Half Girlfriend

During our Engineering college hostel days we had a senior. We used to call him “Arvind da” (Name changed). He was very friendly and decent. He used to roam around with a girl of his same batch from different branch. She was Pooja(Name changed). They would enjoy their evening stroll in the campus, spent time together in the canteen, go movies together, only two of them. The beautiful lady also frequently visited him in our hostel. He stayed in a single room. They would spend good amount of time in the hostel on the weekends, and then went out by the college bus. For us they were ideal couples. They looked alike, both had the kind of charm, they always had smile on their face. Those were pre internet and pre mobile phone days. We also didn’t have a landline phone at our hostel, it showed up much later. But our Girls hostel had one from the beginning. If the boys had to communicate with their girlfriends or friends they had to either give a visit or go to the telephone booth about a km away. But during the ragging days there was also another option. The seniors would write letters, yes, hand-written letters, and would ask some decent first semester guy to deliver it.

So, one day I met Pooja in the city. We both hello-ed. I asked if she's with Arvind da. She smiled. Aha, I remember her smile, so delightful. She said she's alone, some shopping stuffs. Later in the evening I and one more friend were with Arvind da, in his room. We were simply gossiping, smoking. 

"Today, I met you girlfriend near Pan Bazar, " I said.

"Girlfriend? I don’t have any girlfriend."

"Come on Arvind da," the words came out from me and my friend’s mouth simultaneously.

"Are you talking about Pooja ?" Asked Arvind da.

"Ofcourse yes, or who else?"

Arvind da laughed, "Pooja is not my girlfriend."

The discussion continued for some more time. Arvind da was close to us. He tried to explain his relationship with Pooja. But we were not convinced.

"So you mean to say Pooja is only your friend and not girlfriend?" I asked.

Arvind da remained silent for a while. And then he said, "It’s much more than friendship I must acknowledge. But then she’s not my girlfriend. It is somewhere in between."

We were totally confused.

"Are you guys into some kind of physical relationship?" My friend asked.

Arvind da tried to bring his charming smile on his face, but it was fake. 

"No yaar, nothing like that."

"Not the hard core type, but kissing and may be some other soft stuffs?"

Arvind da again laughed and denied. I think he was upset with the question. He was a very emotional and simple guy.

"Forget it. You will not understand our relationship. It’s very complicated," he commented, smile on his face.

Even though we were not matured enough to understand such relationships, but we didn’t bother our senior friend anymore since then. A couple of years later it was time for Arvind da's batch to move out of hostel. We still had another two years. It was time to depart. Arvind da passed us a small diary. We were supposed to write our address/contact number/email address (Yes, suddenly internet cafes became a booming business those days). I noticed many of the guys mentioned some goodbye quotes on the diary. I was confused. It’s pretty easy to say Hello and get introduced for the first time, but farewell quotes are difficult. I didn’t know what to write? And then something came to my mind and I penned it down, fast.

Arvind da laughed. It seemed he liked my goodbye message.

Actually such relationships has had always existed. Some relationship better remain unnamed, unrecognized. Chetan Bhagat tried to give it a name. Like many others, even I didn’t like the idea. I think for some people "Half Boyfriend" name would have been more convincing name than "Half Girlfriend", or does it anyway matter? My wife picked up the book from a store long back. Even though I’m not a big fan of Chetan Bhagat but I read the book. I felt an emotional relationship is not presented in a mature way. But the book is a best seller. The novel is made into a movie as well. I don’t have any plan to watch it though, but "Half Girlfriend" made more than ten crores on its opening day. Not half bad, isn’t it?

Grab a copy of my debut book Story of Tublu from Amazon or Flipkart. It is a Contemporary Fiction novel, published by LiFi Publications Pvt Ltd. The book has its share of drama, that entertains; humor, that makes one reminisce; love, friendship and emotions that defines the amazing journey that is, life.

Tum Bin

Watching movies during our Engineering hostel days was fun. Those were the days when laptops we made only for the CEO kind of people, and mobile phone users felt proud to carry one. Quite rarely though, but when any handset started to ring in any public place, owners didn’t accept the call immediately. They would take the phone in hand, had a closer look at the B&W screen, still ringing. Only after nearby people got to know that the particular person is having a mobile phone, the call was answered.

Our college was located at the outskirts of Guwahati city, and our hostel was at the extreme end of the campus, surrounded by hills. There was a time when only a single computer was there in the entire hostel, and unfortunately it was in my room. Initially, we used to bring movie CD's on rent from some of the video parlors in the city. They charged heavily for 24 hours, and any delay in returning was again a pain in the ass. Almost everyone loved to watch movies, but there were only a few who usually took initiative to bring the CD's, counted how many guys watched the movie, calculated the share accordingly, collected the money from everyone, and returned the stuffs.

The following semester many more desktops arrived in the hostel, similarly in all the other hostels of our college. Soon, latest Bollywood/Hollywood movies, along with the other category of movies which were on high demand, were available in the campus itself. Watching movies became easier and cheaper. But there were also issues with those pirated CD's. Apart from the low picture quality, there was also a much bigger problem. While watching, all of a sudden the computer got hung. We tried many options, but most of the time a restart was the only solution. Sometimes in a single movie session we had to restart multiple times. Guys usually avoided CD's with scratches on it, but sometimes even handsome looking CD/DVD was also capable enough in hanging the computer. 

'Would you like to watch “Tum Bin” movie?  My friend Rajat asked.

'Tum Bin? Is it a new movie? Never heard of it,' I answered.

'It’s a latest one. I’ve heard it’s a very good movie. If you want I can bring it, we can watch on your computer,' Rajat suggested.

I was a bit confused. Even though Rajat watched many movies with us, but it was for the first time he was taking an initiative. I said, ‘okay, let’s inform our buddies, we will watch together.'

Unlike him, he was a bit reluctant to watch it together with other friends. 'Too much crowd also spoils the fun. Everyone keep talking, we cannot concentrate properly.'

'But then our individual contribution would be pretty high in that case.'

Rajat smiled, 'That’s okay. You need not pay. Anyway, we will watch on your PC only.'

My confusion started to create ripples of suspicion in my mind. "How come Rajat is so much interested in the movie. He’s willing to bring the CD and also want to pay for it, alone."

