PARTYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY YAO ! (: GOOD THAT YOU ENJOYED YOURSELF AND I THINK IT WAS A GREAT PARTY ! :D WISHING YOU ALL THE BEST IN YOUR LIFE AHEAD. SMILE ! <3

it was fun all the way from the beginning. from the decorating the surprise the food the dunking the basketball and everythinggg. yups. :)

a big thank you to everyone who has contributed to the success of the party !
NAOMI who came up with the idea buying the cake talking to yao's mum and all the stuff we did haha !
yang who helped out by .. helping out. :) yup he helped to convey stuff to his mum ! lol and contribute his ideas HAHHA
yao's mum for being so nice and kind and helping us book and everythg!
everyone who came and brought yummy food and just being there ((:

ms tan's party was also very nice ! haha. it was very different from yao's one. but anyway it was great too! but there wasnt a lot of people. :) yup so really tired and exhausted now.

tata~

i picked myself up at 6:49 AM
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ohhh.. hinthint for future presents. haha MYUK wallet bag pencil case ; shades. hehe :)

anyway open champs is over! AND VP WON! whooooo~ haha although there wasnt much excitement. they just took away all the fun.. all the messy organization. all the traditions are being lost, ahwell, im just glad i was once part of the tradition. :D its just sad tht when its finally our time, our time to know whats going on and have all the fun, everything's just falling apart one by one. and did u realise something else missing: the parents VS coaches race !! apart from the best performer, challenge trophies, the excitement between V and VP all the competition, fun with the relays, the neo chee cup thingy, the captains and banners and cheers and pompoms. wonder where those went.

although my swims were awful, just glad tht we got to spend time as a team again! haha. should really treasure these times since i really dont know how many more of these i have left. well at least this year we had fun smearing people's faces with cake !! haha. i tried to smear some on peck and obviously missed so i went around trying to get people and everyone then started smearing everyone and everything was a huge mess. but it was fun :) no dunking though! ): you just wait. haha

please go look again.

i guess many things just didnt go right today. im sorry and its over and ill start anew today. i promise! :) i will never lose it ever again.even if i have to force a smile on my face. :D

/edit
i swam 10 events today. so i have the most right to complain that i was really tired and exhausted rite ! :) haha oh and for this meet, i have 0 pbs. okay i should get used to tht fact.. since im officially becoming an oldie real soon. and when ure and oldie. u can only hope tht u swim near ur pb. haha !

i picked myself up at 12:03 AM
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currently, it seems like everything's in a mess. why? i dont know. the feeling of desertion is awful. perhaps you dont realise it, perhaps its just too much to bear. its horrible when you feel you dont know anything. its terrible when you feel everyone's there except you. i really feel like telling you this, but i just dont know how to. i guess ill just have to leave with it, letting each time pierce through me time and again. thanks for everything anyway.

and..
IM SO SORRY I CANT GO, I HOPE YOU HAVE A FUN TIME ANYWAY AND I PROMISE I WILL MAKE IT UP TO YOU IF I COULD!

i picked myself up at 6:09 AM
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PLANETSHAKERSCONCERT. 11 aug. 7.30pm. pls confirm ASAP.
people going:
me
my bro
yan
terrence
addy
ems
(rachgoh gng with her frens)
anymore interested ? :)

okay sabbats wasnt tht bad becos its an area im interested in, but then again, just cant help with the closing of my eyes... hahaha

TECH WEEK'S FINALLY HERE ! okay i know some people dont like it and everythg but owell we'll just see how it goes and try to get something good out of it yea. if u go in wanting to learn something new maybe ull find that it isnt as bad as you think and it might not be as useless as you think. this might be the only way you can make a significant improvement in your swimming without training your heart out. :)

had a dream yesterday. weird one. it was about TRACK NATIONALS. can u believe it. i cant ! its like OMG anw claire and yuechin and ms tan were in it. and it was like track and swiming nationals were on the same day but it was the same place. and it was super rush and i was super relaxed and it was like i was so prepared and everythg. it either means im already starting to miss ny track, or i really want to go for next year's nats. hmmm anyhow, this yr's post nats blues arent tt bad. wonder why. hmm i know i really want to do well for nats next year. its like j1 and highest medal change, kinda.
so right now, i just need some motivation to get me going. actually i have higher goals for track becos i know i havent exactly pushed myself yet, so i want to see how far my potential can go, but its really scary and im really afraid to take tt first step. ):

tatas~

i picked myself up at 7:35 AM
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family concert was good! i think.
yups it wasnt tht long and draggy becos it was a wide variety of performances. but some of the performances were wayyyy long.. and i dint get the theatre one as usual. ><

anyway i think the esplanade concert hall is really pretty ! its tall and grand and big and it has a nice stage and everything's cool and stuff. yups everyone was really nicely dressed up. :D

okie gotta go prep for church now. cya

i picked myself up at 7:44 PM
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i know this is a little late cos all you people must be at esplanade prac-ing or resting and stuff already. but anyway

