Adios, 2008!

I can't believe I have let it get this bad. I have waited so long to post anything that it's too intimidating to think about reporting in detail on Christmas or the last couple of weeks in general, so I'll just give a brief summary:

Keaton is alive. We got a new TV. It looks pretty much like the "old" one, except it cost about 1/3 of what the original cost. Gotta love technology. Life goes on.

We had a nice Christmas with my sister and her family. They drove all the way from Erie, PA to hang with us, which of course proves how awesome we are. Maybe I'll post pictures, or maybe I won't (if I am already giving myself an out, I probably won't).

I got a beautiful new niece as a late Christmas present. I was sure she would be a nephew, but I'll forgive her for making a liar out of me because she is so cute.

Boone just retrieved a bag of rice cakes from my hand with his left foot. Gross/cool.

I am training for a half marathon with my awesome friend Sarah. She's like 4'3" or something, but that chick is tough and keeps me on my toes. And then I REALLY tower over her:)

Moon Sand is of the devil. Ask me how I know (hint: it rhymes with "it takes 45 minutes to clean up after a 30 minute play session and sticks to more than just itself").

It is difficult to explain to a 2 year old what "We got a new DVR and we don't have 'Fetch with Ruff Ruffman' anymore" means. Why I have a 2 year old who cares about that is beyond me. The show is on PBS, geared for 3rd and 4th graders, and is mostly science experiment based. Whatever.

So yeah. That's about it. I'll try to return to regular posting now that I've gotten back on the horse. Happy New Year that I forgot about until around lunchtime today.

P.S. Is it just me, or does anyone else think it is beyond cruel to keep putting Dick Clark on TV for the countdown? Maybe he wants to do it, but come on -- enough is enough. It's painful to watch.

I'm gonna kill him

You know that middle child I mentioned in the last post? Well, he just threw a train at our LCD TV screen and broke it. And it wasn't paid off yet. And the replacement part is $1400. And we just gave away our other TV ON SATURDAY.

I'm FUMING.

Keaton

Okay. So I have been meaning to post about this for awhile now, but I just haven't been able to decide how to frame the information. I have wrestled with sharing this for a number of reasons: I don't want Keaton to be labeled; I don't want pity; and I don't want our family to be looked at any differently.

However.

I also don't want any perception that I am trying to hide anything, and I think certain tendencies/stories will make more sense if everyone has the whole story on our charming little imp. Heck, maybe it will even help someone feel better about their own situation. I know it has helped me to read about people who face some of the same challenges we do. So...

We are pretty sure that Keaton has Asperger's Syndrome. For those of you who aren't familiar with it, it is a developmental disorder that is most easily described (by me anyway) as "mild autism". He was evaluated a year ago and given a PDD-NOS diagnosis, which basically means, "something is off but we aren't sure what it is."

After another year, we are pretty sure that the "something" is Asperger's. We are waiting on another formal diagnosis to confirm all of this, but have been told by several speech therapists and others who work with special needs kids that they would be stunned if it was something else.

I have known something was wrong since Keaton was about 2. I had a lot of people tell me I was just comparing a first-born daughter to a second-born son, but I knew better than that. This means that none of this is a shock to me, and in retrospect, I feel like I was prepared throughout my life in a few different ways to recognize the little "quirks" for what they really were.

Developmental delays are different for every child, but I will tell you what Asperger's means for Keaton.

Keaton was slow to talk. He caught up fairly well, but still struggles with syntax. He explains things in odd ways. He can't use "he" and "she" correctly in sentences, but he will tell you, "girls are called 'she' and boys are called 'he'". He has asked me a "why?" question exactly twice in his life, and both happened in a 48 hour period a few weeks ago. He never pointed at things as a toddler. He has poor eye contact. He will avoid looking at your eyes if at all possible, especially when he is being disciplined or corrected. Lately, he has started averting his eyes whenever he feels shy too.

