Ashley

A separate profile that was created due to work. This person serves mass market consumer on their first point of contact with the company. Customer Care Consultant is the exaggerated title given. There are a lot of things that the company place in this role that they perceive can do a lot of things.

After being exposed to the live environment, there is significantly not enough trust the client company is giving to the agents working on floor. The company expects CCC to be giving solutions, but did not allow enough resources to search for the solution. Everyday consumers call to complain about things that the agents cannot change. It is the choice of words and the way agents take it which determine the kind of life an agent live with.

Looking at the society from a different perspective, especially a swap in consumer and servicing agent roles. Being able to experience a different culture is good, yet unknowingly I am frustrated by the fact that I cannot bring change to a place that I wish can change to be better.

小鹿撞死了

缘分可以很恐怖，因此我尽量不要去解读它。
我怕汇错意，我也怕传错情。
曾经小鹿乱撞，一直撞一直撞，现在大概撞死了吧。
一次又一次的巧合，超越了希望与失望的境界。

我的心有血有肉，凭什么要经历这有的没的啊~

I survived!

thank you all for the concerns. I am still alive after a very busy week. first week at job training was an entirely new experience for me and so far I think I am coping well.

to be working as a customer service consultant has always amazed me somehow. I always wonder how much more I can learn if I face customers at the front line than to be processing/planning something taking their response for granted. of course everybody around me has advised on not taking up such a not-highly-paid position. but my stand is still the same, I think I have to learn everything from the floor. so in the event of trying to climb the corporate ladder up to management level, I can have some solid experience of such front line position.

being in an office is a whole new story for me, especially the timings. did not really have enough sleep throughout the week and I think that makes weekend more precious. clothing was a trouble in the morning too because I do not feel very comfortable office wear. the restrictions that came with the rigid shirt and bottom somehow made its way into my life.

along the side line, I passed my Japanese Beginner 2 assessment. so I think I will give the next level another try, hoping to be able to cope with it alongside with work load.

wish me luck! :)

how to not die on Monday

I kind of admire my own skills of trying to cramp things into my limited time and work myself to the limits trying to achieve all the planned goals. at this very moment, I am totally suffering from it.

everything started on the 12th November where I busily prepared for the long-awaited convocation ceremony. in and out of the house I go, seeing so many faces and smiling for all the cameras around me. catching up with friends was like my theme for that weekend and along the way some birthday celebrations too.

early in the morning of the second day into the week was the start of my kiwi-land adventure. while everybody thought I had spent a week relaxing, I was actually on the run in a 6-berth campervan covering an average 300km journey every day visiting cows and sheep. 24th November was spent on the supposed-to-be-A380 flight and also on trying to fight the horrible 5-hour jet lag.

upon opening my eyelids on Thursday I started my journey back to KL to rush for class in the evening. this is the point where I felt my body dying. adding on to the havoc was the agreed job offer which commences next Monday and Japanese exam after work on Monday as well.

yes yes, I totally know that I over-estimated my ability to survive. just tell me a way how to not die on Monday. either that or I will post other updates when I survived Monday.

34th floor, Pacific Regency Hotel Suites

this is where you can find Luna Bar.

a pretty place to hang out, despite a bit pricey. still worth it if you bring a good camera there, because you can get very nice pictures. these ones that I am posting are unedited ones. pardon me for my lousy skills, was just trying to capture 'the moment'.

so here goes...

One

I used to regard someone as that one. until I realize that sometimes regarding someone as that one does not mean anything if he does not know about it. soon will be the day where officially we will meet for the one last time. stop all the coincidences, give me one chance to chase you out of my one little mind.

then I know I have to continue on with my life as one. one person looking for a job in this very big market. one person taking good care of myself, because there will be possibilities of unhappiness if you have more than one taking care of you. not forgetting all my friends that supported me this far, you all will continue being there as my major source of synergy... but there are times where one is better than two right?

