunk that keep our moments remembered.

Remembering comes in different shades and colors. While others do portraits of scenes, a photo snapshot of a moment may preserve an event for all eternity. Memories might be kept inside one's head, but its reliability might fall into question. For people like us, whose love affair with letters is as eternal as one's lifetime, we weave words in hopes that stories left written elsewhere will make us remember what was, was.

A few days ago, I stumbled on an old, online depository of memory which people from Pinoyexchange call the Wireless Journal. The WJ is a mobile service where one's thoughts can be expressed in a form of a text message. Once sent, it travels at a speed of light where it is stored and arranged in one thread, whose owner can read every time he wishes to reminisce.

My Wireless Journal represents an epoch of my life. Its avatar Proximus, was an angst-ridden kid who seeks meaning out of a life suspended in mid-air. Being the waiting successor to a business empire built on sex, news and sensationalism, he spent his days exploring his new-found sexuality while confessing a romantic feeling he could not express to his bestfriend. He whines about his erratic and often 12-hour work schedule and savors long-distance travels around Luzon. He finds solace in journeys only to get bored with destinations.

What's interesting about Proximus is the life he once had. His frustrations at work remind everyone that he is just a kid forced to assist his father run their family business. His love-hate relationship with his father reveals that despite their animosity, which Pulsar had written later in the blog, they had a bond which he could always look back and treasure. He wrote of people he met along his journey. While most of them had already exited his life, three stayed on to become a part of his present. His sexual repressions and hopeless romanticism might have echoed a very different person, (he only got de-virginized on page 37, and had his first taste of m2m relationship only on page 46) Proximus clearly shows the connection why it takes Mugen, Darkstar and Pulsar to serve as balance when romantic emotions or lust assault my heart.

Reading through Proximus, I realize how bored and restless I was in those days.

The Wireless Journal spans from the third month I crossed preference. It saw my ups (falling madly in-love with PK) and downs (the family business being stripped of its assets after the government forcibly stopped its operations). It witnessed my attempts to reach out to people like me, and my first introduction to the gay club scene alone. What is fascinating about the entries posted is that they were spontaneously thought. There were no rules involved and pure honesty is the only requirement. Unfortunately, Pinoyexchange discontinued the service less than a year after I subscribed to it. Had WJ remained online a little longer, Proximus would have also witnessed the first time I became emancipated from a gay relationship.

The rest was history.

A year later, the Pulsar blog began and it wrote mostly about my relationship with Phanks. It evolved and spawned animated alter-egos which represent the author's innermost thoughts in the face of emotional deadlocks. The evolution did not stop there. While technology offers more innovations on how to leave one's mark in history, the hunger for remembrance remains wanting. Five years after Proximus left its trace in the Wireless Journal, its reincarnation Hakken began leaving its traces in Twitter.

The pursuit of immortality indeed is a lifelong passion.

In leaving my footprints scattered all over the internet, the effort of many years of writing roller coaster emotions that seem so incoherent in those days now make sense. Proximus was a 20-year old bisexual kid when he wrote of my existence many years ago, Looking back, now that I am reading the countless entries I sent in the Wireless Journal - all those dreams, heartaches and sudden bouts of repressed lust of my youth - it seems like everything happened just yesterday.

It's like rediscovering a nearly-forgotten life and savoring its essence, knowing those moments will never happen again.

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it all started wid words, which end n sentences, overdosed wid emotions, born wid tears that may never be cried. every meetings are partings, every places we go become witness to our story. memories are forever with u, dreams are eternity when u are close to me. i am a poem that is written in ur pages

while you, PK is the sweetest lyrics that make up my song.

- Proximus, August 18, 2002

PK is Roy aka Jollieboie.

The Super-Emo Blog Awards 2008

At dahil madilip ang kalangitan na may panaka-nakang pagkulog at pagkidlat, samantalang ang mga kalsada naman ay lubog pa rin sa baha at ang mga tao ay nagmamadaling umuwi sa kani-kanilang mga bahay sa takot na maabutan ng ulan, ako na naiwan sa isang cubicle na walang kausap at pigang-piga na sa sobrang bagal ng internet connection na siyang dahilan ng aking pagkabitin sa panonood ng XTUBE ay kasalukuyang naghahanap ng blade na ipangla-laslas ng aking pulso.

Motherpackingshet! Pagod na akong mabuhay!!

Mabuti na lamang at bago ang aking pamamaalam ay nahikayat ako ni Loudcloud na bumoto muna para sa PROJECT LAFFTRIP LAFFAPALOOZA. Ito ay sa gayong mabawasan naman ang mga super-emo na katulad ko at ang pumalit sa aming trono ay ang mga patawang kagaya ng mga iboboto ko.

RULEZZZ

Pumili ng mga blogs na nakakatawa. (mahigpit na ipinagbabawal ang blog ni Tripper at ni Macoy sa kategoryang ito)

Tatlo hanggang sa limang blog lang ang pwedeng iboto.

Ipost sa sariling blog ang mga napiling mga blogs with matching links.

I-link si Badoodles sa iyong entry.

Mag-iwan ng comment sa kwentongbarbero.com upang ipaalam na sumali kayo sa kanilang pa-contest.

