Am I the only one that thinks maybe if I went to work my kids would like me a little more, or wanna hang out with me a little more? I know I said how Koen has been way into Phil lately. Well really it is both of my kids. Last week we went to dinner and they were both hanging all over him while I sat on my own side of the table alone. Now I didn't mind this, it was actually nice. This is the case most nights and days when Phil is off. Koen wants Phil to play with him, put him to bed, read with him. Brigs wants dad to get him out of the car, dad to carry him, dad's phone etc etc etc.
Like I said this is kind of nice because I do so many days completely on my own I am glad to have them spend some time with Phil when he is home. However last night when we got ready to go read with the boys in Koen's room Koen said "Mom did you see the door?" I was already inside his room and I told him I didn't and he said "look." Oh don't you worry it had two post its. One said "No Mom" and the other said "onle Dad." For some reason it totally hurt my feeling and I could not stop crying.
I feel like maybe if I went to work and was not with the kids all day long I would be much more loved and appreciated. I feel like Phil is God's gift to my children and I am chopped liver, so to speak. I often find it hard to be the disciplinary figure all day long (and most nights) but to also fill my role as the nurturer in the home. Mostly I just get sick of feeling like the old toy no one wants to play with. :( That sounds really sad. haha but seriously.
Seriously though I can only take so many "you are mean," "I dont want to see you again" "when is dad coming home," and "I want to call my dad" comments before I feel like a big not fun, not nice Mom.
13 comments:
Sorry about your boys... that would make me cry, too.
Sometimes I feel like I'd like to work, too. Taking care of kids and the house all day and night is draining. So, I hear ya! :)
I have some serious experience in this! :)
My oldest daughter , was so hard on me....when she was young....
"I like my friends mom better!"
"your not as pretty as....."
On and on like this everyday ...
When I was pregnant with number 3, I asked her what she wanted for her birthday...and she said "a new mom!"
I about died...I couldn't take it anymore...I cried and cried.
I knew she loved me...why didn't she know that she loved me?
Now she is 11...and the sweetest daughter EVER! She loves me more than ever...and shows it! It rocks!
My theory....some kids minds are to mature for their little bodies...and they don't know how to process their emotions...so it all gets dumped on us! The ones who love them unconditionally and serve them endlessly!
My younger sister had a daughter who was similiar. ... So I told her this...and sure enough she outgrew it!
Sorry for the long comment!
I just feel your pain!!! :)
Your a great mom with a beautiful family!
I have this same battle going on, except I do work, so I can tell you that in my case, being away from them hasn't made them miss me and want me like they do their dad.
I hope you can figure something out - it's no fun when your babies say hurtful things. :(
I hear ya loud and clear. Hang in there, soon you will be the in thing. On a side note you rocked the run today, you look amazing!!!
All kids do something like that...I know it hurts. It hurts my feelings every time my kids say something like that because they have no idea everything that I sacrifice for them.
Hang in there. ((hugs))
you are such a strong woman!! there is no job that is harder than being home all day w/ the kids. hang in there! they love, love, love you and will show it again soon!
Im sorry!! Those things do stab at your heart!! You are a great mama! I know it doesnt help to hear it probably but I seriously admire you and your strength!! Praying for a better week for ya!
I just wrote a comment, but wasn't logged in, so it erased it... DARN! I agree with 1 comment Alesha dearest, Phil is definitely one of God's gifts, but so are you! I hear that motherhood stuff is pretty difficult at times... I have a hard enough time getting my pup to follow directions, let alone an independent little human :) Hang in there Lesh... Love you!
Wow sounds like one little 5 year old needs a few more flicks...ha!!! Just teasing...It is hurtful, I have had my girls more than once say that they would like to live with one of my other cooler, nicer, prettier friends and it is a really awful feeling!!! You are a really nice mom...actually too nice maybe at times. You do a great job and are a good example to me! Love ya!
Hey. You are the vanilla ice cream. You change up the Sundee by putting on different toppings but the best always begins with vanilla ice cream.
No yummy Sundee eithout YOU
Sit back and enjoy the rest. You deserve it.
Love
Nana
When I was 8 months pregnant with Bentli Jared once said, "just think in 15 yrs she is going to hate you". He was of course just being his sarcastic self, but I seriously bawled my eyes out! I had no idea that it was not going to take 15 yrs, try 5! So hard to take sometimes! I try to let it slide off and just remember the times they are sweet to me. And is it bad to admit that when they are sick or hurt, a tiny part of me is happy that they are cuddling and loving me? Good luck-- hopefully, this stage will end soon!
Oh my goodness! I loved reading this post just because I have been saying the same thing for the past three months. Sometimes I think I would be a better mom if I worked. They would be happier only to see me a couple hours a day, and someone else could be the disciplinary figure all day.
Sorry for the late comment on this post Lesh but I haven't been in the blog world for months! I SERIOUSLY was wondering how my exact thoughts and feelings were a blog post on your blog...just change the names and you have my same problem! I so hear ya girl. I have referred to myself as chopped liver so often I've almost forgotten my real name. ;) Hang in there girl, you are not alone in this and they really do love you!
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