Facebook accountability

I hear a lot of moms talk about how Facebook is incredibly addictive and has ruined their parenting skills, one status update at a time. How they need to take a break and "unplug" for weeks at a time to decompress from the tight grip of a social media hold. I understand what they are saying to an extent but I do not fully agree with them. Yes, facebook is addictive. Yes, we have grown as a society to rely upon social media in place of face to face contact. Yes all of this does have its downside. But that IS our way of life now. This is how we communicate as a society. This is our world. And we don't have to just be glued to the computer or phones all day. There can be a happy medium. We can be status update obsessed and still lead productive and healthy lives with our children.

I personally have found facebook to aid in parenting. How, you might ask. Well, all of my friends and family are on facebook. From my childhood friend that I have known since I was a mere few months old to my grandmother to my old boss. Everyone that has crossed my life path is somehow or someway active in social media. My main source of contact to those I know is via the internet and social media outlets. It makes life easy to be able to communicate this way. And not only easy, it can be instant and up to the minute for those googly family eyes who want to see the youngest generation of our family in active bloom.

I utilize facebook to communicate to those I love across the world about my life and the life of my children. I upload pictures, talk about the happenings of potty training and other absurd things that occur during the day. I rattle off status updates about craft projects or dinner plans or ideas I have for myself and my family. I tell tales of the latest spot to hit with my mommy group or the few and far between Hot date night spots I hit with my husband. My status updates are basically a quick outline of my life and how it is playing out at any given moment.

In return my friends and family on facebook hold me accountable to the things I post. If I state that Big Sis DIVA will be marble painting this afternoon, someone WILL comment on my wall and ask how it went. If I spill the beans on what I plan to serve at dinner, someone will wander over to my husbands wall or mine and ask how dinner was. If I really like a new website or product or really despise the like, I share it with my friends and family via facebook. Instantly they too can know that those new cookies are disgusting but that ugly show feels fabulous while chasing toddler for 3 hours at the park of my tired sore momma feet.

In the same way that many parents go on and on about how facebook eats up all their time, how they sit around just playing on facebook and forgetting they have children, I can go on and on about how find it a useful tool for me. I find it keeps me in check. I use it to get myself out of bed and to make sure I do not drift off to couchland. If I status update something, I follow through, so that my family and friends around the globe can read and see in pictures the smiles on my kids face as I do all I can to be the best mom I can be. I make sure that if I state marble painting is on the agenda for my kids then by days end there are pictures of masterpieces made by Big Sis DIVA and a smile to accompany it hitting the facebook stream, in response to my earlier status updates, for those on my friends list to gawk at.

I enjoy sharing little tidbits throughout the day with folks and engaging in simple and fun conversations. Sometimes these conversations are the only adult contact I might have for the day and it is welcomed. I don't live on the computer or phone either. I simply update my status and check in throughout the day while my kids are occupied or when I find a quiet 30 seconds alone. And in that 30 seconds I am able to "Talk" to an adult, regroup as a mom and move on to the next engaging toddler filled fun that I promised my kids via a Facebook status. So, in that respect I love Facebook and its addictive properties.

High Traffic leads to high pre-term birth rate?

Of course as I sit here terrified of impending pre term birth of Critter2 what do I do? Not look at cute happy youtube videos or read my e-books. Nope. I surf the web for all kinds of scary stories of preterm birth. MOMS. We are masochists I tell you! Crazed people who always have to know the worse possible outcome...but only so we can be supermoms and be super prepared, right? I happened across this article about a connection between high traffic roads and preterm birth and thought it interesting. Personally, I do not think that traffic levels play a factor, all by itself. But I do think that people living in higher population volume areas could be at risk for a variety of factors. Pollution, stress and exposure to illness to name a few. However, this study, although interesting does not make me think that the freeway 4 miles from me is going to make my babies come any sooner than they should. In fact it may slow them down given the crazy traffic here in the Houston area. KIDDING!! What do you think?

Breast Feeding Dolls?

A friend of mine shared a link to this article on facebook. After reading the article and then taking a surf around the website that makes this product, I find my self more and more appalled. Is this for real? A breast feeding doll?

Now, many of you know my thoughts on the boob feeding situation. I am all for it. I look forward to giving it a try with Critter2, but I am not a bad mom for allowing formula supplements in, or if Critter2 is not a boob gal switching altogether. I know the debate is long going that "breast is best", but in reality just providing your child with the proper nutrition is really what is best. Boob or bottle.