Sabi nila may pa-premyo daw na P15,000 kapag nabunot ang raffle entry mo. Ewan ko kung stir ito pero maglalaslas talaga ako kapag nagoyo ako sa pakulong ito.

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1. My Dear Diarya: Maraming beses ko na binalak magpakamatay subalit ito ay nauudlot sa tuwing nababasa ko ang blog ni Mr. Diaz. Paano ba naman kasi, sa punchlines pa lang tawa na ako ng tawa. Tawagin niyo na akong mababaw pero sadyang mababaw lang talaga ang kiliti ko sa tinggil.

2. Chiksilog: Actually, ngayon ko pa lang siya nabasa so medyo nag-aadjust pa ako sa kanyang humor level. Subalit dahil siya ang pambato ng idolo kong si Mr. Diaz at Loudcloud, kasama na rin siya sa iboboto ko (kasama na rin dito ang pag-link sa kanyang blog.)

3. Mandaya Moore-Orliz: Turo sa akin ng aking lolah (with an H) na ang buhay parlorista ay hindi katawa-tawa. Pero dahil napapangiti ako sa tuwing nakikita ko ang feektures nina Red, Patricia, Glydel, at Fiona pinapaalala sa akin ni binibining Mandaya na ang buhay bading ay hindi lamang umiikot sa mundo ng Malate, bagkus may malaking mundo doon pa sa dako kung saan ang mga bayot sa bukid ay namumuhay ng mapayapa... at masaya.

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So hayun. Sa halip na i-promote ang totoong Emo Blog Awards dito kung saan kami-kami lang naman nina Wanderer at Dabo ang magiging runaway winners, dito na ako sa pakulo ng mga bloggers kung saan may tsansa talaga akong mabunot at umuwi ng may tumataginting na 15K sa aking Metrobank account.

May bonus pa akong laughtrip long enough para ipagpaliban muna ang aking paglalaslas sa susunod na pagkakataon.

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PS: Sabi ni Mr. Diaz hanggang sa September 20 lang daw ang botohan dito. Anupang iniintay niyo, join na!

Orgy

At dahel ti-nag ako ni Mrs. Mel Beckham-Atienza at dahel inaabangan ko ang blog niya, sasagot ako sa meme na ito.

Instructions:
What you are supposed to do.
And please don't spoil the fun.

In short, 'wag kang nega! woot!

Click copy/paste, type in your answers and tag four people in your list. Don't forget to change my answers to the questions with that of your own.

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(A) Four places I go to over and over:

office
diliman
eclipse
quatro

(B) Four people who email me regularly:

rapidshare
suzanne the lottery girl
tommy and his wonder pills
dr. bennie mandisi, regional director, bank of nigeria

(C) Four of my favourite places to eat:

kowloon house
kfc
bestfriend's tapsihan
kulang ako ng isa. bihira ako kumain sa labas.

(D) Four places you'd rather be:

iceland
batanes
boston
new zealand

(E) Four people I think will respond:

Ron
Odin
Luke
Lance

(F) Four tv shows I could watch over and over again:

invader zim
as told by ginger
yuyu hakusho
gto (great teacher onizuka)

That's all.

The Question Is Why

You are the Hanged Man

Self-sacrifice, Sacrifice, Devotion, Bound.

With the Hanged man there is often a sense of fatalism, waiting for something to happen. Or a fear of
loss from a situation, rather than gain.

The Hanged Man is perhaps the most fascinating card in the deck. It reflects the story of Odin who offered himself as a sacrifice in order to gain knowledge. Hanging from the world tree, wounded by a spear, given no bread or mead, he hung for nine days. On the last day, he saw on the ground runes that had fallen from the tree, understood their meaning, and, coming down, scooped them up for his own. All knowledge is to be found in these runes.

The Hanged Man, in similar fashion, is a card about suspension, not life or death. It signifies selflessness, sacrifice and prophecy. You make yourself vulnerable and in doing so, gain illumination. You see the world differently, with almost mystical insights.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

Tagged By A Bullfrog

Since Joms has been tagged and has arrived home from a family dinner at Outback's Glorietta, I, Pulsar is authorized to speak on his behalf and reveal a side of him that only few people have seen before. Joms considers the Bullfrog's tagging a great honor. Thus, despite the many pending entries that he needs to write, we will play the game.

Rules

1. This game starts with 6 weird things about you.
2. People who got tagged need to write a blog entry of their own 6 weird things.
3. They should state this rule clearly as well.
4. At the end of the list, tag 6 people.
5. Don't forget to inform each newly-tagged person by posting a comment on his own blog.

Some silly things Joms is known for, and admits being proud of doing:

1. He speaks broken English when asked to recite in class or talk in public. But when Joms is under the influence of Alcohol, even an Englishman will be amazed at how fluent he is at speaking British English. (You bloody lad! Come here and throw this bottle in the bin.)

2. He has no patience in waiting when his vehicle gets stuck in traffic. He walks no matter how far his destination is. (During the first Pyrolympics Show, he walked the entire stretch of Macapagal Avenue from Coastal Mall to SM Mall of Asia. After the fireworks display was over, he again walked from SM Mall of Asia to Taft-Libertad to ride a cab and to avoid the bumper-to-bumper traffic produced by the sudden exodus of vehicles leaving MOA grounds.)

