My video blog review for THE GHOST GALLEON! (Is there a ghost of a chance you'll watch it?)

From my YOUTUBE page

My video blog review of RETURN OF THE BLIND DEAD.

From my YOUTUBE page

In honor of Free Comic Book Day here is my review of... ROBOT NINJA!

From my YOUTUBE channel.

My video blog review for YELLOWBRICKROAD

From my YOUTUBE page

I just saw EVIL DEAD 2013... here are some thoughts.

from my YOUTUBE channel

Recommended Triple Feature: THE CALL OF CTHULHU, OUT OF MIND: THE STORIES OF H.P. LOVECRAFT and CTHULHU

Two short length features and one full length film, all dealing with the stories and world of H.P. Lovecraft. All three take unique approaches to invoke the spirit of Lovecraft’s work.

As per IMDB the plot for THE CALL OF CTHULHU (2005) “The Call of Cthulhu is HP Lovecraft's most famous story. It is the only story to feature the celebrated monster Cthulhu and in many ways it encapsulates the ideas that went on to permeated Lovecraft's Cthulhu Mythos. The film follows the story's three-part narrative construction, and it moves from the 1920s to 1908 to the1870s and back, as the story does. The story embodies HPL's nihilistic world view, his cosmic perspective, and his sense that mankind is doomed by its own insignificance.

In the story, a dying professor leaves his great-nephew a collection of documents pertaining to the Cthulhu Cult. The nephew begins to learn why the study of the cult so fascinated his grandfather. Bit-by-bit he begins piecing together the dread implications of his grandfather's inquiries, and soon he takes on investigating the Cthulhu cult as a crusade of his own. As he pieces together the dreadful and disturbing reality of the situation, his own sanity begins to crumble. In the end, he passes the torch to his psychiatrist, who in turn hears Cthulhu's call."

Here the the trailer for the film.

Thoughts: A true labor of love, produced by fans and starring fans. The movie is done in the style of a 1920's black and white silent film. This is a brilliant idea that works very well for what they're trying to do, by limiting themselves to the effects of the silent era they let the strength of the story carry things along. That being said the things they do to realize the world-spanning adventure are pretty damn clever, I wonder what these guys could do with a Michael Bay sized budget. A faithful and worth adaption, just don't watch it with friends that don't like 'reading a movie'.

As per IMDB the plot for OUT OF MIND: THE STORIES OF H.P. LOVECRAFT (1998) “Haunted by disturbing dreams from an inherited book, a young man becomes interested in the writings of H.P. Lovecraft.”

Here is the trailer for the film

Thoughts: A wonderful discovery, it may only be an hour long but it uses that time very efficiently. OUT OF MIND gives us a crash course in Lovecraft’s life and works and throws in a pastiche of his stories to boot. It may not have George Lucas style effects but it has great ideas and a lot of heart. The films portrayal of Lovecraft glosses over the more problematic aspects of his personality but that works just fine for what this production is trying to do. I don't know why but I find the idea of the old man from Providence wandering around in the world of dreams oddly heartwarming.

As per IMDB the plot for CTHULHU (2007) “A Seattle history professor, drawn back to his estranged family on the Oregon coast to execute his late mother's estate, is reacquainted with his best friend from childhood, with whom he has a long-awaited tryst. Caught in an accelerating series of events, he discovers aspects of his father's New Age cult which take on a dangerous and apocalyptic significance.”

Here is the trailer for the film.

Thoughts: An interesting adaption of Lovecraft’s classic story ‘THE SHADOW OUT OF INNSMOUTH’ and in my opinion it is superior to DAGON (not that DAGON isn’t entertaining in its own way also). CTHULHU takes ‘THE SHADOW OF INNSMOUTH’ and changes it from the story of a man wandering into danger to a coming home story. The protagonist is a gay man and the story of his love interest is believable and heartfelt. I like that the relationship of Russel and Mike has all the beats of a standard horror movie couple’s relationship. Russel’s relationship with his father is just as complicated and believable, sure his father is the leader of a cult of starry wisdom but 75% of their relationship could be that of any other father and son. That being said what we came for here is the Lovecraftian horror and we get it in spades. While the movie is called CTHULHU we never see the big guy in the film, but we do feel his presence as the apocalypse taking place in the background of the protagonists story slowly comes to the forefront. There are many disturbing and frightening scenes in the film thanks to the director's wise decision to hint at things rather than show them. The scene where the protagonist has to make his way through the tunnels beneath the city using only a flash camera for illumination is particularly harrowing.

