Sur La Mer (our 31st Anniversary): Part 22: 3,365 Miles To Boston

3994

The longest road in America has one end in Oregon, in Newport. It goes by many local names across the width of the State: SW 4th Avenue in Ontario, NE Greenwood Avenue in Bend, Main Street in Sweet Home and Lebanon, SE Santiam Blvd in Albany, SW Philomath Blvd in Corvallis, and Main Street again in Philomath. 

When it enters Newport, it becomes East Olive Street before it ends at Hwy 101. If you're in the mind to wander down a long road, though, there's a sign there that invites you to try:

In the interests of symmetry, there's a similar sign at the other end of the road: Kenmore Square, Boston, near Fenway Park, has a sign that will tell you it's 3,365 miles to Newport, Oregon.

We're fair that way in America.

A-1 Truck Parts? Just Look For the Sign of the ...

3803

On our way back from Kelley Point late that day, we decided to course down North Columbia Boulevard. Most of Columbia Boulevard is industrial, and out near the Columbia/Burgard/Lombard Tee, you ad the remote feeling as well; even though you're merely a loud shout from Saint Johns, it hides behind a rise, so one, not having told it was there, wouldn't know that it was.

And it was in this section of Columbia Boulevard that we saw the niftiest thing we've seen in rather a while:

9609 N. Columbia Blvd, Portland. At Your Service.

Guess what they sell there. Guess. Goooooo ahead ...

Right. Girl Scout Cookies and Amway SA8 laundry soap. I knew  I couldn't fool you people.

Coolest thing is to look at it from the end. It's then you can tell, without mistaking, that they sliced the outer few inches from each side of a light truck and stuck them together which is pretty creative, the more one thinks about it. And an awful good show, too. 

[pdx_liff] Welcome To Portland. Please Drive Tenderly.

3441.

Seen late Sunday night, eastbound on E Burnside St, just coming up to the Laurelhurst gateway at E. 32nd Avenue:

I'd never seen that one before.

Now, I know heartbreak is different for everyone. But what's just ahead is Portland's legendary Music Millenninum store (as called out by the sign), and just beyond the traffic signal, deepest, darkest Laurelhurst. I don't see how MM is anything like a heartbreak, but Laurelhurst may be one if interest rates are your monkey.

I do know that "Danger Heartbreak Dead Ahead" is the title of a hit pop music single first interpreted by the Marvelettes in October 1965, but just because it's just down the street from MM, that must be coincidence.

Still, drive tenderly, Portlanders. The love you save may be your own. And buckle up.

[signs] No Alien Abductions Allowed Between 9PM and 6AM? Good To Know, Zendak

2179.Although it occurs to me than any ET with the chutzpah to actually abduct humans from earth probably don't bother too much with local Earth laws:

Original from here, a Russian web site about something
somehow, I don't know, I don't know any Russian.
via Twitterer http://twitter.com/mynameisorman

Although they might be sporting enough to just obey the local custom, just out of being sporting and being ET mensch and like that. I mean, just how's the constable supposed to cite the offender? That might be a bit outside our tech level.

So at least the locals can get some sleep at nights, but after 6AM – watch it, Charlie, 'cos here comes Zendak, and he's lonely!

Technorati Tags: signs, funny signs, funny warning signs, funny road signs

George Of The Jungle Would Ignore This Warning Sign

2028.One of the most awesome yellow diamond warning signs ever can be found in Tualatin, on Southwest Sagert Street, about one block east of Southwest Boones Ferry Road. And here it is:



These signs are necessary because Tualatin really loves its trees. An intersection on Southwest Avery Street, not too far away, has a Heritage Tree in it, and was designed around it. This particular tree (which you can see in the distance there) just protrudes into the right-of-way.

If you go up closer:



You get a very good idea of why that sign looked the way it did. But that little tree on it (made maybe of a couple of arrowheads) is just so full of awesome, it hurts.

Technorati Tags: Funny Signs, Warning Diamonds, Sign Design, Teh Funnay, Sagert Street, Tualatin

J. Alfred Proofreader, On The Road

2010.My favorite public copy editor, J. Alfred Proofreader, has taken his yellow pen and used it to improve road signs in his own back yard:

Photo credit J. Alfred Proofreader; all rights remain
with creator

Putting TEANFLY over TEANECK scans well, I admit, but even I know it's Tenafly. J. Alfred's blog has a nice little bit of history on the place; I found it quite enlightening and interesting.

I remember that we had very visible signs announcing the Morriosn Bridge over SE Grand Avenue and a exit sign for Hanies St. over I-5 once. Sadly, I did not have a digital camera then.

And so it goes.

What Happens When Matt Davis Gets Vexed And Ratty

1992.While I'm reluctant to read anything into anyone else's work that's not obvious (oh, well, okay, I'm not actually), I'm guessing that the our favorite PMerc reporter finds a certain debate a little wearying (warning before you click that link – there's a bad word therein).

I've stolen the graphic and Bowdlerized it a bit so that the kiddies can see it:



(two offending letters were left smeared a bit just so you know they were there)

Technorati Tags: Made In Oregon Sign, PDX Landmarks, Portland, Liff In Portland, Satire

The New Greatest Warning Diamond EVER

1991.In Number 1981, I shared what I thought was the greatest yellow warning diamond sign ever. It looked like this:

John B, over at the local blog Sellwood Street, went me better. I bow the greatness and the awesomeness of this sign (link is to the actual photo as per John's comment in 1981; it's a biggie):

(photo nicked from JohnB's blog, Sellwood Street.
JohnB retains all rights to this photo)

The sheer awesomness of this warning diamond floors me. MAX tracks, not one but two street names (N Thompson St is about a block ahead, so you're giving trucks adavnce warning), and building lines ... it's a map in and of itself!

Mad props to JohnB, and thanks for me mention of my blog on yours. I return the favor.

Technorati Tags: Warning signs, road signs, sign design, information design, funny signs, interesting signs, PDX Street Scenes

Greatest Railroad Crossing Warning Diamond EVER

1981.Now, Portland is no stranger to funny warning signs, as any bicyclist who rides near the Portland Streetcar tracks will tell you.

But is there anything for the truck driver with a truck with a long trailer who made the unwise decision of turning down that backroad-bit of NE Cully Blvd between NE Columbia Blvd and Portland Hwy?

No, you think?

Think again:

Whoa, that's pretty – well, graphic. Let's take a closer look:

Now, picture that you're the truck driver that ignored this warning. Awkward. Awkward.

Technorati Tags: Funny Signs, warning signs, Portland Photos, NE Cully Blvd, NE Columbia Blvd