So back to this doll. I have no problem with an older sibling picking up a baby doll and mimicking mommy. And who cares if the older sibling is male or female, its a learning process for our tots. I, do however, think this doll is ridiculous on a number of levels.

The website boasts information about why this doll is a must have. One particular section frustrates me to no end. The section entitled "Why little girls NEED to learn to breastfeed." It leads with "little girls need to learn to breastfeed". No, they don't. They need to learn from young adulthood proper nutrition and the proper way to get it for themselves and to provide it for their child. However at 3 and 4 years old all I want my child to do is eat the peas off her plate and play pretend diaper changes with her doll, i expect no more and no less. She is a CHILD. Mimicking my behavior is one thing. Allowing a baby doll to suckle her 4 year old undeveloped woman areas is a little un-called for.

Allowing little girls to grow up their entire life with the knowledge that ONLY breast is best is horrific. What if the little girl grows up and her milk does not come in post birth? What if she is sick and can not breastfeed? What if, God forbid, her child is ill and breast milk, or bottle milk for that matter, is just not an option at the beginning?

I know from personal experience as well as watching my personal friends go through torture that not being able to breastfeed your child because of situations out of your control, with the constant demand of society to do so, it only leads to feelings of inadequacy. Instead of feeling glorious about this new life your are holding, loving and nurturing with the nutrients it needs to grow into a thriving adult via formula, a woman is then forced to sob and feel like a failure because she is unable to provide "breast is best" to her new baby. When really she is providing what is best to her child, nutrition is the best way possible! She is a fabulous mom, but not by society standards.

Instead of teaching our children that only one way is best, let us teach them the overall goal and show them various options to reach that goal. Let us allow them to use their minds and imaginations and pick up their own baby dolls and mimic mommy breast feeding or bottle feeding. Let them build these concepts on their own and learn and ask questions and investigate childhood through the eyes of a child. Then as their parent is is our duty to provide them with ALL the information they need to be better informed individuals as they grow into adults. Let us allow them to be children and not thrust more and more adult centered behaviors upon them, no matter how natural it may or may not be.

Boob Feeding pups

I am all for Boob feeding. In fact, when Critter2 makes her grand debut I would like to give this whole boob feeding idea a go. Baby DIVA was not boob fed due to medical restriction on my part, so this is new territory for me. And therefore I have been actively doing a little momma research. I have found that I am a middle of the road boob feed activist. I do think it is wonderful for your baby, but it isn't the only way to feed a baby. I do believe there are benefits, but there is nothing wrong with a child who is formula fed either, they benefit as well.

I also think that although natural, boob feeding is a private intimate time between mother and child and should be should be done in a tasteful manner while in public. I do not think I personally will be whipping out a boob and letting it freely loose while my baby crawls on the floor and I chat with friends at a coffee shop, until she is hungry. Not my thing. My boobs like to stay private, thank you. I heard someone once say in reference to boob feeding that "yes, it is natural. But so is going poo. I'm not going to take a giant poo out in public just because it is natural. No, I will do it discreetly." That description has stuck with me and I agree with it whole hearted.

I have read the pros and cons and arguments for and against. I follow those advocates who think breastfeeding is the only way,Breast is best, and I also follow those who think formula feeding is the only way, and I find myself somewhere in the middle. Both ways provide for your child and as the mother of that child you have the right to decide what is best. Although before the birth of Critter2 I am certain I want her to be a boob fed gal, that does not guarantee me that outcome. Perhaps my boobs wont work, perhaps she wont take to boob milk, perhaps she will. I think as a mom you must also enter this flexible and willing to make changes as needed to provide your child with the best for her, whatever those needs may be. I really enjoy reading all the various points of view, from the extreme pro boob to the anti boob on this matter, because the more knowledge I gain the better mother I can be to Baby DIVA and Critter2. Seeing the vast possibilities ensures me Critter2 and I will find a common ground somewhere that meets both our needs, mostly hers.

Now, all that being said, I also come across weirdo folks out there in the world who do some strange things, it tickles me so and grosses me out. I don't agree with boob feeding children old enough to ask for a drink. I think its gross and there are no benefits at that point. I also find that post milk production, some women do some really bizarre things with their "girls."

Check out this lady who breastfeeds her dog. Yes, my friends, she lets her doggie latch her boobie and drink her milk, because she misses the bond of having her child do so. Ummm NO! This is crazy. Breast is best taken too far! I almost barfed.

