living in my fantasy world

on Wednesday, November 18, 2009; 4:31 PM

ole faithful blogger, i am sorry.


living in my fantasy world

on Wednesday, September 02, 2009; 2:32 PM

i wanted to do another one of those "today, i..." posts.
but that'll take too much effort cos i have to write everything to make it sound interesting enough to be in such a format.

normal prose will do.

(and the title? i want ben's and jerry's cookie dough. like, really really want. but no money. and too much fats.)

207 quiz. not too bad i think ((:
and then bitched with caleb. hahaha seriously bitchy leh we. ok no him more. but it was also a hugely traumatising thing to sit beside him. HE LIKES TO POKE FATS. disgusting.

lunch w nette. HTHT ((: thank you babe. i love you, seriously.

com251. the interesting thing? I actually stayed awake for the ENTIRE THING.

had a frazzled few hours with nette and aini and eldon after that, and then dinner with bocellis ((:
seriously missed all of them. it's awesome, really, to see them so happy and close ((: i'm watching one pair hahaha i think there're stuffs going on! i talk too much. and as usual, people make noise about my slow eating speed. THEY ACTUALLY CLAPPED WHEN I FINISHED YOU KNOW >.< hahahhaa

back home, i'm trying to decide what i should do first. other than read today's papers that is. that is of the ultimate importance cos it's HEDWIG tmr >.< wish me luck.

is it normal to miss hanging out with raviolis?? i don't seem to have seem many of them much. like have la, but not really hang out )):


living in my fantasy world

on Tuesday, September 01, 2009; 9:05 PM

i have a teensy little problem.

i keep feeling like i have a lot to do, which is to clear the backlog of 207 readings, 251 course pack, and actually LOOK at the ppt slides for genes r us (instead of being overconfident and ignoring it). which is, technically, quite a lot (although compared to some other ppl i know it's not too much). i've already completed the poems for creative writing tmr (thank goodness) and now am stuck, once again, on schramm.

if i set my mind to it, i'm in a mood to work hard, and work efficiently right now. but the thing is, i feel wrong. like this-isn't-what-i-should-be-doing-now wrong. and i keep trying to procrastinate to find the SOMETHING that is more exciting and something that i SHOULD be doing right now. which means i waste even more time.

and the thing is, i know it's just me, i don't really have something that needs to be done. unless of course it means dropping out of uni cos i'm screwing myself up there hahaha. ok i should stop joking bout these things one day i really will be kicked out for doing stupid stuff (hint: please watch kai for potential stupid things she might do)

so now i need to FOCUS FOCUS FOCUS.

on the same topic, i have a problem sleeping at night. because my mind is teeming with things and i feel empty. like there's something really important that i'm neglecting in my life, that there's something greater to life that i am not doing right now and should be doing instead. ok i'm rambling but i think you get the idea.

but the WHAT, which is the something, is proving very very elusive.

i know i'm just going on and on and on without really making much sense. but trust me, when you're in such a state of mind, it's hard to reset ur thoughts and put them into more coherent words.

i need to plan time and days to shop with aini and gang for her second present, meet up with zeling, and meet up with xunxi, and my two tuition kids are getting neglected, and i actually wanted to spend more time with my grandma (a secret plan which up till now has not seen the light of day), and...

i guess i want to find another dance class outside.

i've been saying this for weeks and months, years really, but it's never happened. i really don't feel the sense of fulfillment dancing at ntucd, must as i want to deceive myself and everyone else. it doesn't bring me a sense of excitement, it doesn't make me that happy. hccd and nycd just made me so EXCITED, you know? like omg there's practice later! now it's like, oh i have to leave cos i've practice later. it's a duty, a responsibility, cos that's what i expect of my dancers. but i'm not excited in the least. other things, like studies and whatnot, are probably taking parts of my heart out from dance, but heck, i need an environment that makes me excited again about dancing.

i miss it so much, it's like a constant ache. but i can no longer summon up that enthusiasm for dance.

DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN IT. how can this be, when this enthusiasm and happiness was such a huge part of me and my life for so many years. but i also have another problem, i have no time no money and no lobangs. damn it.

and i realise the above line about "i guess i want to find another dance class outside" just sounded SOOOOO enthusiastic. argh.


ok enough whining about my teensy little problem. or many problems, rather. back to 207. lovely COM207 readings i love you so much.


living in my fantasy world

on Sunday, August 30, 2009; 10:35 PM

i need a strong drink. really strong one. like now.

damn it i need to stop thinking too much and being so insecure.


living in my fantasy world

on ; 7:58 PM

Chron really is seriously awesome i so enjoyed myself last night. warm and friendly people with great working dynamics makes for brilliant environment. thanks caleb and liz (:

and here's the purely CS version of this facebook quiz hahaha

Instructions:
1) Go to this link: http://mct421.deviantart.com/art/Question-Meme-Generator-69266481
2) Fill it out as asked.
3) Copy each question and answer them.
4) Tag those you've mentioned!