So, in the same afternoon Rajat brought the CD. We watched "Tum Bin" together, only two of us. Even my room-mate, Nair, wasn’t present, he was not in room that afternoon. 

'It’s an okay kind of movie, not that great. What’s so special about it that you were so much interested?' I asked out of suspicion. 

Rajat smiled. 'I don’t know, but some of my friends said it’s a very good movie.'

Later in the night, I shared the experience with Nair. Both Rajat and Nair were from Mechanical branch. After listening to my words, Nair couldn’t stop laughing. He then told me the real reason behind Rajat’s interest in "Tum Bin".

"Tum Bin movie starred Priyanshu Chatterjee. He’s the main hero in the movie. Priyanshu made his Bollywood debut with Tum Bin in 2001. Some guys from the Mechanical batch already watched the movie. They said the new actor looked very similar to Rajat. The entire classroom started to tease him, called him Priyanshu. Rajat was very happy, particularly when few girls also joined the party."

We then went to Rajat's room with few more guys, pulled his legs for the next two-three hours.

Grab a copy of my debut book Story of Tublu from Amazon or Flipkart. It is a Contemporary Fiction novel, published by LiFi Publications Pvt Ltd. The book has its share of drama, that entertains; humor, that makes one reminisce; love, friendship and emotions that defines the amazing journey that is, life.

Last Khep

The evening times were more fun during our hostel days. As it started to get dark everyone came out of their room one after another, went downstairs to the nearby dhaba, popularly known as Honu/Manoj dhaba. Some of the popular evening snacks those days were Singara Bhujia; well, it’s nothing but mashed somosa shallow-fried with chopped onions, green chilies, egg and finally decorated with chopped coriander leaves. Some of the other popular snacks were Maggi, paratha-sabji, bun-omelet, boiled egg, single fry, double fry and a few more.

After the sumptuous snacks, guys used to buy cigarettes from Honu/Sahabuddin’s shop. Snacks, cigarettes and everything else was always on credit for most of us. After returning to the hostel guys usually used to relax at the staircase. Someone would light a cigarette and then immediately someone else would request "my first khep, okay", then another would say "my second khep", "third khep". Khep is an informal term which is frequently being used among the buddies from our place. Even though the term is applicable in different situations, the meaning is more or less the same. In this case you must have already understood that the burning cigarette should first go the guy who said "First khep" from the original hand, then it should pass to the second and then to the third khep guy. The booking was usually up to third khep, and after that someone would usually  say "okay, my last khep". Last khep is actually interesting, it sounds more decent and also with the guarantee that you are going to have that last puff.

As I said the term khep can be used in some other situations as well. For example if a guy is trying on a girl, his friends wouldn't hesitate to comment "asshole is trying a khep".

Friends who try the khep thing pretty often are tagged as 'Kheparu'. We all have experienced Kheparu friends at some point of life. I remember we had some hostel buddies who were not regular smokers but were always the first ones to say "first khep" or a "last khep". 

Those were the days when the joy of friendship simply blossomed around the campus. The long meaningless gossips, the cigarette sharing, the late night teas and what not? Wishing all my friends a very Happy Friendship Day.



Grab a copy of my debut book Story of Tublu from Amazon or Flipkart. It is a Contemporary Fiction novel, published by LiFi Publications Pvt Ltd. The book has its share of drama, that entertains; humor, that makes one reminisce; love, friendship and emotions that defines the amazing journey that is, life. 

For The Sake of Humanity

life was different then; loud music escaped from almost every room, guys desperately looked for a matchbox late in the night, holding cigarettes in their hands; those blistering laughter and the frequent booze. If one would take a stroll around the hostel in the evening, he could have possibly got a taste of all form of music including folks songs, Bollywood numbers, modern/classic Regional songs, Pop, Rock and Metal music amongst others. There were quite a few Metal freaks including my room-mate, Nair. We worshiped Metal songs regularly those days. Well, this is the kind of music which can be enjoyed best at a little roaring sound. Our room had two big speakers attached to our music system.

We had a senior named Houkib. I hope I've spelled the name correctly. Houkib was from Manipur and he was a true Christian. He was a guy of cool temperament and during our stay in hostel we had never witnessed a moment when Houkib drifted away from his coolness. Quite often he was occupied in his room reading or singing Gospel songs together with his friends. His room was a couple of rooms away from ours. Houkib was among the guys who sleep early and wake up early. After dinner, it happened quite a few times that I and Nair were inside our room, enjoying some metal songs, relaxing. Houkib would enter with his usual smile, but also with a little bit of discomfort on his face, this time. I and Nair were little curious as he wasn’t a frequent visitor. Houkib would stand near the music system, pick a few audio cassettes one after another and had a close look at them. After a few moments he would reduce the volume, smile and say "For the sake of humanity!"



Grab a copy of my debut book Story of Tublu from Amazon or Flipkart. It is a Contemporary Fiction novel, published by LiFi Publications Pvt Ltd. The book has its share of drama, that entertains; humor, that makes one reminisce; love, friendship and emotions that defines the amazing journey that is, life.

Tin Fish

During our college days, the hostel was more than a home for us and we were pretty much addicted to the place. I loved to remain in the hostel, doing nothing. Life was so cool, the place created happiness and serenity. Now what to say about our hostel food? I think it’s more or less the same story everywhere. But no matter how the food was, everyone used to eat gracefully. Every year our hostel warden kept changing and they all preferred to visit only in freshers and farewell nights. Also, they usually showed up when most of the guys were in their normal state of mind, before the party got wild. Many of the hostelers were confused to see a stranger in the hostel premises and after knowing he was our Super Sir, the guys simply disappeared. Everything related to our hostel including our canteen, was managed by us, the hostelers. Every month the guys used to choose a new mess secretory and the entire responsibility of the mess was with him. The best thing about our hostel mess was that it was more like a home. Many were not satisfied with the regular food and desired for something extra.  The canteen guys were aware of such demands and they always used to keep boiled potatoes, raw onions and green chilies. Such luxuries were usually limited to the seniors. I remember a few such seniors who always used to yell at the canteen guys, 'bring boiled potato, fast', 'fry the boiled potato with onion and green chilies, and get it fast'

Boiled potatoes were in great demand and it lasted only for a limited time. Whosoever wanted to worship boiled potato, had to eat early. After the boiled potatoes were finished, guys used to ask for fried green chilies and onions. When the onions also got over, the chilies became highly demanding. My good friend Bhushan liked the 'Onion-Chili' fry to such an extent that when he was our mess secretary he introduced the recipe as part of the main course. Well, it took many of us by surprise when we had to finish our meal with dal and onion-chili fry. Apart from those yummy extra eateries, we also had the luxury to prepare some customized special food like chicken, egg amongst others. Sometimes a group of guys used to contribute money for their special meal. Usually one of the hostel cooks prepared the delicious cuisine, but some of the guys had a chef in them and they participated enthusiastically. Such exclusive meals were usually relished a little early or a little late from the usual mess timing, just to avoid the public assault on the food. 

