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Lillian- hahaha!! Did I ever "backstab" you before? I don't remember backstabbing anyone recently. Lol!!
9:59 PM
Monday, August 02, 2010
a waste of time I can't believe that some people are trying to make me real sad by saying I am fat and fat and fat.
Jeremy has been saying that to me all the time. My collegues as well. So what makes you think your words would affect me? -.-
Frankly speaking, I'm not really bothered by it very much. So what if I'm fat? At least I'm not wasting my time away trying to make others feel inferior.
You all can try to put me down as much as you want. But let me give you a headstart, calling me fat and insulting my physical appearance would not work on me. COS I'VE ALREADY REN MING (resort to fate). I don't care how others see me so long as I'm happy with the way my life is.
All the best.
I'll be starting school in three week's time. So excited!! I've browsed through the modules. ALL THE ANG MOH-ISH!! I wonder if I can cope with this. :/
The worse thing is
I think the worse feeling going through my body is, knowing that he's home but he didn't give me a call. I don't think I'm being possessive.
I believe that no matter how tired you are, you can give your loved ones a call. To say a word of goodnight or whatever sweetnothings you want to say before heading off to bed.
Why can't he do that?
Ok call me crazy. I just miss him a lot that's all.
12:52 AM
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
these few days Decided to give a short update since I'm having like 5days MC.
Did an extraction yesterday. I FINALLY KNOW HOW PATIENTS FELT WHEN THEY WERE PROPPING FOR SURGERY!! It was bloody scary!!!! I totally knew when the scaple was slicing my gums and could hear my wisdom tooth coming out when Dr Intek was using the forceps. The worse part was the injection and the pushing and pulling. My tears almost flowed when I was given the injection. However throughout the surgery, I couldn't feel any pain. IT WAS DONE SO FAST!! And I heard Dr Intek and Sharon saying that they could see my nerve and bone when they extracted the lower right tooth. WHAT THE HELL!!!
After that on the way home, the anesthesia began to wore off. That was when I started feeling real hell. It was aching so bad! I was starting to whine already. And the pain made it hard to sleep as well. Plus the swelling. Sheesh.
Today, I feel so much better!! The swelling lessen and the bleeding stopped. I could talk normally again. But eating is still a problem. I couldn't open my mouth wide and had to SLIDE my spoon into my mouth and swallow.
All in all, THIS IS A GREAT EXPERIENCE!!! Call me mad but it really is! How many people can really get to sit on the chair and brave through four LA OP done all at once? It's amazing I done it. *pats on my shoulder*
I had to thank Dr Intek, Sharon and Nina for being there.
Attended Jeremy's cousin's (Patrick) wedding dinner on Saturday. Totally freaked out because I'd be meeting all his relatives. Things didn't turn out well for me for the first half. I was totally humiliated in front of everyone in the room. I felt so angry and hurt! Wanted to cry out so badly. Wanted to run away so badly. But I promised Jeremy I had to put on a smile. It was really very hard. To not show my true emotions was the hardest part ever. Sigh... I hope this would not happen again. It was the second time this humiliation has happened. I don't think I would want to see her for the time being. Sigh... Super hurt.
Stopping here now. Can't think of anything else. Hate it when I have this mind block whenever I'm thinking about something.
It's another Sunday
Totally overslept this morning. Was supposed to wake up at 7:30am but I guess someone deactivated my alarm. Woke up at 9:40 instead. How nice.
Rushed over to Jeremy's house by car. And he was really nice to me the whole day. Full of patience and gentleness. I think my crying yesterday kindda scared him. LOL!!
I just love spending days with him. No stress and whatever it is, he would always support me.
I'm going to be a student again starting on the 24th. NUH is sponsoring me to a Dental Surgery Assistant course. I'm kindda afraid that I would not be able to cope with the part-time studying lifestyle.
Gotta head to bed now. Work tomorrow. Hope tomorrow is a better day.
I miss him...
10:56 PM
Speechless
I dread going home now. Being labelled as a loose woman was the last thing on my mind. I can't believe you would say that to me. I am your daughter. Anyone else can insult me any shit-ass word they want. They can call me a slut, for all I care. But you. One of the person I cared for the most. My closest family member, my closest friend. I understand if you are angry. But the way you said it felt like you've been having that impression of me for the longest time.
You are the one who asked me not to stick to one guy as I am still young. So I am a loose woman just because I go out with guys? I don't sleep around. I don't go leaning onto them. I don't say sweet little things to them. They are just friends!! And I always make it a point to let Jeremy know who I'm going out with.
I went out of the house immediately is because I didn't know how to face you anymore. That comment you made about me really hurts. In case you didn't know, I've always minded the little things you say about me. No matter what I do, you will never be satisfied. I will never ever be the perfect daughter (clever, dependable, stay-at-home girl) you've always wanted. I am none of those. I am not your eldest daughter. I'm sorry I'm such a loser and useless.
But one thing I am not. I am definitely not a loose woman. I never was and never will be.
I hate the place called "home".
12:02 AM
Sunday, January 03, 2010
The internet speed is really killing me. The constant lagginess is driving me crazy.
Fuck I hate this.
7:46 PM
Saturday, December 19, 2009
just the little things Life in the clinic is rather boring nowadays. All the packing and shifting really puts the mood off. Yes we can use the computer, surf the net and stuff. But after long hours, it can be really draining.
Luckily I brought my camera along and got everyone's mood to pump up for a while. Photos would be posted in the next post as I would be uploading a whole bunch. Just waiting for the rest of the photos to fall into my hands. Haha!
Sooo.... I GOT MY VERY OWN GUCCI BAG!!!!
Jeremy bought it for me as a christmas present. The intention was actually to get me my dream phone, HTC Touch Pro 2. It was out of stock in all outlets and I have to order. The waiting time would be a month!!
Of course, the foul-tempered me gave the salesgirl my black face and walked off thanking her with a no-thank you tone. I was feeling darn disappointed ok!! I had been wanting that phone for so long!!
Jeremy then took me to Sushi Tei. Ok then my mood was a bit lifted up. I still looked like I am simply diao-ing people la wtf.
Then Jeremy asked me if I wanted to get a bag instead. Bag or phone. We were at Paragon at that time and DUH! bbbbaaaaaaggggg!! Went into Prada and it was way out of his budget. Then went into Coach and I almost puked at their collection. Finally went into Gucci and a nice lady helped me picked my bag!! She was very very polite and sweet!!
I couldn't contain my happiness!! I smiled the whole day after that.
Heeellloooo!! I'm not the materialistic kind of girl. Even if he doesn't get me the bag, I will still cheer up in the end. I won't be frowning the whole day.
I'm watching a performance tomorrow!!! Reverie On Ice!!! Watching it with Sylvia, Ketricia and Phyu San. can't wait!!!
Last but not the least,
HAPPY 4 YEARS ANNIVERSARY, DEAR!!!! it sux not being able to celebrate our 4th year together but hey! i'll be fetching you when you book out tomorrow. you've been supporting me since 4yrs ago. giving me all your love. although the first few years were SWEETER. *grumble grumble* hearing your voice would make me jump into a happy mood. but i still hate it when you try to irritate me to the max. cos you succeed all the time no matter how much i persevere.
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hanling_3@hotmail.com