He takes things very literally, and misses a lot of social cues. He loves other children, but usually can't play with them longer than about 5 minutes before they separate away from him or he from them. Rylan and Branik are the exceptions to that rule. He cannot sit still for a library story time and has a hard time in preschool and church when he is expected to stay in one place and listen to what someone else is saying. He blurts things out, and cannot control his impulses in group settings.

Sometimes a certain song or TV show that he has been exposed to numerous times with no problems will suddenly become upsetting to him. Like "run out of the room screaming with hands clapped over ears" upsetting. Sometimes an unexpected change ("I forgot, we need to get gas before we go to speech") is more than he can handle -- he thrives on routine.

Probably the most noticeable thing about Keaton is his obsession with random objects. They change from time to time, but have included volcanoes, tornadoes, swordfish (seriously), meteors, school buses, Harold the Helicopter, and Toby the Tram engine. If you have been reading my blog for awhile, I am sure you have noticed me mentioning these things with some regularity.

He loves the number 7 and the letter "Y". When a show comes on TV with the rating of "Y7" he goes ballistic with excitement. He sometimes freaks out in the car if I try to listen to any track on any CD other than numbers 7 and 17. He can keep a running total of how many school buses we have passed over a 4 hour period of errands/appointments.

A lot of people with Asperger's Syndrome do not like physical contact, but I feel really, really lucky that Keaton is so affectionate. He doesn't have the sleep issues that many children with Asperger's have. He isn't picky about textures and has escaped the intestinal problems that many people deal with. He does still suck his thumb when he is tired or upset, and puts his hands in his mouth when he is trying to learn something, so I do think there is a bit of an oral fixation, but it's relatively mild.

The flip side of all these challenges and quirks? Keaton is brilliant in many ways. He will refer to me as "He" most of the time, but he can read. He has been able to write his alphabet legibly since he was barely 3. He writes out full sentences without asking for help. He can count over 100 objects, but usually stops at 77, because what's better than two sevens together? He can name all the planets in their correct order. He has serious artistic abilities, and I have the walls to prove it.

He remembers things -- tiny details -- like nobody else. For example, a few weeks ago, I found a row of books in a straight line extending from our front door through the living room -- probably a good 20 feet of open books. I thought maybe it was a track for trains or something he was planning to walk on. What I discovered (through watching him do it again later) was that Keaton had stood in front of our bookcase, pulled about 17 books off the shelf, and opened them to a specific page before lining them up. The common link? Each page had a baked good on it. A pie, a cake, a plate of cookies, a muffin. He knew from memory which ones would suit his needs, and these from among over 200 books.

So what does this mean for Keaton long term? Nobody knows for sure. He is up for some challenges, especially as he tries to learn how to behave appropriately with his peers. But I have a lot of hope that he will eventually learn how to cope with the things that trigger his erratic behavior. My biggest hope is that Keaton will be happy in his life, whatever that means for him.

There are days when I think I can barely hang on through one more meltdown in a store, especially with all the looks I get from strangers who just think my kid is a brat. There are days I think I'll lose it if I have to listen to Track 7 one more time. There are days I just hide out at home because I don't want to chase him when he gets away from me or have to explain to the cashier that he DESPERATELY needs for her to acknowledge that "Keaton saw 5 buses!" on the way to the store.

But there are also days when he is so in tune that it takes my breath away. There are days he looks right at me and says, "Mommy, I was the pledge leader today! And everyone likes me!" There are days when he interacts with other children in such a "normal" way that Boone and I point it out to each other. Those are the days I live for.

And through all of this, Keaton manages to charm almost everyone he meets. He has a smile to melt any heart, and dimples to die for. His quirks are such a part of him that I can hardly imagine him without them, and honestly, losing some of them would make me sad. And let's face it -- Keaton's antics provide most of my material for this blog. The kid can be freaking hilarious and is teaching me to look at a lot of things differently.