Gradually I also became habituated to such exclusive meals. That was the time when I tasted Tin Fish for the first time. Some of the shops near to the college used to keep Tin Fish and it was quite popular among many of the hostelers. Tin fish preparation is very simple and takes only a few minutes. It’s utterly yummy and I became its fan in my first encounter itself. I remember, those days one tinned fish cost 50 rupees and usually we used to contribute 10 rupees per head in a group of five to enjoy our splendid meal. Those days some of us were regular Tin fish eaters and we had become addicted to it. We usually used to prepare it with boiled potatoes. Years later, nowadays also I prefer to keep Tin Fish in our refrigerator. My wife also loves it a lot. Sometimes when we are tired or there’s nothing to prepare, we usually end up making Tin Fish. The recipe is very simple and can be prepared in ten to fifteen minutes.

1. Heat cooking oil in a pan in low flame.

2. Meanwhile chop an onion and some green chilies, add them and saute till golden brown

3. Quickly chop one or two tomatoes, add them and mix properly

4. Add turmeric powder and salt, stir for a while. I usually add boiled potato or green papaya or pumpkin in it. In case of papaya and pumpkin, the recipe will take a little longer. But last time I prepared Tin Fish with only tomatoes.

5. Stir it for four to five minutes till the tomatoes get fried properly

6. Add the tuna fish along with 1/2 cup of water and cook covered for a few minutes.

7. Add freshly prepared ginger-garlic paste and mix it thoroughly

8. After a few minutes add freshly chopped coriander leaves

That’s it and done. You will get aroused with the tempting aroma and once you grab a bite, I bet the prepared Tin Fish won’t last for long.

Singara Bhujia

There used to be a small dhaba close to our hostel. Well, it’s still out there at the same place and every time I visit Guwahati, I just love to visit the college campus. The entire campus and also the dhaba as well, always uses to evoke hell lot of nostalgia out of me. I just love to stroll all around the hostel premises every time I visit there. My hands automatically light a cigarette, irrespective of whether I really wanted to have it that moment or not. It seems my body doesn't have any control over my subconscious mind that time and I always sit in those steps, even if I'm all alone. We used to spend hours gossiping in those steps during our hostel days. After few minutes, I usually go to the dhaba which fed us all those years and I miss it more than our hostel mess. I usually get extremely delighted to see some familiar faces at the dhaba and it feels really great to know that those guys still remember my name. It’s been a decade we passed out from college. 

The dhaba’s main business was in the evening and they didn't bother much about breakfast. Well, most of the guys used to have their breakfast at hostel itself or at the college canteen. But still, the dhaba guys at least had some sympathy for the extreme nocturnal ones and also for those frequent class bunkers. Tea was always available there and also those cake pieces. Aha, how can I forget those brown colored cubic shaped medium sized stuffs? Well, people call it Goza out there in Assam. It’s prepared with Maida flour and after its deep fried, the cubes are submerged in sugary syrup for hours. It tastes horribly sweet like hell and I always struggled to finish it entirely. Eggs were usually available and guys used to have it in every possible forms like boiled, omelette, single fry, double fry.  If we were lucky enough and the nearby shop was still open, we used to buy Maggi and asked the dhaba guys to prepare it. We also had the luxury to have had customized the Maggi recipe with eggs, onions, chilies and vegetables. 

In the evening everyone used to have a great time out there. Paratha/sabji was extremely popular evening snack, along with the Maggi and yes, Goza was always available.  We were fortunate enough to have tasted a unique and very innovative snack out there. Not only in that dhaba, but that particular snack was extremely popular in the entire college campus. I never ate that thing before joining college and after I passed out, I didn’t find it anywhere else either. Well, I’m talking about “Singara Bhujia”. Don’t get confused with the term Singara, as in no way it’s different from the great Indian Samosa. Singara is the same damn thing and only people call it by that name in this part of the world. I remember few times I tried it out at home, but it’s been a long time. It’s much more than a snack for us, as it’s quite capable enough to generate hell lot of nostalgia.  

I will take the pleasure to share this remarkably yummy snack with you guys.

   1. Take two pieces of Samosa and mash it using your hand.

   2. Fry some chopped onion and green chilies

   3. Don’t wait for the onions to turn completely brown and before that, just break two raw eggs and put the          inside stuffs into the frying pan.        

   4. Mix it properly and put some salt as well.

   5. Don’t wait for the egg to become just too hard and before that, put the mashed samosas in the pan.

   6. Mix it properly for a couple of minutes.

   7. Put some freshly chopped coriander leaves and mix it properly for another minute.

Just eat that damn thing hot. The very first spoonbite will make your mouth extremely juicy. It will develop your appetite instantly and I’m pretty much sure that your plate would get empty in less than a minute. Shit! My mouth is already filled with water. I think I better plan for a "Singara Bhujia" right away.

Tuku The Funda, Part-1

My dear friend Tuku, used to be quite a famous personality at hostel. He’s from one of the most famous town in Assam named Jorhat. People from Jorhat usually are very decent and they speak very sweet as well. The place can be kind of compared with Lucknow with it's sweet and Sudh Hindi, along with the traditional “Pehle Aap, Pehle Aap" decent kind of attitude of the people out there. It seemed Tuku was popular with the name Shiva in his home town before he joined the engineering college. But unfortunately Shiva name couldn’t become that popular in our college and he became famous with the name Tuku. There’s an interesting story behind the name Shiva. Actually Shiva is the name of one of the most famous Ram Gopal Varma  action movie, which was released when we were kids. The movie is based on college politics and is one of the best Indian action movies I’ve ever watched. In the movie the hero Shiva, use to ride his bicycle and in one of the scene, the goons wait for him with their hockey sticks and all. For all those who watched the movie might remember the famous cycle chain scene, where Siva use to pull his cycle chain in the very first attempt and roll it within his arm to take on the goons. Well, our Tuku was very much influenced with the movie and particularly with the chain scene. It seemed, once they had a fight at school and Tuku tried to pull the chain of his bicycle. He tried several times, but he just couldn’t pull the chain out of it completely. Well, from that day onward his school friends started to call him Shiva.

