Sonic the Hedgehog 3, Featuirng the Voice of Keanu Reeves

Sonic is so fast, he outran Covid, grossing almost $150 million domestic (over $300 million worldwide) on a mid-February 2020 opening. Of course, his tail was cut somewhat short due to theater closures, but the sequel made even more money. Running is what Sonic does best, but he struggles with tasks that require quiet subtlety, or as his fans would say, the boring stuff. With the second film, Sega fans got even more of what they want and the trend continues in Jeff Fowler’s Sonic the Hedgehog 3, which opens this Friday in theaters.

Sonic is a big blue talking alien hedgehog who came to Earth in the first film after his guardian was tragically killed. In the second film, Sonic met his constant companions, Miles Prower a sensitive fox and Knuckles, a pugilistic echidna. Their longtime nemesis remains Dr. Ivo Robotnik, a.k.a. Eggman, but the former government scientist turned supervillain has lately fallen on hard times.

Apparently, another evil genius re-purposed Robotnik’s special drones to attack G.U.N., the Men-in-Black like agency (but with proper uniforms) that handles aliens like Sonic—and frees Shadow the Hedgehog, Sonic’s evil equivalent, from his cryogenic prison. Perhaps Sonic and Robotnik will forge a temporary alias to save the world from Shadow, or perhaps not.

Sonic’s whole deal is his speed, so Fowler duly delivers scene after scene of his fleet footwork. It might be true to the character and the games, but for non-fans, the repetition grows dull. Fortunately, the new film also brings back James Marsden and Tika Sumpter as Tom and Maddie Wachowski, because they have surprisingly endearing chemistry together and help supply the human touch the film needs more of.

Admittedly, Idris Elba’s gruff voice-overs as Knuckles are so consistently amusing, it is easy to see why his character starred in the spin-off streaming series. Likewise, Keanu Reeves growls with Method-level intensity as Shadow, having reportedly done his Sonic homework. On the other hand, Ben Schwartz might have the right tone for Sonic according to what fans expect, but adults unfamiliar with the franchise will be underwhelmed by his brashly juvenile-sounding portrayal of Sonic. Yet, he remains palatable.

On the other hand, a little of Jim Carrey, as Robotnik (and in a not-so-secret dual role), goes a long, long, long way. Seriously, Carrey piles shtick on top of shtick, while mugging and pratfalling like both his face and bones are made out of rubber. It quickly grows tiresome.

Secret Level, on Prime

"Live, die, repeat” was the tagline and Macguffin of Edge of Tomorrow, but it is just how things work in video games. Some of these animated short films cleverly incorporate that aspect of gameplay. Each original constituent film is set within the world of a popular game (including massively multiplayer online RPGs), but maybe not too popular, since their rights were still available. As is usually the case for anthologies, the results vary considerably in creator Tim Miller’s 15-part Secret Level, which premieres tomorrow on Prime Video.

There is a lot of CGI, featuring human depictions that try and most often fail to traverse the uncanny valley. As a result, some of the less “realistic” looking films stand out more. The opener, “Dungeons & Dragons: The Queen’s Cradle” is a perfect example of the CGI look that will quickly grow repetitive. However, the story written by Brooke Bolander certainly delivers on its promise of dragons. It is also one of the more successful at character establishment. However, the cliffhanger-style ending feels like a bit of a cheat (which too, will be a recurring response throughout Secret Level).

The next two constituent films are also two of the best. “Sifu: It Takes a Life,” directed by Laszlo Ruska with a story credited to Rich Larson is a mystical martial arts beatdown, in which our hero takes on a brutal gang to avenge his grandfather, even if it kills him, repeatedly, just so long as he still has one of his lives signified by a string of gold coins left after the carnage.

“New World: The Once and Future King,” written by JT Petty & Philip (The Spine of Night) Gelatt, is by far the funniest, thanks to voiceover work of Arnold Schwarzenegger, who gamely satirizes his own action image while providing the voice of the hapless King Aelstrom. The entitled idiot intended to conquer the kingdom of Aeternum, but since the land there bestows eternal life, it creates a meritocracy among residents, leaving him ill-equipped maintain the status he expects by birthright.

