Squirrel Day!

Did you know that January 21st is

National Squirrel Appreciation Day?

Take your favorite squirrel out for an acorn quiche today.

Maybe then they'll leave your bird feeders alone?

Jonah in a seashell

Spent most of this week studying the Book of Jonah.

to prepare for a sermon. 

Maybe it was the effect of this week's  snow,

but I started condensing

the story into whatever this is..

Jonah in a nutshell?  Or perhaps a seashell. 

"God called,  but Jonah stalled.

Then Jonah split, and a mighty storm hit.

The sailors cast lots, and Jonah?  He lost!

Then the whale swallowed, while Jonah?  He wallowed.

Soon the whale spewed, after which Jonah stewed.

God said, "Get up!"

But Jonah felt set up.

So Jonah spoke of spite, but they became - contrite.

Those Ninevites repented!

And Jonah's God relented!

And Jonah?  He pouted and lo! a bush sprouted.

But soon the bush died, and Jonah?  He cried.

Then God did the talking and Jonah the balking.

And while God accused, Jonah excused.

So God discussed, but Jonah remained...

nonplussed!"

Roberta Hiday

artwork by Scott Erickson

from here

running on water

The following is a response that I received

to my last post on Matthew's Gospel

from a dear yet crazy friend, Gene Holly+...Enjoy!

  HOW WELL DO YOU KNOW YOUR BIBLE?

Who was the 3rd  man in history to walk on water?

      *

      The 1st  one was Jesus..

      * 

      The  2nd  was the  apostle, Peter.

      *

      Then there was this guy, Ralph...

 

God & Grass

The following story has been blatantly nabbed in broad daylight from the weekly email I receive from Joan Chittister's e-newsletter: Vision and Viewpoint, which you can sign up for to have delivered to your inbox. It is always filled with encouraging words. I highly recommend it. ( but I chose the clearly- in-bad-taste photos)



God & Lawn Care

God said: "Frank, you know all about gardens and nature. What in the world is going on down there on the planet? What happened to the dandelions, violets, milkweeds and stuff I started eons ago? I had a perfect no-maintenance garden plan. Those plants grow in any type of soil, withstand drought and multiply with abandon. The nectar from the long-lasting blossoms attracts butterflies, honey bees and flocks of songbirds. I expected to see a vast garden of colors by now. But, all I see are these green rectangles."

St. Francis: It's the tribes that settled there, Lord. The Suburbanites. They started calling your flowers "weeds" and went to great lengths to kill them and replace them with grass.

God: Grass? But, it's so boring. It's not colorful. It doesn't attract butterflies, birds and bees; only grubs and sod worms. It's sensitive to temperatures. Do these Suburbanites really want all that grass growing there?

St. Francis: Apparently so, Lord. They go to great pains to grow it and keep it green. They begin each spring by fertilizing grass and poisoning any other plant that crops up in the lawn.

God: The spring rains and warm weather probably make grass grow really fast. That must make the Suburbanites happy.

St. Francis: Apparently not, Lord. As soon as it grows a little, they cut it—sometimes twice a week.

God: They cut it? Do they then bale it like hay?

St. Francis: Not exactly, Lord. Most of them rake it up and put it in bags.

God: They bag it? Why? Is it a cash crop? Do they sell it?

St. Francis: No, Sir, just the opposite. They pay to throw it away.

God: Now, let me get this straight. They fertilize grass so it will grow. And, when it does grow, they cut it off and pay to throw it away?