We were fortunate enough to have witnessed several interesting Tuku incidents at hostel. One day I was inside his room and was discussing about one of our batch mates and his extreme form of smoking habit. I commented about that guy and said "He’s such a chain smoker and how could he smoke two cigarettes consecutively, one after another?"

Tuku started to laugh with his typical and little weird kind of expression and replied "Hmm Hmm… Did you ever tried yourself or watched anyone in the hostel to have 5 cigarettes consecutively one after another?"

I replied "My goodness! No, never and I don’t know anyone who do like that. I mean, why the hell anyone would do that?"

Tuku started to smile with his trademark expression, with a little bit of proud self-esteem.

Well, guys usually enjoy to take pride about their consumption of heavenly spirits and the proud factor is directly proportional to the intake capacity. In one similar kind of incident, as some friends were inside a room and gossiped about the previous night party. One of the friends commented on a different friend "He's a damn tanky man and can consume hell lot of fluids"

It seemed Tuku didn't like those words much and asked everyone "What's the maximum number of pegs you guys ever had?"

Everyone got little confused and some replied as 5,6,8 etc. Few of them replied that they never counted as such. 

Then Tuku asked "Did anyone ever tried 20 pegs?"

Everyone was surprised and said "20 pegs? How could anyone have 20 pegs?"

Tuku started to smile with his trademark expression, along with those similar kind  of proud self-esteem.

In yet another incident that occurred during our first semester, some of our friends along with few of the seniors were enjoying their usual kind of spirit session in one of the rooms. I didn't have the opportunity to have experienced the delightful incident live and only got to know about that the next day. Tuku was narrating some of his heroic performances during his school days. The other guys listened to his stories with full concentration and enjoyed every bits of it. Tuku said that they used to have quite an infamous and notorious gang in his home town. Not only the common people, but even some of the policemen and local media as well, were disturbed with their activities. He continued to narrate his interesting stories and then he told about one of his best friends. It seemed his friend’s father was very much annoyed with him because of his daring activities and one day his father simply asked him to leave the house. So his friend went to Mumbai and had to struggle for a few months out there. But true talent never gets waste and one day his friend came in touch with the great D company. Within a few days after he joined the company, it seemed the D was very much impressed with him. Well, D used to be a decent guy those days and almost lived like the king of Mumbai. 

Tuku continued his thrilling story and said that one evening his friend was enjoying his drink with the D. 

D said to his friend "You are doing a wonderful job and I’m really impressed with your work. I really need more talented guys like you"

It was such a proud moment for his friend, but he was also very shy and replied "Aree Sir, Who am I? I’ve one very close friend from my home town and if you meet him and see his performance, you would simply go crazy"

D was very impressed and said "Aree Wah! Please bring your friend out here and I would love to meet such an individual"

Everyone in the room was pretty much excited and also sounded little curious. Some of them asked "Actually your friend was mentioning about whom?"

Tuku started to smile with his trademark expression and his self-respect was clearly visible on his face that moment.

Immediately the room jolted with all those applauds and someone asked Tuku "So did get any offer from the D company?"

Tuku replied "Yeah, last time I went home during Durga Pooja vacation, my friend was in town and he conveyed me with their offer. He tried to convince me a lot so that I could have worked with him"

Other guys replied "Wow! That’s really great. So did you accept the offer?"

With his usual smile Tuku replied “Are you guys mad? How could I join D company just like that? I mean its fine (little shy) Come on! I don’t want to join them”

Two Small Pegs

One good thing about taking admission in an engineering college and staying at hostels, is that guys get enough opportunity to enjoy and worship the heavenly fluids. We had the opportunity to worship a wide range of holy spirits with different types of smell and colors. Even though guys passed out from different other colleges would equally claim their devotion and intimacy with the holy spirits, but the engineers usually use to worship a little more seriously. True devotees normally don’t wait for special occasions and they regularly continue their devoutness and spirituality with extreme passion and sincerity.

During my hostel days I witnessed worshiping of the heavenly fluids in one room or the other, almost every evening and on some auspicious days (which usually used to come quite frequently), the rituals used to last till early morning. But even in such kind of a sacred environment where spirituality flowed freely all around, there were some ignorant and unfortunate guys who were totally unaware about the blessings of the heavenly spirits. I had no idea what prevented them to join the club, but I heartily appreciated their willpower. 

But even the minorities couldn’t refrained themselves from the joy and happiness of our rituals. Most of the time they enthusiastically participated in our holy act and gracefully consumed those typical snacks, including peanuts and all different sort of mixtures. Sometimes for a change we even tried to dress them with sliced onions.


How could I ever forget those fried potatoes served really hot directly from the hostel kitchen and wow! those hot and crispy big pieces of fried brinjal, stuffed with Besan was so tempting.

On one normal evening, Jishu Da heard those intriguing gossips and laughter from a nearby room. Even though he was from the minority community, but he couldn’t stop him to be part of the gathering and entered the room. Everyone inside was very excited to see Jishu Da and heartily welcomed him.  What the hell was that? It was quite an unusual kind of ritual going on that particular room and instead of colorful fluids, guys were enjoying some colorless stuffs. The room immediately busted with Jishu Da’s typical blistering laughter and he commented "Hehe Haha.. what’s wrong with U guys? Why everyone enjoying vodka tonight?"

