As usual I'm running in 25 different directions but wanted to post about my last doctor's appointment, although it was mostly uneventful (I say mostly because there was one measurement that has me a little worried, but I'll explain below in the "UPDATE").
Since I'm short on time I'm going to take the easy way out and use this format:
Pregnancy Highlights:
How Far Along: 23 Weeks and 4 days
Size of baby: He currently weighs 1lb, 6oz based on my last doctor's appointment on Monday.
Total Weight Gain: According to my home scale I'm up 13lbs - and the home scale is the only one I'm really paying attention to since I weigh myself every week at the same time on the same day.
Maternity Clothes: I'm about 90% maternity now. There are still two pair of jeans I can wear with the Bella Band but I'm quickly approaching the end of that. I will say the elastic waist is sooo much more comfortable!
Gender: One super-cute (yes, I'm biased) baby boy. He was in a good position at the last appointment and even the tech commented on his cute little nose when we were looking at the 4-D images:)
Movement: He is an active little wiggle worm. He seems to be most active in the early mornings, but I do feel him throughout the day. Yesterday I was able to see him from the outside for the first time. It was surreal!
Sleep: Not too bad these days. I finally caved and bought a "pregnancy pillow" and it has been wonderful. We're leaving for an 8-day vacation on Friday and I wish there was some way I could take the pillow. I'll sacrifice clean underwear for a good night's sleep anytime:)
What I miss: Sushi. Real sushi, not the faux shrimp sushi I have been making do with.
Cravings: Most of my cravings came in the first trimester and even then it wasn't anything that I didn't already eat. The one thing I haven't had since I was a kid and I simply HAD TO HAVE recently was pistachio pudding. It was heavenly!
Symptoms: I'm still having residual discomfort from the fibriods, but I think that's going to be my new "norm" for the remainder of the pregnancy so I've gotten used to it. I've also started to get some ankle swelling but not full blown cankles...yet.
Milestones: I'm in an odd in-between period. Because of my vacation next week I had to change my 24-week appointment to a 23-week appointment so it's throwing off the milestones. For some reason, 24-weeks feels like a big number. And I know 28 weeks will be huge when I cross over to the third trimester. For now, I'm on auto-pilot.
UPDATE: Everything went well at my 23-week appointment on Monday, but there was one number that the doctor mentioned. She said it wasn't anything to worry about but the Woowoo's head circumference was on the very low side of normal while all his other numbers were on the high side. He's still in the breech position which can affect the head size. The doctor who reads the ultrasound results didn't even mention it and said the Woowoo was in the 65th percentile and looked good. I'm trying not to freak myself out about the low number, but I admit it's going to be a long 4 weeks until my next growth scan. Dr. Google hasn't been my friend and resulted in some scary findings, so I'm done with him for now. I'm not totally confident the tech took accurate measurements because she only measured 3 of my fibriods when I know there are 6 and the 3 she did measure grew?!?! That makes no sense. The immense pain I was in is a strong indicator that the fibriods have been shrinking, not growing. Anyway, these are the thoughts I'm using to try and keep myself sane and not going into a full blown panic meltdown (I admit I was on the verge yesterday, but feel better today). Regardless, I love my little Woowoo more than I thought I could and want to protect him from anything bad...ever!
Showing posts with label over thinking. Show all posts
Showing posts with label over thinking. Show all posts
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
So that's what it feels like
I've heard and read about round ligament pain, but haven't experienced any (that I know of)...until about a half hour ago.
I've had pains, twinges, pulling, stretching, crampiness and general pressure in my lower abdomen from very early on (pretty much from week 5 or so). It was everyday for the first few weeks and then slowly decreased to once or twice a week for a little while. The feelings have been picking up speed again during the last week. I'm 11w3d so I just figured it was more ute adjusting as it starts to move above my pubic bone (according to all the books and Dr. Google this is about the time when things start shifting up).
I was sitting at my computer tonight and got up pretty quickly to walk to Hubby's desk for more printer paper. Once I got to his desk I had a horrible tight pinching sensation on the right side of my abdomen stretching down to the top of my thigh. I sat down on the bed thinking I just got up too quickly. That still didn't help so I actually laid down. A few deep breaths (and anxiety-ridden thoughts that I tried to push away) and the pain thankfully subsided.