I want to end this on a positive note and share one of Keaton's latest interests with you. A few weeks ago, Keaton grabbed our camera and started taking pictures. I hovered over him at first, but it became quickly apparent that he was going to be very careful and that he was really fascinated. He wandered around the house for over an hour until he filled the memory stick up, and then put the camera back where he found it.

Later on, I loaded the card into the laptop and got a great look into the things that are important to Keaton. I deleted quite a few (there were hundreds over 3 or 4 "sessions") but thought it would be interesting for others to see what he captured:


Lots of Toby. And why does he love Toby so much? Because Toby ends in "y" and is the number 7 engine. Duh.

An ordinary toy ice cream cone? Nope. It's a volcano to Keaton. He slept with this for a few weeks. You may also remember that he had a volcano cake for his 4th birthday, and then dressed up as a volcano for Halloween that year.

This is how he prefers to look at it. I had probably 25 shots like this.

This is classic. Can you tell what it says? "Volcano exbrt" = Volcano expert. I found this one night after he was in bed. He didn't ask me about any of it, just declared himself so.




A swordfish. By itself and then on his leg. Because who DOESN'T want to be as close to a swordfish as they can, right?


I have no idea why this was fascinating, but again, several battery shots.


I think here Keaton was just trying to get the dumptruck in the shot, but when he saw his foot, he got a new idea: self portraits!


First the feet...

...then the face. First attempt...

...then the second...


...and finally, SUCCESS! The face shots ended with this one. He must have been satisfied.

Then he moved on to other people. He got Branik many times because they are home a lot together. He made sure to get one of Grandma while she was taking one of him.

He has some of every family member, but I am having trouble uploading more photos, so I'll have to get the extreme close ups of Boone's nose another time:)

So he loves all these things, but the thing most frequently photographed is his blanket. Up close, draped over furniture, thrown casually on the floor -- he has every possible angle of that blanket well documented.






So clearly I took the last one, but how did he end up in that postition? I love how chilled out he is, laying on top of the toy food drawers, feet in the blinds, sucking his thumb while hanging upside down. Whatever.

So that's that. Hopefully that explained a little of what is going on with Keaton to those of you who didn't already know. We love him to pieces and are working hard to get him the help he needs in the areas he struggles with. It isn't easy, but he's worth the work!

P.S. Feel free to ask us any questions if you have them. I just wasn't sure how much info to include here but I will talk about anything. Really, I will.

You WISH you were this cool!

Send your own ElfYourself eCards


Thanks for the idea, Sara:)

Funny/clever title here.

So my mom and sister came out for a very brief Thanksgiving visit, and in between 2 more trips to the hospital (I think I have earned my free visit on my punchcard now), we decided to let the kids open their Christmas presents from Grandma. We figured that way she would get to see them play with their gifts, and also cut down on the chaos on Christmas. I don't know about your kids, but ours get a little overwhelmed on Christmas morning, and all they really want to do is play with the toy they just opened -- not necessarily open more gifts.

Anyway, they were all thrilled and really enjoyed Grandma and Caitlin's visit. Here's the proof:

This is funny only if you know how much my mom wants our cats to leave her alone. They have some spidey sense though when it comes to people who don't like them + bonus points for the black pants = "Mom the cat magnet".


Ry and Caiti reading books -- Rylan will read to anyone who will listen to her, and Caiti needed to practice anyway (love you Caiti:)

Branik had a lot of fun with "Aunt Tatey" and really enjoyed the tickle-fest.


He also enjoys trying to catch the camera.


Onto the gifts. Rylan got a wooden doll cradle that she hopes will be filled with a new baby doll in about 26 days. This is all because of Cilka and Payton's visit in October. As long as she isn't still saying, "I wish I had a real baby in my tummy" in another 5 years, I'm cool with it.

She also got Boggle Jr. and will cream you if you agree to play her. It's a double whammy to have your children suck your brains out (ie "Mom brain") and then use them against you in board games.


