My mind is filled with millions of thoughts and my heart is beating at the pace that is giving me scare! My hands are trembling and I feel bit nauseous. It looks like I am showing every signs of nervous breakdown as I try to calm my loud heart. I am afraid that loud noise of my beating heart will wake my Lil Dumpling lying next to me without any worry in the world. How I wish I could sleep that way without having to worry about anything! Well, it’s been a while since I slept through the night without worrying about the never ending list of things to do...
As I try to calm the voices that shout and scream loudly in my mind, I look around the dimly lit room that was once filled with little bits and pieces of our life. This is a room where we three lay our head in the night on a soft pillow, cuddling and hugging one another, our arms thrown carelessly around each other and our legs tangled under the blanket. I try to visualise the bed, the dresser, cloths in the closets, photo frames scattered around the room, night lights, piles of books and many other pieces of furnishing that once made this room a peaceful sanctuary are now carefully wrapped in a bubble wrap and packed in a brown cardboard boxes. I slowly get up from the makeshift bed on the floor, not to wake my little boy, and tip toe to next room which is as bare as the room I just left. I run down the stairs, very well knowing the sight that will welcome me. I walk from one room to another that were once filled with pieces and mementos of our lives, colours, cushions, books, toys, lovingly hand picked knick-knacks, pots and pans, photos and frames, cry and laughter, tears and joy, light, warmth and every other things that makes a house into a home. It’s all gone! It’s now just an empty shell… But…