Doing-nothing-ness

9 more days to the eleventh month of the year.

this is starting to freak me out a little, simply because convocation's coming and the last ever trip for the year is approaching too. my oh my... it will then be followed by work + work + work + never-ending worklife. of 10 friends that are working, 20 of them are shagged (almost) all the time. this fact is just scaring the shit out of me. :(

with that realisation, I have decided to submerged into a whole-'new'-state of doing-nothing-ness. many people have asked me the same old question, 'so what you do at home everyday?'. and they all get the same old answer from me that 'I don't know, anything I can think of...' *laughter*. so despite the aimless-ness, I guess I really treasure this whole period of official slacking time. (since I know once I start to work I will look back and really miss this kind of life.)

japanese class is by far the bestest best reason for this 'transition' period. its so far so good I guess, with the fact that my teacher happens to be my next-door neighbor. getting harder and harder eventually but I think I will be fine based on my interest in foreign languages. probably a japanese post some time later? XD

Elmo!

there are friends that are there for me when I am emotional.
I thank them for bringing up my mood, like totally.

'if you fail the world is gone.'
a very encouraging statement indeed, to share with all of you! :)

Attraction

人是经不起引诱的。
亚当跟夏娃会啃苹果，绝不是因为苹果看起来很好吃。
而是老是嚷嚷着千万不可以吃苹果，却种了一大堆苹果树的顽皮上帝。

-九把刀 《楼下的房客》

so true right?

Love need no words

Chinese woman. Japanese man. They met in China and got married after a year.

She knows no Japanese and he knows no Mandarin, they both know no English. She now learns Japanese and hopes to converse with him. In a year's time they will move to Japan and stay there forever.

The gap of knowing no common language. They both make attempts to close that up.

This is love.

Away from mainland

much anticipated trip after 70+ emails.
3 days 2 nights on Pulau Redang with 5 good friends.
sing 听海 and 泪海 until I almost 跳海.
burnt skin in order to protect the corals.
watched fireworks on the beach (too bad with the wrong person).
had a lot of fun!

***

***

of sand, sea and sun! *loves*

A place called here

We all get lost once in a while, sometimes by choice, sometimes due to forces beyond our control. When we learn what it is our soul needs to learn, the path presents itself. Sometimes we see the way out but wander further and deeper despite ourselves; the fear, the anger or the sadness preventing us returning. Sometimes we prefer to be lost and wandering, sometimes it's easier. Sometimes we find our own way out. But regardless, always, we are found.

-Cecelia Ahern

it all starts from 1

I reckon I stay at home a little too much nowadays. life has been quite the same everyday, just me and the teevee (which I am very much glued to). human contact had been minimal and that is not very good for the talkative me.

you know, when you are very much alone at home, you start to think about things. to be more specific, you start to recall the past and basically sink into that whole reservoir of memories. apart from that, you also think about things that did not happen in reality but what you would have wanted it to be. combining the two kinds just brings ME to a very bad shape emo girl. :(

friends, in general, forms majority of my memories. I just thought that it would have been fun if certain days of my life can be re-lived so that I can taste happiness once again. but 景物依旧, 人事已非 (same setting but with different stories in the making). sometimes it is just not quite easy to backtrack those days where I didn't know any friends and all I had was daddy, mummy and kor kor.

emo elmo! (>.<)

Lovely Bones

this film is indeed special. it portrayed 'the story of a life and everything that came after'. it was about a murder and the way people accepted the lost. most importantly it pointed out that we can only be freed from ourselves when we know how to let go.

but how easy is it to let go?

next

a week since I came back to this hectic city. honestly, life has not been too hard for me (too relaxing in fact). it is just that everyday I wake up facing a whole series of unknown which has no answers to it. it is not the fact that I am not satisfied with the current relaxed life, but the fact that I am just lazy to move on.

one of the reasons I tell myself to live a peaceful life of just attending Japanese class is that I have another one-week trip in November which stalls all the time before that. I wish that life stops at this point in time but it didn't pause at all. so everyday I think of what I can do and just convince myself that the job-searching shall start after I really get ready to work.

this does not seem to calm myself down, but I don't know what's the rush. whatever is the next phase of my life seem to be so interesting but I am just not ready to proceed on.