Keaton died and went to heaven over his new helicopter. It spins it's 2 rotors, it rolls on the floor, and it makes a rocket blasting noise. This could have been his whole Christmas and he would have been happy. Seriously, he kept saying over and over, "Grandma, I love my new helicopter!" and "This makes me so happy!"


See, he wasn't kidding.

He got a huge pad of art paper and his own markers too, and look what he wanted to draw:


Yeah. So he was thrilled. He is sleeping with the helicopter, and keeps reminding us that Grandma gave it to him.

Branik got a really cute Take Along Thomas engine wash and a new little James engine, along with a John Deere dumptruck that he uses to transport his trains in. You know, because trains need a ride to get from place to place. I should have taken a picture of him playing with the whole setup. I didn't. Mom saw it and that's all that matters:)

Oh yeah, and we had Thanksgiving dinner. I have no pictures of any of it, and trust me, you don't want them anyway. I seriously didn't even shower until bedtime that night, and I'm only about 37% sure I was wearing a bra at the table. It turns out making pies and rolls and turkey is time consuming and leaves very little motivation to photograph the fruits of your labors. But it all tasted great and I feel confident now that I am not lying when I say, "I CAN cook, I just choose not to".

So yeah. Good times. Watching how excited the kids were with just a couple of gifts made me think, "Why do we bother with getting more than this?" It doesn't really seem like tripling the presents equals triple the fun. I think it's more about the adults than the kids when you go overboard (like I always want to do). And now I will quit my rant before I sound like a scrooge.

We are so glad we could spend even a few days with family, and can't wait to live closer. Thanks for coming out Mom and Caiti!

P.S. Go see "Bolt" with your kids -- we did and it was really cute.

P.P.S. The special-ed effects in "Twilight" are just as bad the second time around. But Edward is just as hot. Just so you know.

Odds and Ends

I just don't have anything to say. Or something. Here are a bunch of random things to munch on while you are waiting for dinner...

I am going to start with a few pics specifically for all my UMC gals. Here is your proof that Chrysta is in fact alive and does have a bouncing baby boy -- albeit a clumsy one:)

1 baby + 1 Scentsy (scented wax melter) = FUN!

Yeah. So Chrysta'a Keaton (we call him K2) grabbed the cord and the wax holder shattered and splattered orange spice wax all over his head -- Gorbachev-style. We sort of freaked out right at first, but Scentsy wax melts much cooler than normal candle wax and he was not hurt at all. He didn't even cry until his cruel parents picked the wax off his head. He smelled fantastic!

See? Happy as a clam. A really, really cute, orange spice scented clam. With blue eyes.

OK. Onto my own spawn. I mentioned earlier that Rylan is in ballet now, but this was the first look I got at her in class. She won't "do her moves" outside the studio, so I had no idea how she was doing. I'll say this: she looks GREAT on the barre.

Did I say she looks great on the barre yet? I did? Well, she does. Very graceful. She loves to tell me, "Ballerinas always have long necks." Things get a little but dicey once she is on the floor, but the girl moves FAST. So fast I couldn't get a decent shot of her. I'll work on that.

Keaton drew this on the wall in our hallway last week. I'm telling you, Toby is next year's Harold.

I had been meaning to paint that hallway anyway, so I got to it a few days after this piece was completed, but I'll admit it was hard for me to paint over this. So I took a picture. (Keaton, if you are reading this: "It is not cute to color on the wall! Time out!"). I have a massive Keaton post in the works, so stay tuned for more on our middle child.

Who took this photo of his brother:

Branik finally won me over for good 2 days ago when he walked into the bathroom while I was doing my hair (shut up, it happens from time to time) and said, "Mommy, go car!"

"You want to go in the car, Branik?"

"Yes! To Tardit!"

I have never been so proud in my whole life. Ever.

Okay, back to the pies...