Demanding rewards and Fake Kidnappings

My mom's phone went missing the other day while we were out and about. Sucked. But we did what we could to try and find it and then headed to the cell phone store to get a replacement. Mom had the old phone disconnected and off we went with her new toy. C'est la vie.

A few hours later I received a call on my cell phone from a number I didn't recognize. Normally I do not answer such calls, but something beckoned me to take this call. On the other end of the line was a gentleman claiming to have found a blackberry. I said "wonderful, shall we meet so we can get it back?". "No", He told me. "what is the reward?

Shocked. I told him there wasn't a reward we just wanted the phone back. He then told me "he wasted his time and his day finding this phone" and demanded a reward. He was heading into a belligerent context so I just hung up the phone. Asshole.

It bothered me. I found it quite unsettling that another person could find a lost item, such as a cell phone, that we all know is an important item to its owner in this day an age, and be such a disgusting human being about it. Calling the rightful owner and demanding a reward. I don't know about you but I was raised that you treat others with respect. You treat others as you yourself would like to be treated. And if there is a reward you graciously accept or decline, you NEVER demand compensation for helping someone else. In the great scheme of things, the reward itself is helping out a fellow person.

But then what am I to expect in a society that finds paying for a fake kidnapping to be an acceptable form of pastime or a acceptable gift for those who are just too hard to buy for.

It is not even Halloween yet!!!

This really really irks me! I am so tired of seeing this year after year and earlier and earlier.

At the Grocery store yesterday, Pumpkins and Christmas BLEH!!!

I do not want to see Christmas crap out on shelves or decorations in stores inside or out until we are at least nearing Thanksgiving. The retail industry is killing the magic of the holidays. How can a tiny tot find a super cool fabulously decorated store special during those magical days before Christmas, if they have been looking at the decorations for months along side of pumpkins, gremlins and turkeys?

Give me a break people. Wait another few weeks, PLEASE!!!! Sales for Christmas can not be that exuberant in the month of October. Those who are already buying for the holidays, I am sure have already been buying all year and are in the process of crafting, not hanging wreaths on their door today!!

Does this bother you? Do you think the retail industry kills the magic? When do you think the stores should bring out Christmas items and decorate their buildings?

6 Month Meat?

Don't get me wrong, sometimes I am pressed for time and want to scoot my mom ride thru the drive at the local fast food getaway to feed my Baby DIVA, self and H4L. I know it makes me a terrible mom, pumping my kid full of french fries deep fried in a cooker by some pimply teen, but hey a mom has got to do what a mom has got to do, right? And we all know that there are days that those fries are as good as it is gonna get. I always feel incredibly guilty after loading my kid up on fast fries, or perhaps its is just the rumblings in my tummy from the grease and preservatives, whatever it is, now after hearing about McDonald's 6 month old un-aged meal, I am even more disgusted than ever.
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Sally Davies , a photographer who lives close to a McDonald's, purchased a happy meal 6 months ago, in April 2010, brought it home and placed it on a white china plate. She intended to take a picture everyday as the decomposing process set in. A project stemmed from an article she found online about a 12 year old burger that was still kicking it. You can see this project, and all the photographic details HERE, as well as her other works which happen to be pretty cool.

I can tell you that my daughter will probably still have a fast food something here or there in her lifetime, I can not stop that. What I can do though, is look at this project and each time I am feeling lazy remember that not only is the fast food lifestyle unhealthy, but do I really want my child, myself and my H4L to be eating foods that never decompose, never break down, never go away. Not really. Instead I will try and take my lazy butt home, down a red bull, (cause they are healthy right?) and cook up something that possibly will decompose and release those nutrients into my family and keep THEM kicking for years to come, instead of keeping that nasty burger kicking for years.

Recalls

Recalls.

I am so tired of hearing about RECALLS. It seems like every single day, I catch wind of yet another recall for this or that. Lead based paint on toys, Spinach, Over-the-counter medicines. Seriously, it is getting out of control.

At first glance, I find myself wondering as to how in the world the quality assurance personnel of these major named companies are allowing products to enter into mainstream consumer hands, if there are so many problems. My own career background, pre Baby DIVA and the pink hair of course, was a career based in quality assurance. Knowing the workings of a quality assurance process leaves me wanting to know more and more as to why this continues to be a recurrent problem in our world. But this problem also allows me speculate that the personnel who release these items into the custody of the general public, might in fact be doing their job correctly and efficiently. Could it possibly be that we have a giant out pouring of persons, moms, dads, loud mouths, who are crying wolf at any opportunity they can?