Recommended Double Feature: COUNT DRACULA (1977) and FRANKENSTEIN : THE TRUE STORY (1973)

Two great mini-series adaptions of classic monster stories, two examples of 70's made for TV madness, They take liberties with the source text (as most adaptions of Frankenstein and Dracula do) but are still highly entertaining. Both feature memorable and distinctive takes the iconic monsters, some amazing moments of gore for TV movies and some pretty sexy moments as well.



As per IMDB the plot of COUNT DRACULA (1977)“For those familiar with Bram Stoker's novel, this adaptation follows the book quite closely in most respects. Jonathan Harker visits the Count in Transylvania to help him with preparations to move to England. Harker becomes Dracula's prisoner and discovers Dracula's true nature. After Dracula makes his way to England, Harker becomes involved in an effort to track down and destroy the Count, eventually chasing the vampire back to his castle.”



There is no trailer so here is a scene from the film.

Thoughts: A long time favorite, when I first saw it at 10 years old it blew my mind. The entire cast is terrific. Louis Jordan does a fantastic job as Dracula, he's as charming as he is evil, the gentleman of the Bela Lugosi combined with the savagery of Christopher Lee. I think his is one of the best takes on the character. Let’s not forget Frank Finlay’s performance as Van Helsing; brave, wise and maybe just a little bit crazy. His is probably my second favorite Van Helsing of all time but only because no one can ever top Peter Cushing. Everyone else involved with the production does a great job as well. The films use of video effects to be arty sometimes fall flat but one the other hand there are moments of bloodshed that will scare and disturb.



And as for Dracula’s three sexy brides. Well, my 10 year old self might not have sold his soul for a chance to be their vampire lord but he might have looked over the price list.



As per IMDB the plot for FRANKENSTEIN : THE TRUE STORY: “A more psychological telling of the Mary Shelley story has a different kind of monster...”


Here is the trailer for the film.

Thoughts: Now if COUNT DRACULA took liberties with the source material, FRANKENSTEIN : THE TRUE STORY throws most of the book out the window. The movie lifts elements from just about every aspect of the monsters cinematic history and rearranges them as it sees fit. You get glimpses of the James Whale’s classic, the Hammer films and the Bride of Frankenstein. In this version of the story the monster starts out as a very handsome man and slowly deteriorates over time. Like all the best versions of the story the creature is an innocent but Victor’s rejection makes him into a monster. In doing so this gives the whole affair a very original spin. The side plot concerning Dr. Polidori’s creation of Prima only adds to the story of science mad science and betrayal. The entire cast is excellent, James Mason’s Dr. Polidori is wonderfully loathsome, over the years I have come to appreciate Michael Sarrazin performance as the monster more and more and despite the fact he brings much of the ensuing misery on himself you can’t help but feel sorry for Leonard Whiting’s Dr. Frankenstein.

Once again, for a TV movie, this production is surprisingly violent and sexy. You can’t take your eyes off Jane Seymour as the sexy and evil Prima and the scene where she meets her final end is particularly gruesome.


When I first saw this at age eight I thought the title meant that the Frankenstein monster had really existed. It really changed my worldview for a while...







My barely coherent review for THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE aka Dieter Laser is the creepiest motherfucker on the planet.

This movie.

This fucking movie.

Wow.

I just got done watching it on VOD and wanted to get my ideas down on virtual paper as soon as a could. I need to get to work tomorrow but I don 't know if I'll be able to sleep truth be told.

