In Search of Lost Innocence

Shit. I just spent hundreds of dollars in a day. Worst spending ever. Haha. But I am glad I bought stuffs at a discount. With the Great Singapore Sale around the corner, or rather arrived, the few of us went out to see if there was anything we could snap home. Actually, we only wanted to get a soccer ball, due to the fact that Alex kicked it into the monsoon canal last week, and we need another one to play.. Haha.. But we ended up buying other things as well.. Si Jun and I got shoes while Wei Yen got a badminton racket.. Haha.. Went in search of a 'team jersey'. There isn't really a team, its just an excuse to get a common jersey and look 'cooler'. Searched the whole of Queensway and Peninsula Shopping Centre.. Haha.. I think we will get to wear it soon.. Headed over to Suntec in view of the IT Fair that was going on. In addition, Leng was there, and Si Jun had the 'urge' to see her.. So we went. In the end, I bought a camera.. Haha.. I think it was a rather...

Changed a bit of blog's layout. Now it includes lyrics of the songs that are being played on my blog. Haha.. Back from a tiring week. Did guard duty on Sunday, and the following Monday was Instructors' Preparation Course. Its to prepare us instructors for the upcoming courses. Was rather exhausted due to the lack of sleep, but oh well, I survived through it. You know, in the army, there aren't definite good or bad guys. Unlike schools or in dramas, there isn't really a clear line drawn between the two extremes. That's probably the case in the outside society too. Everyone in this organisation is fighting for their own survival; their own livelihood. There are all kinds of tactics people can use to climb up the corporate ladder, from the dignified and honourable method to the lowdown and underhand means.. But their main purpose behind all these actions is roughly similar. There are people who dislike the army so much, but yet couldn't afford to leave the organisa...

Leave Out All The Rest by Linkin Park I dreamt I was missing You were so scared But no one would listen Cause no one else cared After my dreaming I woke with this fear What am I leaving When I'm done here So if you're asking me I want you to know When my time comes Forget the wrong that I've done Help me leave behind some Reasons to be missed And don't resent me And when you're feeling empty Keep me in your memory Leave out all the rest Leave out all the rest Don't be afraid I've taken my beating I've shared what I've been I'm strong on the surface Not all the way through I've never been perfect But neither have you So if you're asking me I want you to know When my time comes Forget the wrong that I've done Help me leave behind some Reasons to be missed Don't resent me And when you're feeling empty Keep me in your memory Leave out all the rest Leave out all the rest Forgetting All the hurt inside You've learned to hide so ...

Finally its the end of the PS course. And I am out again, this time earlier due to half day off. Its was a rather sad moment to see your course mates leave you once again during passing out. This kind of separation just makes you feel teary. Well, I guess its time to move on with life. I didn't do very well for the course in overall.. Or rather one of the last few. Won't try to explain much, you guys probably won't understand it anyway.. But just a question to ponder about... Does integrity still exists in this World today? I just withstood a test of it this week. Will be doing Guard duty this Sunday. My uncle is still in hospital.

Just heard some comments from Patrick about my trainees that have recently passed out as Sergeants. Its damn saddening to know that they are still acting as kids. Their judgement and common sense are just not there. Even though you people are forced into the army, can you please carry out your work with pride? I f*cking despise people who just whine and grumble about their misfortunes but do nothing at all but expect people to alleviate their sufferings for them, like the whole World owes them a hell lot. Why can't they just face up to life and live it with dignity? At least you die with honour. Felt ashamed just to recall the fact that these bunch of ingratful and arrogant kids who are aged 22~24 passed out under my charge as an instructor. Everything we did was just didn't pay off, and was taken for granted. In the army, you will really see all sorts of humans. Well, when the next batch of trainees come in, I will be a different man. I promise.

Woke up in the late morning. Feeling damn tired.. Supposedly having a soccer match this coming Wednesday back in camp with our arch rivals. OTW. Haha. But you know, I don't have proper footwear.. So maybe have to go and buy. Haix. Suddenly thought of what Ching Si said to me yesterday. We were talking about the SYF held on Friday a week ago. CS: "Aiya, I very disappointed in the judging. I felt that some bands don't deserve their respective awards." Me: "Hmmm, I won't know. I haven't been listening to band music, or rather bands playing 'live', so I doubt I can tell much." CS: "Haha. Aiya, you cannot tell already la, not in band so long.. Dun bother bout band stuff le.. Forget band la, a bit pointless for you now." Me: "......." Don't know what he meant by asking me to forget band. Then again, on a separate event, Si Jun and I suddenly talked about Chun Ji. For those who don't know things about him and me, we are o...