JIAYOUU TO EVERYONE PLAYING LATER FOR FAMILY CONCERT! yups. think it'll be pretty interesting because there's a wide variety.

and i got this thingy for cheryl. lol its .... no comments. sry no flowers for anyone becos ive no money and there's like a million of you playing. so ill go broke if i bgt.

oh dear its 3. and ive to leave soon for the acjc tea party! haha and im metting hh at 6. okie. shall go change and pack. ciao.

my face is growing fatter and fatter. ergh

i picked myself up at 11:35 PM
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we got fourth!

although our cdiv lost ): but its okay. im sure the NYGH TEAM will make a comeback next year and will doing exceedingly well. and ill cheer my hearts out for you guys still. i promise ! hahah :) love you guys lots and lots and lots ! <3 <3 <3 even tough we might only have gotten a fourth for b div, but we put in our best and thts wat counts, sometimes things just dont go our way. but we know we all are still a great team !!

and a particular school really annoyed me. they should learn to accept certain things, and not try to push their way through. also, they should not be so _____________.but anw, we shall not let them spoil our mood! :)

yesterday was really fun ! cheering our hearts out for our fellow teammates. and some hwachong people we knew, it was reallyf unny cos we were standing in the hwachong space, then since they were cheering we could just cheer along if we liked. they gave us this small portion of their huge space cos we didnt have any. ): but our relays did really well we won a medal in everythg! ;) and when we were down there at the track, it was really exciting. :D it was fun holding the flag and everythg, phototaking, running about, singing school song and everythg it was just amazing. TRACK DINNER was delicious and nice and we took lots of photos !! yepps. i think it was a great fantastic day. and that, was the last of running for nygh. but thts ok they still live in my heart and we'll always be part of the same team, always. :)

i dont know why, but tht sense of finale hasnt really sank into my head/heart yet. its sad, it truly is but it has inspired me to go on further.

oh yes! acjc tea party. it sounds fun and i want to go ! but i have family concert to go. so i probably wouldnt go ? thanks for inviting though! i feel honoured :D ill see if i can work anythg out. rjc tjc hcjc acjc :) how nice.

HCI got triple champs!how cool. haha. hopefully they get quadraple champs next year. lol track is pretty cool as the trackers train together and its hardwork. its not just that all the good people happen to be in a certain school. in fact, many pro people trained onlyf rom secondary school, so its from the training of the school itself! :D

chem test physics spa srq test tmr. how nice ._. im gnna waste some time and have ta do quite a lot of stuff later. lost the cip form ): anyway, got choir prac later! ciaoz.

i picked myself up at 1:43 AM
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track finals tmr ! JIAYOUU NANYANG TRACK !!!! C DIV B DIV <3 LOTS FIGHT HARD WE CAN DO THIS. :) so exciting and track dinner !! haha really looking forward to thaaaaat. :D :D :D must not forget my camera! phew i tht i lost it luckily i didnt but ive gotta find the spare batt.

speech today! it wasnt as bad as i expected.. so.. cross my fingers and hope for the best! anyway ms ng seemed rather .. entertained? hopefully. :)!

bio spa tmr !! its included in our sia grades so its pretty important. skill 4 yes? all the best!

gotta go pack my stuff for trackkk meeet tmr and read through some bio practical stuff if possible cya !

i do hope i get back what i lost
you just dont know when to stop

i picked myself up at 7:51 AM
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hmm

met elaine today !! haha we talked for quite a bit in that little time we had.. haha did some catching up. ELAINE! haha really enjoy talking to you. everytime we see each other its like we can just talk and talk nonstop and its just so .. nice ! haha despite the fact that we hardly see each other, we're still great friends :D haha OH but she said i grew chubbbbbierrrr ohnooooo >< haha anw cya soon ! we shld go out some time the last time we went out was wat, sec one?!