I was able to get back up and move about as though nothing happened. I actually wondered if I imagined it because it went away as quickly as it came. It was a really odd and scary sensation I'm going to have to get used to or I'm going to drive myself nutty thinking horrible thoughts every time I feel it. Does the brain of someone whose experienced loss and IF ever stop with the worrying?
I've had pains, twinges, pulling, stretching, crampiness and general pressure in my lower abdomen from very early on (pretty much from week 5 or so). It was everyday for the first few weeks and then slowly decreased to once or twice a week for a little while. The feelings have been picking up speed again during the last week. I'm 11w3d so I just figured it was more ute adjusting as it starts to move above my pubic bone (according to all the books and Dr. Google this is about the time when things start shifting up).
I was sitting at my computer tonight and got up pretty quickly to walk to Hubby's desk for more printer paper. Once I got to his desk I had a horrible tight pinching sensation on the right side of my abdomen stretching down to the top of my thigh. I sat down on the bed thinking I just got up too quickly. That still didn't help so I actually laid down. A few deep breaths (and anxiety-ridden thoughts that I tried to push away) and the pain thankfully subsided.
I was able to get back up and move about as though nothing happened. I actually wondered if I imagined it because it went away as quickly as it came. It was a really odd and scary sensation I'm going to have to get used to or I'm going to drive myself nutty thinking horrible thoughts every time I feel it. Does the brain of someone whose experienced loss and IF ever stop with the worrying?
Friday, January 14, 2011
A week of firsts
I've lived in NYC for three and half years. In that time I've never had a solo celebrity recognition. I've been with friends who have recognized celebrities, but I've never noticed one without someone else first telling me who it was. I just don't have that celebrity radar the way some people do. Well, on Wednesday I was walking out of my office building saw Bla.ke Liv.ely (Goss.ip Gi.rl and Siste.rhood of the Trave.ling Pa.nts) walking towards me. I was able to hold the door open for her as she entered my office building (there is a sound studio below my office so there are always celebrities going in and out, I just never see them). She was much taller than I expected, but her hair was as amazing in person as on TV. I was so excited to have had my first real, solo celebrity sighting!
Wednesday night I was getting ready for bed, taking my evening progesterone suppository and noticed some pinkish spotting. I immediately started freaking out and had a restless nights sleep while visions of what happened last time ran through my mind. Things were a little better Thursday morning with less spotting that had turned all brown. By Thursday afternoon all seemed to be good. But then Thursday night the redish/pinkish color was visible when I inserted the progesterone (sorry for TMI). This morning it was a brownish/red but still there. I'm trying not to worry about it because everything else is the same as it's been. I keep thinking this is a result of the cysties on my right side. If things get worse, I'll call the Doc and see what he says. Tuesday is the next ultrasound and it sounds sooooo far away. I was hoping for a quiet, low-key long weekend but at this rate I'm going to be a total basket case the entire time.
I had to attend a going away party for a co-worker last night. I have always been one of a small group of colleagues that goes out for happy hour a couple times a month, so I had to go for fear of raising questions. I wasn't sure how I was going to deal with the fact that I couldn't drink because it's still way to early to tell anyone from work about the WooWoo. I was surprised how easy it was. We were all seated at a big table and I snuck away to ask the waitress to order me a gin and soda with no gin. She smiled knowingly and did exactly as I asked numerous times throughout the night as the rounds kept coming. No one was the wiser, which is good, because there is a birthday celebration next week that I'll have to go to as well.
And one last first to round out the week is the beginning of some nausea. I can't really call it morning sickness because it happened at night. I was in a cab on my way home from the work party last night and thought I was going to get sick. I almost had the cabbie pull over but decided to just take a deep breath and hope it would pass. I eventually made it home, but still wasn't feeling great when I went to bed. Things seem to be settled down this morning, thankfully, and drinking my decaf green tea right now is feeling pretty good.
The week isn't over and it's already proving to be a crazy one. I really hope this trend doesn't continue into the weekend...
Wednesday night I was getting ready for bed, taking my evening progesterone suppository and noticed some pinkish spotting. I immediately started freaking out and had a restless nights sleep while visions of what happened last time ran through my mind. Things were a little better Thursday morning with less spotting that had turned all brown. By Thursday afternoon all seemed to be good. But then Thursday night the redish/pinkish color was visible when I inserted the progesterone (sorry for TMI). This morning it was a brownish/red but still there. I'm trying not to worry about it because everything else is the same as it's been. I keep thinking this is a result of the cysties on my right side. If things get worse, I'll call the Doc and see what he says. Tuesday is the next ultrasound and it sounds sooooo far away. I was hoping for a quiet, low-key long weekend but at this rate I'm going to be a total basket case the entire time.
