Friday Funny: "The Scarf" (How NOT To Tie One) + Costume Preview

Yeah, so, you know that feeling you get when you're trying to tie a scarf just right... or you keep putting on different skirts and yet somehow NONE of them work with the top you're wearing, but when you change your top, the new top doesn't work, and you start to leave the house, but then you stop and look in the mirror and you're just like. WAIT. NO. And you're late for something, but ...

Then you may get a little deja vu while watching this comedy video short by my friend Stephanie Bencin (no blog, but she's on Tumblr and Twitter), a fabulous up-and-coming comedy writer/filmmaker. Stephanie is a documentary film researcher by day, and by night writes for The Prom, a sketch comedy team that performs at New York's Upright Citizen's Brigade Theatre (founded by the awesome Amy Pohler, among others).

Anyway, Stephanie recently drafted me to do what could very generously be called costume design (to say I am not on a Dreamstress level would be an understatement) for another upcoming video... the same comedy costuming project I mentioned before that required I buy copious amounts of (shudder) fleece. Here's a sneak peek--Z was really sad she couldn't keep the costume when it was done.

And the above video details:

"The Scarf"

• Written by Stephanie Bencin
• Directed and Edited by Adam Sacks
• Shot by Andy Bond
• Starring Moujan Zolfaghari
• Featuring Lauren Adams, Sasheer Zamata and Matt Cutler
• Music by Lawrence Kim

If you enjoy the video, please do your part for female comedians and leave comments here or on YouTube, share it on Facebook, Twitter and so on--Stephanie is just starting to do more of these comedy shorts and any feedback and exposure would have a super big impact! (AND would likely mean you will get to see more entertaining costuming projects here in future).

P.S. Sorry to those of you reading on non-video-friendly devices, but it's worth emailing or bookmarking and watching later!

P.P.S. Speaking of scarves, how beautiful (if super large) is Sarai's scarf collection? I only own 6 or 7 and I really need to start wearing them more often. Honestly, I am terrified of my poor scarf manipulation skills, and in a fit of anxiety a few years ago actually purchased two books on scarf tying.

P.P.P.S. Here I am in 2009 on a rare scarf-wearing occasion in Paris with a turquoise Diane Von Furstenberg silk scarf I bought on deep sale ages back. I definitely didn't have it on right, but cliché or no, I was more scared of NOT wearing a scarf in Paris than wearing it wrong, if that makes sense:

In Passionate Defense of Orange

Super duper thing-linked photo shoot of a small selection of the orange clothing items I hold near and dear

Orange orange orange. I love orange. I love my orange dresses, my orange shoes, my orange sweatshirt, my orange necklaces and my orange scarf. If I had orange socks and orange boots and orange hats and orange bras, I would love them too (hmmm...).

I love the orange sweater that I knit for my daughter...

... and the orange sweater and hat that my Aunt Becky knit for her too.

And the yellow, brown and ORANGE dress I made for her:

And the orange newborn dress from her Nana she barely fit into for a week:

And I REALLY miss the orange and white cats I had as a kid--Ozma and Hecuba--and my sickly little orange and white cat Riley:

You guys, I love orange so much I even married an Orange man. (That's right--Masheka went to Syracuse).

I will wear orange no matter what the season, and no matter what the trends, whether it is hot, not, or totally over and out. In fact, I have all this lovely orange cotton stretch sateen I got from Fabric-Mart a while back at $1/yard...

And I'm so going to make a bright orange shirt dress with it!

And I haven't even mentioned home decor--I've got an orange bathroom, orange towels, an orange Le Creuset dutch oven and orange bowls and plates and serving dishes and Z has an orange water bottle and orange blocks and ... But I digress.

In sum, orange--whether bright, burnt, subdued, or neon--is beautiful, transcendent and fabulous. (Just ask Clio).

Whatever a CERTAIN one of my FAVORITE sewing bloggers and some cruel commenters might imply. (For shame, Male Pattern Boldness! What could be bolder than orange? Isn't there orange in your blog header photo?!)

P.S. Like Clio, I was in the process of knitting orange socks when I read Peter's anti-orange attack. Unfortunately, they got destroyed in the aftermath of my little photo shoot...

