I know this sounds a little sick... but i think i like taking the flu medicine... the one that causes drowsiness... i need the sleep badly man... anyway, i finally had my first uninterrupted sleep since the past few days... although i don't feel too comfortable, i still sleep till the next morning... damn... i hope this repeats for the rest of my life.. or at least the next few days so that i can get some rest...


Yesterday evening i went over to my 2nd aunt's place for a family gathering... cause my cousin will be leave for his further studies in germany next year... had a very challenging time... i was so damn tired and i can't sleep, my throat was and is still swollen and i had to eat all the fried stuff... must self-control a little... haha... and today my grandma fried pork... damn... this one cannot control... cause it's damn damn nice... i just try to eat lesser... anyway, i think my appitite is coming back... i'm getting hungry more easily now... unlike the past few days... haha... something to be glad of...


Ok man... tomorrow will be the New Year count down at Sam's place... erm.. that sounds like my place!! haha... and i'm not too prepared yet... but i guess everything should be fine... i know it will... haha...

Haiz... finally it's all over... both concerts had ended... it was great yesterday... the performance was perfect and i really enjoyed myself the whole time... except the part where i feel a little unwell... the day before the concert my throat swelled... damn... i got so scared i avoided everything and went on a healthy diet... haha... and guess what, i'm pretty sick today... arn't i lucky? haha... my throat swelled, my nose was blocked, i sneeze damn lot and i cough a little... but i have a long life... so i won't die so easily... but i feel like crap... anyway, thanks everyone for the wonderful experience.. and support.. be it coming to the concert physically or giving me mental support at home...

I feel a little sense of regrets or something... after practising so much on the pieces, now all my hard work had come to an end yesterday... what i've learnt while practising the piece might applicable in the future, but the running notes and stuff will no longer be in use... donno how to explain lah...


I think i have a big problem... INSOMIA!!! i had been having a real hard time falling asleep... it all started about 3 days ago... i thought it was just some concert stress thing... but no, i was damn wrong... even last night i still faced difficulties sleeping... in the whole night, i got up like 4 times... it's like an hourly thing... i feel like crap man... the only time where i seriously fall asleep was when the sun had raised... that that was like only 3 hour of good sleep... but i still wake up occasionally... i think i've been posioned... sometimes i just wish i have sleeping pills... so that i can fall into a deep sleep on the days where i had difficulty sleeping...

Haiz... CNY preparation had started... firstly, i gotta build up my body... time to chiong man... went for gym on monday alone... and went again today... alone again... gotta build up man... but gyming alone is pretty dangerous... i do take cautions though... i only go slightly beyond my limits... cannot do too much or the weights will fall on me and kill me... haha... next will be shopping... i plan to get myself one of those traditional clothing... if possible, a sleeveless one... haha... i know it's going to be hard... but i'll try... i want to do something different next year... cause this year, my dad, bro and i wore formal... well, my guess is this is going to be the standard dress code till i get so old i could not change my clothes... i want to be different next year... haha... don't be so dead on style... be different... haha...


What a tiring day... i'll never gym before band in the future... i was pretty tired the whole time... especially when we are playing pieces that can seriously drain you... i was struggling to keep my eyes open in the bus on the way back home... and i saw a lot of cockroaches beside me... damn sick... that's where my additional 2 cents go to... before the price increase, i don't remember seeing any cockroaches in the buses... after the price increase, all this shit starts to come out... haiz... anyway, i'm sorry if my stench disturbed anyone... especially those who were around me... i'm sorry if you did not dare to take a deep breath before playing your instrument because of my stench... well, at least now you'll know how to get to me with a dog... haha...


At Bishan MRT, i was stopped by one of those MRT staff for a bag check... dammit... do i look like a terrorist? or is there something special about me carrying a backpack? or am i carrying too many things and made myself look like terrorist? just a backpack and my clarinet... do i really look that dangerous with that? what can i do with a clarinet? slash people with my reed? stab people with my clarinet? or use the screw and throw them like darts? dammit... i'm just a harmless, innocent little boy... maybe not completely innocent... but i don't have any harmful intentions... anyway, i thought the old man was going to do a full check on me... those where they ask me to strip naked in public and make sure i have nothing on me... all the old man did was, "Can you open your bag?" so i did what he told me to do... "Here is my laptop." i told him as i open the first compartment... immediately after, "Thank you very much. Sorry for the inconvenience. Have a nice day." i was stunned man... i haven't take me clothes off for him to check... i mean i haven't show him the other compartments... and i'm good to go? this can't be it... it's either the man needs to meet a certain quota of bag checks or the security is not strict enough... haiyo... so troublesome... but the train would be coming in another 6mins... so this helped me waste my time... haha...


My mp3 hates me... the battery only last for hours... in the past, i can last for days... now, it can only last for about 6 hours or so... haiz... make me so lonely whenever i go home... haiz... i know W15H is fond of buying people electronics for their birthdays... well, if you plan to get me any electronics, a mp3 battery will be good enough... haha... anyway, i'm not expecting any electronics... i have no use for them... unless they are one of those little electronics that can cost a bomb... haha... but that won't happen...