Gathering

ever since I set foot in JB, I have been spending some time out meeting and catching up with some friends. the blossoming cafe industry has somehow or another facilitated for all these gatherings to take place. with board game cafes, bubble tea huts and many more type of random and odd places to chill in, I would say youngsters nowadays are so lucky.

people, can try visit these interesting places if you do come to JB. :)

Tired-ness

a week since exams ended. now I am back in JB, back at home where I feel relaxed. haven't recovered fully yet, considering I keep waking up at 8am every morning to accompany my parents for breakfast. afternoons are always hard to fall asleep because I come online to settle 'business' and I haven't been used to taking afternoon naps.

6 days now and I already not know what to do. oh no~

*had a great time with June yesterday having dessert. more to come! XD

真的忘了

怎麼開始忘了
演唱：林隆璇，張芸京

琴鍵那麼重 我用技巧去彈奏
情緒那麼濃 我該用甚麼去快樂
隱密到最 後 在我失去了以後終於懂得
追夢若是片寬闊天空 只是我從沒抽離過

吉他那麼重 我已無力去彈奏
不想作什麼 誰能陪我清唱那首歌
不是我不懂 擁抱之後總是難以去承受
那些認真的美好都一閃而過

怎麼開始忘了 我 還能微笑
怎 麼開始忘了 我 還有心跳
那些黑色的玩笑 沒有受傷不會好
我們還在找 自己的生存之道

慢慢釋懷才能讓自己變好
朦 朧的話只是無聊的暗號
流言傳來傳去 不知何時平息
該如何去面對 那不重要

琴鍵那麼重 我用技巧去彈奏
情 緒那麼濃 我該用甚麼去快樂
不是我不懂 擁抱之後總是難以去承受
那些認真的美好都一閃而過

怎麼開始忘了 我 還能微笑
怎麼開始忘了 我 還有心跳
那些黑色的玩笑 沒有受傷不會好
我們還在找 自己的生存之道

慢慢釋 懷才能讓自己變好
朦朧的話只是無聊的暗號
流言傳來傳去 不知何時平息
該如何去面對 那不重要

怎麼開始忘 了 我(你) 還能微笑
怎麼開始忘了 你(我) 還有心跳
那些黑色的玩笑 沒有受傷不會好
我們還在找 自己的生存之道

慢 慢釋懷才能讓自己變好
朦朧的話只是無聊的暗號
流言傳來傳去 不知何時平息
該如何去面對 那不重要

Exam stress

this might be the last time I am going to talk about undergraduate-level examination stress. I pity my pea-sized brain that was pan-fried for the week and will be deep-fried by the end of this coming week. brain cells of acceptable quality are depleting at unprecedented rate, together with hair loss. of course the second-time experience of the 2 same papers multiplied the stress level.

this feels like somebody wanting to kill me but did not do it at one shot. a little hole is pierced, blood started dripping drop by drop and nobody is stopping the bleeding. soon enough, I will be dead; prior to that, I am to endure this whole slow and torturous process.

I tell myself that I can do it, by believing that I can do it.
I now hope that I can do it!

眼泪

哭
演唱：陈庆祥
只有真正懂得付出的人
才懂得何为哭 为何哭
再坚强的心 偶尔也会脆弱
心会痛 心也会感动
只有曾经真心付出的人
才懂得何为哭 为何哭
泪水要记得为真心保留
眼泪 别白白的流

***
妈妈问我：‘怎么曾祖母过世的时候，我好像没有看到你哭？’
我沉默不语，不知该如何回答。

其实我也是有血有泪的，我也会哭。
只不过我不喜欢让人看见我流泪。
装坚强，比爱哭软弱更适合我。
从小就很喜欢这首歌，挺有意思的~

Lenovo ThinkPad Edge 13

considering of changing my Dell XPS M1210 for a Lenovo. fascinated by the white one, although would prefer one with the scratch-proof matt surface of a typical IBM ThinkPad.

ok my Dell is 3+ years old and I would consider it to be a good-performing notebook. just that the battery died shortly after 2 years and I just don't want to spend the money of refreshing the cells. but I have just changed the OS to windows 7 and I think with a refreshed battery it would be just nice.

oh no what to do?
the temptation of a new machine... :S

the LAST assignment

Leonardo da Vinci once painted 'the last supper'. here I am talking about 'the last assignment' of my university life. degrees of angers and shock was portrayed at the masterpiece while mine was just a clear exhibit of I-finally-understood-what-AFW 3121-is-all-about. you see, great minds think alike! MWAHAHAHAHA.