3. He leaves the TV on and set it to auto off before going to sleep. He claims that hearing voices - especially news anchors reporting breaking news or Wall Street reports on CNN makes him sleepy. (In other news, trading at Wall Street ended much lower today after fears of another oil price increase sent investors selling their stocks on the market.)

4. He neither believes in the concept of Heaven nor Hell. However, he considers walking under trees on a cloudless sunset the closest thing to paradise. (And he is such a very strange person, he wishes to live in a place where there is only night, sunrise and sunset.)

5. When traveling, he finds thrill in having very long journeys and gets easily homesick after reaching his destination. (He also brings his own blanket when he needs to sleep at someone else's place... If he doesn't he will go namamahay.)

6. His watch is set 30 minutes ahead of the actual time. (It all started when he was assigned to the morning shift for the first time. Fearing that he would ignore the alarm and goes back to sleep, he sets the alarm clock 30 minutes in advance so that every time it rings, he will wake up thinking he will be late for work.)

I'm tagging Ewwik, Zaizai, Poi, Madame Fiona, Levantine and Mel Beckham

Go - GONG!

Multiplayer games evolve. It is something I learned from being exposed to PC games long before internet have become mainstream in the country. Back then, me and my geek friends in high school would huddle around an Intel 486 computer to kill each other with tanks as small as dots in a game called Scorched Earth. The objective of the game is pretty simple. A player will be given a tank, which he will use to shoot an opponent's tank. In between turns, crates of different ammunitions - ranging from napalm rockets to nuclear bombs fall from the sky. These crates spell the victory of a team,or a player depending on how good he is at shooting his opponents, without killing himself with the weapon he receives from above.

A PC generation later, another classic game was born. This time, instead of tanks, worms were being employed to kill the rival worms. Me and my now pa-cool barkada would still huddle around my Pentium 2 computer to blow one another with banana bombs and sheep missiles. We would laugh, jeer at one another or sometimes even roll over the floor not because someone had won against a friend's worm but because of the manner his worm got killed. (I remember my worm got blasted into pieces by a holy hand grenade that explodes shortly after the sound of a choir singing Hallelujah can be heard in the background)

Worms 2 was so addicting among my freshmen tropa, that we learned how to cut classes because of it. The game's cartoon-ish graphics combined with more than a dozen weapons to kill your friend's wiggler in a very funny way, had made this game not only a form of distraction from our hectic academic life, it also sealed our friendship for many years to come.

Now gamers get old; most of their habits change, but multiplayer games only get more sophisticated as time goes by. With the advent of MMORPGs and high-speed internet connection, the gaming environment had taken a 360 degree overhaul but the essence of the game remains the same. I'm talking about games that foster competition among teams of human players who personally know one other. These games are different from the likes of MU or Ragnarok in one important aspect: While Ragnarok lets players form guilds and teams to combat an AI enemy, the games I am talking about encourage human players to compete with one another. The addictive element of the game lies not with the power-ups and the bling-blings it contain but in the different outcomes of the game being played.

Last week, I was lucky to get in-touch with a friend who works at Mobius Games. I told him the week before of my sad fate of being left out by online gamers simply because of my dial-up connection at home. Being sympathetic to my situation, he invited me see their upcoming games and play them together with the game masters. Excited at the opportunity being presented, not only did I start recalling my gaming history, I also started playing some of my old PC games again.

One of the upcoming online games they introduced to me was a game called Gong. I tell you, Soccer fans and players would like this ballgame... and yes, you get it right, it is a Soccer game with a twist.

I am not sure if some of you have played a Soccer computer game before like the FIFA series by Electronic Arts. Don't worry, I haven't either. However, impressions tell me that EA's Soccer game is as serious and high-powered like the real game itself. With Gong, the same Soccer rules apply but the game itself is twisted in a way a human player would truly find cute rather than being complicated.

For one, your player looks like an anime character forcibly abducted from some cartoons in Animax. You can dress it up with dozens of bling-blings to choose from the game, that in the end it would look like your player will attend a costume party rather than a soccer match. There are also mini-games and magic crates that can help your player get extra advantage against other human players during a match. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to explore most of Gong's features because of time constraints. However, seeing Mister Kitsune wearing a plain-white soccer uniform with a huge mushroom bag on his back left me glued to my computer long enough to witness the Game Masters play Gong together.

For starters, the game appeared challenging because I first played it with the Masters when I was in fact, a beginner. Even at this very moment, I'm still at awe at how they were able to pull tricks such as creating a black smoke that blocks your computer screen or an appearance of a disco ball in the field which forces every player to dance for a few seconds during the match.

Gong has definitely a feel-good impression. It has addictive qualities that appeal to groups that include males and females. I could almost imagine several computers being occupied by a group of friends playing Gong. Their howls, shouts and jeers would drown the voices of those playing Dota and other online games inside the internet cafe.

Unfortunately, Gong is still in its beta testing part. Perhaps in a few months time, it will be introduced in the market with fanfare, like all online games before it.

Playing the game together with the masters had left a strange feeling that stirred an ancient part of me. I suddenly remembered the days when we used to huddle around the monitor to play the same kind of game back when we were younger.

How things go very fast these days.

