Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Guilt followed by regret.

I didnt expect to see my grandfather in the coffin the today. The last time I've last seen him was probably a few months ago and I.. just didnt expect myself to see him the next time ( as well as my last time) in that peaceful bed he laid.

I'm feeling regretful, how come i didnt initiate any visits?

That glass panel over his body just made me feel so indescrible. That glass panel served as a barricade between earth and heaven.

He passed away peacefully. He lived at a ripeful age of 89. The angels have brought him home, peacefully.

My grandmother swollen eyes just said it all. She misses him, badly.

Perhaps, this event would make it clear (very clear, actually) for me to treasure my loved ones. "We live only once" that saying goes.. this event will be an eye-opener for me, i'm sure. Treasure my loved ones. We really dont know what will happen tomorrow, might as well live each day like it's our very last.

I really hope that my family would understand that. Sarcasm? Replace it with praise. Pissed off? Tell them what's bugging you. What is so difficult about it? Shouting? replace it with laughter.

What's so difficult to love one another?

We live only once, isnt it? Why plunge ourselves in self-pity, anger and frustration instead of a life full of light, joy and laughter?


I really sincerely truely hope that this is a blessing in disguise.

I'm proud of my dad, by the way. He's a very fillial son and damn it, i really should learn from him.


Grandpa, may you rest peacefully. At 5, i used to kiss you on the cheek. At 13, there were no longer kisses; I replaced it with hugs. At 16, it was just a touch on your arm. A stroke, probably.

No more kisses, no more hugs.

I wished i could just rewind back time... and continued to kiss you on the cheek and hug you. It's not going to happen, i know.

That's why.. right at this moment, I'm going to remind myself to show that I care for my loved ones. A kiss on a cheek, a hug, or a sweet simple SMS would just prove that I care. I'm not going to give the same lame excuse about, " Ah, they obviously know that i care what." when i dont even bring myself to show them.

This is probably the most enriching event that taught me so much about life and death.

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Eh eh! I've got something to share with all of you.
Remember last night I mentioned about cleaning up my room?

OH MAN. I tell you, it's so CLEAN now that you could just slipped if you lay your first step to my room. And yes, even if you drop a slice of cake on my table ( My mom would probably start screaming her lungs out, " NO FOOD UPSTAIRS" ) I guarantee you that you just eat it from my table. Probably lick the table as well....

See, it's that clean!

My mom came into my room this morning and she was like, " WHAO! SO CLEAN! But, what's with the clothes on the table?" (yes, i'm gonna iron them later)

*GLEAMS WITH GREAT PRIDE*

Haha! So, i started cleaning from 1130 pm to 100am. HAHAHA! Even big sis got pressurised by me so she started cleaning her shelves in her room as well. And what time did i sleep? 3AM. The caffein in my blood probably lost its effect after 3am, so yea... :/

Alrighty, I'm supposed to upload the photos right? Aiayah, sorry. But i'm using the desktop now so i cant upload them. Later okay?

Yizhen: Once you upload, i'll upload! :D I want that individual shot of ME. HAHA! Send me via email of something. Dont post on your blog la, so paiseh.

Ps: I'm glad you're feeling better already, My dearest michelle! :D

Saturday, July 22, 2006

Alright. Saturday's forever a sleepy day for me.

Anyway, I woke up with an aching back. My shoulder blade's aching for "dunno what reason." I guess i slept on the wrong side of the bed... but then again, my bed's aint that big. How did i ever get that ache?

And, i've also broke the record of vaccuming and mopping the whole of upstairs today. ( Do I hear applause? Thank you, thank you.)

Right now, after doing up this post, i'm going back to my room and TIDY IT UP. Goodness, my room seems like a tornedo that just caved in or something. Pretty embarrassing actually. HAHA! I've drank my caffein, so i'm pretty much awake. Let'ss just hope that I wont fall asleep while packing later. :/

Anyway, a BIG shout out to MICHELLE.
Babe, Get well soon okay?? I miss you! :D By the way, You can call me anytime.. when you're feeling better. Drink lots of water okay? Dont keep falling ill, I'll pray for you! :)

I'm intending to update on Friday's happenings. Soon, I hope. Tomorrow, probably? Hahahah! I cant wait to post up some photoss that we took! :D

Goodnight, everyone!