Haiz.. i went through so much just to get 1 string... i spend more than $10 just to get 1 string... isn't that ridicules? spent more than $2 travelling... i'm really lucky that the bus timing had worked with my movements today... bus from home to Esplanade via 857... my brother say that 857 don't come very often and he had waited for an hour for the bus before... he kept on repeating that to me since last night when i made plans to get my string... i had 2 things to tell him... but i only told him one... dumb and unlucky... i only told him the unlucky part... i don't want to hurt his feelings... too bad for him that he waited for 1 hour... i'm not so unlucky... i waited for a short while and the bus had arrived... there goes $1+... i alighted at Esplande instead one closer to the shop cause i was sick of sitting... it was a damn long ride... i was getting hungry from sitting in the bus... i didn't know that sitting can be so energy consuming too... haha... anyway, i had a short walk to Peninsula Shopping Mall... and guess what.. they don't sell 1 string... so i had to buy a new pack of strings... all 6 of them... just for 1 string, i had to pay $8+... haiz... now i have 5 extra strigs... what am i going to do with them? the other 5 strings are not prone to breaking... at least based on my experience, i've never seen the 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th and 6th string break before... haiz... anyway, while i was walking towards the bus stop, 857 came... haha... arn't i good or what? but there goes another $1+... so there goes $10+... haiz...


I FINALLY GOT MY PAY RISE!!! WHHOOO!!! after all the sweat and blood from trying to convince my parents, i got a $30 pay rise!!! haha... it's not a large sum, but i'm satisfied with it... $30 is the inflation from the past 3 years... i stood and watch my dad calculate the sum... haha... this had made a difference between my siblings and me... i dare to do things... the rest are all cowards... all talk no action... if it's not for me then there won't be many things they have now... losers...

Yesterday's practise was madness... shit i should not use the word "madness"... it's so girl... anyway, practise was pretty insane... it was worst than running a marathon... i tell you, my chest have this boiling water feeling... i don't really know how to explain what i felt... but it was terrible... i was so exhausted and tired.. and hungry... after samson and dilailah, i was as good as dead... i think my lips can cremate already... my lips are dead... 2 days of crazy practise... i think in no time there will be flowers growing on my lips already... crap man... friday is coming soon... people, please buy my tickets... if not there are always tickets at the door waiting for you to buy... please come...


Haiz... one hell of a shopping today... early in the afternoon go bishan for gym... later meet up with sister for christmas shopping... from J8 to Plaza Singapura to Peninsula Shopping Mall to Esplanade... damn damn tiring... i'm drained man... haiz... i've finally done my shopping for christmas... just one present for the gift exchange... but this present is going to be a burden for the rest of the days till 31 december... all the additional expenses are necessary to keep it alive... i can only wrap it minutes before the gift exchange... if not later it suffocate and die... haiz... the next few days are not going to be peaceful for me... haiz...

Walking a Plaza Sing was terrible... seems like everyone is doing their last minute shopping... but it can't be that everyone is shopping for FOOD!!! why is all the fast food restaurant full of people? even at 3.30pm... can't a hungry boy and not so hungry girl get some food? so what if they are going to buy food for their friends? the can always order take-aways... why must they hog the seats and do their stuff? damn... my sister have to bear with my non-stop complains as we go for a food hunt around the place... but i'm really sorry.. cause even after getting my food, i was still complaining about getting a present... that was unintentional... and my sister is just ill fated to have a brother that complains a lot... haha...


Fuck man... my last string just broke... where in the blue hell am i going to find another string of such quality? don't tell me i need to buy a whole new pack... that would be another $8 for just one string... and what am i going to do with the other strings? fuck man... why am i so careless? and this set of string is only sold in Peninsula Shoping Mall... fuck man... that means i'm going to have to travel all the way there just to buy 6 strings when i just need one... haiz...


Life is starting to get boring... i always have no plans... no life.. no future... i have very little thing to look forward to... all i have left to do is to practise on both guitar and clarinet and back to my PSP or laptop... haiz... i seriously hate holidays... i feel so lonely all the time... haiz... too bad everyone is busy with their stuff... hope everyone enjoy their holidays... don't be like me... a loser...


I hate christmas... it suck... it's a time where you spend money on others... and that sucks... and i even had to buy a gift for myself... $120... and now another gift for the gift exchange... and it's excluding the transport fare... all the travelling is so expensive... no concession and everything... dammit... who in the blue hell is the one who started everything? kill that fat man in red... nobody will know if he's bleeding or not cause he's in red the whole time... he abuses his little raindeer... he make them pull his fat ass all over the world... he's fat and has no heart problems... he makes short people slaves... and he make judgement on kids... who could come up with such an evil person named Santa... move the "n" to the back of his name and what do you get? i don't have to spell it... damn... Santa is a bad influence... and i bet he's around cheating on every man's wife... that's why someone wrote a song "I saw mummy kissing Santa Claus"... Santa is a mother thief... what an evil man... and don't Santa die of any heart diseases? he is so fat... i bet there are lots of shit stuck in his blood vessels... and don't his blood pressure rise when he's flying on his magical sledge? don't he get any heart attack or something when he's flying about? somebody please shot him down... he makes christmas disgusting... he makes my wallet sick...