The room was occupied with some of our seniors and even our great Kaustav Da and Thapa Da were also present that time. Jishu Da already started to consume the mixtures and Kaustav Da offered him a drink, which Jishu Da gently denied. Kaustav Da tried to convince him and said "It’s just vodka and it’s consider to be a ladies drink. Also I’ve given only a small quantity and diluted it with almost the entire glass of water. Just have few sips and if you don’t like the taste then no need to have it"

Jishu Da consciously had a couple of sips and it seemed he wasn't very embarrassed with the taste. He commented that it’s kind of tasteless and Kaustav Da clarified him that vodka’s taste just like that. So Jishu Da also joined the party and tried to consume his peg quite slowly, sip by sip. As soon as he finished half of it, his behavior changed a bit and he started to talk more frequently and much louder. Jishu Da loved to crunch those mixtures after his every possible sip. By the time he finished his entire peg, his eyes were slightly red and then Kaustav Da offered him yet another drink. Initially Jishu Da hesitated, but it seemed even he also pretty much enjoyed the heavenly blessings and couldn’t resist the temptation for long. He enjoyed his second peg for almost half an hour and behaved quite normally according to the DRINK theory, which would be very well applicable to every degree hostel. Well, the principle is based on 5 large pegs. After first peg (D), guys usually behave as if they are very decent. After second peg(R), everyone becomes little bit romantic. After third peg (I), guys suddenly claim themselves to be very intelligent. After the fourth peg(N), guys start to get little naughty and ultimately after the fifth large peg(K), it’s actually knockout time. 

Jishu Da was quite punctual with his timings and immediately after his second peg he politely asked everyone inside the room to just excuse him. He wished goodnight to everyone and returned to his room. He had a very sound and deep sleep that night, but the fact of the matter is, Jishu Da never consumed even a single drop of vodka that night, all he drank was just pure plain water.

Bhushan, The Techie

When I was in my 3rd semester of Engineering, I somehow managed to convince my father to buy me a desktop computer and ultimately bought one with a Celeron processor. Being a Computer Science Student, I was under the assumption and expected to give enough quality time to the magic box in order to become a computer genius in the next 3 years. But other than programming, I learned hell lot of other useful stuffs. Like for instance, whenever I used to get information that some guy recently got a cool music collection, I usually used to remove the hard disk from my system and used to carry it to his room. Somehow I used to convince him to open up his box, connected my hard disk and stored all the songs in it. The pirated movie CD’s were of pathetic conditions that time, as they used to hang very frequently and most of the time we had to restart the system, Aaaah! that was damn irritating. But later we got to know about some software which was able to play those kinds of CD’s smoothly without the pain of restarting the system. I also had the knowledge about some software using which I was able to store any part of the movie instead of the entire movie. That turned out to be extremely useful, as disk space was very limited those days and most of the time it was a waste to copy the entire movie, especially those entertaining kind of movies. Similarly I learned many other useful things related to computers during my Engineering days.

In the initial 3rd semester days, few of the guys were quite serious about computers, including some of our immediate seniors and everyone wanted to learn a little bit of programming. Most of us didn't know the A,B,C,D of how that damn thing worked, so we decided to join one small and affordable computer institute. We asked the guys out there to teach us from scratch, including how to switch it on and off. We learned the basics out there, including some programming as well. We continued there for a month and I think some of us didn’t even paid the entire fees. On our first day in that institute, one of the guys gave us enough gyaan and encouraged us “It’s a silly damn thing, you guys would definitely pick up pretty fast”. It was a small institute and we were 8-10 guys from our hostel. There were 3-4 computers in a room and they were placed close to each other. Everyone was pretty much excited to press the keyboard and see some output on the screen. Some of us enjoyed the paint and brush game and tried hard to make some kind of cartoon. 

But Bhushan seemed to be little upset, as he typed something on the keyboard but that didn’t reflect on his monitor. He tried few more times and then commented "Bhaak Saala, Kharab Wala Keyboard Haame Mila, it seems we got the spoiled keyboard"

The very next moment Gullu Da, our immediate senior screamed "Abbe Bhushan, why the hell are you pressing my keyboard?" So Bhushan actually typed on a different keyboard and expected output on his monitor.

Within the next couple of months my room was glorified with a desktop and I used to protect it with password. One day I was not in my room and Bhushan was in mood to watch few glimpses of a movie which was stored in my system.  Bhushan asked Nair about my password and Nair replied that I never used to share password with him. Bhushan continued to bug him for a long time. Later when I came back to my room and as I typed my password, Bhushan tried really hard to concentrate. After successful authentication, Bhushan had his typical weird kind of smile on his face and he whispered on Nair ear "Abbe Nair, I got the password"

Nair was also excited and whispered "Wow! great Bhushan, so what is the password?"

Bhushan proudly and confidently replied "It’s very simple. His password is 5 star(*****)"

Bhushan was from Mechanical Branch and during those days non IT students usually didn't use to keep personal computers. But surprisingly during our 5th semester, Bhushan bought a desktop of his own. As expected, traffic to his room increased exponentially and Bhushan didn't like that much. One Sunday morning we were simply enjoying some kind of  chitchat at Bhushan’s room and Bhushan was getting ready, as he had to go somewhere. I asked for his password which he denied and asked us to leave, as he had to lock his room. I switched on his computer but couldn't log in. I tried few wild guesses but neither of them worked. I thought to have some fun and simply reduced the contrast and brightness of his monitor to minimum and the screen went totally dark and blank. Nair was also with me that time and I asked him not to tell Bhushan anything about it and came back to my room. 

After sometime, when Bhushan realized that there’s something wrong with his computer, he got very serious and immediately asked Nair "Abbe Madrasi, Kya kar diya mere computer ko? What the hell have you done to my computer?" 

Nair replied that he didn’t even touch his computer.

Bhushan replied "Zaroor us MC, Jahid ka kaam hoga, I'm sure Jahid would be behind this"

Bhushan came to my room and screamed "What have you done to my computer? I have to leave now, please rectify it immediately"

I replied "I haven’t done anything. You never shared your password and how could I do anything without logging into the system?"

Bhushan was not at all happy with my reply and went back to his room, murmuring something. Nair also had some good time with him and even suggested few bizarre  kind of reasons for the issue with his computer. Out of frustration, Bhushan came to my room for the second time and warned me about the dire consequences if I would have had done anything wrong with his system, but my reply was the same. The drama continued and after sometime I almost forgot about the incident and enjoyed some music in my room. After about almost two hours, Bhushan suddenly came to my room and he looked very happy and said "What you had thought? I’m not a Computer Engineer, so I wouldn’t be able to know what you did to my monitor."

I replied "So, ultimately you got to know. Who gave you the solution? It must be Nair?"

Bhushan gave his usual weird kind of smile and said "Samajhta kya hai be? Tereko kya lagta hai ki mujhe kuch nahi pata?  What you guys think? That Bhushan is an ass hole?"

