In Search of Lost Innocence

Guess what? The time now is 15:02. I am quite bored at work, thus this entry. Just rushed finished the closing, and feeling kind of empty now. Its like a routinal intense battle every month end, with surprising cock-ups to handle. Woo. I just love these unpredictable changes. Marshall and Corinna are leaving today, and Kelly is feeling kind of down, but I guess it would be worse when the 3 of us leave too. I have been dragging myself half-heartedly to work lately, might be due to the same reason too. Had been pondering over the next few weeks when Corinna is gone, and wondering how am I going to face the onslaught. Haha. Of course, I ain't really working for the company, and I am sure Aloysius & Wei Chuan know the reason pretty well. I probably won't leave until Kelly does, which I think she won't till at least June. At least I am occupied with something and earning my keep. Settling hand phone bills and expenses aren't easy tasks. I guess Aloysius will be having a ...

Courtesy of Chong Ying, again. Here's this nice song to share. With Me by Sum 41 I don't want this moment to ever end Where everythings nothing without you I'll wait here forever just to, to see you smile 'Cause it's true, I am nothing without you Through it all, I made my mistakes I stumble and fall, but I mean these words I want you to know With everything I won't let this go, these words are my heart and soul I'll hold on to this moment you know, 'as I bleed my heart out to show And I won't let go Thoughts read unspoken, forever in doubt Pieces of memories fall to the ground I know what I didn't have so, I won't let this go 'Cause it's true, I am nothing without you All the streets where I walked alone, with nowhere to go I've come to an end I want you to know With everything I won't let this go, these words are my heart and soul I'll hold on to this moment you know, 'as I bleed my heart out to show And I won't...

By Wei Yen's request, I have decided to write about the impromptu BBQ we had last Sunday. Khong Chin and Shu Hui suddenly had the urge to BBQ some stuffs, and so we are off to East Coast for a mini-BBQ session. Obviously, Wei Yen and I are playing the gooseberries. That's Khong Chin in the driving seat. He just got his driving licence recently, and I would say his driving isn't that bad. Just that he tends to dash across red lights, miss out some road signs, and neglect some motorists. Well, nothing much I guess. Haha. This shows exactly how we BBQ using an aluminium tray, on the sand by the beach. I think its quite romantic and interesting to carry out BBQ by the beach. And what's more, is that you will never get any other chance to sit so close to burning charcoal. It's a once in a lifetime experience, and probably you wouldn't want a repeat of that. Haha. The BBQ was a rather budgeted one, but I guess we enjoyed the company and lame jokes that we cracked. So ...

Its hasn't been the best of weeks so far since I started work. I am rather exhausted by repeated late nights and packed schedules. There are two 21st birthday celebration coming up, I guess its time to spend some money. Well, my officer(not SAF) has tendered resignation lately, and it has created waves of unrest within the other staffs. I still feel unjust for her, to be treated unfairly by a unappreciative boss. Oh wells, that's how the corporate world exist as I guess. A few others are already thinking of following her footsteps though, and soon it might be me. Well, as long as Kelly still remains in the company, I will stick with her until I can't. Haha. I have been offered another contract though, a higher paying one, but that would mean more job and responsibilities to come. Making myself commit to these tough promises will literally kill me. And now the boss wants her to do closing by the day she leaves the company, which is next Wednesday. Irregardless of halting the...

I don't know where to pick up from where I last left here. Seemed that a lot of stuffs happened last week, but I guess the hype is no longer there to talk about it anymore. Apparently, my whole department is plotting a revolution. Haha. We shall see what happens after that. Oh, and I went to NTU for checkup on Thursday. Leng was nice enough to spare some time to meet me for a meal despite her busy studying schedule. I tried to contact a few others though, but I thought I would be ok alone. Chong Ying, not that I didnt thought of contacting you, but your MSN nick was too scary the day before. Speaking of which, we ( HSS: Humanities & Social Sciences ) seemed to be misunderstood in a wrong light and often stereotyped to be amazingly brave to deviate from the normal paths others tend to follow. Maybe its the pragmatism of Singapore's society that forces people to think this way, but our future prospects aren't as enticing compared to engineers or accountants. But I shan...