Huda: Hahahah! Dont study, then HOW?! :/ Unless you've got a magical pill that allows me to attain good results without studying? Hahahahhahh! :p Keep it going, girl!

Yizhen: Though you had a boring orientation, your night was definitely better with ME right? DONT deny it, or i'll sever ties with you. >:p Hahaha! I had a wonderful time with all the Gays last night, by the way! :D

Wanyi: Okeydokey, Wanyi! :)

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Hullo you! Alright, Thursday. I really think that time passes way to fast. Hymphs. Very soon, all of us will be caught tangled up with projects, revisions and individual assignments. Can you imagine? You put your buttocks down to the chair of your study table, scan your eyes across all your notes and textbooks and go, " Where do i start from?" Sigh, and grumble to yourself and then, start slogging your butt off your revisions.

At the end of the day, you ask yourself:
What is a the difference between catharsis and catalytic effect?

"Darn. Didnt i go through that before?" you wondered aloud. You tell yourself to think.

15 seconds later.

" Really, whats the difference?"

1 minute later.

"OH MAN. What the heck is the answer?!" You then get so frustrated with yourself, grab your lecture notes and find out the answer.

" Basket, i knew it. I JUST KNOW IT."

Liar liar pants on fire.
The thing about me is that i'm caught up in a denial at times. I mean, i could just spend the entire day studying-- plus a few minutes ( or hours, if you add all the minutes together) of day dreaming, going to the toilet and visiting the refrigerator. My mum will go, " One whole day never study! " " I did okay! I really did." I'll complain.

But the thing is, nothing goes into my head at the end of the day. It's a sick sick sick vicious cycle and darn, i hate hate hate it. I know it's a complete waste of time ( if i "studied" but nothing goes in) , i seriously do. But sometimes, your brain just refuses to absorb anything.

OR, I just didnt put my heart to it.

Yes, that's probably why. Shucks, how?
-
I had a MAD time with my fellow potatoes today. HA! We were laughing our hearts out in the library. Then, when one of us mentioned that the security guard was coming.. we quickly headed back to the cubicles and started acting as though we were studying. HAHA. Eh, our reactions were damn fast la. Within a second, we shifted our chairs, and hid our stifles of laughter while he walked past petrolling. HAHAHA! 3 seconds later, we formed a circle with our chairs and started yaking away again. :D

Anyway, I've gotten the habit to look out of the SBS bus 72's window whenever it drives along the Paya Lebar air base. I tell, the moment you catch a magnificient aeroplane , resting on the green grass, you'll just feel damn good. (Okay, maybe you dont. But i do.) It's so breath-taking man.You either smile to yourself or wondered aloud a big " WHAO." ( I do both) and you'll have a tough time peeling your eyes off the window. Then, the bus continue to roll its wheels and go down slope, you no longer see that aeroplane. A little disheartening but, you'll be so enthusiastic to go school everyday, hoping to catch the same scene all over again.

And it's really not like you can spot an aeroplane everyday okay. I've only managed to caught such scene thrice in my 4 months in schoool. Take 72 double deck bus. You probably get the same sight -- if you're lucky enough! :D

OH OH. I saw parachutes the other day too. :) I remember the good ol' days where my sisters and I used to stand on the bed and look out for parachutes around this period of time when we were younger. They were rehearsing for NDP, you see. It was a bonus at that point of time cus we used to live on the 10th floor.. and one of us woud also always go, " PARACHUTES come already! QUICK QUICK!" then you'll see three kids pasting their faces on the window panes and admiring the parachuters.

And yes, we used to catch fireworks display too in front of my parents' bed room during NDP. Ha! The 3 of us will end up jumping on the bed with excitement and singing all sorts of Singapore sing-a-long songs while the firework goes on display.

hahaha! Talking about good ol' days... :)
What was yours?

-
Ohhkay. Time to go because I need to get started on Mediasociety projects. :/ Catch you all later! (CATCH JOAKIM LATER.) :D

Wanyi: Hahha! :D I like Ruien as well! gosh, i'm infatuated with Elvin's smile! Yes, i'll try to make myself available okay? :D Handbells leh!