Damn damn damn tired today... woke up early to go my grandma's place for some prayer thing... i was representing my family there... my dad is overseas this time round... so they need someone else from the family... so sadly, me and my bro have to go... my mum is busy with her side of the family... it seems that this is some praying festival where all the chinese have to go pray or something... so troublesome... i ended spending my time playing my PSP there... cause my bro and grandpa did everything too quickly... the go burn the holy paper for a short while then come back already... i was about the leave to house to go help them and they are back... haiz... now i've become useless... a white elephant... haha... but it's ok...

Practise was damn tiring today... when down at 2pm to practise with Ying Qing... practise ended at about 8pm... my energy had been drained throughout the day...my lunch was used up too early... and i drank too much water... i needed to go to the toilet but could not go... if not i'll be shivering like an idiot who enters a air-con room after forgetting to dry himself after shower... it's seriously damn cold in the room... so i could not leave the room cause i had already gotten used to the temperature... haha... so i bear with everything till i have a little chance to do the necessary... haha...

Today is my sister's concert... and i did not go... because of this 3 reasons... i am really tired after a whole day of practise... i'm really hungry and have no energy left... and i was plain lazy... i need to travel all the way to Tiong Bahru just to attend a concert... no way man... travel time would be hell long... and i don't have any concession... so it would damn expensive... so there you go... i'm sorry by the way... your concert dates are poorly decided... concert dates are just like wedding dates... you must pick a good day for the couple to get married... and you'll have to pick a good day for people to attend the concert... it's a pity it's not a good day today... my practise ended relatively late too... so what can i say... anyway, her concert dates were never good... her last concert was on my secondary school's concert day... and guess what, i was playing my solo then... so ended up not many of my family member turned up to watch me perform the solo... till today i'm still not very pleased with that... honestly speaking, this thing had been stuck in me for a hell long time... and it's pisses me off whenever i think to it... so your concert date sucks...


I bought Mr Laney... ok, that sounds real gay... Laney is not a person... it's my new second hand amp... $120... good buy... it sounded great... and i like it... but the fact is that i've spent more than $120 just to get the amp... not forgetting all the travelling... the $10 that i've just used to top up my damn card was used up in 4 days or so... so expensive lor... travel all the way to Clementi by bus... travelling alone have wasted a couple of hours... where is Clementi man... Malaysia? all the travelling had made Singapore feel so big... damn... for a moment i was wondering if the bus was still in Singapore... haiz... i think the government is trying hard to trick foreigners into thinking Singapore is one hell of a huge country... but i bet they don't the that there is such thing as a world map... where we can see barely see Singapore on them... haha... anyway, the amp is great man... i'm going to enjoy it for quite a long time... and i'm along reconsidering about buying the pedals... cause the amp had already given me all the sounds that i wanted... haha... so looks like it's a 3-in-1 thing... haha...


I think my hair is some harry potter magic shit... when practising with Ying Qing, my hair just on my head like some little good boy with a neat side parting going to stand at a corner when you asked him to stand there for no valid reason... but when full band practise starts, dammit.. my hair keeps on pkoing my eyes... them i keeps on making me flinch or something... i feel like an idiot whose brain is sending random signals to me head making me move my head about for no reason... dammit... it's hard to mantain such hair... i think i need a whip or something to go tame my hair... i wonder what magical powers do girls have... their hair so long... whne they eat it goes into their mouth and everything... and they don't feel a single bit bothered... damn... i need those powers man...

Haiz.. even when my brother is at home, i'm still the one eating all the remaining food and washing all the dishes... haiz... why? they think they very clever? no.. they are just plain lazy... especially my sister... she very **** up!! dammit lor... eat finish then run away saying that she got a stomachache... then ask everyone to wash her dishes for her... fuck man... the i last one to finish so i wash everything... then her bowl of soup still on the dining table... then i purposely don't wash.. ask her to go and wash it on her own since she had shit finish... guess what... she pretend to be deaf... and guess what she was doing... WATCHING TV!! deaf people also watch tv so nevermind... but she was watching Asian Idol!! Asian Idol don't need to watch.. listen can already... wha lao... want to pretend to be deaf also must do it properly right... no skill lor...


Haiz again... i hate the holidays... it's the time where i stay at home too much and don't get a chance to interact with people... then i start to think a lot... haiz... i feel like a loser... no activities... actually have... but everything is too last minute... so i did not go... when i want to go out, i need to spend money... haiz... i think i think too much... haiz...


Tomorrow i'll be buying my amp... finally... i've been practising for the past 2 days... play until my finger tips so pain... but it's ok... no pain, no gain... haha...


I'm out of ideas... the end i guess...

Ok man... back from a long day... today was YCKSB's concert... had my great morning was short lived as i realised my black shirt is with a junior while i was playing my PSP... i got really angry but i felt unreasonable... i am in the wrong too.. i should not be so last minute... and i should not have pushed all the blame to someone else... haiz... what a tiring day... i still remember there was flame stuck in my throat while i was playing for alumni band... and there was no rest till the part that i had to play loudly... so i sneaked an opportunity to "KKHHHAAAA" in one rest beat cause i had no time to wait... haha... hopefully it was not loud... i'm just afraid that it might be recorded... haha...


