hello.

im now risking my life to use my lappy now.
although its mine.
cos it is supposed to be confiscated by my dad.
but i secretly took it out to use.
cos i cant use the com at home.
my dad just smashed the keyboard the other day.
AWWWW! ):

i need to use the com to do my work.
but he confiscated my lappy and spoil the keyboard.
like please la.
he scolded me like shit the other day.
and my mum was there adding oil to the fire.
OMGOMG!
at first, he scolded me for using the lappy until late.
den he cont on scolding me, cos i was crying like shit.
but i was in such a bad mood that day (last saturday) la.
anw, if he dint start shouting at me, i wont even cry.
ARGH!
life just sux man.
how i wish i can manage to get my lappy back.
i just got it for 2 days and it is confiscated.
like oh man!
sometimes, i really hate my parents.
cos they would always act as if they really know me very well.
but maybe they do.
and they would always like to assume that i would be the BAD way they think im.
or even teenagers are.
but please la.
cant you two just have some faith in your own daughter?
also, my dad now dun let me go out with my friends and wants to reduce my allowance.
his reasons being, if i go out i will get upset, and when i bring my sadness home, he will be unhappy too.
so to prevent all this from happening.
he dun let me go out.
like please la.
im not a ten year kid anymore.
i mean even ten years old are going out with friends now.
like NOW!
but he's restricting a soon-to-be 18 girl. ):

and i seriously need my lappy back to go online to do school stuff.
SCHOOL STUFF to be exact.
omg.

actually, i was quite suicidal last saturday after everything finally ended.
like my mum keep saying that its me whose always reponsible for making my dad real angry.
but do you think i really wanna get everyone into trouble?
absolutely not!
but she just keep blaming me.
she even slap me la.
ARGH!
but i find myself quite cowardy though.
i dun even dare to kill myself la.
im so scared of pain.
OUCH!
and i cried myself to sleep.
my eyes was so swollen when i woke up on sunday.
AWWWW! ):

sigh.
i simply hate my life now.
why cant they just put themself im my shoes for just one moment and think for me?
rather than think for me in their own shoes.
but not literally eh.
cos thinking for me in their own shoes is equals to not thinking for me actually, i think.
sigh.

anw, today was school agn as usual.
there's only lectures today.
i almost slept my way through both the lectures.
the first was CSA.
the lecturer's english simply sux man.
his pronounciation is like OMG la.
den was macroeconomics.
the lecturer was good.
but i just dint have the energy to keep myself awake.
i ended up depending on marcus's prunes to keep myself awake.
i was eating non-stop la.
cos he dint want it anymore.
so i took the whole packet and started eating.
its so nice la.
and i spend part of the lecture munching away.
haha.

oh ya!
i went jogging yesterday.
ran 10 times around the stadium.
having this great sense of achievement now.
haha.
like i usually die at my 4th or 5th round.
but i manage to run 10 yesterday.
HAHA!
and i seriously think that running at night is better.
at least, the sun isnt there anymore.
haha.
alright.

that's all den.