I read my previous posts and sadly, there is nothing I can be proud of. Hah, I finally understand what Shanny means.
'Won't You hold me, pull me just a little bit closer"
Anthem Lights - I can't get over You
I am going to get their album. =)
I thought I had wasted my last 6 months; I couldn't understand His plans. Then in December, I understood.
The first 3 months was spent to overcome the emotions and recalling the lessons I learnt when I worked and also absorbed all the essence of the lessons and dig real deep into His word. On the forth month, I tried to put His words into use after He instructed me to move. On the fifth month I moved. Then during the sixth month, He gave me the interpretation of the dream I had in June and a closure to my friend's death.
When I wanted to share with the church what I had learnt, there was no chance. Turns out He wanted to show me more before I shared. Then comes Rach's church event... where there was a funeral for Danny in the story... I cried thinking of her but it was tears of joy and victory, not those of anger and hatred like those when I was 15.
I can only thank Him and her. I wonder.. Will you appear again after you finish your task for me? Shall I ask Sok to join me to visit you this year? It had been such a long time..
Who can I blame for who I am now? Who can I blame for how I behave now?
I realise I can't blame anyone anymore, all I want now is to strive forward and towards You. That's all I want.
Anger ceased.
Thank You.
Just like what I had told a cell member, I felt like I had munched enough, I need to bite and chew for I had turned from a toddler to a young adult. Hehs. I still need You and Your grace to grow because I know I will still stumble because human fall short. Stay with me okay? Stay with me.
Next phrase.
Won't You hold me, pull me just a little bit closer...