So about the movie. The movie as you may or may not know is about a pair of tourists that are taken prisoner by a mad scientist that wants to graft them mouth to anus to form a human centipede. This is some grotesque stuff here and it is realized in scenes that are the grandest of the Grand-Guinol. There are scenes in this film that will make your skin crawl.

But for me that isn't enough to interest me in a film. The HOSTEL/SAW series of films never held much interest for me, (I did find INSIDE and MARTYRS to be very effective and involving films however.).

One thing held me riveted for the length of the film: Dieter Laser.

This man is like something like the result of gene splicing Klaus Kinski, Christopher Walken and Udo Kier. He makes this film, every second of this film without him this movie would have been a grotesque and involving oddity like BLOODSUCKING FREAKS or CANNIBAL FEROX.

See the movie for this man alone, the body horror takes a back seat to him.

But that being said, the final images of the film is one of the most bleak and haunting things I have ever seen.

That is my opinion and my opinions can be a little strange- for example I never cared for THE GOONIES, BUCKAROO BANZAI or GHOSTBUSTERS but I watch PHANTASM every year for my birthday because I love it so much and consider the Lugosi-Karloff film THE BLACK CAT to be one of the best horror films of all time.

And we will now close out this post with the trailer for THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE.

Actually instead lets ask Dante and Randall how they feel about the film...

(Greatest Movie Review Ever? Maybe) Mad Mad Mad Mad Movies: Bay of Blood (1971): Or How I Learned To Stay Out Of The Real Estate Market

Mad Mad Mad Mad Movies: Bay of Blood (1971): Or How I Learned To Stay Out Of The Real Estate Market: "Cease your blubbering as Bava's genius washes over you, much like Jesus jumping out from behind a bush to scare you during your morning jog. Only this Jesus has a last name of Sanchez and is dressed only in a fertilizer sack, his turgid member tenting the front as he screams incoherent Spanish obscenities at you. You turn to run but trip over your iPod Shuffle's headphone cord, a moan escaping your lips as Jesus mounts you and begins to thrust in time to the tinny sounds of 'Come On Eileen' issuing from your device lying nearby in the grass."

Yes that bit of genius is actually part of the review.

And yes I did laugh so hard I got a nosebleed.

Long Live The Duke Of DVD!

Video Blog Review II: THEY CALL ME MACHO WOMAN

If these things keep expanding to longer than ten minutes I may have to break down and get a YouTube account.

Which would mean ANOTHER password and login to remember.

Still though, let me know what what you think of my rambling half-assed observations.

Part One


Part Two


Part Three


Part Four




Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know? Y'know?

Sigh

I really need to rehearse these things...

Video Blog Review: POINT OF TERROR

Let me know if this is a feature you would like to continue...

Uncle Al's Halloween Hoedown Part One- In Which I Confess My Love Of Straw Fedoras and Flying Balls

Up until Halloween I want to try and watch one episode of a horror TV series and one movie as often as I can and then share my feelings about what I have seen. It could be fun and besides it's cheaper than therapy.

We begin with the gold standard of horror telemovies- 1972's THE NIGHT STALKER. Don't let the 'Made For TV' thing turn you off kids- this is better than some of the movies out in the theaters now. THE NIGHT STALKER stars Darren McGavin as a Las Vegas crime reporter that blunders onto the case of what could be a real live vampire prowling the streets. I first saw this when I was 5 years old, my Grandma Vi was a big one for letting me watch age-inappropriate material on purpose as opposed to my parents letting me watch age-inappropriate material by accident.

Really- they thought the drive in sign advertising a showing of FLESH GORDON was a misprint.

And they wonder how I got the way I am.

But that's not what we are here to talk about, we're here to talk about how awesome THE NIGHT STALKER is. The directing and music are terrific, the entire cast is engaging- especially that Carol Lynley RAWR! Richard Matheson’s script is clever, scary, funny and surprisingly hard boiled. The soundtrack is iconic- just play a few seconds and most horror fans will recognize it. But none of that is really what makes this film the classic it is.