“Unreal Tournament: Xan” looks very much like many other Secret Level mini-sodes. The hook here is that it openly invites viewers to root for the “rise of the machines” and against humanity when the evil Gamemaster (voiced by Elodie Yung) condemns a group of rebellious androids to a series of gladiatorial games against humans. Doesn’t that just sound like a really bad idea?

The lowest point probably comes in “Warhammer 40,000: And They Shall Know No Fear,” in which a group of space-faring marines are dispatched on a mission that is almost impossible to follow, because the animation is so confusing.

If you are expecting anything like the old Saturday morning cartoon from Victor (Nocturna) Maldonado & Alfredo Torres’ “PAC-MAN: Circle,” you will be shocked. In this case, it an extremely dark allegorical take on the classic arcade game. The ambition here is impressive, but your nostalgia will be dashed to smithereens, so temper your expectations.

Damian (Another Day of Life) Nenow’s “Crossfire: Good Conflict” is a refreshing change of pace, partly because it is the only short that does not incorporate any science fiction or fantastical elements. It also tells a fully self-contained and satisfying story, while maintaining a high degree of ambiguity regarding the why’s of everything. There is also a whole heck of a lot of shooting.

“Armored Core: Asset Management,” based on a Peter Watts story, also feels very similar to the “Unreal Tournament” and “Warhammer 40,000” episodes, but it is easier to follow and features stronger characters. It has the benefit of Keanu Reeves as a broken down mecha pilot who still thinks he has the right stuff. The mecha-action is very video game-like, but that hardly counts as a criticism for a series like this. Wisely, the animators also deliberately modeled the pilots features on Reeve’s, which should please his fans.

Replicas: Keanu Programs a Back-Up Family

Death is such a bummer. You would think scientists could solve that thorny problem. You know, those brainy eggheads, like Keanu Reeves. Yet, even he has trouble circumventing death, but he suddenly gets a big dose of motivation when his family is killed. There are a lot of philosophical issues surrounding his work that could have been explored, but instead, director Jeffrey Nachmanoff keeps the questions of life scrupulously unexamined in Replicas, which releases today on DVD and VOD.

Dr. Will Foster has been toiling away on a process to transfer the consciousness from physically dead donor specimens into a Terminator 1000-like android body, but the resulting freaks out have proved fatal. Perhaps he should remove all the mirrors from his lab. Regardless, he will start breaking rules and making inspired leaps when his wife and three children are all killed in a freak accident.

Instead, of the droid exo-skeleton, Foster realizes his crony-co-worker Ed Whittle’s cloning techniques could yield much more natural looking results. You would think he might have had this thought earlier, but whatever. Regardless, he will regrow their bodies, before transferring their extracted consciousness. The only problem is Foster needs four cloning pods to recreate his family, but Whittle only has three. Thusly begins a serious ludicrously bad, impossible to believe decisions Foster makes.

Honest to Pete, Replicas is so overwrought and over-the-top, it is weirdly entertaining, in cheesy and ironic kind of ways. Of course, we should know we are in for some awkward, unintentional humor as soon as we see Keanu Reeves playing a bio-engineering genius. Sure, we can buy into that.

Yet, he sort of works as Foster, because he is one of the best in the business when it comes to clumsy face-palm moments. They just come effortlessly to him. Even when she dies and gets resurrected, Alice Eve is dull as dishwater playing Mona Foster. However, Thomas Middleditch is an effectively incredulous audience surrogate as Whittle, who is constantly shaking his head and pulling out his hair due to frustration with Foster’s Sophie’s Choice and all his subsequent head-scratching actions.

Seriously, it is hard to believe Replicas could get made without substantial rewrites. It certainly could have used deep, character-altering revisions, but its weird misanthropic eccentricities almost make it entertaining—almost. It has to be seen to be believed, but don’t feel like you have to. Only recommended for movie riffing, Replicas releases today (4/16) on DVD and BluRay.

