The big question everyone is asking lately is, "Are you nervous?"
My answer: "Uhhh....YEAH!" (If you can imagine that said with a lot of added sarcasm you can catch the true flavor.)
Truth is, I think about it all the time. Delivery: Labor. Pushing. Epidural. Episiotomy. Pain. It's sort of on a loop in my brain. The problem, though, is that I don't really know what to expect. I mean, sure. I've heard the stories. I've watched the Discovery Channel and TLC. I've seen movie deliveries. I even witnessed a live birth. But...I don't know what to expect of ME. I'm the unknown integer in this little formula.
Will I be brave? Will I keep at least a tiny sense of humor? Will I manage to maintain a little dignity?
My friends are wondering the same thing. Kimball said, "I want to be there. Not in the room," he quickly clarified. "Just outside the door, listening." And then everyone laughed. Apparently the prevailing attitude is that it might make for a good show. Bets are being placed on how many swear words may be used. Or how long it will take before I lose my temper. Sympathy is already flowing in Mr. Wicke's direction.
I do not like the unexpected. The not knowing always makes me nervous. And I do not like losing control, which is bound to happen. So, yeah. 16 days to go, and I'm feeling a little anxious. But, then again, I guess that's to be expected. At least that's what everyone says. And then they laugh. Again.
Monday, February 16, 2009
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16 comments:
I'm nervous and it is our third time. And I just get to walk in and get prepped for a C-section, I don't even have to figure out if I am in labor and go through all that. It is just the total culmination of the last nine months! You will do great. And I can't wait to hear the story;)
Hey Laurel! Great to be in touch on FB and now here, too! I have a blog as well...staceymullins.blogspot.com
I was always nervous...you will do great! What a beautiful family you have and how blessed to be adding another boy! Congrats!
I so get that. Even though I birthed three children, I did all c-sections and never felt a labor pain in my life, so I can't really say how it would be and that would TOTALLY freak me out. You have my sympathy, but also my congrats! I can't believe it's so close. I'm so happy for you!!
Get an epidural. I've delivered with and without and let me tell you, I prefer to be myself and not swear (as much) or be mean to the husband who of course is a huge insensitive idiot while I'm sitting their laboring. It's just...nicer. And I say you write out a birth plan and tell your doctor NO episiotomies unless a little tiny one is absolutely necessary after you've already tried pushing for awhile--if that should be the case.
I was lucky and my midwife did things that way but she told we that there was a man doctor (of COURSE) who cut his patients down to there anus every time, no matter what. Insensitive idiot. How do you he'd like his butt crack lengthened and then have to sit on it for six weeks trying to care for an infant? And why I go to a woman doctor that's birthed her own babies.
Anyway, more than you wanted to know but I think episiotomy-givers are jerks and epidurals are worth it. And you'll probably still be witty--even without drugs. Of course those narcotics they can give you (if you ask and skipped the epidural) make everything fun.
I am so excited for you! I love, love child birth!! It is the most amazing experience! Good luck and you will do great!
Oh sweetheart you'll be fine. Have a blessing for sure before. You will be terrific. I hopefully can come visit you when this cute Lincoln arrives! :) Let me know if I can help in any way. You rock, Laurel.
I'm nervous too and this is my 4th baby!!
The best "advice" I got when I was pregnant with Samantha (and getting ready to deliver) is I told my doctor I was SCARED (not a little nervous but SCARED) and he looked at me and said "why are you scared? Bigger whimps than you have had babies before" and I felt like it was the perfect thing to say...I'm strong, I've done hard things before...I can totally do this! So, I tell myself that everytime...bigger whimps than me have done this before...I can do this!
All will go well, and you will be so brave. I'm so excited for you. I can't believe 16 days is all, wow!! Does your mom get to come? Good Luck, and let us know all everything goes.
Don't forget that a beautiful new baby is also expected--so who cares how ugly it gets right before his arrival!
Good luck, Laurel! So excited for you. It is always scary right before. But, you will get yourself through it...you will be great! And your husband will be there for you. And, if you use a few cuss words...well, that happens. ;)
Nora told me you were nervous, and I may alone in this but labor and delivery are my very favorite part of pregnancy and childbirthing. I love it, the anticipation, the beginning of pain and then the release of it as your epidural kicks in and you only know your having a contraction because the screen tells you its there, the first sign your baby is coming, seeing him, holding him, ALL of it. Then the hospital, I LOVE it, I love to have the baby brought to me when I want, to sleep when I want, to be fed by great family and friends and visit looking giddily at this new life you helped create. Its miraculous, and heavenly. As long as you get the right amount of epidural its rather pain free and make sure you take the pain meds after because you do have after birth pains which kill but all can be remedied if you ask. Your body will heal and you will get back in shape. Seriously though, its a mind set, you will be nervous but it is such an experience! Oh and all that was sacred and secret under your clothes is thrown out the window just be ok with that. Again, if I am the sole being who feels this way, I accept that. GOOD LUCK!
Dear Laurel,
The blessing and the prize is that sweet little boy that is your's, your husband's and God's. I think every woman is nervous and scared (the first time and every time) but we have the promise that we'll endure. When I had Carolee I really didn't know what to expect or what was going on with my body. I was really uninformed and very ignorant about birth.