Polka Dot Wardrobe Domination: Week #1 (A Little Help from Lucky)

"If you're anything like me, deep down all you really want is a closet filled with your favorite things. These are the clothes that make you happy to put on, that make you feel like yourself. Instead, many of us feel that we have a closet stuffed with clothes and nothing we want to wear."
--Sarai Mitnick, The Colette Sewing Handbook (Chapter Two: A Thoughtful Plan)

"So it's strapless and you can't wear strapless bras... and it doesn't quite fit... and the zipper's busted... and it's kind of a bad color for you, but what if someday you wear it with some really cute cardigan or you sew some straps on it... and it was such a find... and you dont have another one like it, so, well... um..."
--The Voices in the Back of My Head When I am Decluttering, Mikhaela's Brain (Chapter 3: Just Shove it In the Back of the Sock Drawer)

So I realized that before plowing headfirst into a ton of random on-a-whim sewing projects, I should step back and evaluate my existing wardrobe and ruthlessly eliminate anything that doesn't fill a need, suit my style/life/lifestyle or make me ridiculously happy, and ask deep probing questions like "Why the hell is my sweater drawer stuffed with 20 pairs of threadbare high-waisted maternity panties?"

THEN I can really start adding new, fun and exciting yet totally wearable stuff, right?

I used to do this every six months--I'd try a ton of stuff on, prance back in forth in front of the full-length, listen to Peter Walsh's "It's All Too Much" audiobook, and be really, truly ruthless. My last great purge was during my pregnancy (shoes gone by here) in order to make room for baby.

Since then, things have gotten out of hand. My husband does most (er, all) of the laundry and just shoves things away in random drawers when I don't get around to it myself in reasonable time (thank you honey!). I've barely done any shopping, but since I only have 8 small drawers and half a small closet for ALL my clothes and shoes (including off-season and special occasion), everything is squished, squashed, wrinkled and unreachable.

With a little elbow grease, I can extract about five or six tops, a few sweaters and a single pair of jeans, so I wear them over and over and over again. Repeatedly.

So I'm going to attempt one drawer per night and then the closet until I'm done. I have some helpers, too (ignore the spelling error on the binder, please!):

1. The Lucky Shopping Manual: Building and Improving Your Wardrobe Piece by Piece. I don't even read Lucky anymore, but I read this book over and over. It really helps me think about what's in my wardrobe in a smart, fun and inspirational way. There's a section for each general item--skirts, pants, suits, lingerie, shoes, coats, bag, etc--with suggestions on basic wardrobe needs, different types of the item, when to save, when to splurge... It's nearly ten years old but doesn't feel at all dated. (Just ignore the advice about which clothing styles are best suited for which figure type--I certainly do).
   
   
2. My binders of inspirational style clippings from assorted fashion magazines and clothing catalogs. What with the advent of Polyvore (and now Pinterest, and the dilemma over what to capture where...?!) I don't update these anymore, but it's more fun to page through than the digital versions.
   

So, yes: all systems go! And then to the fun sewing planning stuff.

How about you all--how's your New Year's wardrobe planning going?

P.S. I don't really recommend Lucky's newer book, by the way: The Lucky Guide to Mastering Any Style. It was a total disappointment--the only style I related to at all was "Bombshell", but it was a really pigeonholed and by-the-book version of bombshell--I didn't need a book to lay it out for me:

P.P.S. After your excellent comments and some Deep Introspection, I've decided to throw all caution to the wind and sew up my wide-legged corduroy trousers WITHOUT A SINGLE COMPLEX ALTERATION to the pattern. I never do this so it scares me, but if I cut wide enough seam allowances (1") I think I'll be able to force myself.

(Retro) Style Icon: Amy Adams as Mary in "The Muppets" (with a sewing twist)

Forget that new Muppet or the green felted frog--how cute is Amy Adams in that beautiful green dress with tulip sleeves?!

So I went to the new Muppet movie and it was fun and all, but I had a little trouble paying attention to Fozzie's bad jokes or Kermit's attempts to make up with Miss Piggy because OH MY GOODNESS I WANTED ALL OF AMY ADAMS's clothes.