I shall not elaborate any further... i'm getting real tired... i've been on the guitar practising blues scale and some improvisation skills since i got home... and it was like 1am... and now it's 3am... and i'm beginning to feel sleepy... i guess all my ideas shall be on hold till tomorrow or something... hopefully i remember them though...

Today was exciting.. i mean the PSP game that i've been playing the whole day... i did the morning shift for today's open house...a few minutes after i settled down at my station, i was on with the PSP... i played like 8.45am to 2pm... haha... there were no dead people today... but there was the all-time drama-auntie HuiJun... damn... somethings just don't change... she tries to seduce me... but i'm still not interested... keep on try to be femaline with me... damn... it's not working and it'll never work... haha... when we went for a walk with Nardia and YanQin, HuiJun just go around collecting everything... damn auntie leh... then still go take the fake ***** and pass to me... damn disgusting... she is not a girl, not near a woman... but some scary pervert... yucks man... she'll never get married... at least to me for sure... dammit... enough with HuiJun... anyway, we went to visit Raphael and had some free food... sausage, bread, tuna, cheese.. everything was there... haha... had a great time eating... and i ended up wasting the $3 food voucher cause i could not finish the food... haha... the RC celebrated YanQin birthday too... haha... all the interesting plans before everything... haha... i went to visit the New Media booth today and guess what.. i'm still not very sure about my diploma... haha... it's about one year now... and i still have little knowledge... haha... but it's ok... i'm only looking forward to the end product... haha...


I realised some similarities between my mum and i over dinner today... we love to complain... but she is more pro than me... she can complain about me complaining... even i can't do that... haha... but there is still a difference... she like to bulldoze her way through conversations... she jumps into conclusions and bulldoze her way through everything... she likes to interrupt people and go all out to say her conclusion way before anyone can say the main idea of the conversation... and it's very annoying... that's why i don't bother telling her things that i know she would jump into conclusions...


I need a pay rise... i think i need to do up a powerpoint and prove my point to my parents... until today, i'm getting the same amount my brother gets 3 years ago... and you know the currency inflation, estimated to be 3% every year... so my brother's $1 3 years ago have more spending power than the $1 i'm holding today... am i not right to say that? and to top that, everything had been getting more expensive... bus fare raised from 65cents to 67cents... bus concession raised from $45 to $52... ERP increase, petrol increase... even my duck rice raised from $2.50 to $3... i bet gyming was only $1.20 in the past... and now it's $1.50... i'm not getting enough pocket money... maybe that's why i'm finding it hard to save... damn...


I hate being the only guy in my family... my bro is in camp and my dad is in America till next week... and it sucks... my mama cooks a lot of food and expect me to finish everything... not just that, my mama even up size my rice portion... i have so much rice and my sister and mama don't eat a lot of the other food and leave everything else to me... and if i were to finish the leftovers, i'll have to wash ALL the plates... and you know how long it takes to wash ALL the dishes... with no help... damn... i'm rushing to finish my food first so that my sister will do the washing but i ended up doing everything before i have to finish all the food... and when i wash the dishes, i do it very systemically... i always wash the smallest items before washing the big stuff... so that i can stack them up for drying... and little did i know, some idiot go sneak a fork under all the big plates... after i've washed the utensils and little soup bowls, a fork appeared out of nowhere among the plates... dammit... although it no trouble, but it's damn annoying... haiz... that's life after all... there is always some fool out there trying very hard to spoil your day...


I realised my folding blanket skills are getting better... this means i'm using the blanket more often... damn... it waste 2 minutes of my morning just to fold the blanket... maybe i should just hide my blanket somewhere so that my bed looks neat.. even without the blanket... maybe i can deposit my blanket on my brother's bed in the morning... after all he's only back on weekends and maybe wednesday nights... i just do what i do to my washed clothes... leave them on his bed till thursday morning before i pack everything up... haha... standard routine since by bro had been coming back only on weekends... haha...


Tomorrow is YCKSB's big day... and everything will be fine... i know... haha... and i need an early night... need to get some good sleep so that i'll be more prepared for tomorrow... haha... and guess what.. i've forgotten everything that i want to blog about today... so guess i'll end here for today... and people, SSW concert tickets are still up for sale... don't miss that twice a year chance.. to see me get my hair neat... i promise if you people come i'll do something about my hair... haha...

This christmas is going to be exciting... haha... i shall not elaborate...


Haiz... holidays had already started... and i just realised that my first week is very packed with activities... and holidays are not a good time to catch up on my lack of sleep problems... it's the holidays man... why waste the time? haha... that's the problem with me... now i'm never going to get proper sleep... even on a happy weekend, i still fall asleep in the train on the way to my grandma's place... haiz... looks like the only time i can catch up on my sleep is whn i'm travelling... my train concession just ended... today... so now i must pay money to sleep... haiz...


I'M SHRINKING!!! AT A VERY QUICK RATE!!! i think it's the result of having little sleep... haiz... why? i'll just go push myself harder...