Huda: HA! Hey girl, i can always give you lessons! HA! Eh, take care okay? You've been looking sooo tired. Not as chirpy as before! :/

Michelle: Hahahha!! Aiayah, i make sure you master the art okay? :p We've got like SO MUCH ( a life time, can you imagine?!) time to learn! :)

Fangs: hullo girllll! Yes, i misss youu! :D

Yizhen: Yes, I'm going to start linking people up now! Sorry for not linking earlier! Yes, i've got hair to flip okay okay! believe me, i can show it to you. :D

Sammy: AIAYAH. YOU! Basket, you've seen me flip so many times already. Wah lao. You got mane meh? That bit of hair called mane ahh? Then the horse how? HAHAH! So how many strands of fringe do you have? :p

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

HA! I feel so gooood. Thanks Chiku for helping me transfer GEEK IN THE PINK into my MP3. hahahah!

Okay, I feel good because:

1. Today's a Wednesday. ( okay, i hate Wednesday mornings ( cus the buses are always screwed up every wednesday ONLY.) ) There's Singapore Idol later! Ha!
2. I've finished my journalism assignment. ( Ahhh, it was supposed to be done in 2 hours, but yeaa. I spent my entire time speaking (very) broken malay with Abby. I tell you, she's MAD. She really is. I had to entertain her. >:/ HA!! (ABBY, ARE YOU READING THIS?!?!?!)
3. Michelle posted up Edison Chen Photos on her blog. Major shock. HAHA! :D
4. Fangying smsed me last night with this uber sweet message. :)
5. I'm listening to GEEK IN THE PINK. :D
6. I can see Joakim later on TV.
7. I realised that Green&Pink goes pretty well with each other. WATER MELON AHHH.
8. YIZHE CALLS ME : BQRLDG . HA! (Basket Qian Ru Long Dong Qiang.) (tskkk. LONG DONG QIANG was supposed to be Yizhen. Oh well... that scheming girl managed to reverse the title "long dong qiang" to me instead. :/ )
9. I'M EVERYONE'S LOVABLE ROOOOOO. :D

Okay, I know i'm a little to happy and quirky up here. I cant blog anymore because.... MY LAPTOP'S LEFT WITH 15% of battery. And i'm to lazy to plug in the wires. HA!

I'll reply to the tags later. GOTTO RUN before the laptop goes on hibernation. :/

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Can you blow a bubble? Need bubble gum lessons? I can help!! 5 dollars per minute. ( Michelle, you want you want? ) Hahah! It's quite a good venture for money right? Bubble gum lesssonsss. HAHAH!!


Haha! Okay, I totally agree with Samuel that the previous entry was waaaay to depressing. (Oh,oh. Did i make you cry with me?) hahah! Oh well, oh well! Look, i think it's reallly inevitable ( and reallly OKAY!) to get emotional at any period of your life. I mean, despite all the laughters and madness you get, there's bound to have that softer and sensitive side that pokes you unneccssarily at sometime of your life; whether you like it or not.

Well, how did I managed that side of me? I blogged, and shared my feelings with all of you. Thanks for your concern, my dear friends. As much as i want to share my thoughts with you, there are definitely some that I wouldnt say even if you pointed your gun at me. Deep secrets that you cant touch, that's probably what it is.

I've got the habit to look at those headings that are located at your top left corner of your screen. "Secrets Dont Make Friends" I see that from Michelle's blog. Emmms, that's probably true to a certain extent.. but yet, there are just some things that it's buried deep deep deep in your heart that you cant afford to say it out.

Oh-kay. It seems like Cheryl would like me to do some quiz. Since i've got time to spare now, why not? :D By the way, this is MY FIRST time to post such quizzes. Let's see if I'll get addicted to it. :D

7 random facts about Me

1. Am brutally honest
2. Am very ambitious
3. Laughters, they get me anywhere.
4. I've got a BAD habit of reading my horoscope everyday. And when something bad happens, i'll go, " Damn, this is what i'm expecting today and it really happened! This source is SO true"
5. I need two alarm clocks
6. I watch football for Phillip Lahm. ( HA!)
7. As much as my friends say that Edison Chen's Gay, I refuse to get affected by their (lousy) antics to make me hate him or something. :p

7 things that scares me

1. COCKROACHES.
2. Bloody scenes
3. JU-ON (gawd, that kid is a killer.)
4. ESSENTIAL GRAPHICS ( HA! HA!)
5. Fights (Physcially, Emotionally, Psychologically, Inner Conflicts) Whao. I sure want World Peace! *flips my hair dramatically*
6. Datelines ( got it from you, Cheryl!)
7. The day i lose my MP3 ( eh, really. Without music, I cant travel to school.)