Went to play soccer with the usual gang in the morning.. This time, Shane came along. I knew Shane back in NYJC when he was in the school council and one of Alvyn's best friends. Thereafter, I went to the same BMTC company, Raven, as him.. Haha.. Well, I don't know him very well, but good enough to count as a friend. Trying not to lose momentum, we went out to Cineleisure to try out the dart machine recommended by Alex.. Haha.. It was quite lame though, but it ended up in laughter.. Went for pool too, at Paradiz Centre. Ate Subway there, kind of feel that the ingredients used there aren't as fresh as other outlets.. Haha.. Maybe its just me. It was a surprise that I managed to catch a glimpse of a someone from my class with a partner. Haha... Anyway, today is Yee Wen's birthday, and the kiddy juniors are celebrating it at Marina Bay.. So hereby wishes you all the best in your studies and hope you get into the university you want soon. Had a surprise call from Jeremy. Di...

I am getting used to the kind of response my class gives when we tries to meet up. Haha.. Perhaps we should only see each other when we get married next time. If not, forget it. Had a very tough week. Started PS course on Monday.. The whole course was so packed and demanding, in terms of performance.. Basically, the few of us couldn't participate much in the discussions outfield as we don't know stuff about how the vocation works. Its like a crash course for the few of us.. Coming to the integrity part, a few people cheated in the test as they re-took the test after viewing at the answers and claimed full marks for themselves.. Oh well, all kind of people exist. Ran 9 km today. Wasn't very good. But at least I completed it. Humiliated today. Exhausted. Leave me alone.

Finally, I have reached the end of my leave.. Haha.. Will be going back tonight. Just went to watch Spiderman 3 with Xiao Hui, Sok Fong, Leslie and De Shun.. Haha.. Vivocity was rather packed.. Haha.. The movie wasn't too bad but also wasn't like what I expected.. But its good having a chance to meet up with them.. Haha.. And seriously having doubts about what is going to happen next Saturday.. Got to book back to camp soon..

A story I got from an e-mail some time back: A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates. You may visit the store ONLY ONCE ! There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch... you may choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building! So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 - These men have jobs and love the Lord. The second floor sign reads:Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids. The third floor sign reads:Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids, and are extremely good looking. "Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads: Floor 4 - These men have jobs...

Just felt like changing the skin, and I got a one. Haha. I think its quite girly though. Who cares. I like. Oh no, I am turning gay.

Blogger is still cocked up. Haha.. Wondering when it will get back to place. Went to watch Singapore Youth Festival Central Judging of Junior College Bands today. Woke up early in the morning and queued at SCH for the tickets.. Hmmm.. Its was very crowded, and as usual the situation there was chaotic. The marshallers were have a tough time trying gain control over the crowd and smoothening the traffic... Well, I met some familar faces.. Christopher, Kiong Wee, Jun Yang, Joel, Tze Hao and Mark Wang.. Haha.. Quite a lot of people in one day.. Somewhere going back there to listen to the bands make you re-live the past.. Here are some of the results: Gold With Honours: ACJC, SAJC, VJC Gold: NYJC, HCJC, CJC, TJC, NJC, RJC, MJC Silver: SRJC, TPJC, PJC, YJC, AJC, JJC Well, feeling good for the NYJC band people and congratulate them for attaining a Gold award.. Haha.. Feels kind of weird when you didn't get it yourself. But they have a dominating strength of 72 people, and a new conductor....

I think blogger is seriously having problems. Haha. Met Wei Qi and Irene today. Went for supper with Wei Qi.. She seems quite busy in her life now.. Haha.. Serious conversation we had. Haha. Fierce. Looking forward to SYF competition tomorrow. And perhaps what Wei Qi said will come true.

Went for my God mum's weekly cell group meeting.. Wasn't very enthusiastic about it at first.. But I was invited graciously by them, and I have to oblige with them.. It was quite a good experience, although I was feeling awkward with all the prayers and songs but the experience sharing session was quite beneficial. To top it off, we celebrated my God dad's birthday and Mothers' Day in advance.. 慈父孽败子. One phrase I learnt tonight. Its is about how protecting and pampering one's child and giving them the best of everything may actually prove otherwise, if not managed under proper control. Took my God family picture today. My god sister's hair is like the one from her Guinea Pig in the kitchen. Haha.