Yesterday went to town to pass stuff to Tricia with Yvonne and HuiJun and we walked a hell lot... at least i know i've walked damn lot... i'm not sure about the others... well, they are girls afterall, everlasting leg power... strong enough to walk for hours non-stop... haiz... some things i really wish to have... maybe i should go change sex before every NAFA test... at least i can overcome my weakest station... haha...


ok peeps... no more... the end... i need my sleep... tomorrow still have RP Open House duty to do... haiz... must wake up damn early... goodnight...

Haiz... seems like everyone is attending wedding dinners... but I'M NOT!! i think i also want to attend a wedding dinner too... the last time i attended one was like when i was secondary 1 or something... i also want to attend a wedding dinner soon... if nobody is getting married then i'll have to force people to get married or something... i guess i'll spike my brother's drink with viagra and bring home his ex-classmate or something... then he'll get horny and VOOAAHLAA!!! i have a sister-in-law.. or maybe a brother-in-law... then i'll have a wedding dinner to attend... haha...


I think the god of rain hates me... he just keeps on pee down at the wrong time... and that made my day suck... real bad... mine is not just some normal rain coming and going to spoil my day... but this rain was very well planned... firstly, i must emphasize that my shoes were damn dry before i left school... when i was about the leave for school, it was raining damn heavily... so i took the long dry path... but sadly, the pavements would flood everytime it rains... so my shoe got a little wet and my socks turned a little soggy... after going through all the trouble, i finally reached the MRT station... and guess what.. it had stopped raining... dammit lah... i got a little unhappy at first... but it's ok... i won't let such things spoil my day... next.. i finally reached YCK MRT... it was raining damn heavily... so heavy that your vision turn blurred... it was terribly wet... but i had no choice... there isn't a dryer path to my secondary school... i had no choice but to use my umbrella... and you know how much i hate using an umbrella... but it's ok... i'll sacrifice just this once... although it's the second time already... my shoes got really wet and my socks were soaked... damn uncomfortable... but i just kept on walking... and by the time i reach my secondary school, the damn rain had stopped... shit man... damn annoying... i really don't understand why i'm i getting all this... i must have saw the god of rain peeing by accident... i must have mistaken his ***** for a moon or something... damn...


Today is the last day of school for the year... everyone is real happy... but IT'S THE CONCERT SEASON!! the time of the year where many bands perform publicly... that's not important... but yesterday was the last day for facilitator Jason Chen... he is going to some Singapore university to do research work... haiz... what a nice guy... he finally gave me an A after 12 weeks of lesson... he is also a very good facilitator... he understand teenagers very well and he always try to make the lesson interesting... and he is one smart guy... he only break the news to us when the lesson ended... and by doing so, i did not get a chance to get a pizza treat for the class from him... haiz... what is smart ass... haha...


I hate SEA games... it's a waste of television air time... they keep on showing all these live shows and there is nothing interesting left for me to watch... i don't see the joy of watching people swim to and fro in an oversize swimming pool... haiz... so boring...


Check this video out... i stumble upon is by chance...

Her vocal power are just plain POWER!! damn nice... it sounded very nice... but the lyrics makes no sense... but it's ok... and the best thing about the video is that she is damn pretty... she has everything to make the perfect Sam's-Cup-of-Coffee... damn... she reminds me of someone i once knew... haha... damn... the only thing that is an obstacle is her age... my guess is that she is 4 years older than me... assumption from her youtube nice... but it's ok... either i go for way older girls or look for a girl what is almost alike around my age... i know i'll find that person one day... haha...

I hate christmas... cause i'll need to spend money to buy presents... why "the season of giving"? i think they need to rename it... "the season of taking" would sound way better... haiz... there goes my money... over and over again... bought lollipops for my classmates today... just something seriously random... i don't know why i did it... but i did it anyway... don't be jealous W15H... you'll get something too... that's way i'm complaining about spending money for christmas... haiz... and that is the problem of having too many friends... i've been blessed and cursed by the RP system... AHH!!!


I feel damn guilty today... i verbally abused Ali today... and i think i went a little overboard... i think i really insulted him a little too bad... it's been damn long since i did such a thing... even if i were to make fun of others, i always practise self-control... but today it seems that i was not myself... i was having fun at the expense of others... can't really show you what i said to him... nobody videoed anything nor did i saved my chat log... the whole time i was insulting his intelligence and stuff... i really feel damn damn bad... i think i've gotten myself a hell lot of bad karma... and i think i've gotten everything back... i'll further elaborate... haiz... i need to be nice to Ali... i'll try my very best... i have to... if not one day he come into class with a pair of waterguns and start killing everyone in class... damn scary... there are quite a number of cases in America now... lets not make Singapore the next...

Now is part 2 of my terrible life... about the retribution i've received today... HuiJun asked me not to blog about this... but i'll just do it anyway... i was hell on earth i tell you... HuiJun was tried to seduce me... and it's not working... be she kept insisting... she was not making me aroused... she was making me SICK!! sick in the stomach... i feel like puking man... then she used the perfume sample from BodyShop to whip me and wipe the smell on me... now my mum is going to think i've been out with a girl... and girls will think i'm attached... and that is terrible... haiz... i'm so ill fated... i may be a happy single, but i don't plan to be a happy single through out my life... damn... i'm prepared to face all consequences for this paragraph... there are 2 things i can do... first is to face it, second is to RUN BEFORE HUIJUN TRIES TO GET ME HORNY!!!