Okay fine. I will post something else. I have just enjoyed rolling around in the victory mud with Barack for the last 10 days (oh wait -- that doesn't sound right)...

What I meant was it warms my little Democratic heart to see his picture front and center when I log in. And to everyone who didn't vote for him:

"It's going to be okay."

For reals, y'all. For reals.

P.S. What's the deal with Uggs? I'll tell you what the deal is -- they are fugly as all get out. Maybe if I lived in Utah or Idaho I would feel differently...but then again, I'd still have eyes, so probably not.

Thrilled

It's a beautiful day in my neighborhood! (And I'm glad I booked my hotel in D.C. last year:)

My Very First 10K!

I did it! I have been saying forever that I was going to run in a real race, but I have been too chicken to do it because I am not a competitive person at all and I have this tremendous fear of failure. But I got a great workout buddy 3 months ago and she gave me the push I needed.

I had no idea what to expect (and spent the first half of my week throwing up) and Sarah had only run 5K's before, so we decided to set VERY conservative goals: to finish the race, to run the whole time, and not be last. We had no problems with any of our goals and both felt really great afterwards. In fact, we turned to each other after we crossed the finish line and said, "Oh. That wasn't bad at all!" We both felt like we could have gone faster, but we were scared to push it too hard because we didn't want to burn out before the finish line. It turns out spinning does wonders for endurance!

So thanks for the push Sarah! It was a blast and we are looking forward to our first half-marathon in spring -- aren't we Sarah:)

Halloween Schmalloween

Is everyone sick of Halloween pictures yet? Too bad. Here are ours. I'll try to make it short and sweet (hahahaha! That'll be the day!)

We carved pumpkins. I only took a picture of this one because I wasn't feeling well. We are dorks.


Keaton continued his tradition of wanting his Halloween costume to be the same thing that his birthday cake was in June of the same year. Last year he had a volcano cake, and then wanted to be a volcano for Halloween. It was especially awesome when he quit wearing the "lava hat" and everyone thought he was either an anthill or a Hershey's Kiss.

Anyway, this year he had a Harold the Helicopter cake, and was sure for months on end that he had to be Harold for Halloween.

So since I am still married to MacGuyver, I tasked my fabulous spouse with making Harold come to life. He didn't disappoint!

He designed and constructed the whole thing -- complete with internal reinforcements and a spinning rotor, and then I took over the painting.


It was quite the feat of cardboard engineering, and Keaton was ECSTATIC when he saw the finished product.

He was tired here, but I am posting it so you can see him from the side...

Keaton's costume was a ton of work, but luckily Rylan also decided to continue her tradition of "I want to be a princess/fairy/ballerina-princess-fairy for Halloween", so hers was easy. I think she just loves to be a girly girl and wear makeup, but whatever floats her boat is fine with me!

I couldn't get her to hold still long enough for a picture by herself, but here she is with Keaton/Harold:



Here they are with some of the neighbor kids. See Branik in the background dragging his blankie around? He almost wasn't anything for Halloween because he was such a little sicko all week, but he perked up at the last minute so we threw him into a costume that both Rylan and Keaton have worn (sorry, third child, thems the breaks!)

I still think he looked cute, but he would NOT part with his blankie. If we ever lose that thing we are dead meat. He only went to about 5 or 6 doors because he really wasn't feeling great, but he was content to be carried all over the freaking neighborhood by yours truly. My left bicep is still killing me. All of us were exhausted after 90 minutes -- Rylan's feet started hurting and SHE had to be carried between houses, I had Branik on my left hip the whole night, and Boone ended up with Harold in one arm while holding Keaton against his back with the other arm.

Good times, but I am glad it's only once a year. I'll predict right now that next October, we will be constructing a Toby costume, because we already know Keaton wants a Toby cake for his 5th birthday (if you have talked to Keaton in the last 6 months, you know this too). If I am right, you all owe me a thousand dollars. Totally fair and not at all manipulateable (not a real word) by me:)


See you next year!