St. Francis: Yes, Sir.
God: These Suburbanites must be relieved in the summer when we cut back on the rain and turn up the heat. That surely slows the growth and saves them a lot of work.
St. Francis: You aren't going to believe this, Lord. When the grass stops growing so fast, they drag out hoses and pay more money to water it, so they can continue to mow it and pay to get rid of it.
God: What nonsense. At least they kept some of the trees. That was a sheer stroke of genius, if I do say so myself. The trees grow leaves in the spring to provide beauty and shade in the summer. In the autumn, they fall to the ground and form a natural blanket to keep moisture in the soil and protect the trees and bushes. It's a natural cycle of life.
St. Francis: You better sit down, Lord. The Suburbanites have drawn a new circle. As soon as the leaves fall, they rake them into great piles and pay to have them hauled away.
God: No! What do they do to protect the shrub and tree roots in the winter to keep the soil moist and loose?
St. Francis: After throwing away the leaves, they go out and buy something which they call mulch. They haul it home and spread it around in place of the leaves.
God: And where do they get this mulch?
St. Francis: They cut down trees and grind them up to make the mulch.
God: Enough! I don't want to think about this anymore. St. Catherine, you're in charge of the arts. What movie have you scheduled for us tonight?
St. Catherine: Dumb and Dumber, Lord. It's a story about....
God: Never mind, I think I just heard the whole story from St. Francis.

goodbyes and hellos

Hey, where's everybody going?

Check out the migration patterns in America!

Manhattan: Young people move in, old marrieds move out.

 Detroit: Everyone out of the pool!

Seattle: So that's where everyone moved to!

Los Angeles: Last person out of Cali please turn off the lights!

(check out the other cities here)

"Why can't we get all the people together in the world that we really like

and then just stay together? I guess that wouldn't work.

Someone would leave. Someone always leaves.

Then we would have to say good-bye. I hate good-byes.

I know what I need. I need more hellos."

Charles M. Schulz

clearcutting cursors

where cursors come from

did you just move your cursor over those cursors?

i did!

Ascencion Art?

Someone asked about yesterday's Ascension art - so here goes: Disclaimer:  Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.  These comments are only my reactions.  The artwork on the right (which fills the "too renaissancey" slot) shows a "ripped" Jesus with a perfectly sculpted six-pack - which I'm assuming he worked on when he wasn't teaching, praying, and healing?  As for the completely clothed apostles, 6 are actually watching him ascend while the other 6 are looking everywhere but up.  I guess they were used to such sights.

Which brings us to the "too clip artsy" artwork - a flowing Jesus who seems to have lost an eye in the ascension process....oops...at least he's clothed....:)

And for the "too creepy" category...how does this one strike you?  This darkness doesn't exactly exude a sense of warmth...know what I mean?  But again, as stated in the disclaimer: beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Now for the "too cutesy" category- (as in cutesy feet sticking out from the grey clouds) - which I snitched from here.  This scene appears to be attached to a cross of some sort and again, most of the apostles aren't watching the ascension. What could be distracting them? 

And there you have it!  Human beings interpreting Jesus in so many ways.  We are a wild and crazy crew - made in the image of a God who gave us each such uniqueness.  Gotta love that!   

Lucy Leprechaun

Even Lucy is getting into the "green" movement.

(In case you're concerned, rest assured that
I would never dip my dog in dye
but I would dress her in that snappy hat.)

Thanks Phil for the link:)

3rd Day of Chrismas

I know this photo has been making the rounds since the beginning of the decorating season, but I wanted to acknowledge the cleverness involved. Bravo!

Coat of many layers

I'm in need of something humorous....and so on this night before Christmas Eve I give you Liberace's coat of 5 layers (if you include the collar)....wonder if it's mink? silly question?

Also, I've heard of all these songs except for "Gesu Bambino"

Saint Leontia, Part II

Now...where were we in the story? Oh yes, we entered the dark room behind the chapel. Sister Tarcisius flipped on the light switch and Yikes! We were face to face with the holy relics of Saint Leontia, an obscure 6th century martyr. What are "relics"? According to Wikipedia the word "relic" comes from the Latin "reliquiae" which means "remains." Relics were common in many faith traditions but I'm going to concentrate on photos from the Christian tradition. 

Now, as I mentioned in Part I, we were not allowed to take any pictures so I can't show Saint Leontia to you. But I can give you an idea of what holy relics look like.

