i miss ms yong. the sweetest nicest best dance teacher i've ever had.
one last look at her during the holidays. boohoohoo...





















sigh. i miss my grandmother too.

i have the right to be angry, i'm in the position to be angry, but i can't be. i can only be frustrated, and see my life being masterminded by someone so insignificant. the irony...
i empathise those in the same plight as me.
i must have owed that someone something in my past life, to be so mentally tortured by h...
i want to dislike you.
but i can't. I CAN'T.
this is the best way to torture us. isn't it? you are good. good.
i pity you, but at the same time i pity us more. i understand, but do you?

mr seed


he's going to get fried soon. :)

i never knew it was so hard to part with someone you truly love. it's tormenting to the soul. the coffin went in SO SLOWLY i wanted to hit whoever did that. it was so heart-breaking to see your loved one go in so slowly to get burnt into ashes. no more. just a jar of ashes. the person i once hugged, touched and smiled at is gone forever. what's left is just the jar of ashes. that person is non-existent anymore, other than in my heart. how saddening it is! it was so slow everyone couldn't take it we cried. everyone of us.

i'm glad i have all my cousins with me in this together. we supported one another, hugged each other, comforted each other. somehow she has made us grown so much... so much closer. i love her so much, and all my cousins and aunties and uncles. we really became each other's pillar of support in this hard period of time. i will forever love her, and them.

i want to tell my friends to not worry about me any more, because i'm in the midst of getting over everything that has happened and is happening. i will be alright soon. love you people..yup.

sigh. i really have to thank you all alot for your condolences and encouraging words to make me feel a little not too sad. i just came back from my grandmother's funeral. i cried a lot today. a little too much. i think it's a sudden outburst of sadness and tears because i've been suppressing my emotions and telling myself not to cry since yesterday. i will take it easy, but it's really difficult not to cry, even though i know my grandmother won't want to see me like this. my heart is in grief.

please give me some more time.

thank you cheryl, julianah, eileen, rina, xiaohui, jancy, cynthia, kenny, pak, daowei, shalini and all of you for your concern and consoling words and sweet eileen and rina who offered to visit my grandmother. thanks alot and i really appreciate it. all of you, all those who care for me and whom i care for, all of my friends, are very important to me and i hold you dearer than myself...

Rest in peace. i know you're in good hands.

When you're sound asleep in your dreams, my grandmother was struggling in her sleep. The will to live. Her mouth was trembling, and her eyes were fluttering. but i was told she was asleep. She must be fighting against those who want to take her away. My sister and I rushed down at 8.15 and reached there at 8.45. All of them had tears welling up in their eyes, and their noses were red. I managed to keep mine from flowing out of the rim of my eyes. My grandmother is in ICU now. I want to pray but I don't know who to pray to. She's the only grandparent i have.

grandmama, i love you. i hope my love, together with everyone's, will see you through.

highlight to go over the words in the box. =)

wanqi -- [noun]: An alien 'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

so true...

jared mathias -- [noun]: An alien 'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

EVEN more true...
we're the same =)


haha ermm today julianah cynthia constance and luan xiang came my house to do project work. haha yay finally all five of us are present man! woohoo! i really hope we can do a good job. hehh =))

oh ya... yesterday couldn't make it for the chalet. i slept from 3.25 to 4.35. i was supposed to get ready and take the bus, but i was so tired to get out of the sofa i msged cheryl and bertram to tell them i ain't going anymore =( then i went to sleep again at 4.45 haha. then i woke up at 10.45!!! omg i got a shock. i wonder how come suddenly i was so tired. oh well but anw i hope cheryl won't be angry with me. i think she isn't ba heehee.
i hope to see you guys in september! really really xD then i'll be all perked up. haha oh so much homework. i love homework! haha trying to psycho myself la...
pak so funny eh (:

i love hugging aileen. she makes me feel loved. chest to chest. so big and so tight. giving IS really receiving. because when i reached out my arms to want to hug her, she hugged back and it really made me feel comfort. i don't like hugs when hands only touch the shoulders. no point of hugging at all. =S

i don't like *erhem* really. disgusting. yuck. one-sided friendship. haha yeah. sian. ugh. whatever. no mood man. aiyah. just get lost. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH (screaming to vent my frustrations)

the only way to having true friends is to treat them with sincerity from the bottom of your heart. people will then come to you, because you have reached out to them first.