Let us look at the most current recall issued by Fisher Price, just this week. I have a particular interest in the recall that states "Children can fall on or against the pegs...resulting in injuries or lacerations." This is in reference to the Healthy Clean, Easy Care High chair. So, basically this product is being recalled because a child might fall down and get hurt because he or she bumps into it, in simple terms. Well if we put this behavior into practice on all products, we may as well go ahead and start a recall on all walls, floors, toes, empty air. I mean, my kid trips and falls into things all the time; and sometimes she gets an ouch. It happens. Do I like it? NO! But it happens. It is not the tile on my floor who is at fault if she falls and busts her lip. Shoot it is not even her fault. It is an accident. A simple oops that occurs in every day life. I don't call up the President of
Tile world demanding to be compensated immediately because my kid tripped.


I do not want to down play Recalls by any means. There is substantial evidence for many recalls that amounts to a necessity for a product to be recalled. However, I think many recalls (especially in recent months) are based on the fear of the company. The fear the company has of mouthy consumers who cry out as loud as possible for the slightest reasons, who have some how lost sight that occasionally growing up kids get injured, minor injuries of course is what I am talking about. A bump here, a bruise there and sometimes a cut here. But these are all part of the learning process. These little moments when a child walks too close to a sharp edge or is running in house and falls down and bumps his or her head; they are all learning opportunities for the child. Times that the parents then can step in and "Parent" the child. Remind the child that running in the house is not allowed because sometimes we fall down and get hurt. And then we help our child get up and move on. We don't teach him to destroy the floor that he fell on. We don't teach him to wallow in his bruise and place the blame of his fall on the person who designed and built that piece of flooring, god knows how long ago. No, we teach him to watch his step and gain the knowledge that this type of behavior and activity can sometimes cause a bad outcome.

Perhaps instead of utilizing so much effort, energy and time in trying to point blame at a large named company for little Johnny"s little scrape, we should instead "recall" ourselves as parents and learn how to parent and take care of our children again. We should grasp the concept that WE are the parents, not the product designers and marketing departments. We police our children and keep them safe, not the marketing department or factory rollout that makes the toys. We need to re-learn how to teach our children to learn from their mistakes and boo boo's in life. Teach our children that sometimes we do fall down, and when we do many times there is no one else to blame but ourselves. And when we fall, we get up and keep going.

Candy and diapers?

I understand marketing. I even find some marketing to be quite lovely. I do not mind being persuaded to buy this or that by an ad here or there, because I know I am smart enough to not fall for an illusion, I am smart enough to take in the advertising for what it is worth and still use my own mind to make a conscious decision if the product is right for me or not. I enjoy seeing the artistic side of advertising, whether it be the actual art, the writing and all the other skills that go into influencing the mass population. What I do not like one bit is tacky, malicious marketing behavior. Trickery used in trying to make a sale. Acts that are aimed at ultimately causing harm, no matter how slight the harm may be, really leave a bad taste in my mouth.

Enter me, a mom, in a local grocery store. I am a woman who tries to provide her family with the best products out there that nourish the body and mind. I do this by using coupons in order to "nourish" our bank account. I also try and "nourish" public spaces by maintaining a well behaved child through proper discipline techniques and a smattering of love and affection of course. It infuriates me to know end when I happen across a marketing technique in a store that is just preposterous.

This week I slid my buggy down the aisle at Kroger, the aisle mind you that contained the Baby products. You know. Butt Paste, smashed up food, diapers. The necessities. Baby DIVA was casually directing me from her perch in the buggy too. I was horrified to discover that the opposite side of the Baby Product aisle housed nothing other than ALL the candy the store had to offer.

What moron in the marketing or store design team would do this? Sure it might boost candy sales, but the trade off is a significant loss. A screaming child being pushed around in the buggy by a flustered parent because said parent has to navigate an entire grocery store aisle while screeching "no" to a begging child for a piece of candy, can almost certainly result in a pissed off customer, who will not return to your store. Not to mention all the other customers who are then forced to listen to annoying cries of a strangers kid who is whining for candy all because some idiot decided it would be a great sale boosting plan to put candy on an aisle that parents most certainly will have to take kids down. And let us not even touch on the fact that America has an obesity problem and so lets go ahead and start shoving candy influences down their throats from infancy. Way to go team! My "nourishing" nature of my family and those around me were instantly shot to crap.

Smooth move guys!

Katy Perry update

I just found this to be amusing...

