Kanye tweets to the New Yorker

There's a whole list of these here. Awesome!

Fast Food Nation, why do you get so much press?

Confession: I never much cared for the book Fast Food Nation. It framed everything as such a shock, and I wasn't that shocked. The Jungle it wasn't. Hell, it wasn't even The Omnivore's Dilemma, which I thought was more insightful.

Anyway. Apparently we're revisiting in. Boo, just lay down and die already, FFN.

Glenn Beck novel trailer!

Oh oh oh oh oh this is so exciting. By which I mean, what the fuck is going on in that video??

Fingerprinting for library books

Because library cards are so old hat, the school system in Machester wants to use fingerprints to check out library books. What, the retinal scans were too expensive?

This is quite clearly appalling,” said Phil Booth, national coordinator of NO2ID, a privacy campaign group.

“For such a trivial issue as taking out of library books the taking of fingerprints is way over the top and wrong.

“It conditions children to hand over sensitive personal information.”

I think the real point is to crack down on library theft more effectively. You don't return your book? Your fingerprints are already in the system! So when you, 13 year old Joey, get pulled over for speeding and arrested for assaulting an officer, they'll match your fingerprints to your stolen library book and fine the crap out of you. Libraries saved!

Blowing up enemies with book learnin'

Ever wondered what a tank covered in books looks like? Wonder no more! Take that, ignorance! Take that, illiteracy!

Sidebar: I would have embedded the video, but it is unembeddable. Why would anyone do that? You're not driving more traffic by making it harder to access, sirs. You're just pissing me off. Argh.

Steig Larsson's estate is fucked up

Terribly, terribly fucked up.

Oh god, Muppet mashups

This is an amazing list of Muppet mashups. My favorite is below:

Feminist toys for girls and boys

Check out the Bronte sisters action figures, and the Brontesaurus:

Do want. And thanks to Michael, for sending this along!

Ground black pepper is decidedly not "ground black people"

A misprint in an Australian cookbook (in which "people" was substituted for "pepper" of the "ground black" variety) cost $20k to fix. Now, this super sucks, and is one of the worse possible typos. The publisher's response?

"When it comes to the proofreader, of course they should have picked it up, but proofreading a cook-book is an extremely difficult task. I find that quite forgivable."

Of course it's forgivable! It's not like you pay proofreaders to keep you from having to recall for misprints.

George Washington: Thieving scalawag

George Washington forgot to return 2 library books in 1789, and now owes $300,000 in library dues. Shame on you, father of our nation. Returning library books is a civic duty, sir.

Dothraki is real, squees from my face

So, ok, deep breaths: HBO created a grammar for the language Dothraki from A Game of Thrones. No I'm not that excited whatever shut up.

Classics be damned, one star!

Over at Salon, Jeanette Demain writes about the rash of one star reviews for classics on Amazon. Just because something is called a classic doesn't mean it's any good, sirs. My favorite review she cites is about Charlotte's Web:

I really didn't care that Wilbur won first prize. And how in the world does a pig and a spider become friends? It's beyond me....Even as a child I found the plot very far-fetched. It is because of this horrid book that I eat sausage every morning and tell my dad to kill every spider I see.

And my day has been made. Go to the link to check out all of the poorly spelled and completely ungrammatical rants. You will not be sorry.

Villainous, authors

Some authors are bad, reader types. Not only in the "talent" sense, but also, often, in the cinematic "what a bad ass or a crazy" way. And, oh look, a gallery of the best of these bad authors!

How convenient.

Sisters, sisters, there were never such devoted sisters

Never had to have a chaperone, no sir, I'm there to keep my eye on her.

Sisters are important, reader types, because, as the song says, they care, share, stick together--all sorts of things. Celebrate sisters with this list of the best books about sisters, which I think is pretty good (except it includes I Capture the Castle, which I haaaaated last time I read it).

And, to leave you with the immortal words of sisterly love: Lord help the mister, who comes between me and my sister, and Lord help the sister who comes between me and my man.

Shel Silverstein writes from beyond the grave

Shel Silverstein, beloved poet, will be publishing a second posthumous collection for children. I would be more excited, but I recently saw a staging of "Shel's Shorts," which was, perhaps, the dirtiest collection of short plays I have ever seen. Shel, your childlike wonder is now tainted by hilarious dirtiness.

Don't believe me? The first one stars a guy who dreams about effing his daughter. I saw this sitting between my parents. Emotionally scarred!

Childhood heroes

The Guardian has a great slideshow of the top ten heroes from children's books, including Pippi Longstocking, Anne of Green Gables, Matilda, and Sara Crewe of A Little Princess. There are also some boys on the list, but, you know. Eh.

Bunnies are where it's at

Aww!

Yes, it's a Friday. What tipped you off?

Danielle Steel, please be my friend

Having recently discussed Danielle Steel, I don't think I properly expressed how great I think she is. To quote:

"I'm very organized," Steel says of her regimented schedule. "You can't have nine children and not be organized. Otherwise it just looks like Appalachia."

Oh my, Danielle. You are a feisty lady. Please come hang out.

Dead pigs + the ocean = science

Why is science so gross and so cool all at the same time?

Funfetti for the whole family

Three words for you: funfetti cookie sandwiches. Oh. Em. Gee.

You can eat these while you lounge in your room covered in stacked paperback wallpaper in your enchantment under the sea apartment.