Darger

I've been putting some of my music up on band camp! Check it out. And you should know that I can see whenever someone skips a song without finishing it. I KNOW.

The Lobster and the Crab

a fable by Arnold Lobel

On a stormy day, the Crab went strolling along the beach. He was surprised to see the Lobster preparing to set sail in his boat.

"Lobster," said the Crab, "it is foolhardy to venture out on a day like this."

"Perhaps so," said the Lobster, "but I love a squall at sea!"

"I will come with you," said the Crab. "I will not let you face such danger alone."

The Lobster and the Crab began their voyage. Soon they found themselves far from shore. Their boat was tossed and buffeted by the turbulent waters.

"Crab!" shouted the Lobster above the roar of the wind. "For me, the splashing of the salt spray is thrilling! The crashing of every wave takes my breath away!"

"Lobster, I think we are sinking," cried the Crab.

"Yes, of course we are sinking," said the Lobster. "This old boat is full of holes. Have courage, my friend. Remember, we are both creatures of the sea."

The little boat capsized and sank.

"Horrors!" cried the Crab.

"Down we go!" shouted the Lobster.

The Crab was shaken and upset. The Lobster took him for a relaxing walk along the ocean floor.

"How brave we are," said the Lobster. "What a wonderful adventure we have had!"

The Crab began to feel somewhat better. Although he usually enjoyed a quieter existence, he had to admit that the day had been pleasantly out of the ordinary.

–––––––––––––––––––

Even the taking of small risks will add excitement to life.

I Love June 10th

Yesterday was rotten. It really was. June ninth is rotten every year because it is the anniversary of my brother's death, but yesterday was extra much so.

It started out a fairly promising day, for a June 9th. I had this job interview last week and yesterday I had a series of assignments to complete within a time frame of three hours as part of the application process. So I was maybe a little anxiety riddled because of that, but it's an exciting thing!

But then this happened. It was the kids' first day at the YMCA day care and they effing lost Amby. They found him (he had gone with a field trip group to a skating rink in another part of the county!) and it all worked out fine. But it's absolutely not ok and the folks there had no explanation. James ended up going to the Y and withdrawing both children from the program.

And then as more of like a minor thing to top it off, I had a somewhat emotional discussion with someone very dear to me about something we don't see eye to eye on. But that's not a negative thing because I think we're better for it.

Anyway, June 10th, I'm all yours!

in Just- spring

Today started out drizzly and cold. Not sweatshirt cold, just not the muggy heat you'd expect this time of year. It was all gray and green and urging us to get muddy. So we went to the woods.

We went off trail and the kids played in a shady, muddy creek. Bea wore jeans and water boots, but waded in way past the boot tops. Amby wore jeans and crocs and got fully soaked. I know that wet jeans are miserable. But they aren't as bad as poison ivy. Also, as irrational as it might seem, the more skin that's covered, the less afraid of snakes I tend to be. We didn't see any water moccasins and maybe the precautions were unnecessary, but I'm a careful-ish mama.

We hiked through the woods and saw the mountain laurel in bloom. We found a moss-covered clearing with a crumbling altar off to one side of it. We found a rustic gazebo covered in professions of love. Everything was so idyllic, I could almost hear a Miyazaki-esque soundtrack in my mind's ear.

When we got back to the car, the children were covered in mud. They washed (sort of?) in the river and I stripped them for the ride home. I was so tired, I was sure they would immediately nap. Oh, but it doesn't work that way.

*     *     *

To tie it all up with a nice bow at the end of the day, we started our new bedtime story, Howl's Moving Castle.

Sober

If turning 30 isn't enough, I'll tell you what is. Being cast as Juliet's freaking mother. That's enough to stop a girl in her tracks.

I'm going to be in a production of R&J done in the "drive-by" style. No rehearsal, the one and only performance just a week after getting our parts, lots of booze.

But I'll be sober because booze would only make it that much harder to remember my lines.

Sick Days

The kids started school a few weeks ago. Yes, in the middle of the second half of the school year. We'd been on the waiting list a while. They've been sick on and off all these weeks. It's the first time they've been exposed to germs. I guess their immune systems aren't what they oughta be. I guess I should've nursed them longer.

We were up most of last night. It was messy and noisy and adorable, as illustrated by these truly terrible photobooth family selfies. (At one point I needed to take a breather and I left Bea with my laptop. She took about 50 selfies! They are so good. I almost want to get her a phone just so she can have her own instagram. But not.)

There are two built-in beds in this room. Bea "slept" in one and Amby was in the other. I started out with Amby. There was a strange moment in the night when I realized that the extremely comfortable warmth was also wet. And it took me a beat or so to decide to get out of it. 

One of My (many) Favorites

tutorial

I Was Mean to You Today

by Pat Schneider

Things were difficult
and I was impatient.
You were trying to explain
why I must reorganize the files
on my computer, why
they all have to have project numbers,
why I can't put them
where they've always been,
what the tax consultant said,
what you need for your report
to the Board of Directors,
and it boiled down to my files
have to be re-filed, and they
have to have titles with no more
than twelve letters to leave room
for project numbers,
and I said, Well, dammit.
And you said, Don't talk like that.

You sounded pained
and I was mean to you.
I was bored and tired
and mad, and you were
trying hard. Later,
I went out in the rain.
I went to the mall
and bought us both really
expensive pillows. Down
pillows with 100 per cent
cotton covers, 400 thread count.
I have lusted after them for years,
ever since Mama told me
that she asked Grandma,
who was 86 and dying,
"If you could have anything
in the world, what would it be?"
and Grandma answered,
"A down pillow" and Mama
didn't have enough money.
I bought two down pillows for us all,
to say I'm, sorry.