got back math test, yay ! it was not too bad. thank God haha but it was just 1 mark away frm a nicer mark. ohwells. im still satisfied, well i should be and i better say i am before everyone kills me. hha ><

speech tmr ! ohdear. my speech was really really long so im like kinda rewriting it.sigh its so crappy!! i hope i can just manage a B3 or A if possible. ): i really want a good overall mark this yr! its our final yr. yikes

my determination will not waver.

i picked myself up at 3:49 AM
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cheryl says im crazy. haha. im not crazy! nehneh. :)

anyway we are in a dangerous spot now. GO NANYANG! we can do this. despite all the difficulties we have faced, we will fight till the end and we will squeeze ourselves into the top four. JIAYOUU everyone, fight for every single point. every single point is worth fighting for. :D no matter what happens we will always be a great team <3

im going to support you guys on monday JIAYOUUUUUUUUU !!!!

immaturity

i picked myself up at 6:17 AM
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yayyy! i got 8th!! okay tht might snd bad to you but hey its ONE pt and thts impt and whats more i was the last qualifier. but i really wanted to contribute and i fought hard i really ran hard and i did a pb! thts really satisfying after 3 not so good runs. i thought this nationals would just be a flop. but it ended on a good note and im quite happy i ran tht great race and made the right decisions as to when to run fast and i ran 5.31 although i would have liked to run below 5:30 but thts alrite i still have more chances. :)

it was a race i really enjoyed and even though i didnt overtake those two stnicks girls at least i didnt give up and altho my legs were aching i still sprinted and did my pb. that is what is most impt. :D the race was really interesting but im too lazy to type it all out here again. heh :)

and we got our first gold medal today. well done shanru! haha. all the wayyyy nanyang fighhhht all the way dont give up we must FIGHT!! haha :D jiayouuu people !

my ankle hurts a bit now. but it doesnt affect my walking. so thats alrite.

its back to normal life once again! actually not really. cos track finals are next week!! and im really looking forward to that. YUPS. no matter what happens we'll always be one nice big family and im very glad i joined track as my 2nd (?) kinda cca. cos all you trackers have brightened up my life so much and i wld never regret it. :D yup so nxt wednesday will be one special day !! really looking forward to the finals and the dinner. rock on people!

baaaack to school. okay. must focus. time's passing so fast u don't even realise it and its just gone. time's running out! its already term 3 week 3. it feels like ive been barely back to school. and thats becos 1st wk of sch:funfair fever. 2nd wk-3rdwk: nationals! have been missing lots of school. last week i only went for 2 days? yup and this week so far ive only been to four hrs or lessons. how cool is that! but sad proper school's starting. haha back to tests homework projects and whatnot. help !

back into school mode. >< post sch nats blues ! altho it isnt over. will probably lost super long. this is the kind of thing i really enjoy ! hmm.

tata~ nites <3

and it shall start today

i picked myself up at 5:16 AM
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today was so hectic. haha. had 1500m heats. it wasnt that bad. at least its shorter then 3000m. tmr is the day i can make up for what didnt happen yesterday. i will try harddd. ><

this morning i cldnt slp. i woke up at 4.30am 5.30am and i nv really did went back to proper sleep. was i very anxious?? not really. i dont know. haha

anyway after the race i changed and left immediately i didnt even see wenrui's race end but i missed my event still. i JUST missed it !! ): when i went i saw the last person touch. >( everyone was asking me where i was. lol even uncle ong was asking hahaha

but i swam 200im. time wasnt tht great but faster than heats wtva im happy i was just playing haha but i think my back is really slow. sigh. need to train back !!

i will train hard for next year. haha

CONGRATS TO ALL SSC SWIMMERS AND GOODLUCK FOR REMAINING EVENTS. <3

ANDDDD JIAYOUUU NANYANG TRACKERS ! ROCK ON! <3 :D

when you come to this stage, you realise its not all about fun
its not all about everything you thought it was meant to be
you just dont understand that do you
and in your mind
all you have is that

i picked myself up at 2:22 AM
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im really disappointed angry and sad.
im sorry. im so so dearly sorry.
the first thing that came to my mind was :
IM REALLY SORRY.
i failed all your expectations and i didnt even earn a single point for the school.
dont even talk about the medal. or anything near that.
all the faith you all had in me.
everything.
i just felt that i disappointed everyone.
including myself.