It now seems that all those parents who so quickly and eagerly began to bash Katy Perry earlier this week (must be that coffee break was over and they began watch and think using their own minds) in her Sesame Street bit with Elmo, have now begun to reconsider. It seems many moms are now saying, well at second look it is no so bad, perhaps it IS just a costume.

Newsy.com has provided THIS clip about the reactions to the mommy squeals. What do you think now? Has your views changed?

Katy Perry and Self Image

All over the mom circuit today, I have been hearing complaints and trash talking about the Katy Perry Sesame Street video clip that hit YouTube. I just read an article stating that her clip, to air this season on Sesame Street has now been pulled after moms united and raised hell saying her clothing was too racy and would give their tots the wrong self image. So I went on over to YouTube and had myself a little watch, just to see what all the fuss was about.

GIVE ME A BREAK PEOPLE!

I am a mom of a daughter. I watched the video and whoop do freaking do. She is dressed up as a pixie princess type chick singing with Elmo. How about this for thought...all those moms that spent so much time today YouTube watching and complaining about how their child's self image is going to be put in jeopardy; how about these women take that same amount of time to learn how to promote positive self images of their children when faced with media influences that steer towards a potential negative self image influence. And instead of watching the video over and over, spend that time with their daughters. Teach them not to be followers. Teach them to be able to decipher what trash is from treasure and to treat themselves with respect. Give them the foundation to be able to recognize and make GOOD positive informed choices for themselves in regards to the negative influences that will in fact be thrust at them on a daily basis.

The world is not a sugar free candy coated playground with no sharp edges. Although we do not need to thrust negative self image material in our children's faces, we do need to expose them to it while we can help them learn from it. We must not shelter our children as this will only result in horrific outcomes. We need to teach our children from early on to have self respect. And something as minor as Katy Perry wearing a pixie fairy outfit on Sesame Street singing a catching tune with Elmo seems like a good enough spot to start.

Haven't seen it? Watch it and let me know what you think?

Baby Bikini??

H4L heard a snazzy little blurb on his morning commute radio show, Roula and Ryan this morning. They were discussing this certain clothing website and whether or not it was a joke or in fact real clothes. He arrived at work and had a look at the website. He told me later that he was “appalled” at what he saw and then sent a link to me to see what I had to say about it.

I quickly pulled up the website, Babikini and found something incredibly horrifying. Babies in leopard print string bikinis. Being paraded around out in the public eye, for all the pedophiles to gawk at. SERIOUSLY! This clothing line specializes in string bikinis in an assortment of sexy bold fabrics for the tiniest female; you know birth through age 7!

Why in the hell would you want your infant/toddler/kindergarten child to be sexy? To be strolling around the tot spot at the local pool promoting them as sex appeal. Are you freaking kidding me? It’s not cute. It’s plain out trashy and distasteful! It infuriates me that there are ONE), clothes with these types of sexual undertones that are marketed to such a young market via their parents , and TWO) that there are parents out there who see nothing wrong with allowing their toddlers to stroll around in clothing whose main goal is aimed at sex appeal to men. Grown men!

As parents we strive to keep our children safe, to protect them as best we can from the malicious adversities found out in the world. We work for years to teach our children right from wrong and how to lead a balanced socially and emotionally successful life. When I come across things like this, a clothing line that is aimed at little girls as young as birth, which aims to teach them to be sex kittens from way too early on, I get enraged. We wonder why more and more of our children are becoming promiscuous at such an early age. We wonder why our young woman are losing respect for themselves and acting out in wild and destructive behaviors stemming from sex beginning in the tween age. We ponder the possibilities that it is just kids being kids. In reality we as society are allowing this to happen to our children.

We are stripping our children of their childhood. Allowing them to grow up way to fast. Allowing them to embrace a sexual side of humanity that is just not appropriate for their age. They are infants. They are children. They should be concerned with Marco Polo and how to float on their back, not if their string bikini is tied correctly and showing enough skin.

I have Hot Pink Hair in my 30’s and I find it okay to spank my child when needed. Some may say I am not the “norm” as societal mothers go today. But I have found that I am have become more and more strict as a parent. I may have some non conventionalness about me but I am an old prudie when it comes to my child. I don’t find string bikinis “Cute” on my daughter. Not because the bikini isn’t cute, Hell when I was 20 and perky I would have worn it, but that is just it. When I was 20 years old; Not 20 months old. I don’t doubt Baby DIVA would be adorable in her little bikini, but I don’t want her projecting “sex” to everyone she encounters while in it. Sure you may not think she is projecting sex by simply wearing tiny piece of fabric, but the hairy dude in the corner might not. It’s just inappropriate. Plain ridiculous and appalling. We don’t need to see sexy toddlers. Let them be kids!

