Life is rough for kids these days. On one hand, they can trick sites like ours into thinking they're old enough to watch videos of magnificently violent M-rated titles like Splinter Cell: Conviction. But actually convincing a retail store to sell them a copy means they're either borrowing their father's tuxedo and mustache, or bribing a homeless guy with beer money.

So how can children everywhere experience the thrill of stealth-killing a Third Echelon soldier in the dead of night? With the Splinter Cell Activity Book for Kids, of course!