what went wrong?
is it the flu?
thats wat daddy&mummy keep saying.
but
no excuses.
is my best simply not enough ?
that where did the 11.56 come from last year?
what is going on???
i thought i trusted Him.
maybe i didnt.
maybe my faith isnt strong enough.

sigh, tmr's the 1.5k. what should i do ?

i dont exactly have the strongest mental strength now.
i thought i was confident enough.
i tried. tried really hard to push out all negative thoughts.
all lousy feelings about myself.
but when the question came, are you ready?
why did i say no so quickly?
am i really unready ?

maybe i didnt train hard enough. which, i didnt.
but. whatever.
im just really sorry.
its not only my race. but a race FOR nanyang it was THE race that really mattered.
im so so sry ):

its hard to push all the disappointment out of my mind and go for the 1500 tmr. but i promise ill try my best. all i hope for is that my best is enough. He will do the rest.

living for God/

i picked myself up at 4:58 AM
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sickening flu, GO AWAY PLSSS. u have 1 hr to disapper. haha

ill trust in the lord. i lift up everything into his hands. not by my might but by his strength and power.can i? do i truly believe?

wait. dinner first

kk back.
haha so anyway.

I HAVE TO BELIEVE. its such a struggle..
still a little baby. ):

3k. im letting it go. im gnna let you lead me through it and not gnna try and take control. RELAX (:

i picked myself up at 2:58 AM
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sigh i realised i havent uploaded many many photos. as such, i will work hard to upload more! and im getting lazier these days to take photos. haha. >< track last yr must take more!! odear.

its time to believe. believe. believe. i will believe. 100706. its really difficult, but ill give it my best shot. ill leave it in Your hands.

green forest, my home is really cute! have been watching tht for practically the whole day. shucks ive not been doing my work. which happens to suck cos there's a lot of it. but ahhh but ohhh tht show's really cool and cute okay !! lol

would you believe me? would you trust in me? completely.

its selfish of me to think this way, but i cant help it. its creeping onto me

i picked myself up at 7:23 AM
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hahah everyone in my family at home now is sleeping ! other than me of course.tsk. lazy bums.

by monday, i need to get a completely healed ankle (think it got ! again yest. ><) get completely healthy! and believe in myself. its i can and not i cannot. ergh i really need to get all these negativity outta my head! im really really scared for monday becos i have no idea wats gonna happen. why is this taking me on a roller coaster ride? ): i dont feel up to it but i know i have to do this and this is the only time. why ?? its not like swimming where if i dont do well now, its okay because i have many other small competitions where i can perform and if i do a pb well. its also good cos at least i hit that timing. but for track, this is like the only chance i have. well there are other chances but its rare and this is the most impt. there's also jc but tht wld be different. gahhs. i will give it my all and lean onto the Lord for strength and believe tht He would help me ! easier said than done. but i will try. :x i really wanna do a pb ! why is it just so hard.

its funny how people always think that we're so lousy and everythg and then we think we're the most negative person on earth and we are very weak when everyone is thinking the same way. then everyone thinks that they are in the worst plight when actually everyone's life is just different. ahwell. i suppose im guilty of tht as well.

i really dont understand wats going on and i really think i need some time to sort it all out.

youYOU forced me into this

lotsa homework this wkend. heheh need to get lotsa rest and completely recover from this sickening flu.

i picked myself up at 1:35 AM
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WHOOOO im soooo happy chem quiz change to chem homework !! no more studying !!!!!!! YAYYYYY hahaha and sch ends early tmr. REJOICE!!!!

i totally FORGOT that there was chinese sia due tmr. ahhhhh

anyway 200 free! pb! yayyyy. and i qualified. thankyoulord! haha. :)

3k was horrrribbble tho. ms tan says im tired. lol and mum says its cos of de flu. ahhh but its like im sinking. i dont have tht power i want to and im panting like nuts. ): monday! not looking forward to that. NO. i must not have negative thoughts. nothing is impossible with God. YES. I AM NOT TIRED. I CAN DO THIS. sub-12 !!!! blearg. got to do more psyching up from now till monday. ><

sch ends early tmr ! lol. makes me highhhhh im happy. and i passed my compre test !! whoo~ its not an A but at least its a B ! its a start.