Shit.. i think my laptop has a virus... the time just keeps on changing... since yesterday... dammit... so annoying...


Ok... time to do something that i've not been doing... STUDY!!! AHHH!!! i need to study up before my laptop battery dies... damn... i'm not going to my charger out if it dies.. althought it's just a few steps away from me... and my lappy is take a hell lot of time to download one 6P... fucking VPN... why must force us to use it at home? now all my download speed is fucking slow... can't even study... dammit... want to study, no 6P... want to wait for the 6P download, my lappy's battery has only 34 minutes left... haiz... so troublesome... i might have to skip this rare study time... haiz... i think i have no future already...

WHHOOO!!! here are some nice pedals want to get... just 3 for now... each piece is about $175... haha...


First in the list, Bad Monkey... for my overdriven solos...


Next, Chorus Factory...for rhytme guitar for slower songs...


Lastly, Metal Master... This one for heavier effect on the rhytme guitar... for solos too... This one Yong Jie selling... i can get it at a lower price... haha...

And for the amp, Yong Jie also have lobang... $120 for a 30W... 2 effects... but my effects will come from my pedals... haha... time to chiong jobs!!! I LOVE MONEY!!!

WHHOOO!!! i'm having dinner at 10.30pm... in fact, i'm still eating dinner now... haha... just got home not long ago... haha... that's not important...


Wah... today rain damn lot... on the way back to my secondary school, it was raining like shit man... damn... i was forced to use my umbrella.. ella.. ella.. eh.. eh.. it was like months since i opened it... other than the time Tricia use it to block the sun on the way to the MRT station... dammit... i hate using my umbrella.. it's such a nuisance... i don't want to wet my bag and stuff... and i especially hate bring a wet umbrella up a bus or train... i end up wetting everybody and myself in the process... haiz... this rain gotta stop real soon...


I'm beginning to find that people management is one hell of a thing... haiz... i just don't understand why the best are so arrogant... i hate it when they start to throw tantrums and get angry over small things... haiz... i always look up on such people... people with supreme displine... now i'm having second thoughts... i rather be dumb and happy then be clever and hates everything around them... haiz... 4 weeks and 3 more days left to endure...


I think i have to watch shows in class really soon... RP lifestyle has no room for rest and free time... i feel like re-watching Band of Brothers... 10 chapters... total about 8 hours at least... the last time i watched it with my family, it took us 3 days to finish it... now it';; just be me and the laptop... guess it's going to take me at least 1 week to finish it in school... one of those happy days back then, i was chatting with Jerry about all this war movies... and i've only watched one of them... and that's Band of Brothers... Jerry had the pirated one and it was pretty hard to see anything... and the speech and sound effects were not too good either... it's a pity... after watching for so many hours, he'll have to re-watch it again... cause i have the DVD...


I feel so lucky... christmas is round the corner and there are gonna be lots of DISCOUNTS!!! damn all my dream presents are so damn expensive... the first in my wish list and it's a must have by the end of this year is a guitar amplifier... estimated price, $400 - 500... hopefully the year end discounts can low the price further... haha... after that dream is fulfilled, i'll start to buy all my pedals... not bicycle pedals but guitar effect pedals... estimated price, $175 per piece... i've planned to buy 1 every 2 months next year... cause according to my saving plans, i would be able to save quite a sum in 2 months... perfect for a pedal... haha... if i'm low on cash, i guess i'll have to steal them... now i need to do a little research... looking for a cheap good clean amp... will buy it by the end of the year... and that's like a few more days away... 2 and half month break, i'm going to chiong work... i'm going to be a millionaire before the holiday ends... WHHOOO!!! i like my plans... i think i'll follow it...


TIME CHECK: 11:37PM
Time to go shower and wash the dishes...

WHHOOO!!! MY RIGHT BREAST CAN JUMP!!! ok.. that was unnecessary... but i want to make then even... make sure both can jump... haha... then it'll be fun... i hope...


Gyming now had become a very shrt thing... in the past, we gym for about 2 hours on an average every session... but now, it takes only 1hour 30mins... haha... more exercise in a short time... how did i do it? haha... the secret is less breaks... haha... this also mean more pain... and more blood rush... haha... it's been long since i worked my shoulders... haha...


It's been raining a lot lately... and i feel so.. GOOD!!! WHHOOO!!! it's so cooling... and every morning the "perfect sleeping temperature" is there... i really love the rain... but to a certain extend only... the problem with this raining season is that it's always raining at the wrong time... the rain can fall anytime... just don't rain when i'm on the way to school and away from school... and please don't rain when i'm travelling from one point to another... it sucks man... my socks gets soggy and everything... damn...


There is something with some W15H girls and my msn nicks and PMs... strangely, their names had been appearing up there... haiyo... so troublesome... after they change i can't change back... cause don't even remember my own nick and stuff... how to change back? too bad for myself...