WARNING: THIS IS NOT FOR THE WEAK OF HEART OR STOMACH...

This type of ancient tomb looks very lifelike or actually, very deathlike?

while this type of relic is in the shape of a statue. 

Leontia looked like a sleeping saint statue.

This is what Sally usually looks like:

but this is what she looked like after seeing Saint Leontia's tomb:

oh my!  and then she turned to me and whispered:

"And you think Buddhists are weird?"

When Terry saw the single kneeler that was placed in front of the um...tomb...he asked Sr. Tarcisius if she and the other sisters prayed to this young martyr. Looking a bit put out she pointed above Leontia and replied, "Ach, Of course not Father! Sure we're prayin' to the Sacred Heart of Jesus" (a statue which is perched on the wall above the "coffin").

I asked how long Saint Leontia had been there and Sister answered "I think she came with the place."  Poor thing. Lying there all those years in the dark. I wonder if she had originally been in the main chapel and then was just put in the back room one day during a good chapel clean out and was never returned to her place of honor? I'm sure she was glad for our company that day. Still,  we were relieved when Sister Tarcisius turned the light off and we exited stage left!

From there we returned to the parlor where Sr. Tarcisius graced us with a fabulous afternoon tea.  It's amazing how much of an appetite you can acquire just by looking at relics!  We were probably at the convent for close to three hours.  A delightful time was had by all :)

When I returned home I started looking online for any and all info on Saint Leontia. There isn't much out there except for a truly awful poem that Terry discovered and directed my way. From it we learn that she was 20, from Rome, and that there is a vial of her martyr's blood in the tomb (which sounds like something from "Twilight".)  Here is the poem:

From The Irish Monthly, Vol. 9, by Matthew Russell

"LEONTIA was a Roman girl who felt life's early glow

Thrill through her gay and guileless heart, long centuries ago:

A Christian child, although she lived in gloomy pagan years—

Soon taken from a world whose smiles are sadder than its tears.

For, ere her twentieth summer shone, that gentle hero-maid

Endured a martyr's death for Christ, and at her tomb they laid

A phial of her pure young blood, to show for Christ she died;
And still it lieth near her bones—but not on Tiber's side.

Far from the sacred catacombs that stretch 'neath holy Rome,

The relics of our fair young Saint have found a northern home

Where high the convent of St. Clare from its green hill looks down

Upon the busy quays and streets of Newry's ancient town.

Beneath the altar they repose, and here the faithful come

To venerate the sainted maid whose dateless martyrdom
Was almost milder as it passed, and sped more swiftly o'er,

Than the martyr-life of these Poor Clares who pray her shrine before.

Thus has Leontia grown most dear to many an Irish breast,

And many a fervent prayer to her is, not in vain, addressed;

And Ulster mothers give their babes Leontia's classic name,
And novices as patroness the virgin-martyr claim.

Not ours, alas! to shed our blood for Christ the Saviour's sake,

Like thee, Leontia. But our Lord will deign from us to take

The lighter hardship, longer borne, of a true Christian life—-

Help us, sweet Saint, to fight that fight and conquer in the strife. "

(I told you it was awful!)

BUT... according to this blog, St. Leontia is buried in Trastevere, Rome. If that is the case, then who is residing in the glass case at the convent in Newry?  This picture of Saint Leontia is from that blog and the young saint in that glass tomb does not look anything like the young woman we saw.   Have I succeeded in completely creeping you out yet? 

                            

ODDS and ends...

Here are a few pics of items that I found unique in Ireland....First up is cough medicine - whereas we in the states  have cough suppressants, decongestants and  oral expectorants,  in Northern Ireland in the German discount market of Lidl, here were the choices....they just seem so comforting, don't they?  So, do you have a chesty cough or a tickly cough?

And I thought these were candies at first glance -

good thing I read the label!

Another item of interest (at least for me) was this toilet

that came with a comfy back cushion...