haha JIAYOUUUU TO ALL NY TRACK PEOPLE !! im SOOO sry i didnt make those card thingies for u ppl becos i didnt have time ok ? i shall msg u instead. but id ont have the track contact list. ): haha & congrats to all who qualified for finals !! we rock!

shall go do chinese now!
highhhhhhhhhhhhhhh~
its all YOUYOUYOU dont u understand how selfish u are

i picked myself up at 5:30 AM
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whoo~ haha im sooo scared for tmr. haha not so scared la. but i really wanna qualify ! hehheh. okies its late. tata ~

i picked myself up at 7:21 AM
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haha i only have 600 words left !! for chinese portfolio. currently getting nowhere. oh i better start. ahhhh

okay i finished it.. YAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i really wonder ...........

i picked myself up at 5:27 AM
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wah im so sad la cheryl dao me okay ! haha so i have no idea wat is going on in school today. owell. hope i didnt miss much. as much as i dont want to go to school. :D

anyway 200im was okay. i actually did below 2.50. that is good! beacuse i wasnt expecting much. like how much can i expect anyway !! haha so yay. no pressure. and i qualified! thats cool huh. im not even last qualifier. im 6th !! whoo~ so yay. i achieved my goal of qualifying for finals. :) haha i hope that i can do a pb although that is not very possible. BLAHBLAHBLAH.

u know what ??? i feel damn sad i have so much things to do. boo ): owells. i shall get down to doing all the stuff that ive to do. AHHHHH school sucks. (:

goodluck to everyone swimming & running school nats ! (:

i picked myself up at 10:14 PM
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im much better now! see i can sit here and type this blog post. which was sth i couldnt do in the afternoon. haha

sorry if i was damn dao this afternoon cos i was in a whole lot of pain. my head was hurting crazily i couldnt do anything at all. i could barely take my medicine even. then i ate A BIT and i felt like puking. i cld barely eat! and i very very very seldom lose my appetite when im sick okay. ><

anyway after practically sleeping the whole day until like 6.30 i finally felt better but the fever's back again. think my head was hurting frm the fever.. 39 ++ degrees! haha i could barely do ANYTHING. so i couldnt do my chinese portfolio. ahwell im not gng to school tmr.. after swimming hopefully it'll be too late to go back anyway if it isnt ive got my mc too. :D im obviously feeling muchhhh better hopefully after tonight my fever will be GONE and ill be able to just finish 200im. :)

i will not give up.
you will not make me lose this chance to swim.
i will swim no matter how sick i am or how painful my ankle is.

clpf maths 8.1 chemquiz

i picked myself up at 5:20 AM
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it all started when i missed a step.
So now im asking myself.
WHY did I miss it ?
And WHY did I refuse to check if it was okay.
Running all about thinking everything was okay

… when it was not.

Just hope its not over like I think it is.
Still hoping.
Always hoping.

CO concert later.
Jiayouu ppl !
I aim to finish my Chinese portfolio soon.
Quality;quality

TUESDAY. I have one and a half more days.

i picked myself up at 1:02 AM
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FUNFAIR WAS TOTALLY AWESOME AND ROCKING. lol it was wayy cool even tho it was so tiring and all but it was a great experience. its dem nice to see everyone enjoying the ride and coming bck over and over again. its so sweet :) and the guy was really nice and helpful!! thanks lots. and well.. we raised money ! woohoo ~

lots of funny things happen. like me putting this phone into my pocket to keep then forgetting tht i put it in. >< and the cards came in useful after all !! cool. and this guy was being weird and asking me some weird question ._. haha and i ate lots and lotssss of food. i played ddr! failed miserably. much better when i played with peck. lol haunted house was COOL. meteorite was AWESOME and fondue ROCKED. yay ny funfair all the way !! <3 everyone.

thanks everyone for helping !! hahaha
(and thanks for coming too ._.)
u cant expect someone to do something for you when you're not willing to first do it for the person.

all of a sudden;everyone's being so loyal.

and its all over/
im so.so. sorry
but i can never trust anyone again.

why did it have to happen now? i almost cried.
OMG. and now my 3k's shifted early. !??!?!?! ah. i really dont want to let ANYONE down. including myself.

i really wonder whether i have any good/best friends left anymore
i wonder whether true friendships even exist on this world

i picked myself up at 6:51 AM
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