Darren McGavin is what makes this film, his performance is the perfect, we meet a Carl Kolchak that is bitter, intrepid, smug and as forever walking the line between brave and foolhardy.

As the story progresses we are never bored as we see detective work, verbal sparring of the highest order and the occasional glimpse of Darren McGavin shirtless! (I will never in a million years be as manly.)While there is a fantastic knock down drag out battle between the Vampire and the Las Vegas police we don't get a good look at the monster's face until the ending. And what an ending! I rank it right up there with the ending of 'HORROR OF DRACULA' as one of my top monster kid memories

I can't say enough good things about this one. You should see it if you haven't. If you have seen it you should see it again.

And now PHANTASM – my favorite horror film.

That's right, I said it and if loving a bittersweet coming of age story where the local slackers and an ice cream man face off against a trans-gendered mortician from beyond reality with an undocumented midget zombie labor scheme that has random references to Frank Herbert's novel DUNE is wrong than I don't want to be right.

PHANTASM was released in 1979 but I didn't see it until much later. Odd I know but there was something about the commercials for that movie that made me a little nervous about it. You know the ones where the kid is on his bed and the midget zombies start clawing at him. It is too bad really because one of the girls in my 8^th grade English class asked me if I wanted to go see it with her and I chickened out because, well because I was kind of afraid of girls when I was in 8th grade. In later years I would just be afraid of everyone.

Once the age of the VCR came along and I became old enough to rent R rated flicks, and then worked up the nerve to rent R rated flicks from the judgmental looking woman at the local video store I finally saw the movie and was just blown away by it. Maybe because I was finally ready for it- after all by the time I was 18 I had devoted myself to the works of HP Lovecraft, Clive Barker and Stephen King and I was ready for a wild story that wasn't quite a slasher film, wasn't quite a monster movie and wasn't quite an Afterschool Special with nudity.

(Which would have been the greatest Afterschool Special EVER!)

The cast is all top notch, Jody, Mike and Reggie all seem like real people that you wouldn't mind hanging out with. Of course these days 12 year old Mike would have been scooped up by social services because he had a guardian that let him drive, gave him access to firearms, alchohol and left him in the charge of hot chicks for hours at a time.

The world has a changed folks.

And no review of PHANTASM would be complete without a shout out to Angus Scrimm's portrayal of the villainous Tall Man. He is quite simply one of my favorite horror movie baddies ever, right up there with the Universal Mummy and Hammer's Dr. Frankenstein. I showed my college girlfriend three horror films- HELLRAISER, DEAD RINGERS, and PHANTASM. The first two grossed her out and made her squirm in her seat- the Tall Man gave her nightmares and God Bless him for it. The Tall Man is menacing, powerful, unkillable, and has command of an army of killer dwarves and silver spheres. Also the Tall Man apparently enjoys spending his free time morphed into the body of a woman, hanging around in bars and picking up guys.

I don't think Jigsaw is ever gonna top that.

So there you have it, my favorite horror film. I watch it every year for my birthday. Sometimes I watch the film and I am a little appalled at how much it has influences my fiction.

Sometimes I'm just appalled by my fiction.

I recommend both movies as essential Halloween viewing.

INSIDE (2007)

Well that was intense... in fact it was almost a little too intense for me...

Wow. Did I really say that? I must getting old.


I ended up seeing Alfred Hitchcock's Psycho at a young age (on PBS of all places!) and that put me in a place where stories about rampaging nutcases wielding sharp things don't usually do much for me. Oh there will always be exceptions to the rule like Silence of the Lambs, the original Halloween, Curtains and Audition but most of the time I could care less what Leatherface and Jason are up to.

And just to show you how much of a hypocrite I am my favorite horror film is still Phantasm and the Tall Man has plenty of stabby moments in that film to say the least. (And don't get me started on those balls of his!)

So I guess if your garden variety slasher reveals he did it all because he was possessed by the spirit of Cthulhu's sweatsock I might be more interested but otherwise give me the weird stuff, give me The Masque of the Red Death instead of The Fall of the House of Usher.