Weird that no matter how games have evolved, somehow it retains an essential part that even older gamers like me can easily connect.

MMA | Boku Wa Kuma

Masarap tumambay sa gym matapos ang isang intense na work-out.

Naroon na manood ka ng ibang nagwo-work out at magspot ng cute. (Marami nun sa gym ko. Hindi lang sila buff, talagang ripped pa ang mga katawan!) Minsan naman, masarap magmasid kung sino talaga ang mga adik sa 45 lbs iron plates. Bilang isa sa mga old-timers ng Eclipse, nakaka-insecure minsan na malaman na yung nagbubuhat sa tabi mo ay higit na mas mabigat ang weight capacity sa squats kesa sa iyo. (Shit, bakit kaya niya ang 190 lbs samantalang ako ay hanggang 180 lang? Hindi kaya dahil EDT ang program ko at ang kanya naman ay 5X5 lang?) At the best sa lahat, masarap tumambay sa gym pagkatapos ng isang intense na work-out upang umamoy ng kapwa PLU na nagpapaka-straight all for the sake of maintaining the "all-barako" environment ng gym namin.

Masyado kasi nilang tinitira ang Fitness First sa mga forums (gaya ng Men's Health at Pinoyexchange) dahil sa mga nangyayari sa loob ng locker at shower room nito. Kaya naman sa amin, mariing pinagbabawal ang gumawa ng kahit anong kalokohan sa loob ng locker room. Dati pa nga ay may nakapaskil na warning na "anyone caught doing acts of immorality inside the gym premises will be subject to voiding of membership." Ganun. Therefore, kahit anong paramdam ni Ginoo sa akin nitong mga nakaraang linggo ay ignore lang ako.

Subalit dahil lagi akong ipit sa aking trabaho, ang pagtambay ay ang "the least of my priorities" sa tuwing magagawi ako sa gym.

Hanggang kanina. Natyempo kasi ang pagbubuhat ko sa araw na wala akong pasok sa trabaho.

Sa totoo lang, matagal ko nang pinag-iisipan kung makakabuti ba sa akin ang mag-enroll sa kanilang Mixed Martial Arts program.

Naalala ko kasi yung kaguluhang naganap dito sa aming lugar ilang linggo na ang nakakaraan. Sakaling nagkainitan kami ng war-freak kong kapitbahay, di malayong magpakita ako sa inuman ng mga tropa na may black-eye sa mata.

Isa pa, nanghihinayang rin ako kasi sa

laki at lapad kong ito,

hanggang sindak lang ang kaya kong gawin sa ibang tao. Hindi ko pa kasi natetest kung yung pagbabatak ko ba sa gym ay may epekto rin sa tigas ng aking kamao.

Kaya naman kanina, sa unang pagkakataon na tumambay ako sa gym ay sa fighting room ako unang pumunta. Naroon rin kasi si Blakedaddy (Head Coach ng Eclipse na sikat sa Pinoyexchange) kaya naman ayos lang akong manood ng mga sparring na nagaganap kanina.

Sa kasamaang palad ay wala akong nakitang aksyon. Merong dalawa na nagwre-wrestling sa dulo, samantalang ang iba naman ay nagwa-warm up pa lang sa harap ng salamin. Nakakaboring nga kung tutuusin eh. Mabuti na lamang at ang dahilan ko talaga kanina sa aking pagtambay ay abangan ang pagsulpot ng aming poster boy sa G4M. Sa tinagal-tagal ko kasing nakisama sa kanya upang mag-recruit ng mga bagong members para sa gym namin ay hindi man lang ito nakipagkilala sa akin.

Makaraan ang ilang minuto ay umalis na rin ako sa fighting room para magtungo sa locker at maligo. Gaya ng mga naudlot kong balak noong nakaraan, ang planong mag-enroll sa MMA ay hanggang pangarap na lang muna.

Astig sana ang matangkad ka na, malaki na ang katawan mo

at kaya mo pang mangbalibag ng isang straight na lalaki na babastos sa iyo.

Ang tikas sana na kahit alam mong may taglay kang binabae sa iyong personality ay untouchable ka pa rin ng mga maton na haharang sa iyo.

Maybe in the far future, sakaling may makakumbinsi sa aking maging MMA fighter gaya noong mga napanood ko kanina: Dumating man ang panahon na kaya ko ng mag-angas na siguradong kaya kong panindigan ang lahat ng gagawin ko: Maging sanggano man ako ng Orosa-Nakpil for all I care,

Subalit sa oras na makapanood ako ng video katulad nito.



Asahan mo na kahit napapalibutan na ako ng mga kaaway sa paligid, mamumutawi pa rin sa aking bibig ang mga katagang ito.

"Ang Kyuuuuuuuuttt naman nung teddy bear!!"

Bahala na kung umuwi pa rin akong tadtad ng pasa sa katawan at may limang bukol sa ulo.

Vamos De Madrid

---

Frankly, I don't know what to make out of this YouTube video clip I found from Siege's Livejournal.

Is it a racial slur? I can't say exactly.

Is it like telling us straight to our faces that Madrid has a Metro and since we provincials were awestruck by it, we should construct a Metro of our own? A weak argument. We have an LRT Purple Line to brag about.