1. What's job to you?
hahaha entertainment ((: and fellow hc-ian

2. If terence were to be mistaken for a celebrity, who would it be?
errrr. hmm. i'll say this canto singer called chen lei. hahahhaa.

3. If phil were to be mistaken for a celebrity, who would it be?
omg i have no idea.

4. Have you dreamt of becky before?
i think have leh. in one of those dreams where multiple CS ppl appeared.

5. In a race between you, aini and caleb, who would win?
ME. with aini's busted knee and caleb's lousiness, of course me la.

6. What would you do if you hadn't met jeanette?
omg die in CS. cannot imagine.

7. Oh no, pedro got kidnapped by aliens! What do you say once they get back?
oh did you all make him more normal??

8. What's liz to you?
this awesome possum person who wakes me up in 251 and intro-ed me to chron.

9. If you could do anything with caleb, what would it be?
continue all our nonsense la.

10. What would zeddy not be caught dead in?
AN UMBRELLA!!!! hahahhahahahhahahahahaa


living in my fantasy world

on Friday, August 28, 2009; 8:56 PM

We all know the all-time low international standing of the U.S. at the end of the Bush administration, to the point where, in many countries, President Bush himself was considered a greater threat to world peace than Osama bin Laden.

- from The Hindu (an Indian newspaper)
yes omg i can't believe i read something so awesome. The Hindu is SUCH AN AWESOME PAPER. read this (esp fj i think u'll like it):
http://beta.thehindu.com/opinion/lead/article8462.ece?homepage=true

(and yep the quote came from that particular opinion article)

we've been tasked to read all sorts of different newspapers from different countries and i really have to say i love it (: and people were warning me against COM251! although the term paper is a little... worrying >.< sigh.

ok back to reading the papers


living in my fantasy world

on Tuesday, August 25, 2009; 10:06 PM

i was watching gossip girl season1 episode 6 when the song happy ending played towards the end. my instinct was to jump up and answer my phone. until i realised that well, it wasn't my phone ringing. it was the show.

it was DND last night. and it was fantabulously awesome. that's all i can say about it. a glamorous night of food, fun and laughter. not to mention we were sailing on the high seas (: the pageant was really really ups last night as well, chihua, weiliang zeddy and i were well, discussing it. all the old pageant contestants hahaha. we is very old already.

eileen was the genius who did my hair. in the shock of winning i forgot all about it and forgot to thank her. SO THANK YOU HAMTARO YOU WILL GET THAT SCOOP OF UDDERS ICE CREAM TOO. although you'll have to go to lorong kilat to claim it hahaha cos it's only available there. you are a genius (:

the mood was ups, the place was ups, the food was ups, the pageant was ups, the entertainment was ups, and most importantly, the company was ups. spent half with bocelli, half with my dearest raviolis. terence has jumped ship and is no longer hanging out with us ))): terence i don't like you no more.

i am so proud of sihan and lynn (: sihan was Mr Popular AND Pageant KING ((: and lynn was seriously the best at the posing and catwalk. good job guys!

aini was an attention whore and got me to dance with her when kevin was singing. and valerie got stage time cos aini was singing amy winehouse's valerie (:

old hollywood glam is seriously SUCH AN AWESOME THEME. it's great to see everyone so glamly dressed! gorgeous hairdos and dresses and looks (: and bocelli attendance wasn't full, but it's large enough to make me happy again ((:

raviolis came in full force too. nette eileen aini terence evadne zed jennifer junhua val junqi shikin regina charlene shuwei audrey grace melmel jason. did i miss out anyone? i hope not. it was so nice just seeing everyone around again!

seriously, GOOD JOB DND COMM! although they probably will never see this. but yea it was an awesometastic time that we all had and great job!






hahaa now on to the school email. the GIP china prelude program has other stuff to beijing and i dunno where else. and there were three photos of us there!! hahaha it always feels so distant when you see random people's photos on such emails but when the photos happen to be those that were taken with you inside or on your trip, the whole feeling changes. and xuwei's big ass face is smack right there big big hahahaha.

you know chi hua was hoping either i or her will win the absolute vodka so that well, come mid september we'll have plenty of alcohol for our sleepover of two nights hahaha. but sadly we didn't )): sighhhh i shall go buy some nearer the date. anyone going overseas? get some stuff duty free back please (:

and chihua your laughter is so classic even standing far far away i can locate where you were sitting even though it was freaking crowded on the ship you know.



and i am looking forward to a weekly routine of friday mornings spent with fengjunie (:


living in my fantasy world

on Saturday, August 22, 2009; 11:16 AM