Still Here

I stopped writing.  I just ran out of anything new to say.  Time keeps moving and nothing has really changed.  I still miss my son and am still fighting to give my other son a life he deserves.  Have you ever wanted a change, but not sure what it would be?  I just need a change...a real vacation, a date, a good laugh?  Any of those would do I guess. 

I feel like I have failed in so many ways, but oddly, I have managed to succeed in a few others.  I have given him a home and I know he loves it here.  I love being his person.  If that is all I have, that will always be enough.  He is all that matters.

Monkey gave me some advice last night that I will carry always.  "Mommy, just be brave."  So little, but so wise.