this AFW 3121 is actually code named 'Investments and portfolio management'. last year when I was taking the unit for the first time I totally did not know what it was about. put part of the blame on the lecturer and the rest on me because I did not really pay attention since it did not manage to grab any of mine in the first place. :P

so this time round, being the second and I-cannot-screw-it-up-this-time, I manage to figure out the assignment by myself and browsed through the textbook for answers. not like I am confident of a 100% assignment but I am actually quite happy to know that I actually can understand what I wrote in that report. AND ON TOP OF EVERYTHING I managed to get the whole report printed out 22 hours before its due. :)

so with the first and the last time I finished an assignment before due date, I think I am about to end university life SOON. like after 1 day's lessons and 2 exams.

She left.

一个礼拜前，她合上了双眼，离开了我们。
归土的时候一百岁（天地人各一岁，农历再加一岁），也该是时候了。
没有很痛苦，没有挣扎，就在冲完凉洗完头的时候仿佛睡觉般，安详地走了。

很想念她，却为她得到的解脱而感到欣慰。

instant memory

the three close friends finally met up after 2+ months. thanks to the wonderful-ness of Polaroid pictures, we were able to create such instant memory in hard copy! :P

酒

yesterday my facebook status was: '饮啤酒可以解热气,消怨气,兼且可以为生活打打气!'

today a friend posted the following... ... ...

喝酒的女人，是没男人疼的女人。
哪有男人会让自己的女人在外醉酒。
喝酒的女人，是受过伤的女人。
在现实生活中一次次跌倒, 满腔热情换回满心伤痕。

喝酒的女人, 迷恋酒精的麻痹，失去了酒精的麻醉夜不能眠。
喝酒的女人, 心里有太多的苦楚, 心底有许多许多的寂寞。
喝酒的女人, 爱上了不该爱的人, 她们穿过杯底可以看见所爱男人的眼泪。
喝酒的女人, 是因为想掩饰所有人前的不快, 她们只有醉酒才是解脱。
喝酒的女人, 只有酒精才能明白她心里最需要的是什么;
最想念 的是什么, 最割舍不下的又是什么。

喝酒的女人, 知道自己想要的是什么, 却不能去追求。
喝酒的女人, 害怕伤害了身边人的心, 却让自己的心千疮百 孔。
喝酒的女人, 不是淑女, 她们从来不会在喝酒时矜持。
她们会借着酒精高喊: '男人没一个好东西。'
喝酒的女人, 是矛盾的, 喝前想醉, 醉醒了又后悔。
她们永远都不会相信: 借酒消愁愁更愁, 这句话。

唉... 喝酒的女人。
一般女人不喝酒, 女人不喝一般酒, 喝酒女人不一般。
女人为爱活着, 爱也是女人喝酒的唯一理由。

爱... 喝酒的女人。
倒的是酒, 喝的是情, 醉的是爱。

Savings

looking for a partner is like looking for a piggy bank. after finding the one you like, both of you start to put in money. when you see your partner putting in extra amounts, you tend to put in more too. bit by bit both persons get to know each other better through the process.

as the piggy bank fills, some couples make it to the stage of getting married and settling down. however couples do break up and when that happens the piggy bank is to be smashed. when broken, everything in there resurfaces but there is no point of return anymore. on the other hand those that proceed on to happily-ever-after stage will happily bank in all the money. the years following marriage, love will be depleting like the money in that account.

there are many types of account:
current account for not very loving ones
savings account for the long lasting couples
loans for those that got together because of 'mistakes'
... ... ...

so nowadays there are deposit insurance available to guarantee savings, is that equivalent to pre-marital agreement? :P

Plannings

a lot of my friends just joined the workforce. so after 2/3 months working, everybody starts to plan for a getaway. Shanghai World Expo 2010 is one of the popular choices, just because it is a global event. near spots like Bali, Redang, Singapore, Pangkor... good weekend options. :)

but plannings are mere talks if nothing takes place. because leave is not easily available to everybody at the same time, people generally try to gather as much friends as possible to go on a trip together. so with more inputs to the criteria, a trip is really not very easy to organize after all.