I was scheduled to take the Lamaze classes beginning the day after she arrived. She came 10 days early. Yes, it hurt like bad cramps, but I made it through and what a great and wonderful feeling and blessing when the baby finally came and I held her on my chest. I took the Lamaze classes before Thomas came and knew exactly what was happening with my body and why the pain. It really made labor and delivery bareable. I chose to have natural child birth but having an epidural is really OK. You'll do just fine with Thomas at your side and knowing what a precious gift you will have. You have waited a very long time for this.
I did not have the after birth pains until the second baby came. That was with Thomas, and I have to agree that those pains are the worst. I instructed the doctors to give me something just as soon as they could so that I could get through those times. Again there is a reason for the after birth pains, it's to shrink the uterus. Knowing why and with the drug the doctor gave me I endured the after birth pains too.
Christ suffered for us all, Laurel you can do this for Lincoln. You'll do just fine and who cares if you cry out or say a few colorful words, it helps sometimes. All athletes yell at times.
Yes, the blessing will be the most important thing you can get.
Let me know what I can do for you. You are in our prayers every day.
Much Love
I remeber thinking that things were going to go easy with angels singing in the background. I got over that hallusination fast. 17 hours of labor on pitocin and then a c-section to boot. It was like pushing the bus and then getting thrown under it, really hard experience, but worth it for my daughter.
I think prepare for the worst (c-section) and when it does not happen you can be happy. All I can tell you is that anyway that it happens you will be SO happy when that baby is finally a person and not part of you. And the trick is to be demanding, if you are all, Im's okay, I don't need anything, they will leave you alone. Ask for things up front, if you want an epidural, let them know first thing cause you might wait too long and then you miss that window of opportunity. Ask questions, why are you doing that, what is that for, be active in your care and they will take better care of you, if you have a birthing plan let them know or they will stick a binky in that kids mouth and then nursing is a nightmare, tell them what you want and not the other way around. Squeeky wheel.
You know, my plan was to have no plan. I was just going to go with the flow. I was going to try natural birth, but if it was too painful I wasn't going to beat myself up about getting an epidural. And that's pretty much what happened. I did the contractions until they got so painful I couldn't stand it anymore (but I was on pitocin which makes contractions worse) and then asked for an epidural which was the BEST decision of my life. It's like my OB told me -- you could have knee surgery without anesthesia, but WHY WOULD YOU?
Also, I don't know what it says about me that all I could think about during my contractions was poor Melanie Wilkes from Gone With the Wind -- having her baby in that hot summer with no air conditioning and Yankees on the way and only a knife under the bed to "cut the pain." Yes, I am weird.
ok.... Laurel, just take a deep breath and ENJOY every minute of it...After throwing up and having IVs for the full 9 months having Jacoby come into this world was the most rewarding experience ever... I walked around the mall with Mathew and ate french fries to get my contractions going because I knew MY Dr was working Friday and Saturday and HE was going to deliver my baby..
We walked in the hospital and they wanted me to sit in a wheel chair!! NOT.. I walked to labor and delivery, found out I was 4 1/2 cms dilated, broke my water (and I STILL have the CROCHET HOOK)lol
Mathew snored all night while I lay awake feeling my baby inside kicking for what would be for only a few hours.. Had an epidural and laughed with everyone, told jokes.. Mathew found it completely fun to let go of my numb legs, sticking his head in where it shouldn't be to see if Jacoby was coming yet... Crying when the Nurse said.. "It's time to push"
Trying to push and hold in poop is rather difficult and I was more worried about doing that than any pain.. I had NO pain and chatted on the phone to a friend until I felt I really did need to push.. Episiotomy done and suction that made Jacobys head look like it was 12 inches long! and hey presto the best gift I could ever have was plopped onto my chest and as I gazed down at my little Angel the 9 months of throw up was all worth it.. A fantastic labor and delivery
GREAT.. then a double dose of Staydol(allergic reaction) sent me into a frenzy and throwing up and lo and behold it was 24 hrs later that I got to really look at my baby and was alert enough to hold him...
That's nothing.. wait until your milk comes in and you get engorged.. tee hee hee.. and the stitches prod and poke and itch..
OH.... Life is wonderful..
By the way GOOD LUCK !!!!!! lol
Maybe they could sell tickets to your labor experience. I bet people would pay big bucks (and you could use carefully placed sheets to ensure a PG-13 rating, well except the language might make change the rating depending on your level of pain...) JK
All 3 of my labors and deliveries were unique. But the things they had in common were they were all wonderful, but all painful!
My only advice is if you plan to get an epidural don't wait too long. You many need to even fake that the pain is worse than it is in order to get higher on the list of the anesthesiologist. Jonah was 10.5 lbs. and I waited too long to tell someone I needed the epidural and let's just say I was sure I was on death's door without that epidural. But alas, I survived. And when I held him for the first time it felt like I was holding a 3 month old he was so big.
Despite the pain of labor and delivery, the recovery, the stitches, the engorged b**bs, etc. it is a wonderful experience and I am so glad you get to have it (seriously!). All those things pale in comparison to the wonder and joy of holding that baby in your arms and knowing how much you sacrificed to give him life and love. I am SO excited for you.
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