Besides, why should we cram ourselves in their tiny coaches when ours are twice bigger than theirs?

Despite the subtle mockery this ad appears to convey, I honestly find it very amusing. Not only do I find the barrio scene very refreshing, (because I haven't seen one in ages!) the attempts of the Spanish to portray Filipinos as unsophisticated rural folks is quite humbling.

Others will find this very offensive. But since I know myself more than the creators of the advertisement do, then I consider this ad something that would momentarily suspend my disbelief.

Watch it, laugh about it, then move on. Go back to the real life.

Shuffle, Schmuffle (Mugenmix Edit) | Hibernation

From Makmak

Instructions

• Load up all your music. [ I opted to use all tracks on my iPod.]
• Put it on shuffle/random.
• For each question, answer with the next track that plays.

---

01. How does the world see me?

"I'm open, you're closed
Where I follow, you'll go
I worry I won't see your face
Light up again"

- Howie Day, Collide






02. Will I have a happy life?

"I asked if she wanted 2 dance
And she said all she wanted was a good man
And wanted 2 know
If I thought I was qualified, yeah"

- Jordan Knight, I Could Never





03. What do my friends really think of me?

"Ring, ring, ring goes the telephone
The lights are on but there's no-one home
Tick tick tock it's a quarter to two
And I'm done I'm hangin' up on you"

- Madonna, Hung Up, (Instrumental Remix)







04. Do people secretly lust after me?


"Smoother than the L.A. weather
That's how he holds himself together
He is colder than the winter
I wrap my coat around to better
Counteract his charm attack
That leaves me hungry
Well, I'm no savior
But I tried to save you
With all my love that rages high inside."

- Leona Naess, Charm Attack



05. How can I make myself happy?

" Poso se thelo
Poso mou leipies
Girise se piso
Giati sou leo"

I can be,
(Your genie maybe)
Come to me,
(and touch me baby)
I can be,
(your wonder lady )
Say sesame

- Despina Vandi, Gia ( DJ Gregory Mix)



06. What should I do with my life?

"Sun is shining,
the weather is sweet
make you want to move
your dancing feet to the rescue,
here i am want you to know,
y'all, where i stand."

- Bob Marley, Sun Is Shining





07. Will I ever have children?

"Now the rain comes down the windows and it
Drops onto the forehead of the waiting boy
He surveys his rental kingdom and he
Wonders if he's really lost his one joy"

- Semisonic, Gone To The Movies



08. What is some good advice for me?

"Ok I'm gonna change the style
Ya' all Like I'm wearin' the right style
I'm gonna doin' one in off the rap
You wanna make my poetry right"

- Benny Benassi, Change Style




09. How will I be remembered?

"Pangarap ko'y
Makita kang
Naglalaro sa buwan
Inalay mo
Sa aking ang
Gabing walang hangganan
(Hindi mahanap/'Di mahagilap)
Sa lupa ang pag-asa
Nakikiusap (na lang/ sa buwan)"

- Rivermaya, Himala




10. What is my signature dance song?

"I'm moving,
I'm coming
Can you hear what I hear?
It's calling you my dear
Out of reach (Take me to my beach)
I can hear it calling you
I'm coming, not drowning
Swimming closer to you."

- All Saints, Pure Shores




11. What do I think my current theme song is?

"Mornin', just another day
Happy people pass my way
Lookin' in their eyes I see a memory
I never realized
How happy you made me, oh Mandy"

- Barry Manilow, Mandy




12. What song will play at my funeral?

"Cause you and I both loved
What you and I spoke of
And others just dream of
And if you could see me now
Well I'm almost finally out of
I'm finally out of
Finally deedeedeedee
Well I'm almost finally, finally
Well I'm free, oh, I'm free"

- Jason Mraz, You and I



13. What type of people do I like to date?

"Why didn't I say
The things I needed to say
How could I let my angel get away
Now my world is just a tumblin' down
I can say it so clearly
But you're nowhere around"

- Tony Rich Project, Nobody Knows





14. What is my day going to be like?

"love me when nobody else can see
touch my soul you treat me like a stranger
this is not the way i like to feel
should have known your love this strong
would bring some danger"

- Morley, Slingshots

---

* Tatlong oras ko rin ito pinaghirapan. I had fun. Thanks!!

* Since I borrowed this meme, I won't tag anyone. Kayo na bahala kung paano kayo magshushuffle sa Windows Media Player/Itunes/mp3 player niyo.

*Strongly recommended para sa mga taong gusto pumatay ng oras.

Anti-Climax

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LifeOut

"Parang napaka liberatory at emancipating ang tono ng mga entries mo sa yong blog lalu na nag panghapon sched mo sa work to pursue ur hedonistic pursuits. Heheheeh."

--

"Feeling ko nga, nang mag-change sched mo nag-iba na orbit mo. Naging vampiric ka rin. Dati, napaka-zen like ng tono ng blog mo. Ngayon hedonist ka na."

- Joe Neruda

---

Kung si Deathnote ay napapadalas sa kanyang SOP, (Sex On Phone) ako naman ay biglang nagbago ang landas at dumistansya muna sa G4M upang imbestigahan itong website na matagal-tagal ko na ring naririnig mula sa mga taong nakakasalamuha ko.