thinking about the trips, it is sometimes faster to visit the places in your dreams! :P

尽头

一个人要走到人生的尽头时，竟然是这样被形容的：
‘就好像鱼没有水以后，嘴巴开大大，非常拼命的呼吸。’

还差四年，就成人瑞了。尽管我们知道她活得不是很舒服，随时都要有心理准备，但还是很不忍心。每天在照顾她的人，看着她的生命指数起起伏伏，已开始不那么在乎了。岁月在她的身上，划下了种种痕迹，有时候真希望她能早点摆脱一切，不要活得这么吃力。

现在就好像走到尽头，却找不到出口。
不得不相信命运，不得不听天由命了。

ps: 我怕，可是我不能怕。

Exit

there's this place without an exit.
once entered, very hard to get out.
its one's heart/mind.

in the first place not like you came in with permission.
but now you just don't go out.
WTH. :(

Photocopy

setting: career fair in campus
background: filled in questionnaire, in return suppose to get goodies bag

---E surveyed about grades of specific units---

E: What if your boss asks you to photocopy a stack of thing and send it somewhere?
E: How do you make that task interesting? Photocopying is boring one wo~
A: You can ask the office boy to do it what...
E: What if the office boy don't know how to use the photocopier?
A: Sack the office boy lo~ You don't hire fresh graduates to do photocopy stuff.

---conversation continues, E turns to B---

E: What about you? How to make that task more interesting?
B: If the task is given by the boss, then surely it has a meaning to it.
B: Try to find out how this simple task link to the company...
E: But its just photocopy and send anyway~
B: Then you can try to follow up by getting feedback from the recipient right?!

(A tries to end the conversation, B wants to walk away)

***
whatever it is, E annoyed me a lot. apart from telling me that I should go for a management associate program (which I already know), I did not know exactly what this firm is doing. been to so many booths at career fairs, this is by far the most irrelevant and a total waste of time. I mean like E did not offer me a job after 'grilling' me with such formal-job-interview-questions. furthermore my friend and I merely wanted to know what that firm was about since its the first time we are seeing the name/brand. and most importantly, she twisted most of our questions into questions for us and left other questions unanswered. so totally no point!!!

by the way, goodies bag turned out to be a pen and a stack of PHOTOCOPIED lengthy articles about the company.

Flight 9

learned about the incident from 'air crash investigation'. not a pleasant flight experience, but fortunately it did not turn into a disaster. nowadays the aviation industry was badly affected by the above volcanic activity in Iceland. not only in Europe, other parts of the world is facing the effect too. :(

nowadays there are a lot of natural disaster happening here and there, everywhere. its a challenge, to all of us, to think beyond ourselves.

Biological clock

I believe in a set routine for everyone everyday.

in kindergarten people tell you that 'early sleep early wake up got worm to eat' (早睡早起身体好). so people generally sleep at night and wake up in the morning to start the day. at university level, I start to sleep real late at night and wake up a bit late in the morning. but I seriously think I still have a biological clock within me that is more or less working quite normally.

my brother stays with me, in the same unit of the same building. however the last time I spoke to him face-to-face was 3 days ago. reason being when I go out (about 12noon) he is still soundly sleeping on his bed and when I come home (in the evening) he is out somewhere. then when I go to sleep he is not even home and the next morning I will wake up seeing him sleeping in his room.

it just feels a little weird that I am now trying to convince myself that I am living with a living person, to believe that he is an actual person and not an illusion. :S

Choices

when you give up something to get something else, it is termed 'opportunity cost' in economics that you are calculating. when you choose a path over another, it is termed 'crossroads in life'. when you are given alternatives to choose from, generally they are termed 'choices'.

so how you choose? rationally or irrationally?
or at many times, is the decision power really in your hands?

'Fringe' science

hooked on this series.
now showing season 2 in US.
*likes!* :)

Memory

Fishes have a short memory span of 3 seconds.
so they are very happy when staying in the usual rectangular tank.
since every 3 seconds they think that they have arrived in a new place.

Interesting eh? :)

有一个人...