So what does Inside have to do with all this?

Inside is the story of a pregnant woman alone on Christmas eve finding herself stalked by a madwoman determined to take the baby from her. And did I mention said madwoman is carrying scissors?

Well I have heard a lot about the movie over the last year or so but I can't say I was in a rush to see it. Luck and a rare bit of free time gave me a chance to watch the film and let me just say that, if you have the stomach for it, this is one HELL of a movie. I literally squirmed in my seat- remember that intense, mad and stomach-turning final 20 minutes of Takashi Miike's Audition?

Well Inside is like that for over an hour.

The performances from the two lead actresses will keep you riveted, Béatrice Dalle especially. She creates an antagonist as pathetic as she is terrifying. If I have one complaint about the film, I think it could have gone with out one less set piece. They almost overdo it.

But the images, and questions, this film leaves you with will stay with you a while.

Inside is a keeper... I just don't know how long it will be before I have the nerve to watch it again.

And... in a final creepy postscript... doesn't the film's villainess Béatrice Dalle look a little like the Octomom?





Brrrrrrrr

I Can't Belive It's Not Lovecraft!

The following post was inspired by the dastardly
Darcknyt!

The conventional wisdom is that there are no good Lovecraft
movies and that the best movies with Lovecraft in the title
don't have a darn thing to do with the man from Providence.
Well you have a point there, mostly.

BUT there are a few wonderful little films you might not
have heard of. I'd like to share them with you, and while they
might not all be strictly Lovecraft they sure as Hell feel like a
Lovecraftian story

Well lets start with this one...

Cthulhu

Now I haven't actually seen this one yet... BUT IS FINALLY
COMING OUT ON DVD! I have waited years to see it. It
looks like a great version of The Shadow Out Of
Innsmouth

The Resurrected

This is a fantastic adaption of The Case Of Charles
Dexter Ward. Again they made changes to the story
but the plot and mystery are still there and some very tense
moments near the end.


Marebito

Ok this is an off the wall choice and not related to any actual
Lovecraft story but the spirit is there. We have an unreliable
narrator and a story that ponders if the Mountains of
Madness are under the streets of Japan. This one got mixed
reviews but I find it fascinating viewing.


Strange Aeons:The Thing On The
Doorstep

This is a low budget independent film adaption of The
Thing On The Doorstep. They may not have had a lot
of cash but they have more style and spirit than a dozen
current horror remakes. Yes liberties are taken but this is
gem of a film and Angela M. Grillo is a delight as Asenath
Waite. This is available from Lurker Films. I
only wish I more disposable income to give these guys.


Out of Mind: The Stories of HP Lovecaft
Sorry no trailer for this one but this is a a special that was
done for the Canadian BRAVO channel. It is part pastiche
and part introductory to Lovecraft. Incorporates actual
quotes from Lovectaft's letters and stories as dialogue. This
is also available from Lurker Films.


The Creeping Flesh

Ok I admit this isn't even close to being a Lovecraft adaption
but there is just something about it...


The Call of Cthulhu

This is just neat. The folks of the H.P. Lovecraft Historical Society created an adaption of the story in the style of a 1920's silent film. Very faithful to the source and very entertaining. Another movie worthy of a special order.


I hope this gives you folks some ideas what to get next time you want to see a movie

Let The Right Updates In

A few more notes on the LET THE RIGHT ONE IN subtitle controversy...

I found out via
THE VAULT OF HORROR and BLOODY DISGUSTING (both great sites for horror fans BTW)

Anyway apparently Magnolia Pictures has responded to the outcry with this...

“We’ve been made aware that there are several fans that don’t like the version of the subtitles on the DVD/BR. We had an alternate translation that we went with. Obviously a lot of fans thought we should have stuck with the original theatrical version. We are listening to the fans feedback, and going forward we will be manufacturing the discs with the subtitles from the theatrical version...

...There are no exchanges. We are going to make an alternate version available however. For those that wish to purchase a version with the theatrical subtitles, it will be called out in the tech specs box at the back/bottom of the package where it will list SUBTITLES: ENGLISH (Theatrical), SPANISH.”