Kilala bilang LifeOut.com, sa unang tingin ay wala siyang pinagkaiba sa Xtube na nadiskubre ko lamang noong isang taon. Ang alam ko lang, marami ang naaliw sa Lifeout. Ilang kalalakihan na rin ang nagsabi na mas maganda daw ito sa Xtube, na talaga namang umubos ng lakas ko noong una't huling bisita ko dito. Paano kasi sa Lifeout, hindi lang amateur M2M videos ang mapapanood mo, napakarami ring image galleries ang nagkalat dito.

Dumating ako sa bahay na mas maaga pa sa alas-onse ng gabi. Kadalasan, buraot ako tuwing dumarating ako ng ganito kaaga galing sa trabaho. Feeling ko kasi, I've been missing out on life and I have to compensate for it by going out after my shift. Kaso mo, tinatamad talaga akong lumabas at wala rin akong gana sumabak sa anumang gimik. Sa huli, tinanggap ko na lang na sadyang heto ang tinadhana sa akin sa araw na ito.

Mabilis akong nag-online upang basahin ang mga blogs na araw-araw at gabi-gabi ko na binabasa. Isa na dito ang kay Deathnote, na marami ring obserbasyon sa buhay gaya ko. Napansin ko ang salitang Lifeout sa kanyang entry nitong mga nakaraan. Dala na rin ng nararamdaman kong libog sa katawan, nagdecide akong silipin ang website kahit na dial-up lang ang gamit kong internet access sa bahay. Sa madaling salita, nag sign-up ako't nagulat sa aking nakita.

Sa image galleries pa lang nag pre-cum na ako. Naroon ang choices of image folders mula bareback, anal cumshot, at iba iba pang fetishes na lagi kong iniisip sa tuwing ako ay nagco-coljax. Nagkataon naman na may pagka-pederastic ang trip ko ngayong gabi, kaya naman unang binulatlat ko yung folder kung saan "dad-son adventures" daw ang makikita.

Masasabi ko lang, OMFG sa aking mga pinagnasaan...

In real life, hindi ko kakayanin ang mga ganong eksena. Sa totoo, meron pa akong ilang mga twisted na fetishes na hindi ko na sasabihin dito. Sabi nga nila, a Sagittarian is a very creative sex mate, and I'm proud to be born under the birth sign Sagittarius. Read between the lines na lang and you would find out what I mean. Ang mga ganitong website, gaano man ka R-18, ang siyang pumipigil sa akin upang hagilapin ang the "real thing." As long as someone else gets to live out my extreme fantasies, masaya na ako sa aking perverted na mundo.

It takes guts to confess these things, and much as it would further damage my credibility (kung meron pang natitira), tao lang ako para hindi pagtuunan ng pansin ang xtube, lifeout at pati na rin yung blog ni bert baltazar at kwentongkalibugan.net. Kung may dsl connection lang ako, I could have enjoyed more from the internet.

Lalaki ako para hindi tigasan.

And what better way to address a massive, angry boner than to whack it off in ecstatic, blissful silence, while clicking links that would lead me into the highest orgasmic paradise.

Alterno-Boy Forever

Being true to my alternative music roots, here's one of my favorite MTV of all time.

Meeting Kitsune

Seven + ABCD (Last Part)

Let's sing our Alphabet song:

A - Age: I'm turning twenty six... twenty four days from now.

B - Bands I'm Listening To Right Now: indie-alternative ulit akow - Peel, One Republic, Marty Casey and the Lovehammers, Josh Rouse

C - Career: Call Center Agent, Creative Writing Graduate Student

D - Drink or Smoke: Marlboro Green/Lights and San Miguel Light baby.

E - Easiest Friends To Talk To: Sensible, Artistic and Koboy. I might be choosy when it comes to friends, but I don't really mind hanging out with out and effeminates. Badtrip ako sa KSP.

F - First Crush: Is with a girl. Her name is Cristina.

G - Gadgets: Creative Zen Nano Plus Mp3 Player, Nokia N70, Sony Cybershot 3.3 MP, Pentium Core Duo Desktop PC

H - Hobbies: As of now - Writing and Playing Computer Games.

I - In love: Yes, with my family and my buddy.

J- Junk Food You Like: Anything that is Potato Chips.

K - Kids: Wish I have a boy.

L - Longest Ride Ever: Manila to Isabela. Umalis kami ng bahay ng around midnight, dumating kami ng Santiago City at past lunchtime.

M - My Perfect Nightout: Inuman sa pad with very close friends, playing alternative music on the radio, yosi sa table, sentihan magdamag. Or Non-stop clubbing all night.

N - Names For Your Future Kids: If for some divine intervention I got a lady pregnant, I'd name our kid(s) Joem Endymionne or John Paul Alexis. Yung girl na bahala if we have a daughter.

O - One Wish You Have Now: A life without regrets.

P - Phobias: Frogs

Q - Favorite Quote: “It's better to run away for cover to see the big picture rather than facing a trouble head-on without thinking of ways to resolve it efficiently or at least have a back up plan when another retreat is needed.” - Akin to.

R - Reasons To Smile: Acts of Random Kindness, Feeling of being blessed in life.

S - Sleeping Time: Between 1-2 am at home and 8 or 9 am during power naps at work.