The Discovery Of a Metalhead

Before joining engineering college, my association with music was limited to Bryan Adams, MLTR, Eagles, Bollywood stuffs and yes, also with some of those pop shits that they used to play on MTV. In hostel we used to hear diverse range of melodies from all different rooms, but particularly it was predominated by Bollywood songs, rock and metal music, with negligible amount of pop stuffs. Even though I was in some sort of metal environment, but never took it seriously until one particular evening. 

Immediately after the ragging days, the entire fresher’s came to their true forms. The cigarettes switched hands very frequently and the heavenly fluids already started to purify the blood inside our body. Most of the hostel rooms were already blessed with music systems and everyone really enjoyed to play the music  little louder. Sabine was a metalhead and we didn’t know him quite well that time, as he joined hostel just few days before the fresher’s night. That particular evening, few of us simply strolled through the hostel campus and encountered Sabine on the way. We planned to go out to buy some cigarettes and Sabine wanted to go to his room first. I think that was for the first time I visited his room and as soon as we entered the room, Sabine switched on the music system and my goodness, terrible kind of noise started to come out the speakers, as if it was about to burst in a while. Someone asked "What the hell are you playing dude? Please change the music"

Being a die hard metal fan, Sabine got depressed with those words. He then tried to explain us about the beauty of metal and about the spirituality behind it. He gave us metal gyaan for the next 10 to 15 minutes and finally he asked us to do something. He switched off the lights and asked us to lie down on the bed. There was complete darkness inside the room and then Sabine switched on the music system.  He asked us to close our eyes and feel only the music, as if nothing else existed in this world. Sabine increased the volume and what the hell? I was enjoying it, I was really enjoying it. He played some of the classic Metallica tracks that evening in loud volume and I listened to them with both my eyes closed. Couldn't realize how the noise turned into melody for me. It pleased my ears and relaxed my mind and body to a great extent. 

After that evening, something happened to me. I felt quite happy and confident, as if I was in love.  It started that time and the bonding became stronger and stronger day by day. In fact, no other kind of music soothed me that time other than those metallic melodies. The entire four years passed so fast listening to Metallica, Iron Maiden, Megadeth, Black Sabbath and many more. Those days on every gathering and especially after the influence of heavenly fluids, hostel metalheads usually used to play video CD’s of the Metal Gods performing live on stage. Watching them we used to discuss and wondered "How it would feel to watch them live, to be part of such a concert?" 

Someone usually used to reply "Forget it, there’s no way we could experience them live in India" It felt bad but we had to believe the fact. But the world is really becoming smaller and smaller day by day. Years later, I think it was early 2007 and I was working out here in Bangalore. I got the news that Iron Maiden was coming to Bangalore for a concert. I was totally shocked and extremely delighted with that news. I just couldn’t believe even after I bought the tickets. That was some kind of a concert, totally mind blowing and out of the world. 

The crowd was extremely huge, as metalheads not only all over India, but all across the sub continent were at Bangalore that night. For the first time I witnessed something like that, some 50 thousand fans and most of them dressed in black. When they played the famous track "Fear of The Dark", my goodness it was magical and I couldn't hear Bruce Dickinson's voice at all, as the entire crowd was singing altogether. That particular concert changed the entire metal business in India and since then, hell lot of metal bands from all over the world performed out here in Bangalore. Few of my other memorable concerts were that of Metallica, Sepultura, Megadeth, Cradle of Filth, SuidAkrA and Amon Amarth. At present I'm just waiting for tomorrow's Bangalore Open Air, yes Saturday 6th of July 2013.

The Gourmand

Ragging phase was over and every one of us already connected pretty well with the seniors. By that time, we accustomed to the hostel environment and particularly the hostel food, in fact we raised ourselves up to the level where we could easily tighten our tummy with hell lot of rice, that too merely with some boiled potato and dal. Well, that was our usual kind of hostel mess condition during the last week of every month. We noticed that some of the seniors quite often used to enjoy some extra delicacies, like for instance some of them used to ask the hostel cooks to fry their share of boiled potato with some onion and green chili. Wow! My mouth is already filled with water, that thing was so damn tasty. Few of the seniors used to keep egg in their rooms and sometimes used to ask the cook to make omelet for them. Sometimes the seniors used to contribute few bucks in a group to buy chicken from outside. They used to ask the cook to prepare something really out of the world for them. As expected, such groups usually used to have late lunch/dinner on that particular day/night. First semester guys usually didn’t dare to demand special delicacies and satisfied themselves with the regular meal. But whenever the dining hall was free of seniors, even the first semester guys also used to shout “boil alu fry, boil alu fry, I want boil alu fry”

We used to have one senior Shashank Da, in our corridor and pretty close to our room. He was quite huge and used to enjoy most of his time with himself. We didn’t see him partying interacting much with the other hostel guys. He was the kind of character with whom neither his batch mates, nor even his seniors dared to take unnecessary panga, kind of argument. I still remember his laugh, as whenever he used to laugh the ceiling and the walls of the room seemed to shake a bit. By that time we didn’t know much about him and the only thing we knew is that he had an ultimate passion for food. One morning after jogging, please don’t misunderstand us to be that active, jogging was mandatory for the entire fresher’s during the ragging period. After jogging the dining hall was filled with the fresher’s and special puri sabji was served in breakfast during the entire ragging days and everyone used to have a good "eat count" of puri’s. 

One fine morning Shashank Da was also having breakfast with us and we’re not at all surprised to see his consumption rate. Shashank da encouraged all the fresher’s to eat more puri’s and then all of a sudden, one of us dared to ask him how much puri he usually used to consume. He became quite shy that moment and replied "Now a days I can’t eat much, my tummy becomes completely full with just 30-35 puri’s. When I was a fresher, I used to eat 60-65 puri’s"

One afternoon, I and Nair were just about to go for lunch and Shashank Da called from behind "Hey! Are you guys going for lunch?" We replied yes and he asked us to wait for a while, as he also wanted to go with us. We saw Shashank Da was holding 6 eggs in his hand and we were quite happy and expected a delicious lunch that day. I was very much delighted and thought "Wow! each of us would have double omelet today" We all sat in the same table and the hostel boy already served us the regular meal. Shashank Da asked the guy to prepare omelet out of the 6 eggs. I was eating little slowly and was about to shift gears once the omelet was prepared. A little later we saw that the hostel boy arrived with an extremely huge single piece omelet and kept it beside Shashank Da. The smell was mesmerizing and within a short while 50% of the omelet was already disappeared from there. After some more time Shashank Da asked us "Would you guys like to taste it?"

