It rains here. And when it rains, it pours. (Now I know where the phrase comes from.)
Except for when it rains little misty dew drops like fairy kisses. I love that.
But usually, it pours.
And it's rarely a scattered shower; the rain here is a day-tripper. It packs a lunch and stays a while; and if you happen to wash your car, it will be sure to stay the weekend.
Ryan is befuddled with the yard. He used to experience Man vs. Nature in one way, fighting the elements and convincing his desert yard to bloom. His favorite weapon was Miracle Gro. His obsession was finding the perfect sprinkler timing to keep things green and use the least amount of water.
Now it's a different version of Man vs. Nature--the overabundance of water. The lawn grows so fast and stays so wet that our once fearless lawn mower has applied for a leave of absence and checked itself into the mental hospital with severe anxiety issues. I went to visit it the other day. It sat rocking in the corner, murmuring incoherently. I patted it tenderly on the oil cap. It was heartbreaking.
Everywhere you look there is something sprouting up from the ground--trees, weeds, wild grasses--eager to overthrow the landscape and take over the entire yard. It's like a trillion little Kim Jong-Ils.
And the Miracle Gro? It's been traded in for Round Up. Last night Ryan sprayed the living crap out of all the little weeds. I went out to find him dousing one of the flower beds.
"Seems like you're using a lot," I said.
"Yep," he said.
Then he sprayed them all again.
And then he asked for a bigger sprayer for Father's Day.
Now, all of this is not to say that I'm not enjoying my new environment. After all, it's the lush, green landscape that won my heart originally. The winding country roads are covered in a canopy of leafy green, which makes a drive to the nearest Wendy's a breathtaking experience. There are giant trees here--trees that people didn't buy at Costco!
What the?
And in the trees are birds that chirp and twitter (the old-fashioned way) and sing all the live-long day. I swear, some days it's like living on a Disneyland ride--the soundtrack is exactly the same.
And speaking of Disney, the fireflies are just starting to appear. Fireflies! They actually exist! They are not a fictitious Disney character as I'd previously believed! Strangely, everything I ever knew about life east of the Mississippi, I learned at Disneyland.
Although, I will say that there is a disappointing lack of churros here.
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