Ms. Adams plays Mary, a Shop teacher who fixes cars and does electrical work, all whilst wearing a parade of lovely retro-styled dresses and blouse/skirt combos. She's all about bright-colored belts, fitted bodices and flared skirts...

Also: pintucks.

And stripes!

Polka dots (or polka-dot-like hearts, I think), too...

Not to mention sweetheart necklines:

But the part of the movie where I got really distracted was the finale. Mary was wearing an adorable little jacket, but the fabric of the blouse peeking out from underneath looked oddly familiar... and then she took off her jacket.

I practically fell out of my seat with sewing-related excitement! Because it was the same orange floral silk twill I used for my vintage 1970s orange floral maternity dress ages ago:

Apparently Muppets shop at Fabric-Mart too!

Oh, and I'm not the only one who noticed this or made a dress or a jacket from this popular fabric.

The Shoe Killer

The code of the merciless shoe killer: All shoes, boots and sandals must be (1) comfortable and (2) super cute and (3) fit in the bottom of half of a small Brooklyn apartment closet, with frequently worn shoes permitted access to the bottom of a small IKEA bookshelf and a single pair of snow boots allowed safe haven in the hall closet. There are to be no off-season shoes in the sock/underwear/utensil/spice drawers, on top of the art supply cabinet, or under the crib.

Ladies and gentlemen, I'm a shoe killer. Or a shoe abandon-er, anyway. After a lifetime of near-hoarderism (we're talking saving napkins with scribbles on them), something in my packrat soul just snapped last year. Maybe it was the repeated listening to motivational anti-clutter audiobooks, maybe it was Pregnancy Brain.

Either way, I finally lined up my overflow shoes, took a long last lingering look over their straps and buckles, their cute rounded toes, their retro feel, their adorable detailing and sturdy heels... and shot them. For the eBay auction gallery.

• The Victim: Brown Mary Janes with Scalloped Suede Detailing (Kenneth Cole Reaction)
  
• The Motive: Despite love of Mary Janes and sturdy low heels, repeatedly found excuses to wear other shoes instead. Perhaps it was the square toes, perhaps the lack of sock lining.
• Regrets: None. Cute shoes deserve to be worn.

The same cruel fate befell two other pairs of similar kitten heels. Even red top-stitching couldn't save these babies:

• The Victim: Strappy Silver Metallic Almost-Wedding Sandals (Van Eli)
  
• The Motive: I bought two similar styles on Zappos for my wedding in 2007, and these never made it down the aisle.
• Regrets: Eh. I hardly have use for one pair of metallic strappy heels, never mind two. But we had some good times:
  

• The Victim: Chartreuse Wedge Sandals (Born)
  
• The Motive: Atoning for a DSW impulse buy. I'm all about chartreuse everything, but after hobbling around in them at a gallery opening one night, I learned my lesson about wooden wedges and about fake "arch support" areas.
• Regrets: I regret nothing.

• The Victim: Mid-calf Black Leather Boots (Timberland)
  
• The Motive: I can only fit two pairs of boots in my closet--one flat pair, one heeled pair--and the other heeled pair was cuter.
• Regrets: We'll always have my Cavalier-and-Klay-inspired "Luna Moth" Halloween costume from 2004 (sewn up with some random Simplicity fairy costume pattern):
  

• The Victim: Sling-back black Mary Jane heels with patent leather toe (Cole Haan)
  
• The Motive: Um... WHAT WAS I THINKING? Probably something like "I'm so pregnant I will never wear heels again, even really amazingly cute heels that I got on a ridiculous sale and that are both sexy and work appropriate and only slightly uncomfortable and are super awesome pretty shoes that go with everything and didn't even sell for much on eBay and will never come back in my life again..." Crap.
• Regrets: I don't want to talk about it. I'M SO SORRY.

And finally, because this is Polka Dot Overload, after all:

• The Victim: My only pair of polka dot shoes in the whole wide world (Privo by Clarks)
  
• The Motive: When I saw them on eBay, it felt like destiny: red polka-dot flats from Clarks for $14? I thought my feet would love them forever...

  Until they arrived and I realized they had no arch support, made my size 10 feet look like giant boats, and reminded Masheka of Minnie Mouse.