I had to attend a going away party for a co-worker last night. I have always been one of a small group of colleagues that goes out for happy hour a couple times a month, so I had to go for fear of raising questions. I wasn't sure how I was going to deal with the fact that I couldn't drink because it's still way to early to tell anyone from work about the WooWoo. I was surprised how easy it was. We were all seated at a big table and I snuck away to ask the waitress to order me a gin and soda with no gin. She smiled knowingly and did exactly as I asked numerous times throughout the night as the rounds kept coming. No one was the wiser, which is good, because there is a birthday celebration next week that I'll have to go to as well.
And one last first to round out the week is the beginning of some nausea. I can't really call it morning sickness because it happened at night. I was in a cab on my way home from the work party last night and thought I was going to get sick. I almost had the cabbie pull over but decided to just take a deep breath and hope it would pass. I eventually made it home, but still wasn't feeling great when I went to bed. Things seem to be settled down this morning, thankfully, and drinking my decaf green tea right now is feeling pretty good.
The week isn't over and it's already proving to be a crazy one. I really hope this trend doesn't continue into the weekend...
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
I could do this every day
Today was my first ultrasound and it couldn't have come soon enough. I had my first real panic attack last night to the point that I actually pulled out a POAS!
Yesterday morning when I was getting dressed I noticed that I was spilling over the top of my bra (Hubby loved this, by the way). But when I got home last night the girls were snugly back in place with no spillage. This sent me into panic mode and I started analyzing every symptom or lack of symptom I was having. Why are my boobs not as big as before? Why don't they hurt as much? Why does my back hurt? Why am I not as tired as I was last week? It drove me nuts to the point that I woke up at 4:15am and never went back to sleep. All my tossing and turning woke Hubby up. When I told him what was wrong he reached over, did a quick size check on the girls and told me I was being ridiculous. And of course I knew I was, because I had no REAL reason to think anything was wrong. I wasn't spotting or having any severe cramps.
Anyway, I was still a basket case until I was on the table in the Doc's office for my ultrasound. Once I saw the tiny little dark spot on the screen I immediately relaxed. We were able to see the gestational sac and one yolk sac (although he said there was a slim chance there could be another one in there). My numbers came back right on track - 10,082 hcg and 40 progesterone. So despite all my worrying, my little WooWoo (the nickname is a long story for another post) is doing just fine:)
There are still a few annoying cysts hanging out on the right ovary so my attempt at starting this pregnancy off on a healthy track is being sidelined. The Doc said no more running until the cysts are gone. I wasn't going crazy with the exercise, but I love cold weather running so I've been out a couple times a week. It looks like I might need to learn to love cold weather walking instead, at least for a little while.
I must say, a girl could get used to weekly ultrasounds - it's definitely a good way to calm the nerves. I go again next Tuesday when we'll hopefully hear the heartbeat, and I can't wait!! In the meantime, I'm really going to make a concerted effort to not over analyze everything and remain calm. We'll see how well that works...
Yesterday morning when I was getting dressed I noticed that I was spilling over the top of my bra (Hubby loved this, by the way). But when I got home last night the girls were snugly back in place with no spillage. This sent me into panic mode and I started analyzing every symptom or lack of symptom I was having. Why are my boobs not as big as before? Why don't they hurt as much? Why does my back hurt? Why am I not as tired as I was last week? It drove me nuts to the point that I woke up at 4:15am and never went back to sleep. All my tossing and turning woke Hubby up. When I told him what was wrong he reached over, did a quick size check on the girls and told me I was being ridiculous. And of course I knew I was, because I had no REAL reason to think anything was wrong. I wasn't spotting or having any severe cramps.
Anyway, I was still a basket case until I was on the table in the Doc's office for my ultrasound. Once I saw the tiny little dark spot on the screen I immediately relaxed. We were able to see the gestational sac and one yolk sac (although he said there was a slim chance there could be another one in there). My numbers came back right on track - 10,082 hcg and 40 progesterone. So despite all my worrying, my little WooWoo (the nickname is a long story for another post) is doing just fine:)
There are still a few annoying cysts hanging out on the right ovary so my attempt at starting this pregnancy off on a healthy track is being sidelined. The Doc said no more running until the cysts are gone. I wasn't going crazy with the exercise, but I love cold weather running so I've been out a couple times a week. It looks like I might need to learn to love cold weather walking instead, at least for a little while.