I need to have some early nights real soon... i've been feeling really tired and sleepy for the past few days... i find it hard to concentrate on anything... not even in school... but my ideas are still all there... haha... that brings up another thing i want to bring up... i'm really sorry for not contributing to the group discussion today... but i've also helped to spot out a lot of your mistakes in the worksheet and help you clarify your doubts whenever you have any... i'm also sorry that i did not help to prepare the presentation... but i've spotted the error in the presentation while we present... the error you made... and now, you just blame me for not checking the powerpoint before we presented.. is that all you can do? if you are so smart why don't you do everything on your own... and when you are so smart, why do you still make mistakes? and why do you blame it on others? i really hate being blamed for something i did not do... i don't mind you being stubborn and disagree with everybody's ideas... but have you realised that sometimes we are right? and the worst part is that you are so stubborn that you keep on insisting on your answers even though your answer is not answering the faci's question...please lah... i admire your brains... only to a certain extend... i don't see why you just can't process the faci's question and answer it... an if you can't, jolly well let others answer it for you... you just keep on repeating your own answer over and over again and the faci just keeps on repeating his questions over and over again... and still you don't get the message... you end up forcing the faci into submission when he gave up asking his question... sometimes i really wonder how can a person be so smart and dumb at the same time... haiz... no point being unhappy...

Ok.. today was a pretty long day... first event, grandpapa's birthday celebration... all the granduncle and people all came down... so many unfamiliar faces... and the worst part is my family follows the hierarchy greetings very strictly... and I DON'T KNOW HOW TO GREET A LOT OF PEOPLE!!! i just anyhow call "susu(uncle)" and "gugu(auntie)"... and if the people seem really old, i just add a "lao(old)" in front... haha... but there are quite some people which i still know how to greet... many people seemed so foreign... and many did not recognise me as well... haha... many said i got bigger... haha... some self-satisfaction there... haha... anyway, i got a chance to meet En Qi... damn cute... took 2 pictures of her... haha... but my photography skill is not up to YanQin's level yet... well, it'll never be...




Next event, birthday celebration for grandmama... this time it's my maternal grandmama... grandpapa was paternal... nothing much really happened... i know everyone there and everyone knows me... the thing that i remember well is falling asleep under the television... haha... but the cake tasted pretty good... haha...


Mama bought new pillows for everyone... it's soft... and big... in fact, it's too big... my neck is lifted a few centimetres up and it feels kind of weird... haiz... the smell is gone... but it's ok... hopefully the pillow gets seasoned quickly...

Haiz... after what happened today during the talk, my blog was featured in my group's presentation... about the fake identity... my identity is not fake on my blog lor... everyone knows what they are reading and who is writing all the stuff... but it's ok... whatever that happened to me during the talk had helped me for my presentation... i used the event as an example to explained some stuff in my presentation... haha... every action has a reaction... i suffer a little while then enjoy myself later...

Now it's a Saturday... the paragraph above is written yesterday and i stopped for the day...

Anyway, went for a little shopping yesterday after school... walked all over the place... damn damn tired...


Now for today... headed down to Raphael's place for 6.40... really lost touch of the game... it's been so long since i played it... the last time i played it was during the class chalet... haha... and to top that, i was really sleepy... god knows why... i can bearly concentrate on anything... after my turn in the game, my mind would just go blank till someone tap me and wake me up from my paradise city... haha... damn sorry people... i'm physically there... but mentally somewhere else... haha... left early because i had band practise in the evening... Yvonne left with me... we both had a great nap on the way to CWP... had a quick dinner then off to band...


I hate drivers that uses Yio Chu Kang Road... that is the little road i had to cross everyday to get home... today, like every other day, drivers were happily speeding across the road... don't they know the speed limit? even i, who have not taken my Basic Theory Test, knows that car should not be driving at such a speed... dammit... what if they knock down a jaywalker like me? bloody idiot... while i was crossing today, there was one driver who "flash flash" at me... fucker... slow down the damn car lah... expect me to walk faster or not cross the road at all? knock me down if you dare... i have a long life... i have nothing to worry... next time i'll go invent a device that will clamp the wheels of cars which are speeding... watch out...


I think this christmas, i'll be buying myself a gift... my family gift exchange tradition had died many years ago... since the day i was told Santa Claus was fake, there was no more gift exchange at home... in fact i realised Santa was not real even before i was told... and that was like when i was in kindergarten... don't you know how it feels to realise such a terrible lie at such a young age? damn i must be a really sad kid... but it's ok... since the day i started saving money, i always buy myself a present for christmas... afterall, it's the season of giving... well, for this year i'm planning to get myself something heavy... literally heavy... i'm planning to buy myself a pair of ankle weights... as heavy as possible... so that i can train my legs... i had this wish for almost 1 and a half year now... see, i have so much unfulfilled wishes... another reason why i won't die so soon... i'm getting this for myself cause it's beyond budget for the gift exchange with W15H... by the way, i have not have any idea to buy for the person i've picked... haha... i'll have to guess and make miracles... haha...

I'll never attend talks in school anymore... firstly, talks are long and boring and exiting the hall takes almost forever... Next, people anyhow use my laptop and do funny stuff on my msn... all thanks to Tricia(mastermind) and Charlene(accomplice), they ruined my future by changing my display picture into some naked woman and changed my nick to some stuff... then start chatting with everyone else... haiz...