Nair replied "It's OK. It’s fine, we're almost done with our meal"

Later we got to know Shashank Da little more closely. Besides being a foodie, he was also a remarkable cook. He was an extreme kind of non-veg fan and experimented with every possible flesh. Whenever he wanted to have meat, most of the time he used to cook by himself and never got satisfied with anything below 1 KG. His daily requirement was much different from the other guys and everyday he used to have some special food, along with the usual hostel stuffs. It didn’t took us longer to realize that in order to maintain such kind of a lifestyle, that too in a hostel with abundant number of food desperado’s all around, Shashank Da must had to be little shameful and there was no other alternative for him. But sometimes even he was quite generous enough. 

One Influential Advice

On my first day in college, while my father discussed with our hostel warden regarding the admission formalities and all, it seemed the warden already prepared a bundle of advice for parents. He advised my father not to worry much and assured him the hostel to be quite a decent one. The warden even said that most of the seniors were extremely supportive and he himself used to keep an eye on each and every student, although it was a different matter that we didn't have enough opportunities to make ourselves accessible within the range of his eyesight, well we rarely used to see him in the hostel campus during our ragging days. My father listened to him with full concentration and felt pretty relaxed with his  wonderful words. He even asked the warden if he could report my activities to him on a regular basis?

The warden said that he could very well update him on that, but he sounded little reluctant and said that usually the freshers wouldn't discuss anything with him. He tried to convince my father on how the freshers would become smarter, that too, within just a few weeks after they join hostel. Our warden said that he would do his best and a little later,  he made my father realize about his responsibilities as a parent. 

The warden said "but as a parent, even you also have some responsibilities. I would like to tell you one thing very frankly, it’s out here, where everyone would learn to smoke and would master their boozing skills. The students usually fool their parents and would ask them for extra money. They usually give a very good excuse of buying books and trust me, Engineering books are damn costly. But most of the students wouldn't buy more than one or two books. They would either borrow them from their seniors or share among their batch mates. Of course,  some of the guys would definitely buy a few books, but you need to be very careful and whenever they visit home during vacation, you must check all the books for which they asked money from you. You should never send  any extra money  to your kids out here."

The warden continued with his commendable advice's for almost an hour. Later that day, when few of the hostel seniors allotted room for us, we tried to settle our luggage's. My father was about to leave and I, along with few of my friends came outside the hostel gate to see him off. My father acted quite differently that moment and he looked little shy, as if he was about to say something. After those last minute gestures, we  left him near the hostel gate and were about to go upstairs to our room, but all of a sudden my father asked me to wait. With little discomfort, but very politely he asked me to show how much money I had in my wallet? As soon as I opened my wallet, he immediately grasped it and started to calmly count the money. He counted it twice and then he kept almost half of the money with himself and returned the remaining amount to me. I was totally blank and simply wondered "What the F?" I felt so weird and tried to justify him, but he immediately interrupted and said “It’s OK, if you are short of money, just call me and I would immediately send it to you." 

After listening to those influential advice from our very own warden, I opted to remain silent that moment. But fortunately it only had a short term influence on my father and things became pretty normal from the very next month.

The Indecent Confession

The ragging phase was over and we recently got our fresher’s that time.  We all were accustomed quite well to the hostel environment and everything seemed to be so perfect and exciting. During those days there was no cable connection at our hostel and internet connection was out of scope. There was not even a single cyber cafe in the entire college campus and the few cafe's in the city, used to charge about 60-80 rupees/hour. Those days, it was not considered as a crime, if anyone wouldn't have known some of the terms like MP3, Email, URL, Browser etc. Situation turned quite rapidly and within 2 years, after we joined college, the entire scenario was changed.

Similar to our school days, in engineering hostel also it was quite customary to rent VCR for 24 hours.  But we didn’t have much opportunity to do that, as the situation transformed so fast that we couldn't realize when, renting VCR/Video cassettes became out of fashion. We were into our first semester, when we had our first and last opportunity to enjoy a VCR fest at hostel and I think, that was my last opportunity in general.

It seemed, most of the hosteler were only interested in the spiritual kind of movies. Well, they could have easily watched the regular kind of Bollywood/Hollywood blockbusters in the theaters. Everyone eagerly waited for the spiritual late night fest, but on that particular evening, it was a kind of shocker for us, when some of our immediate seniors came to us and said that the first semester guys would not be entertained for the fest. We were so depressed that moment and when we asked for the reason, they said that some of the senior most guys were not very comfortable to participate along with the junior most guys. 

So, ultimately we were requested, rather we were warned, not to be present anywhere near the common room. Some of our senior friends advised us to sleep early and we actually tried to sleep early that night. Our room was little far from the common room but Nair’s room was quite close to it. All of a sudden during the midnight, Nair came to our room and he looked quite disturbed. He said that the volume in the common room was too loud and the entire 2nd block echoed with the sacred chants. Nair was very much disturbed with those sounds and he couldn’t concentrate on his sleep. He desperately wanted to somehow watch some part of the movie, else he could have gone mad that night. I still remember, that time I cracked a joke on him "Dude, pure Mallu blood running inside your body"

Few of us went along with Nair to his block, to inspect the situation and we were so excited to hear the holy chants, crystal clear. After sometime, we went back to our room and discussed "We must do something about it"

Nair said that we could go to the backside of the common room and watch through the window from behind. But, that would have been too risky, as our common room was in a small hill and the back side of it was complete jungle and no one used to go there, even in broad day light. The consequences could have been little severe, if any of the seniors would have caught us. But we were spirituality, so deeply influenced that moment, that I and Nair were ready for the adventure. Mehboob immediately backed off and advised us not to go for it, but Nair had gone crazy that night and was desperate to have few glimpses of the holy shits. But there was a small problem, as Geetam was also very much eager to go along with us. Now, Geetam was a chatter box and he was the kind of guy, who couldn’t keep  any secret inside his stomach, for long. We were seriously worried to take Geetam along with us, but he was adamant. Finally we three went for it and somehow reached the backside of the common room. That was a horrific decision, as we could have been easily attacked by the snakes, but I think that time we didn’t have enough knowledge about those snakes. We took our position behind the window and the television was clearly visible. The common room was completely packed and we were delighted to see those particular senior most guys, as they took the central position and we even heard them cracking jokes on a particular scene. We watched for around 10-15 minutes and after I and Nair were done with it, we were about to go back to our rooms. But Geetam was not finished yet and requested us for another 5 minutes. 