I must say, a girl could get used to weekly ultrasounds - it's definitely a good way to calm the nerves. I go again next Tuesday when we'll hopefully hear the heartbeat, and I can't wait!! In the meantime, I'm really going to make a concerted effort to not over analyze everything and remain calm. We'll see how well that works...
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Excitement might be creeping in
Thanks for all the congrats!!
As I mentioned, I'm scheduled for my first u/s next Tuesday. Until then I'm using my IUI date to figure how far along I am. Which means today I'm 4w4d. This is when it all went bad last time. Hubby and I were in Cabo with four other couples and I saw the first sign of spotting. I tried not to panic, but I'm not a spotter and never have been. It got heavier and then the cramping started. I knew even before I bought a test at some random drugstore. The test confirmed what I feared - it was negative.
I try not to think about that experience, but today it's front and center in my mind. I'm starting to let myself get a little excited, but don't want to set myself up for disappointment. I'm still having some cramping, but not as much as the past few days. Absolutely no spotting - and believe me I'm examining for the tiniest of color change. I'm hoping if I can get through today without anything bad happening, I'll start to relax a little more.
Hubby has been working some long days, so we haven't had a chance to really spend time together since the weekend when we were both still in shock. I mentioned that my betas were pretty high which could mean twinsies. I think we're both ok with that. At this point, we just want everything to be ok and will deal with any unexpected (yet pleasant) surprises that may show up.
There was one point when I woke up this morning that I thought to myself "huh, I'm pregnant" and then I smiled. I think it's the cautious excitement creeping further and further into my head. I kind of like it!
As I mentioned, I'm scheduled for my first u/s next Tuesday. Until then I'm using my IUI date to figure how far along I am. Which means today I'm 4w4d. This is when it all went bad last time. Hubby and I were in Cabo with four other couples and I saw the first sign of spotting. I tried not to panic, but I'm not a spotter and never have been. It got heavier and then the cramping started. I knew even before I bought a test at some random drugstore. The test confirmed what I feared - it was negative.
I try not to think about that experience, but today it's front and center in my mind. I'm starting to let myself get a little excited, but don't want to set myself up for disappointment. I'm still having some cramping, but not as much as the past few days. Absolutely no spotting - and believe me I'm examining for the tiniest of color change. I'm hoping if I can get through today without anything bad happening, I'll start to relax a little more.
Hubby has been working some long days, so we haven't had a chance to really spend time together since the weekend when we were both still in shock. I mentioned that my betas were pretty high which could mean twinsies. I think we're both ok with that. At this point, we just want everything to be ok and will deal with any unexpected (yet pleasant) surprises that may show up.
There was one point when I woke up this morning that I thought to myself "huh, I'm pregnant" and then I smiled. I think it's the cautious excitement creeping further and further into my head. I kind of like it!
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Wow, this is real
I went in for beta #2 this morning. The office just called and my number more than doubled. I went from 307 to 627. I've been scheduled for my first ultrasound next Tuesday, 1/11/11. I'm doubtful we'll be able to hear a heartbeat then since I'll only be 5w3d so I don't think I'll bring Hubby with me. Honestly, I'm scared I won't make it to that appointment. I'm still really nervous that this all going to go away. I want to be soooo excited and relax and enjoy this, but I keep thinking about what happened last time and how quickly it all disappeared.
I've been having a lot of cramping the last couple of days with some intermittent lower back pain. The cramping has been bearable, except one point last night when it woke me up. I contemplated taking a Tylenol for it, but after about 15 minutes it went away and I fell back asleep. I asked the nurse about it and she said it's nothing to worry about unless it's accompanied by bleeding (which is hasn't been). Of course I know all this, but it's always comforting to hear it from the nurse anyway.
In other news, I ended up working at the office for 12 hours on Sunday. It was worth it - the client was very pleased with our concepts yesterday morning, which in turn made my bosses very pleased with me. The only downside is today feels like Wednesday instead of Tuesday. My head keeps telling me I've already worked two full days. I think it's going to be a l-o-n-g week!
