CROSSING OVER TO THE DARK SIDE

 

If you’ve visited these pages once or twice before, no doubt you’ve heard me mention my beloved “crackberry”.  My love affair with my “crackberry” aka blackberry began years ago.  Oh sure, I’ve upgraded over the years to newer, more flashy models but a loyal blackberry fan, I have been.  This fancy little device brings me my email instantly allowing me to tend to business and pleasure from almost anywhere.  Friends, family and colleagues can reach me via phone, email, text, blackberry messenger, facebook and twitter any time.  While some see that as a disturbance, I like to be connected at all times.  I have my crackberry at my side 24/7 and I like it that way.   I don’t like to think that someone needs to reach me and can’t.  ….and I can never understand why anyone would ever want to wait to hear from me.  Crazy nonsense! 

About a month ago Verizon announced that they would be offering the iphone.  Now the only thing I’m more loyal to than my blackberry is my cell carrier (….oh and MHS).  They all have their drawbacks but most of my friends and family are on Verizon and that saves me minutes and minutes equals dollars.  ….and I’m cheap like that. 

I have to admit that in the past, I have always sort of turned up my nose at the iphone and its users.  I may or may not have  thought that my crackberry was far superior with its more serious, businesslike tone and fancy email push.

But lately, my head has been turned.  I am hearing the iphone and all of its fantappulousness call my name.   I have resisted it for a long time but that shiny little rectangle of awesome technology is making me rethink my love affair with my crackberry.  Daughter #1 has one.  She is always showing off all the advantages of the iphone.

I hear the email server isn’t the best and can’t compare to the crackberry but everyone appears to be so caught up by all the apps that they don’t care if they get their email in a timely fashion.  How can that be?  Is there some sort of gas that is emitted from the iphone that creates euphoria, reduces stress and erases the urge to have up to the minute communication with your office?  Do you just become so dazzled with all the apps and their capabilities that the main reason to have the device no longer matters?

The touch screen is more than a little daunting to me too.  I am a total SPAZ with a touch screen.  I presume that touch screen skills improve with practice but I worry that I might throw the darned thing out the window before I reach an acceptable skill level. 

So far, I’ve turned a blind eye.  I’ve stood fast in my love for my crackberry and could not be swayed.  But did you know the iphone has a weight watchers mobile app that is ever so much more efficient than the points calculator on my crackberry? 

Did you know that you can pull up a birthday candle app for an impromptu birthday party?   ….And blow it out?  Way cool.

So many apps, so little time.  One con to all my pros is that if I were to purchase one of these shiny devils, I may never look up again but instead be stuck with my head down in constant fascination of the wonder of it all.

Did you know that the iphone is faster than my crackberry.

Oh yes, my head is turned.  Surely, my crackberry senses that things are not the same between us.  Could this be the beginning of the end? 

Where do you stand on this issue?  Have you crossed over to the dark side?  Are you considering it?  Or have you found  a way to resist the ever-present temptation of this slick little bugger?

EDUCATING SMB

A little over a week ago, I announced that I had been selected to sit on the jury of a criminal trial. Due to an emergency illness with Daughter #2, I was excused after one day of testimony.
We, the jury, were told by the judge that the case would take two days. I was in attendance for the opening statements by both the prosecution and the defense. The United States presented their case and rested at the end of the day. I was not there to hear the defense. I have been watching the local paper to see if the case is mentioned and thus far…..nothing.
I couldn’t possibly have formed an opinion about whether the defendant was guilty or innocent having only heard half the story. I am left with many questions but they are not about guilt or innocence.
It was a drug case. The defendant was accused of selling crack cocaine and marijuana within 1000 feet of an elementary school and attempted assault on a police officer. Evidence was produced. I saw crack cocaine for the first time in my life. I also saw marijuana……..again. Hey, I was a teenager during the 70s. You would have had to have lived under a rock to have never seen marijuana during those times.
I learned that drugs are commonly concealed in those little plastic tubes that super glue comes in. Now every time I see super glue, I’m going to wonder…….Drug dealer? Drug user? Broken dishes?
The marijuana evidence was presented in little ziploc bags measuring about a square inch. Once filled with this grassy substance, the bag was about the size of the end of my thumb. I had to wonder if this amount would even be enough to fill one joint doobie marijuana cigarette. I’ve always seen heard that the stuff comes in sandwich baggies typically filled one third to one half full. And I thought they were putting less in my cereal box.
This got me thinking. Where do you get little, tiny ziploc bags like that? I’ve never seen bags that size in my local grocery. Who supplies the suppliers? This drug business is a whole industry in itself. Who knew? Certainly not me.
The crack cocaine was presented to us in even tinier ziploc bags. Where do you get these things? And by the way, the bags are yellow. I got the impression from testimony that nine out of ten leading drug dealers prefer yellow bags over any other color.
I was also surprised to find that these drug deals can go down (I kinda sound like DeNiro there, huh?) for less than $10. My chocolate addiction is more expensive than that. I was always under the impression that illegal drug use was completely unaffordable. Obviously I was misled by the propaganda distributed by my parents and teachers. I’m not advocating that we all take up new drug addictions. I’m just simply stating that I was misinformed.
So, assuming that you are not an illegal drug dealer or a drug user, I have to ask: Have you ever seen these ziploc bags for sale? Have you seen them used for something other than crack or marijuana? What are the other uses for this type of baggie? Do the suppliers know the intended use of their product? These are questions I would like to have answered.
Can you help a smart mouth broad? This inquiring mind needs to know.