Thoughts?

Wagon Wheel Thief

I do not get overly angry or mad too often. I rarely complain or make a negative remark of any sort, and I especially do not do so here on my blog aka my happy place. However, I encountered something this week that just CHAPS MY HIDE! I was so mad at this that I want to share it with you. If you are one of the guilty to this type of behavior we are no longer friends!!!

I totally understand that the economy is sour and the whole country is a struggling. Hubbs-to-be and I are right there with the next person. You do what you can and you make the best of it. Right? Well! It appears there are some folks out there who just have no shame what so ever!

Lovetoshopmom directed me to some new yummies for Baby DIVA to try. She is now feeding herself and has 2 1/3 teeth so I wanted her to have some crunchies. Lovetoshopmom advised that Gerber has some fabulous Wagon Wheels and puffs for first time eaters. So off I went to the store to purchase these yummies. And yes I know WHOA Pink Haired Momma is buying pre made food for Baby DIVA! Yeppers! I can puree like a master but baking of mouth dissolving puffs, I just don't got that skill my friends.

So anyway there I am in the Gerber ails and I locate the puffs and throw a few different flavors in the buggy. Found the Wagon Wheels on the top shelf and chose the carrot variety and off it went into the buggy. Swung by the snickers aisle...oh wait just kidding No I didn't. Hahaha! checked out with my yummies and headed home.

Around dinner time I busted out the Wagon Wheels in hopes of Baby DIVA giving them a try. I was utterly and completely speechless and angered. After I removed the plastic top I discovered that someone had not only opened my box of Wagon Wheels but ate some and left A HALF EATEN ONE IN THE PACKAGE!!! Hello GROSS!!!

Pissed off not only at this disgusting behavior but at the fact that Baby DIVA would not be trying Wagon Wheels , Hubbs-to-be told me to take them back to the store. So I did. And this is where it gets worse. Upon returning them (and let me remind you this specific item was found on the top shelf where only parents can reach)the sales lady told me it happens all the time. Parents bring there kids into the store. They are broke so they go and get cans of food like Wagon wheels, allow their kids to eat on it, then return it to the shelf before leaving. The store is aware of the problem and is doing everything they can to eliminate this atrocity. Then she gave me a new can (sealed and not munched on of course, I checked) of Wagon Wheels and sent me on my way.

I am completely appalled at this behavior! Again I understand we are all struggling financially right now. But come on. That is a crime people. You are teaching your youth, your offspring to steal and to cover up a bad type of behavior. Oh my goodness I am just flabbergasted at this behavior. I know it occurs, but it just really got under my skin this time.

I guess the only thing I can do is check my cans of Wagon Wheels and puffs before checking out in the future. Make sure you check your too because of those thieving mommies out there. GROSS!

My personal thoughts on Pull Over DIVA response

Although the response is welcomed and I am happy that my voice was in fact heard, I feel it does not get me any further to an answer to my concerns. The problem is still apparent. I do not want to purposely anger the police officer if I take my time in exiting the freeway to protect my child which can result in the officers discretion as to how to handle me. I have seen far to many incidences where an officers "discretion" was used and such discretion was used to taser a traffic stop citizen or arrest them for an unjust reason (usually later deemed unjust by the court system). I also have taken a slight defense to the "follow all the traffic laws" statement in this email. I find that this is implying that I the Pink Haired Momma would be "guilty" of the offense if a police officer has pulled me over. However it is my understanding that I have the right as a citizen to go through the legal system and appear before a judge and my peers before the guilt is associated with me, if in fact I am truly guilty of said citation. I also would like to note that an officer is human and can make issue citations when no citations would be necessary, again to be decided in a court of law. Just my thoughts in response to this email.

Response to Pull Over Baby DIVA

A few days ago I posted a concerning question that I posed to various transportation agencies around Texas regarding the safety of my child during a traffic stop by police. I promised you, the reader, I would update you as responses were received and given to me the Pink Haired Momma. I received the first response yesterday from the Texas Department of Transportation. Although the response is welcomed and I am happy that my voice was in fact heard, I feel it does not get me any further to an answer to my concerns. I would like to hear what your thoughts are on this concern as well as the response I received from the Texas Department of Transportation. As to not taint your own individual thoughts I will wait and post my personal response at a later time.