We waited few more minutes, but Geetam was unable to finish it on time. 

Nair said to him “Leave it Geetam, lets go back. You can finish it after going back to your room”

Geetam got very irritated and said "You ass hole, you guys are already done with it and now you are not allowing me to complete"

Every more minute we spent out there, was almost like a nightmare and the fear of getting caught, haunted us badly. We decided not to disturb Geetam and allowed him to take his own sweet time, as he would have definitely taken more time under pressure.  Finally Geetam said that he was done with it and we went back to our room. 

My Friend Mustaque, Part-3

My Friend Mustaque, Part-1

My Friend Mustaque, Part-2

It was already dinner time and we were about to go to our hostel mess, in another 10 to 15 minutes. In the meanwhile we continued our typical, as well as idle kind of chitchats. It was pretty common for us to gather in any damn room before dinner, specially in rooms where we could smell some kind of gathering. Everyone would sit comfortably in the bed and used to discuss on any random topic, mostly meaningless topics though, while the cigarette switched hands very frequently.  That particular evening, we were discussing about Celine Dion, the lady vocalist of the famous Titanic song "My Heart Will Go On". All of a sudden Mustaque entered the room with a bang and he had no clue what we were discussing about, that moment. He might have heard few words of our conversation and he didn’t hesitate to participate in the discussion and said "Celina Jaitly to bohut m*** hai"     "Celina Jaitly is damn sexy"

One of my friend couldn't stop his laughter and another friend clarified Mustaque “Hehe dude! we were actually discussing about Celine Dion."

There was no doubt that Mustaque didn't listen him properly and to be honest he was not a good listener at all. Mustaque gave his view one more time and said "Sunny Deol ka to maat bolo"   "Don’t talk about Sunny Deol and his movies, he alone can take on 100 opponents and that too without any scratch on his body." The room jolted with our loud and collective laughter and again one of my friend tried to clarify him "Dude, we were discussing about Celine Dion, the Titanic Singer"

Mustaque started to laugh that moment and along with his trademark slang, he almost screamed "Oh! Ceelaane...”  

My Friend Mustaque, Part-2

My Friend Mustaque, Part-1

After we joined hostel, for the initial 2 months we used to visit our relatives quite often. The more appropriate term would be "LG", i.e. Local Guardian.  Almost everyone had some form of LG in the Guwahati city. LG need not necessarily be a guardian, in the true sense.  It could be any damn known person, could be a friend as well and we only had to say to our seniors that we would go to visit our LG. During the ragging period it was kind of customary for the fresher’s to visit LG over the weekends. After a few LG visits, it got quite monotonous to drop out there so frequently.  But there was no other option left, as most of the fresher’s preferred not to stay at the hostel during the weekends. Once the ragging period is over, the LG visits decreased exponentially for all of us.

In those early hostel days, one Saturday afternoon, I was well prepared to visit my LG. I was seated beside Mustaque inside the college bus, which used to go till Kachari, the heart of the city. I and Mustaque planned to watch a movie and I thought it would be better to watch in a theater, which was located in the other part of the city. So, we went to Anuradha Cinema Hall and the movie they were showing  that time was "Dil Se". We bought the tickets and were quite happy and relaxed, as we were quite sure that none of the college seniors would come that far for movie.

The movie was OK, not that boring and the "Chaiya Chaiya" song and it's choreography was fantastic. After a few minutes, I asked  Mustaque something regarding the movie, but he didn’t respond. Initially I thought, perhaps he's watching  the movie with his full concentration, but to my surprise he was actually sleeping. I woke him up and he started to smile and said that he was a bit tired. He was alive for a while and then started to snore like a lousy animal. I got little embarrassed, as people nearby got little pissed off and started to shoot glances towards us. Again I woke him up and he was alive for few more minutes. The same process repeated throughout the movie and I was literally frustrated with him.  I thought Mustaque might be very tired  that day and that’s why he acted like that, but later we realized,  it was actually quite difficult for Mustaque to survive the entire movie, no matter how interesting the movie was. 

When I was in my 3rd semester, my father bought me a desktop computer, the one which had Celeron processor inside. That was the first computer in the entire hostel, so it deserved a fabulous welcome and it actually got the kind of welcome it deserved. On the inauguration day of my desktop, we bought 2 movie CD’s on rent, out of which one was those exotic kinds of movies. The system was up the entire night and it delivered countless number of shows. For the next few months there was tremendous load on the system and initially I was little possessive about my desktop. I strictly asked my friends to leave their shoes/sandals outside and not to smoke inside the room. But those 2 rules were followed only for the initial  few days. By the next semester, gradually many more guys started to keep their own computers, so the load was distributed and instead of having show in one particular room,  we used to have multiple shows in multiple rooms simultaneously,  just like a multiplex. 

In those days, one afternoon Mustaque bought a movie CD from somewhere and said to us "it’s a damn good movie, let’s watch it after lunch". Very soon, many of my friends came to our room to watch the movie. Everyone took their position  in the bed and literally each and every corner of the bed was utilized. We didn’t have enough space to sit comfortably, but Mustaque out of his usual habit, somehow managed enough space for him to lie down. The movie Mustaque recommended that afternoon was “A Beautiful Mind”. No doubt it’s a damn good movie and it even won a few Oscars, but such kind of movies could be boring as well, depending on individual’s mood.

As usual, after watching the movie for 10 to 15 minutes, Mustaque went to deep sleep with his mouth wide open and after few more minutes he started to snore piercingly. By that time, we were already aware of the fact that there’s no point to wake him up. Mustaque continued to snore all throughout the movie and came back to life, just few minutes before the movie was about to finish. Finally few of my friends felt happy, as ultimately the movie ended and at that moment, Mustaque became little serious and commented "Wow! Bohut accha movie tha yaar"    "Wow!  It was really a great movie to watch"

My Friend Mustaque, Part-3