I thought it was quite thoughtful of the small cafe owner

to provide such comfort for patrons.....:)


And let's here it for the best that American culture has brought to the rest of the world - The Simpsons -

I snapped this photo of an ice cream truck while we were waiting

for the light to change. 

awesomeness

It's been a spell since I've had any weird Sequim, WA Police Blotter news...but yesterday's Gazette provided this nugget:

July 22, 10:47 a.m. - The caller reported someone was trying to sell him a bottle of "awesome"....

Did I mention we've been experiencing triple digit temps this week? Perhaps that would explain this odd incident. I keep thinking about what I would say to someone if they knocked on my door in an attempt to sell me bottled awesomeness but I can't think of a good response - except for shutting the door. And since I finally hung St. Benedict's "All are to be welcomed as Christ" plaque on my front porch it just wouldn't be right to close the door on all that potential awesomeness, now would it?

photo: I googled "bottle of awesome" and discovered a comic created by Andy Belanger (Andy B.) which is about an unpopular 9th grade boy who finds the bottle of awesome and upon drinking it becomes - AWESOME....

Happy Mother's Day

And Nothing says Happy Mother's Day quite like a Uterus Cake!

Thanks to Jody at QG for directing me to this gem!
For more marvelous Cake Wrecks click here

Drawing Nigh on the 4th of July!

Yes you did see this one last November
but sometimes I just can't help myself and after all,
today IS the Fourth of July!!!!

...and Jay, one of our favorite models here in the Young Men's Department of Sears Roebuck & Co., is also drawing nigh in what every "groovy guy" is going to be wearing this 4th of July!

Karen and the Squirrels

My friend Karen has an "issue" with squirrels - she doesn't like them getting into her bird feeders and describes them as "rats with fluffy tails"...She and her husband Bruce trap them and then take them for long car rides to "relocate" them to uninhabited parts of town....So when I saw this picture of this very dapper squirrel on another blog I thought that perhaps it was one of "their" squirrels "on the lam" (and if you are familiar with that last phrase then you are very old indeed!)

Wanted - Dead or Alive!
Sammy the Squirrel a.k.a. Chippy, Nutter, & Cheeky
Last seen at the Home of Karen and Bruce Noble who placed him in their Squirrel Witness Protection Program.....
Wanted for crimes committed against bird feeders in the area!
If you see this squirrel DO NOT APPROACH him -
(he may be carrying a concealed weapon under his fedora)

Ever Have One of These Days?

Pack o' Poodles

In Wednesday's Sequim This Week in the Crime Report Section, under"Disturbances/Suspicious", I spotted the following entry:

"Several cows on reporting party's property..." Well that's a common occurence - after all we are still somewhat of a farming community.....But it was the next one that made me look twice. It read (and I kid you not) "Pack of 10 to 12 standard poodles, Happy Valley Road"........can you picture this? .......what kind of trouble would a posse of poodles be getting into? and what would they look like?

Perhaps they were a well groomed lot that resembled this lovely standard poodle?

Or maybe they looked like this one? Imagine 10 to 12 of these coming towards ya...scary, huh? would ya run for your life?

Or horror of horrors! Maybe they spotted a pack of pink & purple poodles?

What is this town coming to?
Is it even safe to leave our homes anymore?

Too Tall Jesus

How would you like to walk past this every day?










Is it just me or does it look like Jesus is about to drop that Bible on someone's unsuspecting head?

Miley Memoirs?

While perusing today's headlines I discovered that Miley Cyrus, the very talented 15 year old Disney star, better known to her millions of young fans as Hanna Montana, is about to write her memoirs. That's right.....her MEMOIRS......Yes, Miss Cyrus will tell us all about her arduous road to stardom and fame. She will trace her life from long, long ago when she was just a young girl wanting to follow in her father's footsteps.........Huh? Just want you all to know - I have SHOES older than her.....perhaps they will write their memoir someday of the long journey they have taken with me....tracing MY footsteps!!!