Well that's better than nothing I suppose but I feel bad for the folks that already paid for the sub par version.

I wonder when the restored versions hit the stores.

Again thanks to BLOODY DISGUSTING, ICONS OF FRIGHT and THE VAULT OF HORROR for keeping me informed of this issue.

I guess the Internet is good for more than porn after all...

Crushing Disappointment News!: Well it looks like I won't be getting the DVD release of LET THE RIGHT ONE IN anytime soon after all

Ok color me heartbroken here but apparently the mouth breathing halfwits of Magnolia Pictures pulled the original subtitles and substituted some absolutely half-assed ones that hurt the experience of the film.

I want to thank the website ICONS OF FRIGHT for catching this before I parted with my hard earned cash. Seriously folks take a look at the screen caps on the page above and see that appallingly bad job that was done by this new 'translators'.

This is the most disappointing news I've had in a while. Why do horror films always get interfered with this way?

Once again the link to the screencaps and article is here.

I plan to add ICONS OF FRIGHT to my regular stops on the internet.

Forgive Me If I Go Out On A Limb Here...

Now here is an idea for a Helluva Double Feature!

Ah if only my parents had been millionaires that had died young. I would either have been a costumed crime fighter or opened my own movie theater to show movies that I thought were worth seeing - the classics, the obscure and the new and interesting would all have a home there.

And every Saturday night there would be a double feature. Here is one of the ones I think would be great...

PLANET TERROR and THE MACHINE GIRL






Here are two stories of women that turn from victims to agents of destruction, here are two stories set in worlds where the laws and physics, physiology and rational behavior have no power. These are films that titillate and mutilate. They are the the direct decedents of Sam Rami's Xena and Evil Dead series Both oddly enough feature heroines that are maimed and then weaponized. The villains in Planet Terror are zombies and slowly mutating soldiers. The villains in The Machine Girl are ninjas and mobsters prone to wearing drill bras. These are some real crowd pleasers with delirious action and some moments of humor that are as odd as they are charming. These are the perfect movies to watch with some friends, so long as it isn't your local church group. (then again...)

If you haven't seen either of these flicks yet, they're both out on DVD. Give them a try.

Let The Right One In (Låt den rätte komma in) Out On DVD today

OK here is a link to start us out...

http://www.lettherightoneinmovie.com/

And here is the trailer



And lastly here is my previous review

http://albruno3.blogspot.com/2009/01/let-right-one-in-lt-den-rtte-komma-in.html

I have spoken at length about this film and I can't recommend it and buying/renting it enough. If you like any of my strange weird tales I have here and on my web page then you are going to love this film. This film (and the book) tells the kind of story I have been trying to tell most of my life and does so beautifully and subtly.

See it as soon as you can folks.

(I would also recommend a triple feature of this film, DONNIE DARKO and BETTER OFF DEAD if you want to understand the teenage years of Al Bruno III)

Thanks again for listening.

Yet Another Quick Glance At My DVD Collection

THE LAND OF THE LOST: THE FIRST SEASON (1974)

Plot;
Marshall, Will, and Holly on a routine expedition
Met the greatest earthquake ever known.
High on the rapids it struck their tiny raft,
And plunged them down a thousand feet below.
To the Land of the Lost


This is one of the treasures from my childhood. This show had everything, comedy, dinosaurs, the scary troll-like Sleestacks, time travel and of course Chaka. The best part about this show for me was watching the strange mythology build up as the series progressed, we learned about how the Altrusian's devolved into the Sleestacks, about how the Pylons effected the environment. In a lot of ways she show primed me for my love of the weird tales of Robert E. Howard and HP Lovecraft.


Another great thing about the first season is that it wraps up the entire storyline in a nice little time loop. Sure there were two more seasons after this but honestly they didn't do much for me then and still do nothing for me now. I also caught the remake series from the 1990's but that didn't really hold my attention either and they had a savage jungle girl in it! Ordinarily I love savage jungle girls.