Today was another basketball session at NYJC. Xie Qiang came, after missing out on quite a few occasions. The girls didn't come though, probably busy with studying for their exams that are coming up. On leaving, Leslie suddenly commented on the lion emblem that symbolises our school. "Since when did the lion become so fierce?" Haha. I can't help but be amused at how that comment came about. And really, taking a closer look, its true. This lion has its teeth showing and asserting a growling-like stance. Haha. Back then, that lion used to be much 'friendlier'. Haha. Oh wells, I guess competition between JC is extremely intense and having a fiercer emblem kind of helps during competitions. I have been reading up Hardwarezone Forums for a breather during work, and I have found funny stuffs there. Be it the National Service Knowledge thread or the Current Issues Lounge, they are quite entertaining and interesting. One thread I saw, its about the suicidal case at C...

Sad things aside, last Tuesday was our CASTAWAY outing yet again! This time, the 6 of us were united back once again and with an addition of a new intern, Shi Qin. Haha. We wanted to go steamboat at Marina Bay then followed by bowling after that. Unfortunately, we had no idea that Marina Bay has closed down all of its steamboat shops! Luckily for us, Hui Juan told me in the nick of time while we were chatting online and hence we decided to head down to Marina Square instead. Anyway, thanks, Hui Juan. =) (I know you want this, right?) Went down to Yuki Yaki. Its the first time I've been there, and I think its ok only. Haha. Its a steamboat and BBQ buffet style dinner there, with an ice-cream DIY buffet too. Haha. They had fun playing with the ice cream, I just sat down, scooping and eating their hard work. Haha. We took a few pictures though, I haven't gotten all of them, and I will send it to you guys once I got hold of them. This a picture of the 4 of us, temporary staffs at C...

I am back. Its has really been a week of high and low tides, and words can't simply describe them all. Today's the one of the few days I felt completely beaten and overwhelmed with despair and despise. Exposed down to my bare vulnerable innate self, where I felt helpless and all those confidence that I once had seemed to have dissipated into thin air. I always thought I had a nice EQ , where I have no problems understanding people, consoling them when they are down and even providing them with adequate and substantial advices. But today, I couldn't do a single thing. On one hand, I was beaten by the fact that my last-ditched efforts were seemingly ineffective, and in the midst of recovering from that disappointment, I couldn't gather the strength and confidence I usually have to help someone dear to me in need. All I could do, was sit and listen to her sobbing, while another friend was talking to her. I wanted to do something, I tried, but I don't know how. Somehow ...

Calendar Girl by Stars If I am lost for a day Try to find me But if I don't come back then I won't look behind me And all of the things that I thought were so easy Just got harder and harder each day December is darkest In june there's the light But this empty bedroom Won't make anything right While out on the landing A friend I forgot to send home Who waits up for me All through the night Calendar girl who's in love with the world Stay alive! I dreamed I was dying as I so often do and when I awoke I was sure it was true I ran to the window threw my head to the sky And said whoever is up there Please don't let me die But I can't live forever I can't always be One day I'll be sand on a beach by the sea The pages keep turning I mark off each day with a cross and I'll laugh about all that we've lost Calendar girl Who is lost to the world Stay alive Calendar girl who is lost to the world Stay alive! January, February, March, April, May I'm a...

I thought I should keep happy thoughts on this blog, hence, I shall vent my grumbles elsewhere. I followed Aloysius & Wei Chuan to East Coast park on yesterday to have a feel of how Remote Controlled car racing is like. I didn't know that there were so many RC enthusiasts out there. You see people willing to spend half a thousand to obtain and modify their cars to their liking. Haha. Its an expensive hobby though, although I think it would be nice to have you fix yourself a customised car and actually see it moving. Haha. I can somewhat understand this satisfaction, being a Gundam model lover myself. But I probably won't take it up due to its high costs, so Aloysius, you will have to try harder. Went to play soccer with Aloysius and gang. Tired and burnt. Routinal weekend. I wonder what will I be doing tomorrow.

I was completely drained out at work today. I didn't even talk much. Having too many late nights is killing me. Haha. On top of that, I still have to cope with the closing of the accounts. I need a break from everything. Anyway, the few of us went to send Wai Kit off at Changi Airport Terminal 3 last night. Haha. It's my first time at T3, and I tell you that place is really spacious and classy. Haha. I didn't really explore the whole place though, but probably I will when I am bored or emo. Well, the feeling isn't good knowing that you won't be able to see a friend for quite some time. And someone mentioned that gatherings will never be the same again. Oh wells, I guess we can still make something out of it. Haha. And what's more, Christopher is going next, in June. We didn't make him cry though, thought that it would be bad to do so. We weren't that daring enough either. Well, its all the best to him in Melbourne! He will be back in a few months' ti...