7 random music at the moment

1. Mockingbird
2. Remember
3. Shan Hu Hai
4. SUPERWOMAN
5. Because of You
6. Torn
7. Stupid Girls

7 things I like most

1. S MILES
2. Red beads ( Eh, I'm still in search of one! :( )
3. Unique Earrings
4. My Friendssssss. :)
5. SINGING. ( Eh, DONT LAUGH.) I can sing, okay!
6. Flipping my hair ( HAHAHAH!)
7. Licking my lips ( HAHAHA!) and sending flying kisses ( Oh man, FAINT. Quick, FAINT.)

7 things I say most

1. Wah lao!
2. Basket!
3. Aiayah..
4. Talk to my hand!
5. Whoo hoo!
6. HIGH FIVEE!
7. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!! ( Okay, you get the idea) HA HA HA!

7 people to do this

1. Michelle
2. Abby
3. Balerie
4. Wenxin
5. Yizhen
6. Effie
7. Aiayah, you la, okay?

Whao. I didn know that quizzes can be quite brain wrecking! I mean, these are the questions that I never asked myself, and now... they're asking me. and, I've got to sacrifice some brain cells just for this. Hymphs!

Anyway, I had such an enjoyable time with Melissa on Friday. Ha! It's been 100000 years since we've seen each other and we were like, " OH my! Is that You?!" hahaha!! *nudges Melissa* Someone's becoming prettier!! ( Eh, that DOES NOT mean you were ugly last time okay. I used the word " Prettier".) Quick, tell me you love me!

See la, because of ME.. the girl got ill. She felt like vomitting on the way home because we were laughing so hard during dinner. Oppsy. So next time, if you want date me out or something... please bring either a bucket or a plastic bag. You might be the next victim! *Grins :D Ha! Both of us shared similar situations and thoughts.. and hell, we're gonna meet up again.( This time, we're gonna talk for a much longer time) Dont worry, i'll try to surpress my jokes the next time, okay? :D We can yak at Heartland mall or something ( I know it's your FAVOURITE hangout.) *winks

Balerie: Thanks for your concern, my dearrr friend. I hug you!

Abby: I'm very sure that I'll use your shoulder one day.. ( YOU cant wait right?!) Aiayah. I like being tough, does that scare you?! I'm MACHO AHHHH. Hahahahah! Gawd, silly silly! Reply to my emails okay?! Who's dying to know what happened?! hahahahah!! Did you contact Edison/Phillipp for me?! Are they the ones DYING to know what happened?! *rolls with laughter*

Yizhen: LONG DONG QIANG! That's like the sweetest thing you ever said. I'm so touched!!! Hahahah! Dont worry, I got over it already. Thanks for that sweettest remark! :D

The Cat: My dearest babe!! Thanks for being there for me all these while. My goodness, i realised that you're just a few steps from me and a call away! Be prepared for me to come over to your house man! ( To use the toilet/mattress again) Ha! Thanks, girlfriend!! *loves And yes! MY EYECANDY. Hahah! I saw it okay! He's hawt! Whoo hoo!

Wenxin: Hahah!! Yes, i'm okay! Just get yourself indulged in " It started with a Kiss 2" Do you need me to tell you the story?! Hahahhah!! I COULD SPOIL YOUR EXCITEMENT via mass conversation. Ha! >:p

Angela: Hullo you!! :D

Melissa: HAHA! Are you feeling better now? You're not scared of me, righhhttt? Hahahhaahh!! :D

Corinne: OH MY GAWD. What a nice surprise!! Hahahah! I thought I was probably "extinct" to you already. Nice to see you here! Yes! Meet up!! :D Gawd, study hard too okay??? Work hard and get into your favourable destination next year ( Come TP!) Ha!! :D Yea, I miss you!

Sammy: HI MONGOLIAN!! Aiayah. WHY you dont let us view your other blogs. That bad meh? YOU MUST BE POSTING PHOTOS OF ME THAT'S WHY. Hahahhahahhha!! Okay, i'll link you up!! Okay, you must be damn happy now because this entry much happier right? Hahahha! Quick, tell me i did a good job.