Siberia: Keanu Reeves Needs a Heavier Coat

It is an area famous for diamond mining and gulags. During the Soviet years, Siberia was a place of toil and misery, even if you were not a political prisoner. Development has not boomed since the technical fall of Communism, but the diamonds are still there. That is always where an ambiguously ethical American diamond dealer must go to find his missing partner and twelve fabulously expensive blue diamonds in Matthew Ross’s Siberia (trailer here), which releases today on DVD.

Lucas Hill plays it pretty fast and loose, but he has always managed to keep on the right side of the law. Unfortunately, when his partner Pyotr disappears along with the twelve stones Hill had promised to oligarch-gangster Boris Volkov, it puts him in a tricky spot. Hill’s only lead is Pyotr’s brother, who works in the Mir Mine, but he has also been out of contact for weeks.

However, all is not lost. While in Mirny, Hill meets Katya, an alluring tavern-keeper, who can immediately tell he is engaged in funny business, but doesn’t care. In fact, Hill might just be falling in love, even though he has a wife back home (but no passion). The sex might be great, but Hill will be in big trouble without those stones.

As a director-screenwriter tandem, Ross and Scott B. Smith do not inspire rapt anticipation, but there are worse pedigrees. Ross’s Frank & Lola is hardly a perfect film, but it has a distinctive vibe. Likewise, Smith’s original novel and screenplay adaptation of A Simple Plan had their gritty merit. However, their collaboration on Siberia is a crushing disappointment. The first act is deadly dull, the second act is uncomfortably mean-spirited, and the third act falls flat as a pancake. Perhaps most bafflingly, a film called Siberia has precious little to say about Russia’s Communist past or its Putinist present, aside from a few FSB agents, who show up late in the game to make everything worse.

This will no doubt be shocking to read, but Keanu Reeves is a rather stiff, inexpressive presence as Hill. To be fair, Ana Ularu (Romanian, but close enough) is spirited and seductive as Katya, but the rest of the Russians are just stock hicks or cliched gangsters, with no meaningful differentiation. It is also a crying shame to see the great German actress Veronica Ferres grossly underemployed as Raisa, the St. Petersburg hotel concierge.

Ularu deserves to get some attention for her work in Siberia, but everything else about the film is just a waste. It knows the FSB is a scary, lawless outfit, but that is all that it gets right. Not recommended, Siberia releases today on DVD.

Mifune: The Last Samurai

It is a story of a film role that got away that rivals Tom Selleck’s nearly appearing as Indiana Jones in Raiders of the Lost Ark. While the regretful Selleck was forced out by contractual obligations beyond his control, Toshiro Mifune could only blame his agent’s bad advice for turning down what would be the iconic role of Obi-won Kenobi. Yet, even without the Star Wars franchise, Mifune has attained legendary status, in great part due to his acclaimed collaborations with Akira Kurosawa. Steven Okazaki surveys the towering actor’s life and work in Mifune: The Last Samurai (trailer here), which opens this Friday in New York.

Obviously, Okazaki had a wealth of historically significant films to draw from, including arguably the greatest death scene ever in Kurosawa’s loose Macbeth adaptation, Throne of Blood. He also found some tremendously illustrative photos, such as the montage of sports cars Mifune wrecked during hard-drinking benders. The working class Mifune essentially fell in acting almost accidentally, but he became the top Japanese box-office draw of his era and one of its most exportable movie stars.

Unfortunately, Mifune acted on a lot of dubious advice during his post-Kurosawa career, particularly a studio boss’s counsel to start his own production company. When times got tough, Mifune was forced into television work to keep his company afloat. None of the footage Okazaki shows from this period will look familiar to most American Mifune fans. It might be a huge step down from his Kurosawa classics, but it is Mifune we haven’t seen—and evidently there is a great deal of it.

