In Search of Lost Innocence

Weird Things Happenin last nite... I dreamt of SUper Strange things... Omg... So scary... Hahaz... I dreamt twice of different stuffs... First time, was i engaged in a serious gun battle wif anotehr guy in Nanyang... She tried to shoot Shimin... Den i blocked wif my back... Around 50 shots... OMG.. Den i fell down... Den.. He wanted to shoot Shimin again... Den I stood up... N blocked AGAIN.. Tis time wif my front... Dots... I den found out.. The bullets didnt went into mi.. instead.. it touched my skin n dropped to the floor... Omg... Wat the hell was tat... So scary... The feelin of being shot.... Hahaz... Muz be too much pi li huo.... The second one.. Was... Shimin n I were on the bus... Wif ying n alvyn (my montfort fren).. We were happily chattin... lol... Den reached Marina, however the place in my dreams resembles Kovan... Hahaz.. Den nvm... We got off the bus.. Den A LESBIAN FOllOWED US.... Den she kept on starin at Shimin at close range... Den i ask her to go away.. DEN SHE CL...

Sianz.... Juz came back home... From tiring Band prac.. which ended at dunno wat time... I lended my hp to other ppl... Huever msged mi wun get a reply.. at least for todae... On the Way home... Shimin cried... She cried lo... Haix... She didnt tell mi anything till on bus... Den found out.... Is tat she dun wanan fail her test again.. Tml got maths test... N i hafen study yet... Hahaz.. Den she sae no time... Haix.. Wat to do... i can do nothing at all, except to console her n so on... Haix... I reached home at 9 plus... Sianz.... I m breakin down soon... All sorts of crap comin into my head.. I haf been thinkin bout some things for the past few days... How to clear my name back at Montfort, and get back to my old best friend, hu currently is gone... Whether to conduct peer tutorin classes for my beloved frens hu are havin trouble to cope wif their studying... How to pass my own block test.. Sumhow... Things juz seem to repeat itself... I m sick of it.. Ohh god... Pls... SAve mi... I ...

Many things happened last week... Still tryin to overcome it... Heard some news back at montfort.... Lots of old history la.. But about mi.... Hmm... Den kinda found out i got backstabbed by many guys.... Even now in NY... Hahaz... A bit shocked la, but nothing's a surprise... I m used to it le... Sumwat i think, i lost my best friend due to some fantastic moron sowin discord between us... I didnt like tat guy.. A well-bred sissy... Ignorant n Arrogant... Too bad, I cant do anything.. Coz he seemed to be beli close wif my best friend, hu is the DM(Drum Major) of the band... Den many many rumors.. He seemed to get more arrogant n cocky each day... Should haf stopped him in his own way long ago, but didnt do anything, as in not to displease him.. Many dun liked the guy, but onli gossippin in secret... Na... A stupid F**Ker.. I should haf killed him... Nevertheless, he is still up n running... Alive n kickin... I WILL NOT step into Montfort Military Band again... Whether they need mi ...

Reflectin... I was lookin through friendster at my old frens n all... Den was thinkin n thinkin.... Actualli... Frens dun last forever.... Dunno lehz... Sum point in time.. They will seemed to be gone... Where once 'together-always' buddies haf now become isolated strangers... I dunno wat is wrong... I used to think tat... If frens appreciate watever each other is doin, the friendships should last as long as possible... But actually... I think tat is not realli the case.... Once I tot best fren, has now gone far away to dunno where... Tryin to hide into the discrete alleys of Los Angeles... Where I can find him no more... Izzit my fault wen I showed 'defiance' to watever u all wished mi to do? Sumtimes, I juz wanna be myself... Its hard.. I lived in a life accomodating others... Well, now tat i haf grew out of it... Wat wrong wif tat... I realli dunno wat to do to realli please sum of them.... I dunno... Do i haf to follow ur feelings always? Wat about mine... Time Has ...

Stupid day.... Realli feelin sianz now...No mood for anything... Todae Soccer was horrible.... Dun even wanna tok bout it... Lost to luck... Lost all my mood.. The worst part of it was to lose to Alvyn.. N i was one of the worst players on pitch...Wat a Dae... Sianz Went home... Took 101... Dunno for wat reason fell asleep while msgin min... Den overtook a few more stops... Walked back.. Dumb... Now waitin for min to come online... Den go for supper... No mood to go, but a promise is a promise...

Todae was Vdae... Dun realli liked mondays... Haix... got scolded... Aiya.. Dun care... Yesterdae went out wif Min to celebrate Valentine's Day... In advance, coz todae sure no time one... Den got ourselves lovers mugs, one each... Heez... So nice... Went to watch I do I do, laughed alot... Stupid but funny show.. Real funny... Hahaz... Den went to take neo prints... Lol.. I m not used to doin these kind of things... Den min forced mi in.. Lol... So paisei one... But wen inside the machine liaoz.. Suddenly not paisei lehz... Started playing wif the machine... So fascinating.... Lolx... Can add flowers n stars one.. lol... So fun to play... In the end the picture came out... I cut away my own head... DOTS.. hahaz... Lalalaa... Den went to eat at Cineleisure.. Yeah.. So fun.. Heez.. Hope to go out again soon... Hahaaz.. And to all those couples or couples-in future, Happy Valentine's Day!!

Band... Say i attitude... Ok LO.. Watever shit u sae... I HAF ATTITUDE.. SO WAT.. SHUT THE BLOODY F*** UP.... THE HELL I CARE... Haix... I haf been beli nice to ppl alreadi.. I since to be losin patience tis few weeks... I haf lost touch wif my classmates, due to band, my studies, due to band... It is not as if i m pushin all the blame to band.. But it is juz too much... Damn you yr ones... If this was still in sec sch, i would haf scolded u all alreadi... Dun Test My patience. Philjin, for one bloody hell time, conduct properly.. Dun conduct n sing to urself like a fool... We are playin the music, not you... U dun sing like we play k? U are supposed to lead us, not wave tat dumb stick like the statue of liberty... WTH...

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