Cherelle: Hullo youuuuu!! Yes, meet up for dinner. It seems like we haven met up for the longest time even though we're in the same school! :/

Chiku: What? That must mean KINGKONG'S FAN CLUB or KWONSANGWOO'S FAN CLUB or something. Hahahahha! Dont want KFC. I want MOSburger!!

Effie: My oh my! I've been enjoying myself because you're there to make me laugh! :D ( are you gonna get all teared up by my oh-so-sweet commeent? :))

Thursday, July 06, 2006

Right at this moment, I'm sitting down here with mixed emotions. My mind's pretty in a whirl right now, I dunno what am I thinking about.

I've come to realised that whenever I smile, deep down I'm not exactly feeling the same. Yea, perhaps when I laugh; it's MY way of relieving my real inner thoughts ( to make it sound more straight-forward; it's my way of releasing my frustrations, confusion) . And that can be absolutely deceiving. What an irony! You start getting confused ( like what I am right now) and the people around you think that you're such a happy go lucky girl; to an extent even if the world comes crashing down on you, you're still be able to lift up your spirits.

What a joke.
It really is...
It really is...

Gawd, I dont know what's going on with me. I want to cry, I really do. I feel awful whenver I hide my feelings around my friends.

I've always been capable of handling my own situations and problems. (That's probably the reason why people come to me and bare their problems to me. I dont mind that, really. Cus it really goes to show how much you trust me.) But right now, I'm feeling choked up with emotions, I dont know where the hell am i heading to. I feel so useless all of a sudden; I'm not able to face up to reality. I've been replacing my unhappiness with laughters and insanity -- and hell, it always worked out for me. Granted, it's probably a temporary stress-relieving technique; for when I go to bed alone, and I start thinking back about what happened during the day.. I feel crappy. But hey,at the very least, I'm still able to keep up with my optimism during the day.


Now, I cant do that. As I'm blogging, my eyes are totally fogged up and it seems like the monitor's blurred. Pardon me if I type wrongly.
Cracked up, is what i feel.

Oh hell, what's wrong with me?

At least, I've come across something very comforting apart from my unhappiness. Here it is:



Michelle, it's such a beautiful artwork that you published on your profile.
Indeed, it brought a smile on my face! :)



I'll tide this over, I believe I'm strong enough to face this up.

Michelle: That's nice! Tag more often, okay? So that I know you're doing well despite our busy schedules! :)
Tracy: Okay la, I realised that I cant live without you. Happy? *hugs

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

Hulloooooooo. :)

I've typed out a post but I decided to delete it all immediately. :)

Havent been blogging; that's the reason why I haven replied to your tagss. So here goes!

Tracy: I dont think you'll ever have a chance to kick my butt cus we're OVER ( in the midst of Marketing Lecture) Ah-ha! Tell you what, I'll kick yours first?? I think you need a good wake-up call man.. and STOP your obsession with Mr Brownnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn. :)

Abby: Arent you happy to have me as a friend?? Ha! ( I bet i'm obliged to say that i'm so GLAD to have you as my friend as welllll. :) )

Head of Family: YOU! EFFIE! Wah lao, you still announce that you're "Head of Family" when you dont even go for lunch (or even shout out a BIG " Goodbye!" ) to us every TUESDAY. You dont exactly set a very good example y'know!

Munah: Hullo Munah! Whao, where on earth did you linked me from? Ha! Yes, Philipp Lahm's(WHOOHOO!) HOT!

Sammy: *Kicks very hard and does a curtsey* :D

Shasha: Hello! Hah! You're?????

Tina: YOU YOU YOU! DANIEL AW. Hahahahhahahha! You bet i'm gonnna BOMBARD her with questions. Do you want to record it down for me???? :)

Huda: YES YES. I'm ROOOOO. I'm ROOOOO. Okay okay, i got it. I GOT IT! :D *hugs

LIZ: GIRL!! Whao, You did a wonderful job that night! I owe you one, okay!! :D I miss you mannnn and all the other Sec4s Handbellers. WE SHOULD MEET UP. Really, really. Yes, King Kong's forever your favourite "pet name" to me, yea!! You LIZZOOOOOO. BAH!

alicia: You! I hope you're doing welll!!! :D I missssss you tooo! Hahahhhah! We should catch each other up soon man! Watch MOVIE again? :)

Title; Its a lie
Brushes; intheorchard.net,jc.net
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