I'm going home

I'm staring out into the night,Trying to hide the pain.I'm going to the place where loveAnd feeling good don't ever cost a thing.And the pain you feel's a different kind of pain.I'm going home,Back to the place where I belong,And where your love has always been enough for me.I'm not running from.No, I think you got me all wrong.I don't regret this life I chose for me.But these places and these faces are getting oldSo I'm going home.Well I'm going home.The miles are getting longer, it seems,The closer I get to you.I've not always been the best man or friend for you.But your love, remains true.And I don't know why.You always seem to give me another try.So I'm going home.Back to the place where I belong,And where your love has always been enough for me.I'm not running from.No, I think you got me all wrong.I don't regret this life I chose for me.But these places and these faces are getting old.Be careful what you wish for,'Cause you just might get it all.You just might get it all,And then some you don't want.Be careful what you wish for,'Cause you just might get it all.You just might get it all, yeah.Oh, well I'm going home,Back to the place where I belong,And where your love has always been enough for me.I'm not running from.No, I think you got me all wrong.I don't regret this life I chose for me.But these places and these faces are getting old.I said these places and these faces are getting old.
So I'm going home.
I'm going home.

Here in my home

I love this song. 1st time listening to it, I didn't think it was made locally. Really good.

The best part - my big boss also participated in making the video. He's the man!

My new song.

Faizal Tahir menang besar in AIM!!!! See! I told some of you he is a great singer. And I don't blame him for what happened as he learned how to seriously sing, be serious and get the right 'feel' in the OIAM earlier. So, kalau dah 'feel' and sampai buka baju, bukan salah dia kan.

Tak sia2 ambik gambar with him in Jakarta earlier. Hehehe...

Anyways, I've changed my song. Before this I put up the 'Superman' song. Coincidently, he is the Malaysian version of 'Superman' ...hehehe. This is one of the songs that I love. It just gives me the strength, the motivation, the 'push' to go on and on. I also asked Dynamites to sing this when they were warming up just before the final game with our 'musuh tradisi'. (Even though they only memorised the chorus).

It helped.

Gemuruh - Faizal Tahir


Bila bertalu rentak di kalbu
Hasrat yang tersirat semakin ku buru
Bila bergema laungan gempita
Harapan bernyala nadiku berganda

Gemuruh jiwa semangat membara
Dari puncak ingin ke angkasa
Berkalungkan bintang berkelipan
Menyerlah jauh dari yang biasa


Bila bertalu rentak di kalbu
Hasrat yang tersirat semakin ku buru
Bila bergema laungan gempita
Harapan bernyala nadiku berganda


Gemuruh jiwa semangat membara
Dari puncak ingin ke angkasa
Berkalungkan bintang berkelipan
Menyerlah jauh dari yang biasa

Ungkapan ini bukan sekadar bermimpi
Segalanya pastikan terbukti nanti


Gemuruh jiwa semangat membara
Dari puncak ingin ke angkasa
Berkalungkan bintang berkelipan
Menyerlah jauh dari yang biasa

Lelaki ini yang mencintai ku...

I love this guy.
Without fail, listening to his voice makes my heart melt again and again.
I missed his 'live ' perfomance' but thank you to YouTube, here it is.







And this version is without music.....



p/s :This reminded me, once, Habibi sang me a song in his language - it made me cry. Even though I did not understand a word, the melody was so sad.
Seems that it was a love song....

Dari jauh ku pohon maaf

Without realising, today is the 20th of Ramadhan. That means there will only be 10 more days to go before we celebrate the 1st of Syawal. Wow! How fast time flies.

For the past 2 years, the arrival of Syawal brings sadness to me.Not as sad as in Ramadhan but there is still a part of me who misses the moments of celebrating it with the one I love. Thinking of the good old times. And to avoid that feeling, lately, I've been only listening to CDs in the car instead of the radio. I avoided to listen to any Raya songs.

One day, accidentally, I tuned to Hotfm and there it was , my evergreen Raya song on air.


Dalam dingin subuh hatiku terusik
Kenang nasib diri di rantauan
Bergema takbir raya menitis air mata
Terbayang suasana permai desa

Rindu hati ini inginku kembali
Pada ayah bonda dan saudara
Tetapi aku harus mencari rezeki
Membela nasib kita bersama

( korus )
Hanya ku sampaikan doa dan kiriman tulus ikhlas
Dari jauh kupohonkan ampun maaf
Jangan sedih pagi ini tak dapat kita bersama
Meraikan aidil fitri yang mulia

Restu ayah bonda kuharap selalu
Hingga aku pulang kepadamu

( ulang korus )

Restu ayah bonda kuharap selalu
Demi anakmu yang kini jauh

This song has always been my favourite and without fail, makes me sad. Even before things happened to me. Just that when things happened - automatically it makes me feel sadder when listening to it.

But this time, when I listened to it, I felt different. I didn't have that sad feeling anymore inside of me. I didn't even feel anything. It was just a normal Raya song.It is still my favorite but there's no more sadness to it.

Maybe this year, Syawal would give me a different meaning.
Maybe this year, I am going to celebrate Syawal differently
Maybe because this year, somebody really special is coming to visit me in Syawal. Somebody who has helped me to go through the tough times for the past 8 months. Therefore, I do not have to "pohon maaf dari jauh"...hehehe...


Whatever it is, I am lucky to still be here this Ramadhan and look forward to the coming of Syawal. Insya Allah.

Until then, I could only hope and pray that everything will be fine.

p/s: The other raya song that I love is "Suara Takbir" by P.Ramlee. With the music and his voice, makes me 'melt' everytime listening to it.

As the days go by...

Someday when I'm awfully low
When the world is cold
I feel a glow just thinking of you
And the way you look tonight.