• Regrets: I regret only that I had but one pair of polka dot shoes to give for... Er...

It's been almost a year. As I look back I can't help shed a tear or two sometimes for my shoes gone past...

But it's nice to be able to open the medicine cabinet without sandals falling on my head.

How's your spring cleaning going? Have you given any shoes the boot?

P.S. In my next post: the shoe survivors.

Photo in Wanted illustration by Márta Fodor.

Orange Birthday Peep Toes!

So remember how Cartoonist Husband told me I shouldn't buy myself shoes or clothes with my 30th birthday money--that books or DVDs would be a more fun gift?

Apparently that was a classic Masheka fake-out (he's quite poker-faced and I'm quite gullible). So feast your eyes on these retro peep-toed beauties that he got me, a pair of lovely yet comfortable orange Tsubo Erebus heels that I'd been coveting ever since I first read about the brand on Already Pretty. I refuse to wear pointy toes, spiky heels or any shoe that can't actually be walked in (I'm a car-less Brooklynite, remember), so I get REALLY excited when I find heels that are comfortable, sturdy AND sexy.

Here they are in action--sort of. I can't actually wear even the comfiest heels these days (I can barely walk in sneakers or my comfy Privo by Clarks flats at this point), but I just had to play dress-up. The top is of course my heavily modified Jalie 2005, and the maternity skirt is a $2 thrift find.

I can't wait to wear these post-pregnancy! I haven't talked much about shoes here, but I adore a colorful comfy retro heel! Two of my other favorites...

My red Camper Mary Janes (shown here at 25 weeks pregnant with my red BurdaStyle maternity-modified "Melissa" skirt):

I got these at Soula in Brooklyn back in February (when I could still wear heels!), but I believe they're still available. Camper calls them the "Kim" pump, but I prefer to think of them as my ruby slippers. Here's a product shot:

My chartreuse Gentle Soles (or Souls?) heels, shown here with a Liz Lange by Target dress at 23 weeks pregnant:

I got these at least three or four years ago (also at Soula) and I don't think they're the same brand as the Gentle Souls/Soles sold by Kenneth Cole--I think they were imported from somewhere in Europe but I haven't seen them in any stores in a very long time. I've walked miles in them and they are fabulous.

Oh, and in case you're wondering what I got myself for my birthday -- I did indeed order the walking foot for my Viking (hasn't arrived yet), Blueprints of Fashion: Home Sewing Patterns of the 1940s and a dystopian science fiction novel by Nnedi Okorafor called Who Fears Death. (I don't know that I've mentioned it, but I am a HUGE speculative fiction nerd, in literature, television shows AND film--do NOT get me started, I am obsessed).

39 Weeks Pregnant Casual Outfit

The one upside to STILL being terribly, uncomfortably pregnant is that I am STILL getting tons of mileage out of all the maternity pieces I sewed throughout my pregnancy! For example, here's what I'm wearing today... for a busy day of lying on the couch knitting a baby sweater and MAYBE waddling around my building for a one or two-block walk if I can manage it.

• Turquoise necklace: handmade birthday gift by my friend Márta Fodor. Cost: free
• Purple maternity top: my maternity modification of the Burda magazine 02-2010-122 knit top, made back in February (details here). Cost (fabric and magazine): $15. Cost per wear: $0.75.
• Spiral-print knit skirt: Made it myself, it's an unmodified Kwik Sew 3513 View B (details here). Cost (fabric and pattern): $10.50. Cost per wear: $0.50
• Black Mary Jane flats: Privo by Clarks. Cost: $80. Cost per wear: $0.80.

Total Cost: $105.50.

Total Cost Per Wear (so far): $2.05.

The skirt still fits great. The top fits but in retrospect I should have planned better for my expanding bosom--the empire seam under the bust is not really under the bust anymore. I did do quite a bit of FBA originally, but it just needed more length, I think. Whatever!

More views:

And as a comparison, here's how pregnant I was when I originally sewed these pieces...

Original skirt photo, from 28 weeks pregnant:

Original purple top photo, from 24 weeks:

Come on Cartoonist Baby... I don't want to be taking 40-week pictures next weekend!