Steven Spielberg would probably only talk about 1941 to pay tribute to Mifune, but he does indeed discuss directing the actor in one of his least regarded films. We also hear from Mr. Movie Documentary himself, Martin Scorsese, as well as Mifune’s son Shirô, and Haruo Nakajima, a contemporary now most closely associated with the Godzilla franchise. Kôji Yakusho, perhaps the closest contemporary heir to Mifune’s gruff leading man mantle also provides some context. However, the most endearing moments are spent with the great-in-her-own-right Kyôko Kagawa, who regrets not having the opportunity to play a late-in-life Marigold Hotel-style romance with her co-star from High and Low, The Bad Sleep Well, and Red Beard.

Last Samurai is a classy film that is so unflaggingly respectful, its interview subjects often speak in the hushed tones typically used in church pews and the like. Keanu Reeves’ narration is crystal clear, but sometimes borders on the reverent. Yet, Okazaki and his interview subjects deal forthrightly with Mifune’s conspicuous but readily forgivable character flaws. Most tellingly, the doc puts viewers in the mood to binge watch several dozen Mifune films, which suggests it is ultimately quite effective. Highly recommended for all fans of classic cinema, Mifune: The Last Samurai opens this Friday (11/25) in New York, at the IFC Center.

Refn’s Neon Demon

These models have practically zero percent body fat, but they can still produce plenty of body horror. That’s “horror,” as in scary movies. If you’re looking for vicarious thrills and chills, a Nicolas Winding Refn joint really isn’t for you, but if you want to gawk at lurid strangeness, the Danish director delivers more than ever. There are indeed dire consequences in store for a small town catwalk ingénue, who descends into the darkly sexualized, increasingly surreal fashion world in Refn’s Neon Demon (trailer here), which opens this Friday in New York.

Fresh off the bus from Bumbletucky or wherever, Jesse immediately falls in with Ruby, a conspicuously interested lesbian makeup artist and her two evil blonde model pals, Gigi and Sarah—or is it Sarah and Gigi? Much to her new model frienemies’ shock, Jesse is immediately signed by a high-power agency and starts booking what they consider “their gigs.” Her boss admits she is raw and undeveloped, but she just has “the Look.”

Within the context of the narrative (such as it is), Elle Fanning’s Jesse is a sixteen-year-old not really passing for nineteen. However, she looks like a fourteen-year-old zonked out on Nyquil. If that “Look” revs your engine, you should probably be on some sort of registry.

Regardless, guys seem to swoon over her like she is the second coming of Marilyn Monroe. That includes the loyal Dean, who follows her around like a neutered hound dog and Hank, the predatory junkyard dog who manages the fleabag Pasadena motel she is still staying in after being signed to a modelling contract by Mad Men’s Christine Hendricks, one of the few women in the film who does not look like a malnourished heroin addict.

There is some creepy tension and some bat-scat lunacy in Neon, but there are also plenty scenes fixated on Jesse as she bites her lip and stares into her navel. Frankly, it is about a focused as Only God Forgives (meaning not very), but it lacks the electrifying presence of Vithaya Pansringarm. Perversely, it is Keanu Reeves who makes the strongest impression as Hell’s own Motelier. He is so unsettling, Refn should have called an audible and rearranged the film into a more conventional Bates Motel-style horror movie.

Refn being Refn, he frequently bombards the audience with barrages of tripped out imagery. Some of it is admittedly quite weird and original, but the film needs a more solid foundation for his regurgitated subconscious to wash over. It is just not enough to be subversive and out there. There also needs to be a there there. Not recommended, Neon Demon opens this Friday (6/24) in New York, at the Angelika Film Center.

Sundance ’15: Knock Knock

Eli Roth digs Chile and they dig him back. He’s like Hasselhoff over there, so its not surprising he shoehorned in some Chilean references, shot in Chile (Santiago doubling for the Hollywood Hills) and featured two Chilean actresses (one being his wife, Lorenza Izzo) in his latest film. However, the love affair might end once they get a load of his new psycho-sexual home invasion thriller, Knock Knock (trailer here), which premiered at the 2015 Sundance Film Festival.