I've been having a lot of cramping the last couple of days with some intermittent lower back pain. The cramping has been bearable, except one point last night when it woke me up. I contemplated taking a Tylenol for it, but after about 15 minutes it went away and I fell back asleep. I asked the nurse about it and she said it's nothing to worry about unless it's accompanied by bleeding (which is hasn't been). Of course I know all this, but it's always comforting to hear it from the nurse anyway.
In other news, I ended up working at the office for 12 hours on Sunday. It was worth it - the client was very pleased with our concepts yesterday morning, which in turn made my bosses very pleased with me. The only downside is today feels like Wednesday instead of Tuesday. My head keeps telling me I've already worked two full days. I think it's going to be a l-o-n-g week!
Thursday, December 2, 2010
My brain is killing me
Today is 11dpiui and I'm starting to go a little nuts. I've been overanalyzing every twinge, pinch, tweak, twist, soreness and tickle for the past three days. I mentioned to hubby last night that I really, really wanted to POAS this morning (Sidebar: The one time I did get a BFP it first showed up 11dpo. It was faint but visible enough that both hubby and I saw it). He took one look at me, said no and walked out of the room. He knows me too well. If he had even wavered in his answer for one second, I would have took that to mean it was OK. What I didn't tell him is that I POAS Tuesday night while he was out of town (9dpiui, and Wednesday was his birthday...wouldn't it have been a great birthday present to tell him we got a BFP?!?!) But I know I was bad, bad, bad. I couldn't help myself. The Ovidrel was out of my system by that point so I figured why not? I swear I saw the faintest of faint lines, but I'm almost positive that I willed the line to be there and in reality it was too early to show up.
Now I'm scared to go to the bathroom for fear of what lurks on the TP when I wipe. My last few cycles have only had 10-11 day luteal phases, so I'm definitely in the midst of the danger zone. But this is my first cycle with progesterone during the luteal phase, so I really don't know what to expect.
In the interest of trying to keep what little sanity I have left this cycle, I'm going to live in my fairytale land and pretend that all the little twinges and pinches I'm feeling are just my ute stretching for the baby that's burrowing in for the next nine months. Because if I think anything else right now I just might lose my shit!
Now I'm scared to go to the bathroom for fear of what lurks on the TP when I wipe. My last few cycles have only had 10-11 day luteal phases, so I'm definitely in the midst of the danger zone. But this is my first cycle with progesterone during the luteal phase, so I really don't know what to expect.
In the interest of trying to keep what little sanity I have left this cycle, I'm going to live in my fairytale land and pretend that all the little twinges and pinches I'm feeling are just my ute stretching for the baby that's burrowing in for the next nine months. Because if I think anything else right now I just might lose my shit!
Monday, November 15, 2010
The Doc knows best?
I went in for monitoring and u/s this morning. The right side still seems to be pretty quiet but the left side has two decent follies - 13mm and 14mm.
My last cycle I started on 75iu for the first five days then the Doc upped it to 112.5iu for the last three days before I triggered. I expected a similar situation this cycle since I responded well last time (4 on the left over 18mm and one on the right). Given the less than stellar performance of my follies this morning I expected to be told to up the dosage tonight and tomorrow before my Wednesday check-in. Nope! I'm supposed to continue with the 75iu and see where things are on Wednesday.
I'm a little frustrated but trying to remember that the Doc has a reason for keeping things low. I was in a meeting when the nurse called so she left me a voice mail. It's too late to call the office back now which means I can't find out the bloodwork numbers. Maybe that has something to do with the continued low dose? Maybe I'm over thinking things (I do have a *tiny* tendency to over think)? Maybe I should just relax and be thankful I have two follies that are progressing? Yeah, that's what I'll (try) to do.
My last cycle I started on 75iu for the first five days then the Doc upped it to 112.5iu for the last three days before I triggered. I expected a similar situation this cycle since I responded well last time (4 on the left over 18mm and one on the right). Given the less than stellar performance of my follies this morning I expected to be told to up the dosage tonight and tomorrow before my Wednesday check-in. Nope! I'm supposed to continue with the 75iu and see where things are on Wednesday.
I'm a little frustrated but trying to remember that the Doc has a reason for keeping things low. I was in a meeting when the nurse called so she left me a voice mail. It's too late to call the office back now which means I can't find out the bloodwork numbers. Maybe that has something to do with the continued low dose? Maybe I'm over thinking things (I do have a *tiny* tendency to over think)? Maybe I should just relax and be thankful I have two follies that are progressing? Yeah, that's what I'll (try) to do.
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