Here is a copy of email received:



Ms. (Pink Haired Momma),
There are no state statutes that cover the scenario you provided. When stopped by an emergency vehicle, drivers are required to pull to the right and stop. Common sense yields that the location of the stop should be in a safe area. Many agencies conduct traffic stops on freeways on the shoulder. However, I’m sure those officers would prefer to be in a safer location during the stop. As long as the nearest exit is used and you make your intentions to the officer as clear as possible as you’ve suggested, I believe you will be ok. It is up to the discretion of each officer to decide if the driver is attempting to evade arrest or attempting to find a safe place to stop.

Another suggestion would be to obey all of the traffic laws and, therefore, never provide an opportunity to placed in this situation.

I wish you safe travels for you and your child.

Texas Highway Patrol
Austin

Pull Over Baby DIVA?

Recently I was driving along the freeway when My Pink Haired brain poofed an incredible thought. “What if I get pulled over by a cop while Baby DIVA is in the car?” I do not feel comfortable pulling off to the side of the freeway and parking. There are too many crazy not attention paying freaks who won’t put down their blackberry and are trying to twitter about the traffic that they just might slam in to my car and injure my child.

NO THANK YOU!!!

Recently here In Houston we have experienced a horrible accident on the freeway system that not only took the life of 2 individuals it also injured a police officer. What you ask happened? Well the deceased individuals had their cars parked on the shoulder as well as the officer who was injured. Another car did in fact slam in to them and it resulted in a catastrophic nightmare. These kinds of accidents, although they seem rare, do happen. I am not willing to take any chance with my daughter’s life. Shouldn't’t a citizen be able to take a few extra moments to remove themselves from harm’s way?

I went to my parents, who lucky for me, just happen to be traffic attorney's, and asked them about this situation. I questioned them with the following: I am concerned that if I am being pulled over by a police officer on the freeway and I turn on my flashers and carefully and safely try and exit the freeway and proceed to a safe out of danger place to pull my car over, that I am in turn just going to anger the police officer to the point where he gives further citations. Is there a proper protocol for this matter and if so how do I handle this scenario? How do I properly alert the officer that I am going to comply with his request to pull over, however I am choosing to do so in a safe manner to protect the safety of my child who is in the car?

You may think that a police officer would not be angered by such scenario; I assure you that you are wrong. If a police officer has to follow you for unknown reasons he or she is most likely not going to be happy. And who could blame him? If the officer has no idea what is going on in your vehicle, he has only been trained to expect the worst.

Mom and Pop alerted me to that fact that we do not have a protocol for such scenario. In fact there are not any laws or legislation in regards to the safety of the passengers in the car or how to exit properly if you have an infant or children in the car. There is just a law or understanding that you pull over to the right side as quickly and safely as possible.

HMMMM! Interesting! I pondered this for a moment.

Then I decided to take it upon myself to contact my state representatives, John Coryn and Kay Bailey Hutchison, the Houston Police Chief, and the Texas Department of Public Safety in regards to this matter. I am curious if this has ever been addressed. I am also hoping that by raising and proposing this question officers can be alerted to this concern parents may have about being pulled over for citations while driving on the freeway system.

I propose that officers be aware that cars that carry a “Baby on Board” sticker may need to take a few extra moments in getting off the freeway before the citation process begins. By simply switching the flasher lights on coupled with the “Baby on Board” sign should generate enough warning to the officer that a citizen is in fact following the requested act that the area of concern should be diminished. I hope that open communication on this matter between the local police and the citizens can draw a conclusion that the child’s safety is of concern and we can work together to try and do what we can to prevent as many tragedies as possible.

I am currently waiting on response from the State Representatives, Houston Police Chief and the Texas Department of Public Safety. I will update you to their responses upon receipt.

What are you thoughts on this matter?

Not Your Ordinary Baby Shower

Yesterday, this Pink Haired Momma attended a baby shower of a wonderful family friend. This shower however was not your ordinary baby shower. For example this is a snapshot of the front cover of the Thank You Card from the Mom-to-be...

And this is a the area where the guests and Mom-to-be spent all their time

Why do you ask were all the guests and Mom-to-be getting hammered at a BABY SHOWER?

Well again this was not your ordinary shower. The mom-to-be is not in fact pregnant. Her bouncy baby boy is resting and growing comfortably inside his rent a womb surrogate mom. So now you see why all the guests had to be hammered! Rent a womb momma was at the shower too with her mother. Talk about some weirdness is this party room!!!