Oh, but you're lovely with your smile so warm
And your cheek so soft
There is nothing for me to love you
And the way you look tonight

With each word your tenderness grows
Tearing my fear apart
And that laugh that wrinkles your nose
touches my foolish heart

Lovely, never ever change
Keep that breathless charr
Won't you please arrange it?
'Cause I love you
Just the way you look tonight...

Ya Allah,
if this is meant for me
If this is meant for us
Please do show us

I have tried my best
I think I have given my best to have the patience
To be where I am now
Still deeply and madly in love with him
Still loyal and devoted
Even though we've been apart for months

Both of us are nervous
As we could only plan
For the best things to happen
And yet, no control on it

Insya Allah,
If it is for the better
I'm hoping that
We will be together soon.
Amin.


p/s:
1 1/2 weeks away, replaced by 1 1/2 hours talk. The only thing I could say is........I love you Habibi.

Good, old songs

I'm in the mood to cheer up myself with some old songs. I love this. It was from Practical Magic - a cute movie about witches.



I also loveeee this song and the movie 'The Other Sisiter". It made me laugh and also cry watching it.



And this one from Mannequin. The lyrics just stick in my head even though it was years ago I memorised it. (I wonder how come I can remember the lyrics and not my chemistry or physics formula...)






p/s: Actually, I'm trying my very best to cheer up myself.Work is just bugging and demotivating me lately. But then, I'm just doing this for my girls and Habibi.

Superman is flying to Egypt

On 31st August, I sent somebody off at KLIA (more pics here). The boy , whom I've just got to know for about 2 years, is offered a place at a Uni in Alexandria, Egypt.
When I first knew him when he was in Form 4, I was asked to send and pick him up from his training sessions in the MABA stadium in KL, from USJ. Every day for almost a week. At times, I had to stay and watched him trained.(thank god I enjoyed watching basketball trainings). During the 30 mnts drive to KL, every time, he would just keep quiet in the car. He was this shy boy, not even a word from him.

I remembered clearly, when I asked him questions, only one or two words will come out from his mouth. There was once he actually 'melatah' when there was this loud thunder went off. That was it.That was the only word for the trip.

Then as time goes by, he talks a bit more. And we got closer. I have a brother in the UK, but I can't remember pampering him at all. So, I guess , this boy replaces him in a way. At times, when he gets a basket of 'bodoh' from his coach after a game, he would sms me and mengadu. Kesian. But because of that, he's the best player out of all.

He was in my life for a season.Not that we would not get in touch at all after this but it will definitely be very limited - with me , as always lazy to reply to sms and emails, and him being busy with his studies.

How smart he looks in the suit.

Whatever it is, he's been there, by my side when I needed a person to accompany me when there was nobody at all, even though there was no words from him at times, even though he does not really know my 'history' , that does not matter.

What matters most is.....

He's one of the person who was there to help me go through it all.

Bro Alep,
Thank you very much for being there
My prayers is always with you.
Hope you achieve all your dreams.
May you fly high......
And stay the way you are.

This song, will always remind me of you.

Then you look at me

I'm in the mood to listen to song now. And I keep playing this song again, and again.
One of my favourite song and movie (Bicentennial Man), it touches my heart every time I listen to it. (this is what happens when I can't sleep and its already 6am)

Laugh and cry
Live and die
Life is a dream we're dreaming

Day by day
I find my way
Look for the soul and the meaning

Then you look at me
And I always see
What I have been searching for
I'm lost as can be
Then you look at me
And I am not lost anymore

People run
Sun to sun
Caught in their lives ever flowing
Once begun
Life goes till it's gone
We have to go where it's going

[Chorus]

And you say you see
When you look at me
The reason you love life so
As lost I have been
I'll find love again
And life just keeps on running
And life just keeps on running
You look at me and life comes from you. From you.

The 'Dinner for 3'

It's almost 2am now and I'm still not sleepy. Just got back from the Dinner for 3. It was held in PICC, Putrajaya - and I went with with my 'chaperons'; K.Ana and Abg Ise. ;-)

As expected, nothing interesting other than meeting old friends; seniors and juniors. That reminded me of somebody who posted an email in order to sell the tickets few weeks back. The email went something like this,"Come and let's meet old friends from SDAR and STAR. This is a good time to meet others who we met in school years ago. The good old times."

Well, as for me, there was no good memory about STAR and SDAR(no hard feelings) .As far as I could remember, when I was in the basketball team, because I was tall and big, they call me names like 'giant' and others. I didn't have any friends among them until about 2 years ago when I started playing actively again and I met W. Maybe he was on of them , I don't know. But I guess,everybody is more 'mature' now. W didn't come for the dinner though.

The guest artist was M.Nasir. A few years back, I loveeee him as he was good looking and my ex looked a bit like him when he had long hair.However now, he just does not attract my attention anymore. But I stil took a shot or two - just because he is an artist.





Oh ya.And this is our school song- sang grandly in the big hall.

It's only a dream

Truly

I just give up on some people.

And currenty in the mood of listening to songs.
Old songs like this one. I love this one.

And no...this song has nothing to do with the 1st sentence above. Will write about that later.

Because of Shrek

Yes, because of Shrek3, went I returned home without any delay, I searched for the song. The song which I first heard, fell in love, memorised the lyrics till now......"That's What Friends Are For" .
Well, in Shrek, they just played the intro of the song - at a wrong timing when Merlin thought the song would help to bring in the 'mood'....hahaha..... .Besides the point, I knew about the song when I was in STF - and have never,ever forgotten the lyrics.

Thanks to Shrek, by listening to this song, it definitely brings a lot of memories back.

Dedicated to my batch 8791...Enjoy...