T - TV Channels: National Geographic, Jack TV, Animax, Discovery Channel

U - Unknown Fact About You: My life is an open book, but I don't talk too much in person. I don't usually look at the eye of the person when having conversations.

V - Vegetable You Hate: Ampalaya

W - Worst Habit: Nailbiting

X - X-rays You’ve Had: Chest and Back X-Ray

Y - Yummy Foods: Menudo, Pasta, Ground Beef Omelet (Tortang Giniling), Lumpiang Shanghai, Chaplets Ala-King.

Z - Zodiac Sign: Sagittarius

---

I'm tagging Dean, Ika, Eon, Mink, Centurion, Hugh and Ardee

Seven + ABCD (First Part)

Day Off.

Dahil nag-aaverage lang ako ng limang oras na tulog sa loob ng limang araw, sinagad ko ang sleeping time ko kanina't bumangon ako ng past 12 ng tanghali. Binaha ako ng forwarded na text messages buong umaga na alam ko namang hindi talaga para sa akin - ito'y para sa maramihan at sa totoo'y hindi ko lubhang na-aappreciate. Tinamad akong lumabas, kaya't naglaro ako ng Sims 2 buong maghapon. Yep, Sims 2 all day. Non-stop yun pre. Natapos ang araw, nanood ako ng TV Patrol upang mabalitaan ang super bagyo na maaring mag-direct hit sa Manila next week. Nagkaayos rin kami ng utol ko, matapos niya akong iwanan sa ere sa Quiapo noong isang araw. Ako ay nakatambay ngayon sa G4M habang gumagawa ng Meme. Mamaya, darating si Phanks upang makigamit muli ng computer.

Gagamitin ko ng excuse ito para magkaayos kami matapos ang panandaliang fall-out na naganap noong nakaraang linggo.

Heto ang aking buhay ngayong araw.

Upang ma-fulfill ang aking pangako sa mga nag-tag sa akin. Nandito ang aking Meme. This time, walang halong sexual, or kabadingan ang mga magiging sagot ko.

---

Special thanks for Shamasu and Carl for tagging me.

Seven Truths/Things about me.

1. I believe that I have virtual god complex. If not running a simulated life ( like in the Sims) I am building an empire (like in the game Civilization). In my younger years, I have ruled - through computer a galactic empire (Master of Orion, Galactic Civilizations, Pax Imperia, ), a business conglomerate (Transport Tycoon, Theme Hospital etc). However, I am a sore loser when it comes to leading an army. Therefore, I really don't enjoy playing war games such as Warcraft, Command and Conquer and Starcraft.

2. I belong to the generation of Anime and Super Sentai lovers who have seen Yaiba, Dragonball Z, Ghost Fighter, Sailor Moon, Vision of Escaflowne, Patlabor, Magic Knight Rayearth etc. Kapanahunan ko rin si Bioman, Shaider, Maskman, Fiveman, Magmaman, Mask Rider Black at Ultraman.

Kaya dun sa mga Naruto at Deathnote fans, talagang sobrang lost ako. Ibang generation na sila. Hehe.

3. I'm not a text person. I don't respond to forwarded text messages and it brings me great annoyance if a person sends me five forwarded text messages every fucking day. If the person who texted and I are not close, I wouldn't give a damn whatever happens in their lives - especially if it's just trivial matters. I don't want people asking me what I'm doing because I'm always busy and preoccupied. Texting is for urgent communication, one forwarded message occasionally is enough. It gives meaning to the word longing.

4. Sumasabit ako sa jeep, lalo na kapag nagmamadali. I have no concept of traffic since I don't mind walking long distance just to reach my destination.

5. My work-week starts when everyone's work-week ends. And it really sucks.

6. I'm a mama's boy and I'm very proud of it.

7. I'm not a mall person. The only time I go to the mall is when I have to buy my toiletries or meet someone for a friendly talk. I usually hate crowded places and the only time I break such rule is during my annual Christmas shopping rush in Divisoria.

Bad Boy

While hanging out in G4M this evening:

---

10 Nov 2007, 19:09
juicytyt_ass: fuck mo ako..asan k?

10 Nov 2007, 19:17
You: nasa earth pare.

10 Nov 2007, 19:24
juicytyt_ass: ayos din sagot mo ano...intayin mo ang hagupit ng kidlat n tatama sau kung nasan k man sa earth..gud look...expect the cursed u been waiting for!

10 Nov 2007, 19:27
You: Magbasa ka ng profile. Kala mo lahat ng tao dito eh palakantot eh.

---

It really pisses me off when some guy would send me a private message only to leave such blunt and sleazy invitation like what is written above. I understand that G4M is a cruise site. There is no doubt about that. But to go down to such level as what he did in order to get my attention, simply turned me off.

I don't go for guys who doesn't have any respect or pride for themselves.

What's really sad is that he ain't good-looking either to make such overconfident invitations. Confident guys would prefer to do it discreetly and indirectly. To give you an idea about what he looked like; he is chubby and pale-looking. Don't get me wrong though, sexual standards is different from friendship. I have friends who are chubby, and even effeminate - and they don't have any complains on how I treat them and our friendship. My point is, desperate guys who swallow whatever pride that remains in them just to get a guy in bed severely disappoints me.