There seems be a little problem with blogger nowadays.. Probably due to the influx of new bloggers.. Haha. I don't know.. Just went to visit my Uncle in Tan Tock Seng Hospital.. His condition seems to have worsened.. I also don't know what to say. Was taken aback when I saw many elderly in the wards.. I should have expected that, but somewhat the scene is very disturbing.. Sad. Went to watch "200 Pound Beauty" with Sharon.. She is still the old and cheerful her.. We seriously got common thinking.. Its no wonder we can confide in each other well.. Haha.. Its been some time since I last saw her.. Had dinner at Cineleisure's Long John Silver outlet. The place is damn bloody cold.. Haha.. Its freezing in there.. Can't even hold the fork and knife properly.. Anyway, the show is quite nice.. Talks about the conflicts in plastic surgery, the debate about good looking over character.. And how one girl is willing to go under the knife for someone she loves.. Haha.. Its...

Woke up in the morning feeling lost.. Haha.. Don't know what to do all of a sudden.. Went to meet up with Leslie and John for lunch at Kovan.. Xie Qiang, Kelvin Lim and Zheng Yu all 'pang seh' us.. Haha.. In the end, we also went back to the same western food stall to consume our lunch.. Its has been some time since I met the both of them, and I guess they are still the normal self, grumbling about their work including me as well.. Life is seriously tough as a Specialist.. You don't get into recognition for what you do, instead you are scrutinised closely for any errors.. Just like what they say, don't be the meat patty that is used for the hamburger.. Haha.. Trapped in between the top and the bottom.. When you work, nobody cares, when you rest, everybody stares. At least now, there is a glimpse of what is going to happen on 19th May.. And now we are going to watch movie on this coming Sunday... Cause Xiao Hui is flying off, hence we must value the time before she f...

Even though its been the holidays for most of the girls, and mid year break for some of the guys.. Its still quite tough to meet up.. Maybe Leslie is right.. I am the only one who is still not disillusioned.. I should come to my senses.. Maybe there is no need to meet up with people you might not have to meet again.. Maybe you people will most probably won't meet each other again.. But if that's really what you guys think, then I have nothing to say.. But I guess its the busy schedules that make things difficult.. Efforts to pull people together ain't easy you know? Cause there is a lot of rejection to face up to.. Haix.. Warning: Don't continue reading, random bullshits along the way. Maybe things should just go on with flow of society, and there shall be no efforts to improve things. One person's effort ain't enough for everything.. Humans are scared of difficulties, they might do anything in the World just to avoid there.. Its getting too practical out there....

My computer crashed early in the morning.. I do not know the exact cause but apparently the file to boot up the system was gone.. Haix.. Spent the whole morning fixing it up.. And here I am, with no songs and everything.. Must be retribution.. Haha.. Went for dinner in town.. Was supposed to meet up with Jasmine and her boyfriend together with Fang and Leng, instead she 'pang seh' us and went to watch movie with him.. -.- Leng came from Boon Lay and Fang came straight from work.. Haix.. But nonetheless, it was a great dinner with both of them.. Had dinner at a stall at the top floor of Far East Plaza.. The auntie serving was so fierce, even I felt uneasy.. Haha.. In the end, she forgot to collect money from us, and I have to go back and pay her.. Haha.. Really fierce.. But the noodles there was quite nice.. Can go and try, if you guys dare to face her.. Haha.. Slowly, bit by bit, I am starting to realise the cause and effect of whatever that has happened back then.. And the pic...

Today went for my ATP shoot. I am glad I got Marksman, scoring a total of 24 shots out of 28.. To some, it might not be something great, but to me its kind of a personal achievement, although its non-monetary.. But everything comes with a sacrifice... Haha.. I got many mosquito bites from the unforgettable 'commando mosquitos'.. And I managed to reach home at 12 a.m now.. Just had supper with Aloysius.. You know, despite the 3 of us being Virgos, we have awkwardly different characteristics... I would still say he is one of the only few good person I met in the Army after so long.. Last but not least, girls who visit or drop by my blog, can now go and look at Adelene's webbie.. She sells fashion merchandise of all kinds and patterns.. Those that I will never get to wear... So I am helping her advertise, sort of. Click on her name on the left column.. Phew.. Finally, the start of my long break.

Maybe I am really too free. Why do I even care? Heh .