有一个人, 你一上线就会去看他在不在
不在就一阵失落 ; 在 又不敢打扰
有一个人, 他的状态签名只要一换
你立刻胡思乱想 揣测不安
有一个人, 你总是忍不住去看他的空间
即使他什么新鲜事都没有
有一个人, 你会看他的最近来访和留言
然后又胡思乱想 揣测不安

有一个人, 你一直在等他
他却忘记了你
有一个人, 你真的好恨他
可是仔细一想 你恨他什么
恨他放弃你么?
那不如恨自己~

有一个人, 你以为他是你的永远
但是他却告诉你 你只是他的过客
有一个人, 你真的可以对他无条件付出
他却不稀罕; 对他来说, 你只是负担~
有一个人, 你那么那么舍不得
他却那么随意、洒脱、不在乎

有一个人， 教会你怎么去爱了
但是 他却不爱你了
有一个人， 你总说要放下他
却总是忍不住又拿回来回味
有一个人， 你真的好想他快乐
所以你宁愿自己不快乐
有一个人， 离开他的时候你笑了
但是一转身，早已泪流满面

有一个人， 你好想大声告诉他：‘我真的好后悔爱上你了！’
因为…你发现…你真的、是真的爱他
但是他不爱你了，这就是事实
那个骄傲的你去哪里了？

删掉了MSN 一个人 在电脑前流泪
删掉了电话号码 一个人 在窗前神伤
大哭一场
允许自己再大哭一场
以后 再也不会期待
不会看他在不在线了
不会看他的空间了
不会期待他的信息和电话了
不会期待他会关心你

有那么一个人，真的让你受伤了
值不值得 都不要紧

重要的是 记得曾经有那么一个人

现在我把爱情还给你， 那你把我的骄傲还给我 好不好?
爱情是很容易考验的。如果对方不以同样的爱情来回报你，那就是暗地里在轻蔑你。
在爱情里，最在乎的一方，最后往往是输得最惨的。
假若爱一个人没有回应，与其乞讨爱情，不如骄傲地走开……
这样，至少，你还能赢得最后的尊重。

***面子书上看到的文章

岁月神偷 Echoes of the Rainbow

很简单的电影，非常有意思的名字。
看完电影，最记得吴君如的一句话： 『做人，总要信。』

Someone

you still hate because you still care.
you still care because you loved.
you loved because you thought it was worth it.
you thought this one might be the someone.

the someone that accidentally made a mark in your memories. someone that makes you happy and sad both intentionally and unintentionally. someone that appears in your mind 80% of the time. someone that made you believe in impossibilities. someone that changed how you behave to an extent you never could have imagined.

sometimes somebody somewhere should somehow know about something.

What to do?

I have a great-grandma that is 96 years old now.

she is currently bedridden and has to rely on others all the time. tasks that she can do now are breathing and eating. with the body functions deteriorating at an unpredictable rate, we do not know when she will leave us. mentally and emotionally I am suppose to be prepared for her to go anytime.

knowing that she is the one that bathe me for the first time when I arrived in this world, I wish now that she can hold my hands firmly again. she always tells me about the importance of gaining knowledge, about how I should learn to be a strong girl and about how I should make my parents proud by being a good girl. as I grow older I start to know her more, she used to be a strong person too! and she lived with pride all her life...

all the way up till these few years where she had to move around with the aid of a walking stick. now she survives on formula and medications just to maintain the organs' functions. no longer being able to speak clearly, the only way of communication whenever I see her is through holding her hands and speaking from the heart. every word she speaks now uses enormous amount of energy.

despite her inability, she still tells me to buck up in my studies and live my life properly. she lived her life caring for everyone around her. true enough that 'because you love, you care', now I am so scared that this love of mine will be parting me soon.

Earth Hour

60 minutes of switching off lights.

did you support this act? basically not much of a point since people are just switching off lights but still using laptops, teevee, fans, air-cons, hi-fis and ten thousand other electronic gadgets. well, I did not switch on any of the lights or fans in my house, but the teevee was on standby mode and the astro decoder was on. in addition the fridge was still running because obviously CANNOT turn that off if not I will have nothing to eat.

irony of the irony, do you think the street lamps will be switched off? HAHA.