Pathetic isn't it?

My reply was very sarcastic. It was even harsh to some extent because I could have said it in a nicer way, or even ignored his message compeletely. But without bitchy guys like me, no one would rudely awaken them to the reality that guys sought their equal. He should learn from the hipons in G4M, who never dared to show their head pics. If they know that they are no match for masculine and slim-toned guys, then there is a proper and sensible way to reach out and establish friendly contacts with these guys.

He should learn that not all members of G4m are promiscuous enough to fuck anyone who sends them sexual favors. Guys like him should learn to read profiles.

Karma might get back at me for sure. But at least, I gave someone a valuable lesson in handling their PLU to PLU affairs. For if he continues to send improper and sleazy invitations like what I received to guys in the website;

He would continue to attract sarcastic, or even harsh replies from guys who does not find him their kind of trip.

Ang Sampung Perversions Ni Joms

"kung wala edi about you.. kinkiness mo or naughtiness haha..lahat ng mga di namin cguro aakalaing gagwin mo! haha"

- A reply to my comment, reigningmrs.blogspot.com

Hala napasubo yata ako. Pero what the heck. Kahit pasira image, sige na nga.

WARNING: For mature readers only. Katuwaan lang.

---


1. "Astig, totoo palang madulas siya!" - 20 years old ako nang ma-devirginize. Sa kasamaang palad, ito ay sa prostitute sa Bocaue. Siraulo kasi yung tropa ko eh. Hinamon yung isa naming kaibigan na pinaghihinalaan nilang bading noong college. Lahat tuloy kaming mga virgin sa barkada ay napasabak sa gera.

Heto ang reaction ko noong finifinger ko yung tsiks.

After ko ma-devirginize (na maraming kahiya-hiyang bagay ang naganap), narealize ko na hindi ko pala trip ang babae. A month matapos noon, nakikipag-torrid na ako sa lalaki.

2. "Lasang maalat na matamis-tamis." - Bago ako natuto mag-swallow ng sa iba, yung sa akin muna ang pinag-aralan ko tikman.

3. "Tol kwentuhan mo naman ako ng kabastusan..." - Noong kami'y nasa college pa ni pareng ace, umuupo kami sa pinaka-dulong silya kapag buraot kami sa class discussion. Habang nagpapaliwanag ang professor sa harap ng klase, kinukuwento naman niya yung mga pantasya niya sa classmates naming tsiks - na nasa harap at masigasig na nakikinig sa sinasabi ng prof.

4. "Iputok mo... sa mukha." - Turn on ako kapag sa mukha nag-cum yung partner ko. No further explanations needed.

5. Two tops One Bot. - Simula noon, pantasya ko na makipag-threesome sa dalawang top. Mas barako kesa sa akin, mas okey. Maraming near misses, pero hindi ko nakita yung tell-tale signs. Minsan naman ako ang umaatras dahil wala sa mood o kaya wrong timing. Hindi ko alam kung mabuting bagay na hindi pa nangyayari ito,

takot rin kasi akong ma-double...

6. Nagiging Top ako kapag:

1. Mas matagal ang duration na ako ang blinow-job.
2. Mas bata sa akin, lean at moreno.
3. Willing na bottom. Dapat mas masculine sa akin.

So far, dalawa pa lang ang nabobottom ko.

Parehong nagreklamong masakit.

7. Romansa Militar - Yoko sa lahat eh yung malamyang sex partner. Kung pwedeng my blindfolding, cussing, dirty talk mas ayos. Ang mahalaga eh rough siya kasi sa ganoong paraan lang ako nagiging palaban. Gusto ko naririnig sa partner ko kung gaano kasarap yung sex namin.

Turn on ako sa torrid kissing.

At mas turn on ako kapag role-playing... at ako ang nirerape.

8. Secret Talent - Kaya kong magpa-cum ng bottom ng hindi siya nagja-jack off. Hindi ko alam paano nangyayari yun.

9. Blackbook.Doc - Well-accounted lahat ng mga naka-sex ko. May listahan ako na tinatago at included dito ang ilang mga notes tungkol sa taong iyon.

10. Friendship? What Friendship? - Karelasyon oo. Pero wala pa akong nagiging kaibigan na naka-sex ko. Kumbaga, parang hit-and-run ang nangyayari lagi.

Xtube

I discovered the website through G4M. It has been thoroughly discussed in the forums and was even hailed as technology's greatest gift to perverts like me.

Last week, a gay colleague who secretly do video streaming at work told me the perversions of this website. He even encouraged me to access it when I'm bored and not doing anything at all.

I told him that I only have dial-up access at home. A simple video streaming would take 48 years to finish. On the other hand, watching it in the office will not only pose a threat to my already damaged employee file. It would only leave me repressed and frustrated from not enjoying physically what the video stream is providing.

However, opportunity came when I least expected it.

And now that I have temporary access to the website, daig ko pa ang nag bath-house sa dami ko nang...

Plok...

You know, it really adds up to production inefficiency ha.

And it makes you weak; It disables your sane way of thinking.

Perhaps I should find a Balot Vendor before I sleep tonight... that is, if there is one in the outskirts of [insert name of secret location here].

I might break a record of doing it, more than five times in one night.