Went for a little shopping yesterday at Novena Square and United Square with Yvonne, Yan Qin and Jerry... thanks for companying me... had a geat dinner at PizzaHut... had a great chat too... the ladies a little crazy about photo taking... if you want to see the pictures, go visit Yvonne's blog... go see my link... i'm too lazy to do up any hyper link or whatever... shopped for toys at Toys R' Us... for 3 people... my niece, who is turning 1, Tan HuiMin and myself... there's a kid in me afterall... so no harm buying some toys for self entertainment... i got Ah Tan and i a Rubisk Cube... there is this craze going about the class and it's damn fun... gotta catch'em allget one of those and practise at home... and guess what i got for my not-even-1-year-old niece... i got her something nobody would be able to give her... i.. gave.. her.. NOTHING!!! just like my sister... and it's all because of my lousy siblings... everything ask me to buy... i'm a 17, going 18 man-to-be... how in the blue hell i'm i suppose to buy a 1 year and below gift? damn... i had a hard time deciding to buy nothing... anyway, there is one thing that i can give my little niece that nobody can give... i can give her love... haha... anyway, i'll have to go for a round 2 shopping again... thanks to the lazy/useless people who sits at home and watch the television the whole day... haiz... i think i'll have to give them a purpose in life... i'll go buy a hundred few packs of tissue tomorrow... so that they can help the family bring in some income... my sister shall sell her tissue outside a sony gallery... this is so as she can watch the television and sell the tissue at the same time... and for my brother, he'll have to find a place where i can dispose all his complains... i don't have such a place in mind yet... but i think he'll find his way about... haiz...


I received some zodiac thing from a friend of mine... looks like 2008 is a pretty bad year for a horse man... a year filled with bad luck and stuff... well, i guess i'll just have to adapt my parents' way of believeing such things... believe only the good things... haha... but too bad for me, there seems to be nothing good for me to believe in... haha... but it's ok... cause words can't bring me down...

Haiz... i have limits... and they can be met soon... it's up to your actions... you go decided for yourself...

Haiz... i feel like i've let the whole of W15H down... after all the planning just now in Mac after dinner, my mum just said one word... "No"... i'm really really sorry everyone... all of you had high hopes about the event... and now everything is down to nothing but trash... i'm really really sorry... i've tried to convince my mum... but she just won't allow it... she'll only allow the New Year overnight stay... nothing more than that... i'm really really sorry... i've let you guys down...


Haiz... another mess i've made up is the concert dates... i've been telling everyone 22nd of December... but when i saw the tickects today, it says "28th December"... dammit...why i'm i so damn stupid... how did i get the 22nd date in the first place? i found the date in my handphone and have been telling everyone my concert is on the 22nd of December at least 2 months ago... and now, out of the blue... haiz... now everyone much adjust to come for my concert... i won't be surprised if many of my friends won't turn up for my concert... it's so impossible to make such last mintute changes for a concert... haiz... it's ok anyway... cause it's only the last concert that i have so many friends attending my concert... everything before is just a hand full of people... people like my family... well, i should not expect too much for myself too... haiz... my life sucks...


And now i'm having some problems which i can't speak of... i need a guy's listening ear... this problem too confidential for girls to hear... wanted to talk to my gym buddies today... but no gyming... all of them have an important exam to study for... haiz... i think i can go and die...

What a beautiful saturday morning... the sunlight shines warmly into the room and the breeze gently blow the night curtains above my sleeping brother... what a perfect morning... i wish i can see such a scene, without my brother sleeping under the window, every morning... haiz... good things never last...

After practise, Chun Bok, Jocelyn and i headed to Mitchell's place for dinner... his place is damn beautiful... so spacious... such a beautiful house... and all the technology there... it could be a gaming paradise... haha... after everything, hitched a ride by Chun Bok's uncle to get somewhere near home... while walking home, i realised the sky was very beautiful... half white, half deep blue... damn beautiful... and i walked home without my music today... enjoyed the sound of nature... damn nice... nature is so beautiful... we just don't enjoy it... or do we have a chance to enjoy it? we are all living in a fast pace world... there is no time to slow down and enjoy the beauty around you... the world is changing every moment... the moment you slow down, even for a short while, you will be way behind everything... people usually treasure things after they have lost them... why don't we just slow down and enjoy the nature that will be gone very soon... haiz...


If i can make a wish for christmas that will definately come true, will wish for 3 wishes... ok.. maybe i'll not be so greedy this christmas... i guess i'll just wish for a special pencil... one so special that i'll never lose it... why this strange wish you might ask... i remembered i bought 3 mechnical pencils about 4-5 months back... all dark green in colour... and today, i realised that i've only have 1 left... the other 3 are all lost... i just saw the W15H blog just now while tying this paragraph... Tricia had a really good idea for our gift exchange... and i realised that it would be risky to put up this paragraph... if not the person who gets my name will buy me a hell lot of pencils... but it's ok... i'm going to make sure i'm one step ahead... i'll go buy myself some pencils on monday(if i remember)... and the person with my name will not be able to buy me pencils!! haha...


Ok peeps... time for supper... there is still practise tomorrow... concerts coming soon... and i promise i'll cut my nails tomorrow... goodnight...