Evan Webber is an architect and a committed family man, but he still remembers his glory days as a DJ. He is home alone working on a commission while his artist wife and kids spend the weekend at the beach. Unfortunately, Webber’s dope smoking is soon interrupted by a fateful knock at the door. That will be Genesis and Bel Who, two party girl flight attendants who got lost in the rain looking for a friend’s bash. At least that is their initial story.

As Webber lets them in to dry off, they start flirting hard. Honestly, flirting is not a strong enough term. They practically wrestle him to the ground and have their way with him. Yet, the opening act is surprisingly effective pitting his awkward attempts at evasion against their sexed-up seduction techniques. There is a sly give-and-take or ebb-and-flow to this first half hour or so, but unfortunately it is completely jettisoned once Webber inevitably succumbs to temptation.

From here on out, Genesis and Bel become moralizing fatal attractions, who declare Webber must pay for his transgressions. Suddenly, Webber is fighting for his life and the well-being of his family, but he never stands a chance. The ladies just keeping beating him down at every turn. Perhaps this constitutes some sort of subversive feminist statement, but as dramatic arcs go, it is pretty darn flat.

One of the biggest disappointments of Knock Knock is the speed bump it drops in front of the Keanu Reeves comeback express. Everyone primed for more badassery after John Wick and Man of Tai Chi, will be let down by this Nic Cage-ish turn. Let’s face it, we don’t want to watch Reeves losing his cool. We want him to be silent, but violent. Still, Izzo and Ana de Armas are sufficiently ferocious and they look good soaking wet, so at least they keep their end up, in exploitation terms.

Knock Knock is largely based on-inspired by the 1977 cult exploiter Death Game, which featured producer Colleen Camp and executive producer Sondra Locke tormenting Seymour Cassel, so there is precedent for everything that feels like a misfire. It is a bit of a departure for Roth, but despite the lack of gore, it still really doesn’t work. It is all cat-toying-with-the-mouse with no promise of table-turning to keep things interesting. Regardless of its shortcomings, Knock Knock was picked up by Lionsgate, so expect to hear more from it following its midnight screenings at this year’s Sundance Film Festival.

Man of Tai Chi: Keanu Reeves and Tiger Chen Show Their Chops

It was Tiger Chen who really knew kung fu.  He was the stuntman responsible for Keanu Reeves’ martial arts training during the production of the Matrix trilogy and he made quite an impression.  For his directorial debut, Reeves introduces Chen to the world with his old school beatdown, Man of Tai Chi (trailer here), which opens this Friday in New York.

“Tiger” Chen Lin-hu is the last student of Master Yang, a great Ling Kong Tai Chi teacher.  In contemporary Beijing, Tai Chi is mostly associated with old men doing their “soft” qigong in the park.  However, Chen is starting to get noticed in the above board MMA world for his traditional “hard” practice of the ancient discipline.  He also catches the eye of the shadowy Donaka Mark.  When shady developers conveniently threaten to condemn his master’s temple, the lowly deliveryman becomes easy prey for Mark’s overtures. 

Initially, Chen truly does not understand what he is getting involved in.  However, as he notches victories in Mark’s underground fight circuit, Chen starts to enjoy the money and adrenaline.  Unfortunately, the matches make him more aggressive, jeopardizing his relationships with his master and Qingsha, the cute-as-a-button paralegal helping him save the temple. Nonetheless, he cannot help noticing the stakes escalate with each bout. 

Hong Kong police captain Sun Jing-si knows where it all leads: fights to the death broadcast over secure online connections for Mark’s exclusive clientele.  Always a step behind the malevolent mastermind, she needs an informant to take the place of the one Mark just killed, someone like Chen, if she can find him.

