This week has been emotional, probably due to the FYP bomb that has suddenly landed on us 2 weeks ago that has forced me to question myself where do I want to go in the future, what do I want to do with this FYP. I'm seeing it as an opportunity to create whatever I want.
I've never felt so strongly for things in a long time that I would go all out and talk to people for advice. It has made me come to a realisation that I have reached the end of Year 3 in my 4 years here in ADM and I really don't want my learning to end so soon. I'm usually a quiet person, who's shy to speak, or tends to get nervous when I'm speaking perhaps to a stranger or in a public space. But these days I've been hopping around my profs' offices to talk, or to my dear peers who are always there to listen me out. I'm truly grateful for that.
There is something about ADM that has changed my life, especially in terms of thinking. I can feel the capacity of my brain growing, how I keep posing questions to myself or find things interesting that I want to investigate further. I love all my classes this sem and I am sad that it is coming to an end.
I found a special liking to my symbolism in film prof, who is about 80 years old with a huge tummy of knowledge and life experience. Imagine a person having lived through the 2 world wars, I think it is really incredible that he stands here in my class and shares with us his insight about a new film every week. I never thought we could look at a film this way even though I tend to fall asleep through these extremely difficult and abstract films. But I do enjoy playing "detective" to catch all these "symbols" planted, it's like mystery solving. A process frustrating but rewarding when you do find something worth investigating. He said he's involved in an exhibition with a media artist who's celebrating his 100th birthday this year, and again I thought these old people are so amazing to be alive and sharing their experiences to the world. I can't wait to be old!
Then there's Graphic Design, what I appreciate most about J is that she brings in guests to crit our work or give us lectures. Today again, I felt very small and that I'm young and naive, underexposed to the large world out there. And I really appreciate her for lending me a listening ear, sharing her life experiences and answering my questions all the time.
Tomorrow's gona my last lecture for history of animation, last class with Capuzzo. He has so much energy and life when he talks about all the works of the entire course the whole time that it is hard not to like him. It is so fun to listen to him talk about his awe for Cinderella, sharing this elaborate candle light holder thing with a landscape of Paris so intricately carved that he says represents our society. This society is already so well made that we're not lacking anything so how can we contribute, where do we stand? After that he switched off the lights and lighted a candle in. The Paris landscape changed, now with the light, the shadow casted upon takes an even more beautiful shape of the city. Wow, we exclaimed. Then he said, this is how you can contribute, we are living in it, we are the light to this society, making it more beautiful.
There's also Joe in Prod class who's been very nice, like a Dad with many kids taking us to field trips to print and paper houses, 睁一只眼，闭一只眼 on our tardiness and slack.
Just want to say I've absorbed a lot, just like a sponge and it's overflowing. I've taken a lot from my teachers and now that I'm coming to my final year, I want to be able to give out, all the things that I've taken and fuse something that I can contribute back in return. Perhaps that could be a direction I can look into for my FYP, applying this to a subject I feel very strongly about.
That's what's been going on my mind this whole day, so being the open book that I am, showing it all on my face unknowingly, people start to ask me what's wrong, am I okay. I feel so loved. haha. Thank you all, I'm really okay, just a little emotional today. : )))