他们说，这样的女生很真

有一种女孩子在陌生人面前会很安静，很冷漠，
在熟人面前却很放肆，很霸道，
并喜欢一咋一呼的说：“滚，滚蛋，坏蛋，笨蛋”。
不要认为她很粗鲁，她只是很单纯的认为，
大家打打闹闹，骂骂笑笑，表示更亲切，更不分你我。

这一种女孩子不谈恋爱，只在姐妹间游荡
即使有不错的朋友，她还是无奈的笑笑
其实她只是在不能确定自己付出的前提下
不会接受，因为不想伤害。

这一种女孩子偶尔看到街上的情侣时，
也会幻想，也会羡慕，
幻想着将来自己的恋爱
该是多么的帅气，多么的温柔，多么的甜蜜

这一种女孩子，
喜欢和自己的姐妹在一起打闹，大呼小叫。
即使没有男朋友，
在她的世界里，也有她的骄傲！

这种女孩子也会偶尔的忧郁，
朋友问她怎么了 她也只会说没事
其实她只是感觉累了，
她只是需要一个拥抱。

这种女孩子不会轻易恋爱，恋爱了一定会好好珍惜。
她会骄傲的拉着他的手大街小逛，
不要认为她放肆，
她只是答应过姐妹们幸福要大家一块分享。

这样的女孩子恋爱的时候
喜欢大事听男孩子的而在小事上调皮，耍赖。
不要认为她太小气，蛮不讲理，
其实在她调皮的习惯里已经为你收敛不少！

这样的女孩子不允许男孩子的背叛，
如果男孩子真的办了对不起她的事，
她一定会狠心的离开你。
不要怪她太绝情，
她其实很爱你，但是卑微的爱情她不要，
她果断的转身只是不想让你看见她滑落的泪水！

这样的女孩子失恋的时候会在别人面前装的很好，
大声的笑，放声的闹。
当姐妹心疼的说：“你没事吧？”
她会放下她所有的骄傲，趴到姐妹怀里哭。
哭完了，苦笑一声：没想到我还会为一个男的哭。

若你遇到了这样的女孩，
如果你们是朋友，请原谅她平日的不理不睬，
其实她只是不会社交，不敢打扰，
你想想你的每一次邀约，她拒绝过你。
如果你喜欢上她，请你不要说出来，
因为她很幼稚，你会吓跑她。
原谅她的冷漠，
她只是怕伤害你！

若她喜欢上你，请你不要在她的世界里消失。
她没有更多的要求，不会打扰你的生活。
她只是想静静的看着你，
当你的观众，仅此而已。

如果你们已经在一起了，
请你好好珍惜她。
这样的女孩子、太傻，
请你别让她受伤。

这一种女孩子就以这样的方式生活着，
她有她的梦想，她的希望。
一个如花儿般的女孩子，
她时而快乐，时而忧伤；
时而郁闷，时而疯狂；
时而邪恶，时而善良；
时而脆弱，时而坚强！
你可以说她傻，也可以骂她笨，也可以说她冷，
但是她们还是生活在自己的世界里，
希望做一个幸福、善良的孩子！

big picture

I am retaking units this semester. so literal meaning is that I have been through the syllabus before and am doing it AGAIN. assignments, lectures, tutorials and most importantly understanding.

sitting in tutorials nowadays, it is understandable why I seem to know what is going on. I have gone through the tutorial discussions and prepared for the unit a year ago. so sitting at the insignificant corner I am allowed to look at things from a different perspective. yes, now I finally get the big picture of many things, especially how our moans sounded like in front of others.

then I thought (during lecture while listening to neighbors commenting on how hard third year subjects are) of the many point of views that one can hold, how each and everyone of us look at this world can modify our believes. yet again who are we to comment on the blackness or whiteness when we are nothing but beings in this grey dimension?

transition

continuing my life story from my previous blog, I am now at a whole new site.

a little bit about myself now that I just turned twenty-one. doing my last semester with 2 remaining units, still single and available, lazy towards participating in the workforce. may be very serious in front of strangers but totally different if one tries to know me. wish for as many chance as possible to look at this world, from as much perspectives as possible.

this blog has no tag board, so you are welcome to leave comments at the end of every post. I am trying to see which is better (tag board/comment page).