With Tai Chi, Reeves had the good sense to make a film he would enjoy for his maiden directorial outing.  Frankly, he shows serious action helmer chops, staging fight sequences that are crystal clear and easy to follow.  There are no barrages of close-ups here.  Reeves gives us the full Fred Astaire body shots, precisely so we can appreciate the technique of his main man, Chen.

The results are convincing.  While Tai Chi is not the most original narrative under the sun, it deliberately harkens back to the gritty low budgets classics that launched the careers of legends.  Chen maybe is not the most expressive actor you will ever see (after all, Reeves is his thesp-mentor), but his earnest gee-whiz persona works well in the context of the film.  Oddly enough, Reeves is a bit of a surprise here, making a dynamite villain with his piercing stare and apparently insatiable appetite for the scenery around him.

Karen Mok is also seriously hardnosed as Sun, bringing real supporting heft to the film.  Simon Yam adds further HK action cred as Superintendent Wong, her suspiciously unhelpful superior.  Qing Ye is not exactly a natural on-screen either, but she still represents Chen’s lost innocence rather effectively.  Yet for genre fans, nobody tops Shaolin veteran Yu Hai, doing his thing with stately gravitas as Master Yang.  Bizarrely though, The Raid’s Iko Uwais is completely wasted in a mere tease of a cameo.

Reeves might not be Clint Eastwood’s successor as the next great actor-director, but Tai Chi is a pretty slick calling card.  If need be, he should easily find a second career as a straight-to-DVD action director, which is considerably higher praise than it sounds (those cats actually have to be good).  Likewise, Chen might not be the next Daniel Day-Lewis, but watching him kicking butt is hugely entertaining.  Way better than you think, Man of Tai Chi is recommended for martial arts fans and Karen Mok admirers when it opens this Friday (11/1) in New York.

Tribeca ’12: Side By Side

Photochemical film is having its Buggles moment. It has been killed by digital video, but the death rattle is not quite over yet. While some holdouts still shoot the old school way, digital has steadily become the norm. The aesthetic and economic implications of this sea change in motion picture production are explored in Chris Kenneally’s Side By Side (trailer here), which screens during this year’s Tribeca Film Festival.

If you think Martin Scorsese might have something to say about this moment in cinema history, you would be correct. He is one of small army of directors and cinematographers interviewed by co-producer and on-screen host Keanu Reeves. While Scorsese has mixed emotions, George Lucas is all in for digital, while Christopher Nolan stubbornly clings to his photochemical film. To oversimplify the debate, digital is cheaper and more easily manipulated, whereas film has more dynamic character, in much the same way vinyl favorably compares to digital music.

Side By Side gives a brisk and lucid overview of the development of digital technology and its rise from the domain of slacker indies to 3D tent-poles. Most of the interview subjects are exactly the sort of experts one would want to hear from, including David Lynch, Lars von Trier, Danny Boyle (whose Oscar-winning Slumdog Millionaire was a digital watershed), and both Wachowskis, as well as top flight cinematographers such as Vilmos Zsigmond and Vittorio Storaro.

However, it is impossible to ignore the snickering that erupts whenever a filmmaking giant prefaces an answer with: “Well Keanu, I’ll tell you. . .” Poor Reeves. He actually seems like an okay guy when he explains some of the Matrix effects to a young extra on the set of his upcoming 47 Ronin. He just has a certain presence and persona at odds with his on-screen role here.

Kenneally, Reaves, and company demystify a lot of the technical process, without losing sight of cinema as a form of artistic (hopefully) storytelling. As one would expect, every point is generously illustrated with clips from classic films. Some traditionalists might regret a more spirited defense was not mounted on behalf of photochemical film. Still, as it stands, Side By Side is an informative and rather entertaining look at the state of movie-making, considerably superior to the recent National Film Registry documentary, These Amazing Shadows. Recommended for those who enjoy movies about movies, Side By Side screens this coming Tuesday (4/24), Thursday (4/26), Friday (4/27), and Saturday (4/28) as part of the 2012 Tribeca Film Festival now running in New York.