Now of course they're going to try and this into a movie starring Will Farrel. I remain cautious but interested but I am not sure they could ever recapture the old show's strange magic.


I'm sure the over 40 nerds out there already have their own feelings about the series but I would like to say to all you youngsters out there with your iPods and your Xboxes that if you can look past the thirty year old production values and pacing you might really enjoy watching this.




DOUBLE FEATURE RECOMMENDATION;


OLDBOY (2003) and SWEENEY TODD (2008)
PLOTS: Both are stories of men destroyed by vengeance


OLDBOY is the story of a man dragged off the street and held captive for over a decade in a strange private prison. He doesn't know why this was done, he doesn't know who is responsible but his time as a prisoner costs him his wife, his daughter and his sanity. When he is freed he goes on a quest for revenge but he only has 5 days to learn the truth.


SWEENEY TODD is set in the Victorian era and is the story of a man arrested and exiled for a crime he did not commit. Over a decade later he manages to make his way back home to try and find his loved ones again. What he finds sets him on a path that leads to bloody retribution and some very snappy musical numbers.


Both films are very violent and bleak and yet are punctuated with scenes of sweetness and desperation. OLDBOY in particular lurches from gore to pathos at speeds that might induce whiplash on unprepared filmgoers. SWEENEY TODD keeps the same atmosphere all the way through but the films juxtaposition of tropes from the standard Broadway musical and the long lost art of Grand Guignol theater make for enthralling viewing.


Watching both films back to back makes for a fascinating comparison of similar plotlines seen through different cultural and directorial styles.

A quick glance at some of my DVD collection...

Please feel free to view these as recommendations or cautionary tales... your mileage varies...


PHANTASM (1979)
Plot: Something sinister is happening to the bodies buried at Morningside cemetery, 12 year old Mike Pearson and his pals decide to investigate.

Ok I’m just gonna put it out there. This is my favorite movie. It’s is as heartfelt as it is surreal, its a coming of age story and a tale of cosmic horror. How can you not love a movie that has transgendered morphing alien morticians, killer dwarves, fingers turning into bugs, brief nudity, random scenes lifted from the novel Dune and an ass kicking hippy ice cream man? I watch this one at least once a year, usually when I’m down in the dumps or on my birthday. Actually at 41 I am usually down the in the dumps on my birthday.



JACK AND THE BEANSTALK (1974)
Plot: Oh come on!

This is one of my favorite animated films. Some 30 years after seeing it I still catch myself humming the songs to myself and I like the slight changes made to the classic fairy tale. In this version of the story the giant is the henpecked son of a nasty witch named Heccuba and the pair of them have taken control of the castle for the kingdom of the sky. There are some scary moments, some funny moments and some moments that are just so goddamn strange I don’t think you’d ever see them in a modern film. This along with The Mouse and His Child are the kind of movies they just don’t make any more.




POINT OF TERROR (1971)
Plot: 40 something singer screws his way to the top.

Now I have discussed this film in the Potentiality section of the board but I am going to talk about it here as well because more people need to see this movie. It ranks right of there in that strange TROLL 2 realm where the movie is so awful that it becomes endlessly fascinating.

This film was in a box set called THE HORRIBLE HORRORS COLLECTION but it isn’t a horror film- it’s the plot of SHOWGIRLS but starring Greg Brady and Ilsa She Wolf of The SS.

See the musical stylings of protagonist Tony Trelos rock out the Lobster House lounge!

Marvel at the tale of a man whose ambition leads him to sleep his way to the top!

Cringe at the sight of star Peter Carpenter bare butt!

Pick your jaw up off the floor after watching a twist ending that would leave M. Night Shyamalan weeping tears of blood!

When I saw this film I was sick with the flu, shuddering and near to retching with fever. I put a movie in the DVD player to try and distract myself. My stunned disbelief at what i was seeing soon became tears of laughter. This film may have saved my life.

And thanks to the wonders of Youtube, here is a taste of the film… it only gets more insane from here…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jsUFBEnW1nc