It is so awesome that our family friend is receiving this gift of life from her chosen rent a womb. However it was very bizarre and strange to bear witness to. The rent a womb momma was there at the shower with the babe in womb of course. She was quite nice but this addition to the shower had many many strange emotions bouncing about in all those who surrounded her. For instance, I really wanted to congratulate our family friend, but do I also congratulate this rent a womb momma as well? I mean she is a swollen and miserable; we all know what we it feels like to be 35 weeks pregnant and it ain't fun. But truly she really is just the rent a womb. She was no genetic contribution to this baby at all. She has no emotional connection to anyone other than the new parents to be either. This really was just baffling to me and confusing and made me somewhat uncomfortable. Again I express I am so grateful and excited that my family friend is able to have a child, however I still am unsure on my thoughts and emotions of this possibility.

Surrogacy is an awesome medical technique that we have in this world that can provide a reproductively challenged pair of parents with the ability to pass on their unique genetic make-up to a new life and raise a baby that is in fact "their" own genetic make-up. This is wonderful in some respects and just plain weird in others.

For instance, the emotional side renders weirdness. As a recent momma I do not understand how a woman can carry a baby for 9 months and feel it grow and develop inside her only to let it go as soon as it takes it first breath of life. Now I understand adoptions and choosing to give a baby to a family that can raise it properly when a mom may not be in a place to do so herself. As hard as that is, I can understand this decision. I can not seem to grasp though an understanding on why a woman would be willing get pregnant for a STRANGER for money and go through pregnancy by choice knowing she will have no relation to this baby later in life, genetically or emotionally. BIZARRE!!! However I can somewhat understand to do this for a family member or very close friend but a stranger blows me away. But honestly I still am trying to process this whole concept.

Then there is the other emotional weirdness that we experienced yesterday at the shower. I mean even down to the opening of gifts. The genetic mom-to-be and the rent a womb opened gifts together. Should they? They also reported to the group od shower attendees that they shopped for and decorated the nursery together. Again, Should they? I mean rent a womb will not be a part of this baby's life at all so...well it is just weird.

Then I started thinking about some other emotional issues. While I was pregnant we began a slow transition into parenthood well before Baby DIVA arrived. How? Well towards the end we had already begun the no sleepy dance. I was so uncomfortable and in turn I purposely made hubbs-to-be uncomfortable so he could "share" in my experience of being 60 pounds heavier, unable to lay comfortably, having of constant heartburn and peeing myself regularly because the babe squashed the bladder ALL the time. In a surrogacy the new mom and dad do not experience this at all. They see the rent a womb belly growing to full gigantic proportion but they do not interact with it daily. So as of now they are enjoying perfectly normal resting patterns and once the babe comes they will be jolted into reality. This emotional issue is relevant to many different aspects of the transition from pregnancy to parenthood.

While I am incredibly excited for the birth of this baby as well as grateful that my friend was able to find a willing rent a womb, the whole scenario has brought of lots of questions and deep thoughts for me. I am still pondering this miraculous medical marvel as I type this post. I wanted to just voice my crazy Pink Haired thoughts (even thought I have yet to decide my personal opinion or stand on this technique) on this interesting way of bringing life into this world.

Amelia is 3 weeks old today

Amelia is 3 weeks old today. I can hardly believe it!! 3 short weeks ago she came into this world. And i can not even begin to imagine life without her!!

I received my first possible project assignment today from the at home job company i have teamed up with. I have my project specific interview scheduled for 4am. The pay is decent and the hours will work with my fiance's schedule and my staying home all day with the baby schedule. hopefully this goes smoothly. Looking foward to being a stay at home mommie!!!

Also today is the first day that daddy has gone back to work. Amelia and I are enjoying our first day home alone together. She seemed to sense the change in the atmosphere as she was somewha tfuss this morning. She now is resting and evne gave me some smiles (gas I know) earlier!!!

I was thinking earlier and talkng some with my mom. The uneasiness i feel sometimes about this transition from working to staying home is a false sense of unease brought upon by the legalities in society. Why is it that we must strive to reach the highest regards in business and finances to be considerred successful? Why is it that we look down upon mothers and fathers who choose to be successful at raising their children on budgets so that quality time takes precedence? I dont get it. I have been beating myself up about coming home full time because of the finances. How stupid is that. The time and moments I will spend with my daughter will so reside more in my heart and soul as success far longer than the purchase of a new outfit or top of the line coffee pot. Dont you think?