Last week my 12 year old son and I made a bet.
It was his idea, because betting me is easy money. I wouldn’t be surprised if Congress stopped mid-trying to balance the budget with a “Eureka! Let’s just bet Marinka the amount of the deficit!”
Anyway. He wanted to bet on the outcome of the World Series. I was game. Because if there’s one thing that I’m confident about, it’s my ability to pick a winner of that particular contest.
“You are on, young man,” I said, except without the young man part because what am I, 90? “I just have a few questions.”
I actually had only one question, specifically, which teams are in the World Series. If you’re spoiler-free, you may want to skip this part, but it turns out that the Cardinals and the Red Sox are jostling for the World Series Championship.
“Ok,” having been armed with this useful information, I was ready to proceed.
“Which do you want, the Cardinals or the Red Sox?” my son asked.
I didn’t want to show my hand, the hand of having no idea, so I smiled at him with what I hoped was a great deal of baseball wisdom.
“Why don’t you pick,” I said.
“Cardinals!” he said.
“Yes, that’s an interesting choice,” I nodded sagely. By the way, have you noticed that when people say something is interesting in response to whatever it is you’re droning on about, they usually mean it in the complete opposite sense? Interesting to ponder, no?
“That means you have the Red Sox,” he explained to me. He had met me on previous occasions so he had a keen understanding of my baseball knowledge.
And so we were off.
He wrote up our Betting Contract.
If the Cardinals win, I am supposed to supply him with endless Forbidden Snacks and if the Red Sox win, he’s going to unload the dishwasher every day for two weeks, complaininglessly.
So the tensions are high.
They are made higher by the fact that I keep forgetting which team I bet on and the pain he feels in having to remind me.
“Ugh, why do they have those horrific beards?” I ask and he doesn’t answer.
Last night, I overheard him talking to the TV. “Come on, Beltran,” he was saying, “I don’t want to have to unload the dishwasher.”
Unfortunately we have one of those old-fashioned TVs where the people inside can’t hear what you’re saying to them.
So far the Red Sox are leading the series. I just hope there’s not a smoothest shave category.
One year ago ...
- A Few Words - 2011
{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }
Twitter: hessleman
October 29, 2013 at 8:27 am
I shall root for the Red Sox on your behalf as unloading the dishwasher is a child’s job.
It was the Red Sox, right?
Twitter: deckthoughts
October 29, 2013 at 9:36 am
He should probably just start his two weeks of dishwasher unloading now because the Sox are going home to Boston with a 3-2 lead in the best of 7 series. To date, there have been 2 historic game-ending events during the series. Since the Sox have never won the World Series on their home turf, a 3rd historic event is on the horizon. Why bother waiting for the formalities?
Here’s how you remember which team you’re rooting for. You picked the RIGHT TEAM! As a life long Red Sox fan I could feel that we had an extra force pulling for us this year. I should have known it was a mother with the possibility of complaint-free chores hanging in the balance.
Keeping up with the family traditions, I just bought more NOK stock
Your son, the Cardinal fan, is AWESOME! Go Cards!
I hate to start something between you and the young man, but if he’s an actual Cardinal fan and not just rooting against the Sox, going to a Cardinal game next year at Busch Stadium would be a dream come true. Opening Day is in the spring, right near school holidays, and people in St. Louis take off from school and work to attend. All the old-timers are honored, there are numerous ceremonies, and the spirit in the stadium is just second to none. All that good old-fashioned baseball love and nostalgia rolled up into one afternoon. Oh, and sometimes afterward, the home team wins 🙂
You got him to bet that if he loses he will unload a dishwasher? My son has now backslid on taking dishes from his bedroom. And they have sometimes been in the sink, but never made it to the dishwasher. The 15 year old who has put together complicated mechanics, involving understanding of circuit boards and even fired a gun for a performance finds the dishwasher too challenging. He’s not a sports fan, so I need to find another thing to bet on for a basic chore. Any further ideas?
Yes, this was very interesting.
Go Sox! The dishwasher unloading is just more fuel for my fire. 🙂
Shoot! I was rooting for your son and the Cards on this one…
The Amish team is going to win so you better stock up on forbiddin snacks. Wait, loop hole alert – he didn’t say anything about buying them.
Twitter: jukeboxbarb
October 31, 2013 at 11:17 am
Is Marinka still smiling?